War in the East, 44-45 campaign.
First in Berlin gets a a case of Reese Cups from People's Reese Cup factory #1. A rich bounty indeed.
Turn 3, after 8 German infantry divisions are encircled and liquidated. WHERE IS YOUR SEPP DIETRICH NOW? Also units should start to be unfrozen in the north and south. 2 PzGr divisions look like they have been mauled and the AI is keeping them away from the front.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FZH6N6.jpg&hash=a7f6869bb3f6b15b3c3ab7c283d84c5d6b90492c)
I also discover on turn 2 that soviet arty units one hex back can contribute to prepared attacks. Trotsky would have read the rulebook. LOL
Did you turn of fog of war?
Quote from: Admiral Yi on December 12, 2011, 06:52:58 PM
Did you turn of fog of war?
I can't see what is in most of those divisions. Unless they are near my shit or recon flights fly over.
Don't the numbers on the counters give away any priviledged information?
The numbers only show attack and defense or attack and move or whatever the user sets them up to show. As you'll notice, a plethora of counters show '0-0'. Those are units he doesn't have any information on due to lack of intel.
Ah. I thought those were 8s.
attack and move is my setting.
I'm so gonna kill that 3-9 Cavalry brigade. Comrade Stalin has designated it his bitch.
Turn on the control of hexes, I like to see the front lines.
maybe tomorrow, I was doing a batch of KILL THE GERMAN frontal assaults.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FabL2J.jpg&hash=b9986e1e972e3bc8ccb29a5a54a8e889465d4561)
Die Motherfucker, DIE
Aw, the mighty krauts lost most of their arty pieces.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 12, 2011, 06:38:37 PM
War in the East, 44-45 campaign.
First in Berlin gets a a case of Reese Cups from People's Reese Cup factory #1. A rich bounty indeed.
Don't look now but Ide just got his chocolate in your peanut butter.
What are the counters with the triangle under a T? Labor battalions? I also don't recognize "P", "PC", and "SEC". I'm guessing "SEC" is security, "P" might be police.
They are Construction Units, to repair railroads.
Quote from: fahdiz on December 13, 2011, 02:23:57 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 12, 2011, 06:38:37 PM
War in the East, 44-45 campaign.
First in Berlin gets a a case of Reese Cups from People's Reese Cup factory #1. A rich bounty indeed.
Don't look now but Ide just got his chocolate in your peanut butter.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi637.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu91%2FMyasishchev%2FReesesLendLease.jpg&hash=37364a4c52fe93fca6238afa56f1ec38623087e7)
Quote from: Razgovory on December 13, 2011, 07:59:57 AM
What are the counters with the triangle under a T? Labor battalions? I also don't recognize "P", "PC", and "SEC". I'm guessing "SEC" is security, "P" might be police.
If the colors indicate anything, I think P means partisan. Though as to why some Sovs are burgundy and some are brownish green, I am unsure. I need this game.
Soviet - red are guards.
German - half black are "crap SS"
Quote from: Ideologue on December 13, 2011, 10:34:02 AM
Quote from: fahdiz on December 13, 2011, 02:23:57 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 12, 2011, 06:38:37 PM
War in the East, 44-45 campaign.
First in Berlin gets a a case of Reese Cups from People's Reese Cup factory #1. A rich bounty indeed.
Don't look now but Ide just got his chocolate in your peanut butter.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi637.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu91%2FMyasishchev%2FReesesLendLease.jpg&hash=37364a4c52fe93fca6238afa56f1ec38623087e7)
:lol:
I'd love to play a GC as the Russians, but the micromanagement of creating new Corps and Armies seems hellish.
It's all here installed on my PC, but the updated digital manual is very heavy read.
I didn't find the managing of corps/army creation to be all that difficult. It's the air management BS that I quickly grew tired of. I eventually figured it out, but it took a long, long time.
Turn 3 continues(because I'm a lazy fucker)....
In the south, with the OMGs still frozen, I use the Soviet sledgehammer to pound German divisions. Several divisions are forced to retreat, with many of them losing 50-75% of their arty and AFV's. Since I have nothing to exploit with, I'll content to blowing holes in lines. The units in the Kharkov MD are brought up to exploit with next turn.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FKb4J6.jpg&hash=24eea167c261e01c70a96ad95b0ef35f075d5a0c)
One poor Hungarian division routs. Reports from the front report that their beet supply wagons were captured, along with 'tons' of thievery tools.
Front lines turned on for Peedy.
Looks like you are about to liberate Dguller's hometown.
Quote from: Razgovory on December 13, 2011, 05:13:25 PM
Looks like you are about to liberate Dguller's hometown.
:(
Turn 4 start...
EVERYBODY GETS PROMOTED!!!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FJkn6t.jpg&hash=c58003d9d2d8fc9b650b2aec0f365f7753f2a518)
Looking at the map, the AI refills the holes blown in its lines. With what looks like many of the units that got whacked hard. Comrade Stalin demands their destruction. Also, I notice the Kiev MD has some units I can move in by choo-choo. Comrade Thomas will deliver them to the front. Or else. Commissar Topham Hatt will see to it.
The Pzgr, Panzer and cavalry units that have been hit seem to streamed back some. That is fine. The people's justice will come to them. It also looks like 2 OMG's have been unfrozen. Just in time for the Wiking division to pop up in the German rear.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 13, 2011, 06:41:42 PM
Comrade Stalin demands their destruction. Also, I notice the Kiev MD has some units I can move in by choo-choo. Comrade Thomas will deliver them to the front. Or else. Commissar Topham Hatt will see to it.
:lol:
18 months ago I wouldn't have gotten that joke.
:weep:
Turn 4, South:
Comrade Stalin has demanded the smashing of the Romanian scum.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEDx1n.jpg&hash=2dfc0b217f7a125e0a19b053af84d56b3f4ecda5)
3 Romanian units have been routed. German divsions with them are being battered. Soviet commanders are reporting supply difficulties. The scenario description warned me about that.
Meanwhile, near the Hungarian border, the Romanians begin to crack. A hole has been punched int their dirty thieving faces.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRpqgR.jpg&hash=97adc2bd274b07af962e5723219d95472ae38199)
However, mobile forces in the rear remain frozen. Comrade Stalin is using them for his production of 'Hitler has one ball!", a new film due next spring. Maybe a small pocket can be developed.
The Guards break through:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FLmeTf.jpg&hash=ae270464b78dd2f70e998064678575bd9c1118cf)
German infantry divisions are down to 4-8 thousand men and can be rudely shoved aside. Supplies are a problem.
Still turn 4:
Eek, Poland coming up. Smells like feet. Multiple holes blown in lines and armor pushing through. The unit being looked at is a wrecked SS Mot Brigade.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FizDTz.jpg&hash=0a5b5913b5ed5fce6dd2fc4b938ee8184c172696)
In Soviet Russia, game crushes you:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMSmGc.jpg&hash=784e5310a120b0060f5799a2f3b0898151216d53)
Anybody interested in this shit or am I wasting my time?
The two are not mutually exclusive!
I'm enjoying it, though. Maybe show the air screens and such for Ide's pleasure?
Showing the OOB that details who's in charge of what would also be neat.
Bonus points if you..."liberate" Yugoslavia before hitting Germany.
Quote from: Habbaku on December 14, 2011, 07:17:54 PM
The two are not mutually exclusive!
I'm enjoying it, though. Maybe show the air screens and such for Ide's pleasure?
Showing the OOB that details who's in charge of what would also be neat.
I'll do an OOB screen tomorrow. The air stuff...I basically ignoring. Airbase attacks take too long to run through.
QuoteBonus points if you..."liberate" Yugoslavia before hitting Germany.
I need my tanks in the Ukraine to release to even try that.
Also, I'm just about ignoring the Finnish front. Finland in 1944.....:zzz:
Betcha cant encircle AG Center and North at the same time. Do it man drive for the coast.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 14, 2011, 07:24:27 PM
Also, I'm just about ignoring the Finnish front. Finland in 1944.....:zzz:
They are off putting sugar in their mouths and trying to find a way to fuck that Geico lizard.
