Ohio, the heart of it all

[Ed Anger]

STRONGSVILLE, Ohio—
There is a banana at large in Strongsville.

Police say that someone dressed up as a banana and attacked the Wireless Center's mascot, a gorilla, last week.

    Related
    Strongsville Police Department
    Man Sentenced for ATV Joyride in a Gorilla Suit
   

"I noticed a kid in the bushes. Then he just emerged, dressed up as a banana, and sprinted as fast as he could at our gorilla," said Brandon Parham, the manager. "The kid just speared our gorilla."

Parham and another employee witnessed the attack.

"The kid was in mid-air, flying. He just looked like a Spartan from that movie '300,' except he was a banana," added Parham.

The Wireless Center uses the gorilla as an advertising tool on Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays.

"After he got tackled, the gorilla just got back up and adjusted his head. He kept on waving his sign around," said Parham.

Police say the person dressed up as a banana split and headed south on Pearl Road.

According to Parham, the person who was wearing the gorilla costume will recover.

"This is just bizarre. It's really not normal of the food chain. That's not really how this works. The gorilla should have won," said Parham.

Police were unable to locate the banana.

They believe it was prank.

[The Brain]

 

[Ed Anger]

I like puns.

[KRonn]

This whole banana attack just seems so fruity!

[jimmy olsen]

Awesome.

[Syt]

A fruit tackling a gorilla? When did Martinus move to Ohio?

[Ed Anger]

Killer Bear Owner Chokes to Death on Sex Toy

Max Read — If you thought Sam Mazzola, the "exotic-animal owner" whose bear killed one of its trainers last year, had already used up his lifetime allotment of tabloid headlines, think again! Mazzola was found dead on Sunday, "wearing a leather mask with the eyes and mouth zipped shut and a two-piece metal sphere covering his head." Apparently, he choked on a sex toy.

Mazzola was found facedown, mask and metal sphere on, sex toy in mouth, "bound to the bed with handcuffs, chains and padlocks" in Columbia Station, Ohio, where he kept his animals (including bears, wolves, tigers and possibly one lion), by a teenaged coworker. According to authorities, he'd been bound "by request," and whoever trussed him up left, though that seems to have been part of the deal, as the cops aren't treating the death as suspicious.

Mazzola's death comes almost 11 months after the death of Brent Kandra, a 24-year-old animal trainer who was mauled to death by one of Mazzola's bears.

[Razgovory]

(CNN) -- A replica of a 1910 aircraft built by flight pioneers Orville and Wilbur Wright crashed Saturday in a field near Springfield, Ohio, killing the two men aboard, the Ohio State Highway Patrol reported.

The aircraft was reported downed shortly before 11 a.m., the agency said in a statement. It had taken off from Springfield Beckley Municipal Airport.

Police identified the dead men as Don Gum, 73, of Beaver Creek, Ohio, and Mitchell Cary, 65, of Yellow Springs, Ohio.

The cause of the crash remained under investigation, according to the highway patrol. It's looking into the incident along with the Federal Aviation Administration and the National Transportation Safety Board.

The plane, owned by Wright "B" Flyer Inc. of Dayton, Ohio -- a volunteer nonprofit group -- was a copy of a Wright Model B aircraft produced seven years after the brothers' celebrated first powered flight.

It began test flights in June and performed well, according to a press release on the organization's website.

The organization designed the plane to resemble the 1910 edition, but built it so that it could be more easily taken apart and shipped to international events, the company said in the June press release. It was built with a modern engine, controls and materials, the organization said.

Gum and Cary were members of the group's board of trustees and Cary was a former president, CNN affiliate WHIO-TV reported.

"Mitch and Don were highly competent pilots with extensive experience flying Wright 'B' Flyer airplanes and other experimental aircraft," WHIO quoted president Phil Beaudoin as saying.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/US/07/30/ohio.wright.replica.crash/index.html?hpt=hp_t2

[Ed Anger]

Yesterday was a good day, I didn't have to use my AK.

Cleveland rapper Machine Gun Kelly's attempt at flash mob in Strongsville ends with handcuffs (video)
Published: Saturday, August 20, 2011, 6:40 PM     Updated: Saturday, August 20, 2011, 11:02 PM
Amanda Garrett, The Plain Dealer By Amanda Garrett, The Plain Dealer


STRONGSVILLE, Ohio -- Rising Cleveland rapper Machine Gun Kelly was handcuffed and led away from SouthPark mall in Strongsville this evening amid a flash mob he organized.

Earlier in the week, Machine Gun Kelly -- whose real name is Colson Baker -- used social media to poll his fans, asking them which suburban Cleveland mall they wanted to gather at.