Is there ever a time when the Soviets don't have supply problems? They had supply problems when they were even at war, and all they had to supply was the local grocery store.
Quote from: 11B4V on December 14, 2011, 08:16:38 PM
Betcha cant encircle AG Center and North at the same time. Do it man drive for the coast.
Ain't no way. Considering the supply situation, small encirclements and hammering its infantry divisions is the way to go. It's panzers and GD mech division can't hold a line by themselves.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 14, 2011, 08:47:24 PM
Quote from: 11B4V on December 14, 2011, 08:16:38 PM
Betcha cant encircle AG Center and North at the same time. Do it man drive for the coast.
Ain't no way. Considering the supply situation, small encirclements and hammering its infantry divisions is the way to go. It's panzers and GD mech division can't hold a line by themselves.
Quit thinking like Eisenhower and think like Vasilevsky. :D
BTW love the AAR's keep'em comin.
its entertaining indeed.
Quote from: Ed AngerI'll do an OOB screen tomorrow. The air stuff...I basically ignoring. Airbase attacks take too long to run through.
Bomb Berlin with your sixteen or so Pe-8s. If a bomb lands on Hitler's dome, it's an autovictory.
Short Update (I'm lazy!):
The German line continues to crumble as German divisions fall back under the hammer blows of the proletariat. Now the Mighty Panzers feel Comrade Stalin's hammer:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FinxHI.jpg&hash=334b2aee4073510a1b02affac85d6acf8af1466f)
Overall, there are breakouts near Pskov. The Narva line has been breached, Luftwaffe bases run the HELL away from Minsk. Romania is littered with routed and broken units. The fucking reserves in the Ukraine remain frozen for 4 more turns. The Finns are being hammered back. Lvov is under threat. My tanks need go go juice. German divisions north of Romania continue to fight hardest, even down below 2000 men. Stop forming kampfgruppen, you fucks.
As Marshal Dodson would say:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.eurweb.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F08%2Fantoine_dodson.jpg&hash=cbbc187325a071af0e0fafea3a153412d43b8783)
GERMANS! Hide yo kids, hide yo wife!
You lost a bomber. In a close air support mission? :angry:
I don't even know you man.
Quote from: Ideologue on December 15, 2011, 07:52:19 PM
You lost a bomber. In a close air support mission? :angry:
I don't even know you man.
They lose half their panzers and you worry about a single proletariat? :lol:
Why do these games always insist on having frozen units? What are they doing?
Quote from: Razgovory on December 15, 2011, 08:25:03 PM
Why do these games always insist on having frozen units? What are they doing?
Usually attempting to force the human(or AI) to the historical opening. Or try to replicate a force that can't take a shit without a plan (Soviets).
I'm going to admit, the game looks tempting. The hex map actually looks good (I'm used to the Hex maps looking like ass in wargames).
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 15, 2011, 07:54:49 PM
Quote from: Ideologue on December 15, 2011, 07:52:19 PM
You lost a bomber. In a close air support mission? :angry:
I don't even know you man.
They lose half their panzers and you worry about a single proletariat? :lol:
Some animals are more equal than others. Two wings good. :P
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 15, 2011, 07:54:49 PM
They lose half their panzers and you worry about a single proletariat? :lol:
He's complaining because it is only one. He thinks you should be losing dozens of planes a week randomly bombing the countryside in the dark, while lying frantically about the results, crowing about how you are "carrying the war to Hitler" and claim that you are making armies and navies obsolete.
The problem with his scenario is that Stalin would have (and maybe did) shot every strategic bombing advocate as a traitor. Stalin didn't put up with that kind of shit - he was insane, but not insane enough to think that strategic bombing was a sane military strategy.
Ide is going to be so disappointed when I don't use the bomb city button.
Stalin authorized/demanded several night raids on Berlin and at least one of which I am aware upon Koenigsberg.
Petlyakov did spend time in a gulag--as did Myasishchev and Tupolev--but I don't think it was 'cause they built bombers.
Also, I'm pretty sure Stalin was in power while the VVS fielded some 800 TB-3s. But perhaps these giant aircraft which often took part in the May Day parades between 1932 and 1940 simply escaped his notice.
But yeah it would have been difficult/unwise/impossible for the Soviets to ever pursue a serious strategic bombing campaign against Germany. I'm just funning with Ed.
Most of the strategic bombing was directed at kulaks.
Quote from: Ideologue on December 16, 2011, 12:24:19 PM
But yeah it would have been difficult/unwise/impossible for the Soviets to ever pursue a serious strategic bombing campaign against Germany.
True. It was an abject failure with the far superior resources of the Western Allies when they tried it. The Soviets would have suffered an even greater defeat.
My kingdom for a functional supply system!
And I'm beginning to suspect German units are a bit too tough even when they are hammered down. I know they were great at forming ad-hoc units, but with 3 rifle corps backed by tanks, engineers and a kajillion arty pieces don't shatter the fuckers, I begin to think something is wrong.
Quote
True. It was an abject failure with the far superior resources of the Western Allies when they tried it. The Soviets would have suffered an even greater defeat.
Quotethink those who argue that US bombers never really contributed to the war against Germany are forgetting the importance of their role in killing McNair. General McNair was responsible for more US combat deaths than any German general.
Hmmm.
You all can go argue that in your own thread. For the love of merciful god, please.
Sorry. I'm certainly of no mood to rehash an argument from nearly a decade ago. I just wanted to make a joke. :(
QuoteAnd I'm beginning to suspect German units are a bit too tough even when they are hammered down. I know they were great at forming ad-hoc units, but with 3 rifle corps backed by tanks, engineers and a kajillion arty pieces don't shatter the fuckers, I begin to think something is wrong.
You're Russia.
Quote from: Ideologue on December 16, 2011, 06:17:41 PM
QuoteAnd I'm beginning to suspect German units are a bit too tough even when they are hammered down. I know they were great at forming ad-hoc units, but with 3 rifle corps backed by tanks, engineers and a kajillion arty pieces don't shatter the fuckers, I begin to think something is wrong.
You're Russia.
I suspecting wargaming German fanboism from the game setup. Just a sneaking suspicion.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 16, 2011, 06:15:31 PM
You all can go argue that in your own thread. For the love of merciful god, please.
Seconded. That Troll was so obvious and it wasnt Ide. Not mentioning any names (Grumbler)..... :lmfao:
On with the AAR!!!!!!!!!
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 16, 2011, 06:20:24 PM
Quote from: Ideologue on December 16, 2011, 06:17:41 PM
QuoteAnd I'm beginning to suspect German units are a bit too tough even when they are hammered down. I know they were great at forming ad-hoc units, but with 3 rifle corps backed by tanks, engineers and a kajillion arty pieces don't shatter the fuckers, I begin to think something is wrong.
You're Russia.
I suspecting wargaming German fanboism from the game setup. Just a sneaking suspicion.
The Russians sucked ass.
Accountants to the front! turn...whatever.
Ivan Konev's command:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FoXNyy.jpg&hash=3815f206d942d255d054ad1d906b525ced248574)
I'm going to let everybody rest a turn in the South.
The Narva is breached, SS supermen rout under the might of the 2nd Shock Army:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMr51X.jpg&hash=5d46574c3f51da48dc548c10d69812e148f61f97)
The Krauts are evacuating Estonia.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FGYfWN.jpg&hash=5bc463e397f143c12514c91ffa86474dc332e780)
Volksgrenadiers? LOLZ. Also, the outskirts of Minsk and Lvov have been reached.
Jesus Christ. Those Russian Fronts are huge.
Question: Are "Men" counted when in to taking into consideration the crews of AFVs, Artillery, etc.
No idea.
Quote from: Razgovory on December 16, 2011, 07:32:38 PM
Question: Are "Men" counted when in to taking into consideration the crews of AFVs, Artillery, etc.
If they leveraged the land combat system from War in the Pacific, which it looks like they did, then "men" does count vehicle and gun crews. I think its 3 per gun and 4 per AFV.