The rapper ultimately settled on Strongsville, Saturday at 5 p.m.

About that time, someone calling himself machinegunkelly on Twitter posted: "They're kicking out (people with) costumes ... Be normal, I guess? No harm here, we just like fun!"

Not long after that, someone posted a picture of the shirtless rapper -- revealing a huge MGK tattoo across his shoulder blades -- in handcuffs on Twitter. Fans soon posted videos on YouTube showing hundreds of people -- mostly white teens and young adults -- gathered in the mall's food court watching police wrestle with the rapper and chanting "MGK" as officers led him away.

By 6 p.m., fans were posting messages on Machine Gun Kelly's Facebook page seeking his release.  Within hours, the rapper posted a message on Twitter saying he and the others were free.

Strongsville police later released a statement saying Machine Gun Kelly and members of his group were charged with midemeanor disorderly conduct.

Police said mall management asked the rappers not to stand on a table near a railing by the second-floor food court. When the members didn't comply, they were taken into custody and charged, the statement said.

There have been peaceful flash mobs at the Strongville mall in recent years featuring dance and song.

But this summer, other suburbs -- including Cleveland Heights and Shaker Heights -- have had trouble with rowdy mobs of young people disrupting festivals and events with flash mobs.

Saturday's flash mob appeared to disperse quickly after police spirited away Machine Gun Kelly.

Machine Gun Kelly's stage name is based on his rapid-fire rap delivery. He is a 2008 graduate of Shaker Heights High school and gained national buzz this year following a Midwest tour.

Earlier this month, Machine Gun Kelly signed a recording contract with Bad Boy Records, a major hip-hop label.

If the rapper regretted organizing the flash mob or the charge against him, he didn't express it through Twitter Saturday.

After his release, the rapper posted: "If having fun with my fans ... means I have to get arrested ... then keep (pulling) the cuffs out."

http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2011/08/cleveland_rappers_attempt_at_a.html

The Douche:

[garbon]

I'd take him for a spin.

[Ed Anger]

Robber Uses Semi-Truck to Smash Adult Store and Steal Sex Toy

http://www.fox8.com/news/wjw-news-sex-toy-theft-lorian-county,0,262586.story

[Ed Anger]

Hundreds of panties turn up along Ohio road


Advertisement- 100 panties for 5 dollars. 100 dollars for used.
Offbeat Video of panties
Buy AP Photo Reprints of Panties

LANCASTER, Ohio (AP) -- Authorities in central Ohio are trying to solve a panties puzzle: why hundreds of pairs of mostly women's underwear were dumped along the side of a road.

Fairfield County Deputy Gary Hummel said Thursday the undergarments were found in trees and on hillsides in several spots this week on a road in Berne Township, about 30 miles southeast of Columbus.

He says some of the panties were still folded the way they'd come in packaging, while others appeared to have been worn. There were nearly 1,700 pairs in all, in a mix of colors and patterns. Hummel says when collected, they filled 10 large trash bags.

He says investigators are "baffled" as to where the panties came from.

[Valmy]

Some dude had to dump his stash.

[Razgovory]

Yesterday was a good day, I didn't have to use my AK.

No Jury in America would have convicted you if you had.

[Ed Anger]

By Emily Valdez Fox 8 News Reporter

10:27 p.m. EDT, September 3, 2011
PAINESVILLE, Ohio—
Kirtland crushed Painesville Harvey during Friday night's high school football game, but it was what happened after the game that has people talking.

"At the conclusion of the game, some of their students and parents put up a sign that we believe was racial intimidation, ethnic intimidation," said Roderick Coffee, president of the Lake County chapter of the NAACP, who was also at the game.

"For them to put it up there that was bad sportsmanship, too," Painesville Harvey football player, Jerome Becks said.

The big sign read: 'You Mad Bro.'

"I think the reference to 'bro' in the sign definitely has a racial connection to it," said Michael Hanlon, superintendent for Painesville City Schools.

No doubt, the sign offended people.

But some don't believe it was meant to be racist.

"I really don't I think the kids were just trying to say, 'Are you mad?' But you still don't need to put a sign up like that, and there's so many parents that felt the same way I did," Kirtland parent, Edie Cymbal said.

According to the Urban Dictionary, which is basically the online Wikipedia of slang, the phrase 'you mad bro?' means "To make a ragin [sic] person rage even more by asking the most ironic question."

To use an older slang phrase, kicking someone when they are down.

Kirtland High School Principal Lynn Campbell says there will be a thorough investigation.

"Any mal-intent at any game no matter where, is not supported, you know, the lack of sportsmanship, from taunting to insensitivity," Campbell said.