Turn 8, I think:
Stalin is DISPLEASED (Computer Stalin fires army commander)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FJ4Tev.jpg&hash=7cc51a50284f2399c512828ecea58337233b4eb0)
1st Polish Tank Corps (The fightin' faggots) penetrate Romanian lines. They have sucked down the 11th SS into the area. They like twinks and feet. Their dislikes are anal and Americans.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FgAPOr.jpg&hash=66e767723a248d8155773ff7da3acb6f01b26237)
Whoopsie. Somebody won't be going home until 1955.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FdKM7E.jpg&hash=0acdb62966d79ca05e7f7209ee78c033bba83c76)
Quote1st Polish Tank Corps (The fightin' faggots) penetrate Romanian lines
:lol:
Also, all the Finns just disappeared. MORE TROOPS TO THROW AT THE GERMANS.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 17, 2011, 04:29:11 PM
Also, all the Finns just disappeared. MORE TROOPS TO THROW AT THE GERMANS.
Finns, Swedes, and Norges a traitorous and flip floppy lot.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 17, 2011, 04:29:11 PM
Also, all the Finns just disappeared. MORE TROOPS TO THROW AT THE GERMANS.
Game doesn't let you push to Helsinki?
Quote from: Ideologue on December 17, 2011, 07:18:42 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 17, 2011, 04:29:11 PM
Also, all the Finns just disappeared. MORE TROOPS TO THROW AT THE GERMANS.
Game doesn't let you push to Helsinki?
I read up on it. Either you push to Helsinki, or there is a chance each turn that Vyborg, Pskov and Narva are Sov held they cry NO MAS and turn neutral. They cried No Mas in my game. Thank god.
That part of the game was the most boring.
Today I watched the last part of the BBC's War of the Century because of your AAR Ed. ;)
I am: Influential. :)
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 17, 2011, 07:24:41 PM
Quote from: Ideologue on December 17, 2011, 07:18:42 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 17, 2011, 04:29:11 PM
Also, all the Finns just disappeared. MORE TROOPS TO THROW AT THE GERMANS.
Game doesn't let you push to Helsinki?
I read up on it. Either you push to Helsinki, or there is a chance each turn that Vyborg, Pskov and Narva are Sov held they cry NO MAS and turn neutral. They cried No Mas in my game. Thank god.
That part of the game was the most boring.
Fair enough. Focus on reaching the Rhine then. :shifty:
I was fucking around with the game a bit last night and bombed a Romanian HQ. Killed the gypsy commander.
I guess I'm going to start fucking with airpower now. :lol:
:lol: Airpower is pretty good for that. In the game Berkut and I played, I seem to recall that that's how I bagged Guderian early in the war.
:yeah:
The Biafran air force (in this case Swedish pilots in sport planes) managed to kill a Nigerian general IIRC.
Turn 10, the Romanians crack...
In the south, Konev directs his forces to crack open the Romanians and feast on their gooey insides. Some volunteer to work on the Soviet Railroads in penance for their crimes:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FsT1MK.jpg&hash=5ce84730df52a02a047cfdfc62d2fb39295e1b65)
Others rout and run to cling to the rear. Papers are being burned in Bucharest. Also Gypsies:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FmfmjO.jpg&hash=deca51ba4de4a285073e18a9db3dacce9214d0da)
Tank battle in the center:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F5DeNM.jpg&hash=310749d026690f7440994c17983070d2e59476e6)
In the Baltics, Purple army reinforced by the Leningrard front, pushes towards Riga:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTkUnk.jpg&hash=30df4801a1f183f80e4cbcf5c22ea84ba6fd0293)
For Ide, an air attack on the GD:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FyY7uz.jpg&hash=4f56c2e6f6715b8f0412ab2f7411c3cae726de76)
the mongol horde is closing in on Hungary. :(
Looks like Romania and Hungary are fucked.
Quote from: Tamas on December 18, 2011, 06:47:07 PM
the mongol horde is closing in on Hungary. :(
Only thing saving Hungary from an army dashing in is that mountain range. That and Romania is a more juicy target.
Also, Commies can't supply shit.
Does capturing Ploiești hurt Axis oil production?
Quote from: Razgovory on December 18, 2011, 08:46:12 PM
Does capturing Ploiești hurt Axis oil production?
I'd hope so. I'll find out in about 10 turns.
Quote from: Razgovory on December 18, 2011, 08:46:12 PM
Does capturing Ploiești hurt Axis oil production?
Yes, significantly.
Ed, you can see why looking at the factory/production view. Each city lists what it produces.
No update today. Day 4 of the cold from hell has whooped me today.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 19, 2011, 04:49:34 PM
No update today. Day 4 of the cold from hell has whooped me today.
Bomb* that cold into the stone age!
*By "bomb," of course, I mean Nyquil.
I decided to play through the agony.
1st Guard Tank Army encircles German and gypsy forces.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FmTT7n.jpg&hash=c6a4269847d675fcb8e109ed32cf4ab5ccd2fe5e)
In Romania, the Guards break through. 3rd SS panzer division in danger. 5 Romanian divisions + 1 gypsy division destroyed.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fe7awu.jpg&hash=8117cb91c1fd7a64626b48cf948e9921a0263a8a)
Haven't finished the turn yet. Still have to go through and do the north. Also need to move air units up.
Soviet forces seem poised to capture the vast "Y" south of Lublin.
Romania defects. Italy wants to switch sides again also. NO BLOOD FOR OIL.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fpv7kp.jpg&hash=aa37cc8815f3b9143bc0e796bb5fcf466250b16b)
The entire Southern front is now a mess. There isn't much of a Romanian army left to use. I was too harsh with my new allies. Also, the 3rd SS choo choo'ed out before the defection. I've still got 5 German divisions(or remnants of) bagged in Eastern Romania. The new Czech Corps adn 7th Separate Army have been released by me to be aimed at Hungary.
Also, in other pocket news, the HG Panzer division and 7 infantry divisions are pocketed solidly now. Another Panzer division bugged the FUCK OUT however. There Germans have abandoned most of Latvia and are attempting to form a line at Riga. Vilnius is about to fall.
Comrade Stalin has ordered a doubling of the black bread ration for tomorrow in celebration. Also, 1 Reese miniature to all children under age 10.
Turn 14:
The Lvov pocket is liquidated:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fm351r.jpg&hash=4e944d40a7558118f2ce389e3b046819cdc1e126)
Ross..Rossi..Rossisk..aw fuck it. Green Front pulls its thumb out of its ass and breaks out. Wreck them rail lines. Let's see you choo choo those panzer divisions you fucking dogfucking AI.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEjWqv.jpg&hash=ca728b0494b3be4d4f8f7cd19733f810bbe0b7a3)
Many airbase units receive reinforcements from the MASSIVE national reserve, to support the coming battle for Germany. Sadly, no A-20 squadrons in reserve. WHERE IS MY LEND LEASE, YOU FUCKING POLIO CRIPPLE?
:lmfao:
I wish I could liquidate the population of Warsaw when I take it. :(
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 22, 2011, 08:46:51 AM
I wish I could liquidate the population of Warsaw when I take it. :(
You can pretend. :huh:
Quote from: 11B4V on December 22, 2011, 08:57:56 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 22, 2011, 08:46:51 AM
I wish I could liquidate the population of Warsaw when I take it. :(
You can pretend. :huh:
I want to press a button.
400,000 Poles executed. MMMMMONSTER KILL!
***ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED***
-----------POLE SMOKER-------------
:lmfao:
Honestly it doesn't look like you have much standing in the way between you and Warsaw. Unless the Germans have an Army Group beyond Warsaw you could probably make Berlin before 1945. It must be depressing to be the Axis player in this scenario. Huge armies coming at you and almost nothing to hold them back with.
I'm doing worse than historical in the center. I'm only really starting to attrit its panzer and Panzer Grenadier divisions. I did catch the Wiking snowtards in a pocket with some Hungarians.
The supply situation is fucking me up hard.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 22, 2011, 08:46:51 AM
I wish I could liquidate the population of Warsaw when I take it. :(
"City bomb."
Surround and city bomb Warsaw. Never occupy it.
Quote from: 11B4V on December 22, 2011, 09:11:05 AM
***ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED***
-----------POLE SMOKER-------------
:lmfao:
:lol:
Turn 21. Ivan Konev says "Fuck this shit".
After 3 mud turns and shitty supplies, winter comes and blows its load on my screen. With the advance slowing a halt and German divisions reconstituting in Germany (the Panzer ones seem to be coming back fast), I say 'fuck it' and go crazy with the armor. It gets cutoff, I declare the game stupid and play something else. Maybe I need to read the manual, but Bagration just doesn't seem possible. Fuck it.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FE5dM5.jpg&hash=47ec27917e4a343067bddc75184b6891558ce439)
I dont own it, but it seems like the try to stick to the historical.
I've modified my doctrine. Mech/armor/Cav must stay within two hexes of the line, or they won't be able to exploit any. And the next turn they will run out of gas.
Yay! I've got mech corps with 5 whole movement points! THANK YOU COMRADE STALIN.
Looks like you got powdered sugar on your map.
"Goering! How many times must I tell you? Stop bringing your donuts into the war room!".
Quote from: Razgovory on December 27, 2011, 05:54:39 PM
Looks like you got powdered sugar on your map.
"Goering! How many times must I tell you? Stop bringing your donuts into the war room!".
"What can I say, mein Fuhrer? Ich bin ein Berliner!"
Quote from: Razgovory on December 27, 2011, 05:54:39 PM
Looks like you got powdered sugar on your map.
"Goering! How many times must I tell you? Stop bringing your donuts into the war room!".
Hopefully, it will be replaced with Hungarian blood, as 2 of the rail line passes in the mountains are being forced by General Ivan Pleasedontshootmyfamilyov and General Yakov Smirnoff. And a army of Marts have been released and have been moved into the Vistula bulge to be used as cannon fodder.
Quote from: HisMajestyBOB on December 22, 2011, 11:19:15 PM
Surround and city bomb Warsaw. Never occupy it.
Isn't that sort of what Stalin did? :)
Quote from: fahdiz on December 27, 2011, 06:01:25 PM
Quote from: Razgovory on December 27, 2011, 05:54:39 PM
Looks like you got powdered sugar on your map.
"Goering! How many times must I tell you? Stop bringing your donuts into the war room!".
"What can I say, mein Fuhrer? Ich bin ein Berliner!"
Well-played, indeed. :lol:
Turn...errrrrrr......Its winter.
Operation The guy who names these things has been sent to a work camp is underway. Stalin demands the Vistula bulge be busted open, or he'll be very annoyed. Meanwhile, Budenny got a new sauna and hottub installed. Many peasant women will be facefucked in the name of the proletariat. Beria has put in an order of 500,000 dead poles.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRgCQh.jpg&hash=fba56a010963595c772873975ee7aedb40cc53ba)
This game is getting to be more like work. Not a good thing.
You ain't quitting, are you? I want to see you roll into Berlin. You're pretty close at this point.
Quote from: Ideologue on December 29, 2011, 09:43:03 PM
You ain't quitting, are you? I want to see you roll into Berlin. You're pretty close at this point.
I came close to, but decided to stick it out. The game is in a winter lull, with all of the Soviet Union liberated.
Edit: almost all.
I mean, it's Europe, right? On a clear day I'm pretty sure Martinus can see Zanza and Syt from his office. I like to imagine they make crude gestures indicating a gay foot fetish at him and Mart's employer is scandalized and says a Hail Mary to chase the bad spirits away.
Wut?
That kind of got away from me.
:lol:
End of the year update:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Ffa5rp.jpg&hash=f2571ccc57a371b77ee6987ddd2c72646ccae095)
Soviet forces are mostly taking a two week break, with the blizzards giving my armor units a chance to fill up on go go juice. 3 Romanian Mountain divisions cut off and killed a German Sturm division earning them each 1 bag of Reese miniatures from Comrade Stalin. Sadly, all 3 bags were stolen en route. As soon as I feel the ammo is ready, i will launch a Winter offensive, as I have gotten my guards rifles up front and backed with arty brigades.
Also the Hungarian St. Lazlo division came out to play, and got stomped on by 3 Rifle corps. Fuck you Horthy.
The 30th Guards Rifle Corps penetrated Prussian territory, leading 4 more Baltic Front rifle corps and 2 tank brigades. Let the raping begin!
Have you cleared out the Baltics? I don't think the Soviets actually managed that in '44. I think they focused on South Eastern Europe at that time.
Quote from: Razgovory on December 30, 2011, 07:35:13 PM
Have you cleared out the Baltics? I don't think the Soviets actually managed that in '44. I think they focused on South Eastern Europe at that time.
The AI ran off once I took Riga. It won't pull a Hitler and stand at all costs. Which might be a flaw in the game. No high command lunacy.
All it has left is a VG Division in a dinky port in Latvia, and I have a fortified zone and a division watching it.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 30, 2011, 07:23:59 PM
penetrated Prussian
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi76.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fj18%2FFunkMonk2000%2FButtheads.jpg&hash=9206d2204793721713b57b7f2ec1b9bb6bc04e4a)
Reese's cups and all the Germans and Poles you can violate? There is a Santa Claus. :)
Quote from: Razgovory on December 30, 2011, 07:35:13 PM
I don't think the Soviets actually managed that in '44. I think they focused on South Eastern Europe at that time.
Correct. In fact the Kurland pocket held out until the end of the war.
This game has wore me out. Literally. One turn tires me the hell out.
Quote from: Ed Anger on January 02, 2012, 05:26:13 PM
This game has wore me out. Literally. One turn tires me the hell out.
That's why I play it in bursts, 3-5 turns then break of a week or two.
Turn done while high on cough syurp:
I decide to switch the axis (hehe) of advance northwards to aim at the capital of European homofaggitry, Warsaw:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRgpa0.jpg&hash=e1609c8123c0cda9545f934f3c63c61a2d899252)
Meanwhile, the Baltic fronts aim at East Prussia:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F8raOg.jpg&hash=cde3fe861b4a7d2ee52c5349215f8eb56255a1b5)
Comrade Stalin decides to strip some units from the moribund Romanian front, who is taking a breather in the mountains in the blizzard awaiting to make a dash for the Hungarian car thieves. A ad-hoc force is assembled near Lvov around the not used very much 4th Uke Front.
No picture, as Beria ralphed all over the map.
rather than warsaw, send Zhukov and the 1st Belorussian Front on a dash through Lodz-Torun-Danzig. You seem on the verge of opening a hole south of Warsaw.
Looks like you have a lot of excess units in the Baltic. Can you shift those further south? Pushing North from the that salient south of Warsaw looks like a sound strategy. You might be able to pocket everyone in east Prussia.
The repairs to the rail network in the north SUCKS. Mainly because I don't care to do that crap manually.
I'm hopelessly behind anyways now. Budapest should be besieged.
Looks like Hitler's going to get to surrender to the Americans. :)
I've got ~30 more turns but yeah, Simpson might get there first.
This is how the game has gone so far:
http://www.viddler.com/explore/thechive/videos/990/
:D
Map sucks.....
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEZNTn.jpg&hash=26164abaab8fffd9d3e98e3976272c540773d52d)
old school baby, old school.
Quote from: Ed Anger on January 04, 2012, 08:11:55 PM
The repairs to the rail network in the north SUCKS. Mainly because I don't care to do that crap manually.
Lol. I remember now when vonMoltke put his Chinese Expeditionary Force units on AI control while I micromanaged the Nationalist Army. "Dude, how did you let me cut the north-south rail lines for your entire army and encircle 100,000 Japanese troops with the
Chinese?" :D Apparently he wasn't even watching it until he started getting weird combat reports about deliberate attacks involving tens of thousands of casualties.
Quote from: Ed Anger on January 05, 2012, 06:54:25 PM
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEZNTn.jpg&hash=26164abaab8fffd9d3e98e3976272c540773d52d)
"Improved map for HoI4."
:w00t:
RIP Funny thread. :(
To his credit he did remind us that he has a short attention span in the title of his thread. :cool:
I also didn't anticipate the cold from hell and a sciatica flare up either. Oh the agony.
As a response to Zoup's france AAR, I present this from Darkest Hour:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEStL0.jpg&hash=4f88e93da693a23d6fffc864fa4368828e9da0c5)
Good little cheese eating lackeys. :)
Syt, you are up.
Maybe it's another Syt.
Quote from: Berkut on February 02, 2012, 09:47:46 PM
Quote from: Syt on February 02, 2012, 04:37:46 PM
Quote from: Berkut on February 02, 2012, 04:24:30 PM
Syt, you are up.
:unsure:
Our WITE game, I just checked and you are up.
Ass. :P
I haven't installed it on this computer, even.
Still makes it 2-1 in my favor, since you quite a CMBB and a TOAW game on me. :lol:
That seems very unlikely. Why would I quit either of those games? Was the CMBB game the one we never actually started?
CMBB was "Battle of Minors" and at some point I didn't receive any moves from you anymore.
TOAW was the WW3 monster scenario from which you dropped because it had too many units.
Quote from: Syt on February 03, 2012, 02:11:56 AM
CMBB was "Battle of Minors" and at some point I didn't receive any moves from you anymore.
TOAW was the WW3 monster scenario from which you dropped because it had too many units.
I think you must have me confused with someone else.
:rolleyes:
The new national sport: Hitting Muslims with hockey sticks
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FcFEi2.jpg&hash=fc10a5a5f2d85140c4a23d4edd699582138475ba)
This is what happens when I can't pronounce the default names.
Duke Miroslav Satan has an accident with the new Zamboni machine and takes an arrow to the knee:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FGyoHo.jpg&hash=36e4bb5ed908f19e67ef6f631768f76671cba1f6)
Afterwards, he becomes useless and petulant. So just like the Buffalo Sabres in 2004.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FApLy9.jpg&hash=10b2b601224e4f7f6e6d1a8825c97f1db2a48a9a)
Super beetland under the king Salmons but with all the intermarriage with the Doukas, I have a big purple buddy to help me in case my hubcaps get stolen.
You got enough track suits?
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F6TedP.jpg&hash=2610e32aa3db07854b3c8675827bc65cf3cf7fec)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Flatewire.com%2Fimages%2Fwatermark.php%2Flincoln_rape.jpg&hash=98266d48b4791936c8098dd8dc7ff6a3d19e4608)
:lmfao:
L.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FoVnXQ.jpg&hash=eab93bbb9e08122432dc5ba305516d891b9b673f)
Braslav just won't budge from his Bogomil heresy.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Flnu86.jpg&hash=0e2a173af2f35a7ee25910978f74ef16e3f8494a)
Hott.
Also, Braslav attempted to blackmail the King from prison. He had a shaving accident soo afterwards.
Finished my Serb 1337 game. Game ended just as Serbia was starting to throw its weight around in Beetlandia, WEHATEJEWSLAND and Woptopia.
Welf to the 4th power...
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F1uMUX.jpg&hash=73ea07286c81efe5378b3d9d0b79098981bf6c3e)
Introducing Welf Welf Welf von Welf Welf-Welf.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FUA01f.jpg&hash=d9b5c45bb8d3407037982a167c07809039808f27)
I hated his movie.
Amusingly, the electors of the HRE selected my Welf Emperor. After he had taken a bonk on the head from some rebel and was turned into a vegetable.
Hail Welf 'the drooling' Welf! Time to steal some duchies!
Amusingly, his ducal sucessor is Welf. And his son is Wlf. So think we are up to 5 welfs in a row. Welf5
Where Welf?
L.
^_^
L.
Why are you talking that way?
WTF
Did I just spot Berkut giving grief to Syt over an unfinished game? SERIOUSLY?
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVCNbn.jpg&hash=9dd88c5df016436284b11e0766dcab10f7323a7b)
There will be a Adolf Hitler Welf. Oh yes. WELF UBER ALLES!
He will be the Big Bad Welf.
Welf II kicks ass. Our loyal vassal, the King of Bohemia grabs the crown of Poland. Good luck with those feet vassals!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F140uI.jpg&hash=d5c0fa013affbc95a510f55c4bef7c1236ccc3b4)
Welf II loves his god. He ignores the Dawkinsfags in the court and strikes at the Infidel:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FdfRRX.jpg&hash=3b630150fa2089deb869784dc81c0e3c9ac36d24)
Not shown, the new German bulwark in Spain. Hail Welf II the Cruel!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FdrCpo.jpg&hash=afc3fec0928c41180e261800caca03725da5d861)
His dog has no nose however.
In other news, the Piast's have reclaimed Poland but remain within the HRE. They are in a near constant civil war with each other and the Bohemian dynasty that I can't spell. In response, Emperor Welf the Deuce had more wenches sent to his quarters.
This game has taken on a Turtledovian tinge. :P
I told you all that Adolf would be in the game. :P
And considering the hold the Welf dynasty has right now in the game, he might be Emperor. BEWARE CAPET DOGS!
I still don't know how a newborn bastard has .4 gold. He must have strangled a Jew baby and took his stash.
Welf the Deuce dies in a MFFFFF orgy and is succeeded by.. Norbert. Despite the pussy name he quickly becomes exalted and a paragon of virtue by leading 25,000 Krauts into Spain on a crusade to liberate Burgos.
His planned successor?
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FuQN5N.jpg&hash=3362cb689433d394351510c01d28ffc49d0ff0c6)
The lolz continue.
Your opinion of Adolf Hitler is only slightly positive? :yeahright:
He should march into Italy to liberate Bungas.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FIe3cS.jpg&hash=7db876f66e14223fc1669bb27c19882e8bc810e0)
I have now wrung every bit of humor out of that.
I laughed so hard I cried, although that might be my allergies.
Kaiser Adolf is faced by a conspiracy of Jews, Gypsies and Communists when he assumes the throne. However, his mercy towards a defeated count in the civil war grants him the title 'the Just'
HEIL HITLER!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEKpsg.jpg&hash=b3a56bba46c14b38b7e546d184a23287f6251395)
I'm gonna milk this cow a bit more.
He has an ugly wife.
Where's his wife from, she look Asian.
EDIT: :lol: Asian, ugly, whichever.
Quote from: Razgovory on March 12, 2012, 07:19:14 PM
He has an ugly wife.
She's Polish. I am attempting to get Welf's into their line of succession.
I hope your name your kids in honour of Magda Goebbels' kids, to honour their belonging to one-half of da master race like their real-life counterpart.
Reinhard Heydrich is up next hopefully.
I should have done this AAR at Paradox too, but those babies don't deserve such brilliance.
:lmfao:
How did you get him to wear the mustache? :D
Shockingly, the German lords weren't receptive of Adolf Hitler taking the throne. So the Billinugs clan in Brunswick raised the banner of rebellion, taking a third of the Reich with him, including two of the four Welf Dukes. However, the brave Kaiser took to the field with 15,000 loyal Germans (the L.A.H) and did put down the the rebellion. And the wise Adolf Hitler even let the Billungs remain alive. Heil Hitler! With peace at hand, he has consulted his wise advisor Albert Speer to do a round of construction in AH's home Bavaria.
Sadly, the 4 year civil war was too intense for screenshots. In other words, the meatbag playing the game was too busy to take a screenshot.
The civil war has changed young Kaiser Adolf. And not in a good way.....
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FY3l4R.jpg&hash=eb1ee0976ab368a3489b52e2202a7cf1db2f1ac3)
The constant threat of rebellion by lowly counts makes Adolf go angry.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fc1eja.jpg&hash=e7af019ab815505a35d51f1343c1d8b3288f8ff6)
The Danes, by being inoffensive, make Adolf cross and he decides that Holstein would make a perfect duchy for Prince Loki Welf. Never mind that it was held by some sucker in the Danish ruling family. The LAH is on the march!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F6RseO.jpg&hash=370c7eb3ede8ba51565232563661e3fbab747e51)
BEWARE CAPET DOGS! The kaiser's subjects has 4 de jure claims on your shit!
With the excommunication of Prince Loki Welf, Kaiser Adolf threw a massive fit, beat his wife Eva Piast and then raised an anti-pope in preparation of attacking the Papal Sates.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FE8X2d.jpg&hash=d2cb3b3017d90f4ab27134e5d2e225acd8646032)
HOW MANY DIVISIONS DOES THE POPE HAVE?
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FAaCNA.jpg&hash=5760f1cdb9af86a2b88c95c9532d31bde0236ef5)
WHY CAN'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M CRUSADING?
Young future protector of Bohemia gains the 'diligent' trait.
Reinhard grows up...
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FnWs3R.jpg&hash=23511d41572562fd22b390d6e9b1efa7170a3d5a)
Polacks step out of line, and I'll make him the King of black bread.
Meanwhile Kaiser Adolf hears of the 'Foot fetish' and is repulsed by such sickening habits coming from the Pope himself. He lashes out...
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FLawq6.jpg&hash=f2dd5552bc1496922033dbd333f9f611baf6f738)
Disgusting.
MB, you're a national treasure, man. :hug:
I'm just not feeling it here. Gonna go shit on someone else's AAR.
:)
As the Empire prepared to assault the heathens in Spain, the Kaiser's nephew, the King of Poland stabs him in the back. The war of black bread is on. However, the jew hating dog didn't count on Marshal Reinhard Heydrich at the battle of Glogow.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FNEENh.jpg&hash=4d0e23e64ad2e19979a41498f736fec11e5a6773)
The the war ends suddenly when king Tomaz or whatever drops dead.
We check on Reinhard. He has a son!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F7tDjl.jpg&hash=abe49dd04a986985fe599c38b91e6cd9904e82ea)
How are you able to customize the grandkid's names?
Quote from: Tonitrus on March 16, 2012, 06:28:39 PM
How are you able to customize the grandkid's names?
You can't. I think the game takes the ones you use and tosses them out occasionally.
Also, when I load the save, it says it is 0% difficult now. :lol:
The further adventures of As the Welf Turns or Kaiser Adolf gets some 16 year old pussy will be temporarily delayed as real life is grinding my balls.
The beloved Kaiser, savior of the German peoples and Master of the Polack, Adolf Hitler passes away.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHe5yB.jpg&hash=06638f533a641e7d223b76acd9074d42657ad78f)
His grandson Adolf II, son of the late Reinhard Heydrich Welf, is elected Kaiser! HEIL HITLER! AGAIN!
The World, 1225:
Most of Spain has fallen to the darkies. Only Kaiser Adolf's intervention saved the Duchy of Barcelona. Scotland is gone, and some of France's duchies joined the HRE in respect to Kaiser Adolf's kindness to them. Russia is a mess, but the HRE doesn't give a shit. Sicily was hit hard by the darkies, but Southern Italy was saved and incorporated into the HRE under a Welf duke. Denmark is run by the Brother-in-law of the kaiser.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fnua0j.jpg&hash=ef41ace6c8444ba54d91538f7112635603bb5616)
You should conquer Venice and Genoa. They print money.
I see you got those nasty Poles under heel.
A bonus pic:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FuyKwR.jpg&hash=f71c17fda6d123dfe1ae48291a0921d1c5a5c31b)
The game has entered the stage where there is a race between being able to change the succession laws, and Kaiser Adolf II staying alive to do it. The lords of Germany DARE to nominate somebody other than a Welf. :mad:
There is 6000+ gold saved up for the coming civil war anyways.
Rudolf Hess Welf must be able to succeed his father. WELF UBER ALLES!
The age of Elected Emperors is over! The Welf golden age continues. The predicted civil war didn't not occur. Poland got antsy but an empty title and 90 gold quieted those curs.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FgVS4A.jpg&hash=1d7f239acb2448f39310588f56e6310fd63d2975)
HAIL KAISER ADOLF II! HAIL CROWN PRINCE RUDOLF HESS! HAIL THE BAVARIAN DYNASTY!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F0pdIa.jpg&hash=e094405d4fd089024d1d14d13e95b227c6d9768f)
Possible actions now that there is less internal turmoil:
Press Uncle Englebert Welf's claim on Byzantium
Attack the Moor in Spain
Actually Crusade for once
Invade Russia using fabricated claims
And no tim, I don't care what you think.
6000+ Gold! :o
As the Empire Turns, 1245
The kaiser noticed a frostiness in the Empress. He lifted her robes and discovered a metal lock on her pussy. TITS OR GTFO! the kaiser demanded. So she got out.
Then the Kaiser checked Princesspussy.com and discovered....
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FLxwaC.jpg&hash=65a79f4f5608067c05c55d7daa5fb9e409123ef3)
OMG! 16 year old Queen Danish pussy! So he married said pussy and had 3 more sons, named after various nazis. Who are now in line for the Danish throne.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FbRtoX.jpg&hash=5734efb8744c85b9d4005848eb9e8fd7212746ec)
Meanwhile, the power of the empire was used on a helpless Russian Duke.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTa5uz.jpg&hash=f1707f499e768d20e5b01024ffa1447d3d23544e)
Which looked something like this:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F-QG6fNlYFvXQ%2FTaLfUJDybsI%2FAAAAAAAAAQk%2F38PcrYbiw0k%2Fs1600%2FDeathStarLaser.jpg&hash=8804faf599837ce746cc55b5374d60f8a83d26ce)
:D
Princess Karin is a bit on the tubby side.
Quote from: Razgovory on March 22, 2012, 08:51:19 PM
Princess Karin is a bit on the tubby side.
She also has the 'ugly' trait.
Which didn't matter as she was Queen of Denmark, and her sons would be king. Welf sons. WELF UBER ALLES! HEIL HITLER!
*cough*
I found out that the ancestral home of the Welfs is the same as my family. They founded the town of Ravensburg in Germany and made it their ancestral seat. It is also where my family immigrated from in Germany to the US. Due to the randy nature of royalty it's entirely possible you are playing my ancestors. Hope that didn't ruin the game for you.
I'll keep an eye out for lunatic Welfs.
The Kaiser's brother, the Duke of Salerno is a flaming faggot.
What's the best way to get the other Dukes to vote you as Emperor?
No idea. Just give the dukes gold and titles and hope they vote for you.
I got Xes on your PICSes :(
Except for the one with the death star bolt ray
L.
They work for me. Imgur might be having problems.
Pics only show nazi fanboi CK2 gameplay to me.
Quote from: The Brain on March 23, 2012, 10:05:51 AM
Pics only show nazi fanboi CK2 gameplay to me.
Are you: offended? :)
A little bit. :)
:)
AAR is again delayed due to real life issues. Last report of note is that Adolf II's son Michael Wittman Welf is a damn queer and will NOT be given a title.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcheezpictureisunrelated.files.wordpress.com%2F2012%2F02%2Fwtf-photos-videos-id-like-a-well-buttered-fhrer1.jpg&hash=a1189ece2ee0a7bf5cb204f91772c2ab1f53845c)
I would buy that toaster.
I got a little time in again, and I'm noticing an increase of faggot Welfs. the Kaiser is not pleased.
As the Welf Turns, 1287
Kaiser Adolf II dies, and his son Rudolf Hess takes the throne. Which triggers a FUCKING HUGE civil war, which is still ongoing. Only the 11000 gold stockpile and the loyalty of Bohemia, the Poles and the 2 Homosexual Welf Dukes (the feet lords) keep Rudolf on the throne. And 18,000 Mercs.
Meanwhile, a Welf boy takes the Danish throne. Rudolf, seeing that he is the heir, has a 13 year old knifed and inherits Denmark and its Russian territories. In the middle of a Civil War. Good going Rudolf.
The Realm of Emperor Rudolf I of the Germans, King of Denmark and Sicily:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FAYY7S.jpg&hash=596b43337df720e1c83da87d387ef2fc95ff559a)
I sorta wish there was a 'invite lowborn scum to court' so I could make them counts and dukes instead of the TREASONOUS SCUM I'm having to deal with.
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 01, 2012, 07:33:06 PM
I sorta wish there was a 'invite lowborn scum to court' so I could make them counts and dukes instead of the TREASONOUS SCUM I'm having to deal with.
The random nobles you can invite tend to be loyal in my experience.
Anybody interested in a Warlock AAR? I'm 40 turns into a game with the skeleton dudes.
Yes
Quote from: Ed Anger on June 11, 2012, 07:02:16 PM
Anybody interested in a Warlock AAR? I'm 40 turns into a game with the skeleton dudes.
Will it have slavery?
Quote from: FunkMonk on June 11, 2012, 09:15:44 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on June 11, 2012, 07:02:16 PM
Anybody interested in a Warlock AAR? I'm 40 turns into a game with the skeleton dudes.
Will it have slavery?
Who knows. I just started pounding the keyboard to play.
I will rename the captured goblin town 'Jaronpolis"
I was thinking of buying Warlock during the Steam sale but I don't have time for vidya games. Your AAR may influence my future buying habits.
Warlock AAR, or I've got a bone to pick with you:
Turn 40 something or whatever:
The Western part. Lichmere is the starting town. 2 AI wizards are in Yellow and Green-ish. Grumbleville is the navy town:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FOifzP.jpg&hash=32a2beefba69a3dc87dc170df5bbfba5fab0b9a9)
The East. Jaronpolis is full of short green people who will be used as cannon fodder. The Human town captured in the bottom corner has been renamed 'Mobtown' due to the fact there are Dazzling Urbanite...errrr Minotaur caves nearby. Mew is where useless things(bats) are recruited.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FPJ7FH.jpg&hash=cf3694c8c86e9d114b9e012a64ae28309e9c459a)
I pissed off the Keebler elves.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F1idCr.jpg&hash=d868a4e9edaf45262547966c47ca572b5704a9cd)
Meanwhile in Grumbleville, Gauleiter Grumbler bores his citizens to death with long winded point by point retorts and sly ad homs:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FByM9G.jpg&hash=5f89335256b9e659bc604d04f75a3603acaf2a4f)
In Mew, the fagg0try reaches frightening levels:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FiD25K.jpg&hash=6028d972660b457e40e45a57b06dd1a706548ebe)
Rename Shadowmill to Beet Field.
Quote from: FunkMonk on June 12, 2012, 05:52:36 PM
Rename Shadowmill to Beet Field.
That is my gold mine city. No gypsy shall set foot in there. NOT ONE STEP BACK
Also, the dazzling minotaurs of Mobtown were last seen beating up goblins near the waterfront.
Quote from: Ed Anger on June 12, 2012, 05:54:57 PM
Quote from: FunkMonk on June 12, 2012, 05:52:36 PM
Rename Shadowmill to Beet Field.
That is my gold mine city.
Rename Shadowmill to The Ohio State University :D
Tresselville
Pryor's tattoo parlor
Art Schlichter's Haus of betting
Warlock is a dry game. Drier than a Thanksgiving turkey. I feel like I'm going through the motions playing it. It needs....pizzaz. Or something.
Yeah I found the demo boring.
MP would spice it up...
Looks like emo fantasy civ 5.
It is supposedly set in Majesty's world. Which means giant rats set fire to everything.
I'll wring 10 bucks worth of entertainment out of it.
The Battle of Gnomewall:
Being annoyed by the raids of that AI player, I decide to mount an amphibious invasion of Gnomewall. First, the grumbler fleet is assembled off the city, and skeltons begin landing:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FvnqFB.jpg&hash=cea2d2f7ee947e3d2c88235cd07993b541ba3b9a)
The battle quickly turns into Army of Darkness type farce as the AI doesn't do shit to help its city. Undead Reinhard Heydrich marches into "liberated" Gnomewall:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F8g0ic.jpg&hash=8be0192d7ba016f6d10beae00a877572f07f19fd)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F-zxurX5mVw3c%2FTVzwmbBaPcI%2FAAAAAAAAAC4%2FIr9mfcZC0_c%2Fs1600%2Farmy-of-darkness-skeleton1.jpg&hash=dff8cb48298515745f092c8dc684afb5c3184b25)
Ed reviews the recent fantasy games:
Warlock. As I said, very dry. It lacks a soul.
Conquest of Elysium 3: Map sucks, UI sucks. Game is fine, but gets boring mid game.
Final Verdict on Warlock: Not worth it at 10 bucks. Utterly generic and boring.
I may do an AAR on the muslim DLC for CK2, if i get off my ass and buy it. Saddam Hussien's dynasty will skullfuck the Byzantine's Emperor's skull in Constantinople.
AAR CKII towelheads:
DERKA DERKA! A Fatmid AAR
Start is 1066:
First I gotta figure out the new shit. Okay, I want my strawberry level low:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FvdDkv.jpg&hash=daece94a1c972e0bdc7cef630e147992966c897a)
It appears being all religious and giving titles away reduces that, along with assraping my neighbors. First, going to Mecca:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FE6FLF.jpg&hash=be6a57346948417d9972c1f77b77e419554580ff)
I also give the 3 sons more titles.
Then I decide after getting back from mecca(what a shithole!), it is time to assrape the Ethiopians:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FnXEmn.jpg&hash=671a4a5551a0ecfecd385b876170ecfbb0274660)
Nubia and Axum quickly fold. From the household troops of the Caliph only. No vassals needed. LOL. Berry levels down to 8%.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FtfVBM.jpg&hash=8947fa195d2a79476dbe5e127c1b77c27f954886)
OH, ED! You cheeky scamp.
Overseas, Norway grabs the English crown. Willie the Bastard is France's Marshal. Byzantium suffers civil wars. LOL.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FJXmMN.jpg&hash=6d17e92cdeace101db194d1620e16a4e90b97e6d)
I know you aren't supposed to have a bunch of kids, but my Caliph needs 16 year old pussy to bang.
Meanwhile, ALLAH ACKBAR! The Christian blight to the south has been annihilated. Next up, gobbling up the muslim state to the east of Mecca.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FeUbuq.jpg&hash=e688b8c5c99b7c65e1a734951632a1ca6b9e8b04)
That's the best jihad?
How else are they going to get to the virgins?
Quote from: The Brain on June 28, 2012, 04:48:33 AM
That's the best jihad?
That horse slain bit got to you, didn't it?
Having run out of Islamic assholes I could spell, I go a different direction:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FOwUsV.jpg&hash=e58f9cbf843dc0817ad4da164990033b2b7f865d)
MESSA BE EMIR OF SINAI?
Fatimid holdings, after Arabian conquests in 1079. Protip: Hire the Mameluke mercs do to the work. They ROCK.
Notice the Seljuk advances into Anatolia.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Ff3Vqy.jpg&hash=00d679d544a9fd7066b0707590b269e2484f2dcb)
Hubba, Hubba....
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FU9zRG.jpg&hash=2ba131ce9ff4472f0edfeadc08d59d0f433fa499)
Mhm.
Quote from: Syt on June 28, 2012, 02:02:10 PM
Mhm.
After one wife poisoned the #1 wife and was executed for being a cunt, I picked hedonistic wives for the Caliph.
:P
I can see Ed playing game while going "durka,durka, mohammed jihad!
Quote from: katmai on June 28, 2012, 02:13:05 PM
I can see Ed playing game while going "durka,durka, mohammed jihad!
:blush:
I like how there is a loyalty bonus for Mooselimbs when the Pope is crusading against you. As soon as the Crusade ends, every half-brother acts up.
*The host throws the Infidel into the sea*.
The new Caliph: Good work Hosni, Osama, Saddam,....
EVERY FUCKING FATIMID: HEY! HEY! THAT IS MY CROWN!
2 dead Caliphs.
1 dead at the hands of Crusaders in glorious battle.
1 dead due to faulty balcony construction. Plummets to his death after fighting(and beating) nearly every vassal to secure his throne.
Fatimids executed: 6
Fatimid sucession crisis, Pt 2. The Caliph dies of what?
The new young caliph dies of...depression. STUPID EMO FUCKHEAD.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FSG3NY.jpg&hash=b25baa0455ab1b2031110fb0d2ad3c6010c1bd67)
According to the wise man Bender Al-Wahid, "You are boned". Everything goes to hell:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FqWyWJ.jpg&hash=e28f8c55d6a29e25bb793eaa03121aea98e2c1f6)
SWEET JESUS, STOP REBELLING. Every emir with 1 goat and a sword thinks he is Caliph.
Meanwhile, in France:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F7h5Al.jpg&hash=adf2a15893fb7aafdac113a104fed212c7afa63a)
HOLY FUCKBALLS.
I'm enjoying this one, Ed. Keep up the good work.
No real update until tomorrow. I have noticed my Fatimid game is falling into the same historical trap that the real fatimids had. Overreliance on Mamluk mercs. Without them and others, the fatimid dynasty falls. But the treasury is getting depleted.
I think it is time to start taking the heads of non-fatimid family vassals. No more Mr. Nice Guy.
3 dead Caliphs.
1 dead at the hands of Crusaders in glorious battle.
1 dead due to faulty balcony construction. Plummets to his death after fighting(and beating) nearly every vassal to secure his throne.
1 dead to advanced emo (Gray Fox Syndrome)
Fatimids executed: 9
tomorrow? NO TODAY.
AAR: Civil war continues. or I'm tempted to use the cash cheat
VICTORY AGAINST THE SPELLUSTARDS! The Seljuk successor state leads a jihad against the greeks:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FL96kN.jpg&hash=2fe82b6449108e09763560696839737c863a3e0a)
The banner of Allah reaches the channel:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FFSl53.jpg&hash=338e69c143a0a138e57c4ff8ce4bef4a1e877d55)
Prince Jar Jar Binks bows to the inevitable. He joins a host of Fatimids awaiting execution when the boy caliph gets enough piety to lop their heads off:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FIhBJ1.jpg&hash=dbae9d7776e604127660108287c4ec1d5a61ff6c)
The Emirs of Cyernica and Sinai drop out of the war. One army is in Syria, the other in Hijaz:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FwWGDr.jpg&hash=d15c38b7df9b2e261386510454440aa8cf0a58c0)
The Hijaz rebels 3,000 man army got blasted by the Mamluks.
The Caliph comes of age. A good soldier and accountant. Plus he is descended from the Big Mo:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FeVngm.jpg&hash=49404496f35d67328d61016127d5f41c872a35f5)
The peace with the pope ends this year. The state CANNOT afford 10,000 kraut barbarians landing in Acre. The manpower of the demesne of the Caliph is exhausted.
Byzantards die :wub:
Quote from: FunkMonk on June 30, 2012, 07:24:23 PM
Byzantards die :wub:
Byzanteens and the French. :lol:
:nelson:
As the fatimid turns.....
With the war grinding down, The caliph gives one province each to his younger siblings. This gets the demesne under control:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FZxmYJ.jpg&hash=71cf7b0c16c15a2b8934a4dd0102389530d321e9)
Hopefully when they rebel, they won't have the strength to fuck things up.
Things at home aren't so hot. One wife gets killed by assassins, and one pulls a cunning stunt:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FPzvwv.jpg&hash=0a673832352fccdf69232c7497405bbe0caac1a8)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FB9Vzy.jpg&hash=cec91a22d44c0c9614cf0930272ed05f44179fe4)
The Assassin body count is around 5, with two wives of the Caliph since they showed up.
ASSAM CHOP!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRz3sC.jpg&hash=6acaa8babceb31e9d51d7b05e4246b2bfaa0b6fa)
This gives the Caliph enough piety to get the Assassin troops if the crusaders come:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fc3DGj.jpg&hash=4a17dff3ee254bd9bd16a3991f746335bc14df11)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FYu8lr.jpg&hash=3078de32e4fd79caad91cfb0e8e31a1acf2cdf60)
You really need to name one of your Fatamids "Siegebreaker".
Quote from: Razgovory on July 01, 2012, 02:12:00 PM
You really need to name one of your Fatamids "Siegebreaker".
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fdeathby1000papercuts.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F09%2Fcalvin-hob-evil.jpg&hash=996f5f769f131fc18337371bebbe6925500ff812)
Everybody gets knifed.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F5ceXo.jpg&hash=602f9407e158cdde733d42bef590ff33dc7f9201)
It seems 75% decadence is a trigger.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FLN4jL.jpg&hash=3e8f0a8583ffdd0ac00ab6cbc2e9df621d68997b)
Okay. I get your point. Literally.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F61gh9.jpg&hash=68cbc876be32a50a2f188f45b0ed5b2b136195fa)
This is getting old.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FJEd3v.jpg&hash=77d2e2df4c7c5b9b202d7f31bf88ba58a49f085f)
:homestar:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fmi3Ni.jpg&hash=61699747fee1c609e084f0e8730b913d5a1844e5)
Time for a big boy war. The Seljuk successor state is in the process of falling apart, so the greeks dropped the soap. Time to call out the 45K Feudal levy and Mameluks. ALLAH ACKBAR
I'm from Anatolia, and I saw kill em all!
KILL!
Must be hard to carve things into people's chests using those squiggly Arabic letters. Also somewhat inconvenient when you use chicks.
"Al-Majid, you were-"
"I was what? What the hell does this mean?"
"Uh sire, flip the tit over".
"Oh, 'warned'"
That assassin bullshit better stop when I am bashing in the heads of infidels.
Operation Don't Drop the Soap
The army of Syria opens the offensive into that little overhang dangly bit of the Empire:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FSagzm.jpg&hash=f9ee9cd76b6f45e828abe79f7a7f964ed39a6455)
The Caliph calls upon the levies of Egypt and the Assassins to form the Army of Egypt:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FKU7Cw.jpg&hash=745ac58e9759ea458c3c76597137cbacbeee8878)
An army of levies from Jordan and the Hijaz dash ahead and engage the Byzantines in Anatolia. The lighter troops of the prophet suffer against the heavier Greeks at Asponia:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FgBmEn.jpg&hash=821a6ef0f4668b4ceceb8b6e137badd5f62d305c)
4 Greek provinces fall to the armies of the Caliph. Our partners in Anatolia suck.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FKjznf.jpg&hash=7d0127f901c958939ebd0f4cbbd6fdd65109c167)
The Germans make gains in Muslim occupied southern France:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FWe1M7.jpg&hash=a51a3dee9b01cf40da95228db37a014efa2c94c6)
HOLY SHITBALLS. All armies are called home:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Flhcuz.jpg&hash=025f443eac03d27e8984acc20ba74ec259084cf9)
The Fatimids were able to build a warchest, so more Mercs can be hired.
Quote from: The Brain on July 02, 2012, 07:05:27 AM
Quote from: FunkMonk on July 01, 2012, 09:13:47 PM
I'm from Anatolia, and I saw kill em all!
:wacko:
Saw-killing is very Anatolian. Remember "I came, I sawed, I conquered"?
*groan*
The 2nd Crusade
The Assassins join the cause. ALLAH ACKBAR
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FN5aTD.jpg&hash=681072e2473934040dfabe424efee19e2fd70f92)
The 1st wave arrives. Mostly Eastern European trash. Our tires were stolen and they gave us TB.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F9Ql3M.jpg&hash=58b7d8e0422cb7eaf2d2574b847641bce706c3b3)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FSludS.jpg&hash=9d814107c076ce69e872e7bae6ad72e26c7cd725)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.buffettworld.com%2Fforum%2Fforumimages%2FGREATPOST_go_you.gif&hash=06e22bb0e521583d395e30aa6475df5a1bf6a7db)
Oh Well. I couldn't bring the power of the Caliph to fully bear on the degenerate Romans.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fp57nZ.jpg&hash=d3655d1c8bd07960814f209aafad6e776787a114)
The battle of whatchamacallit:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F3GBHh.jpg&hash=868391bbb190903778e556c6b5b3f988a7928d9c)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FqRXxw.jpg&hash=6041497fc01af2614bfe6c133a4cae0d9e6bf351)
Enough of that Eastern European trash.
OOOOOO! The knights come. HERE COMES ORLANDO BLOOM
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTgx4c.jpg&hash=b8dba35c65ecdf102b754290fc93626988a89f8d)
The Heir to the throne brings the full power of this fully operational battlestation to bear:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FUaUZb.jpg&hash=b01e54a8564e67315d4845ec21eb8f11cf1bd2dc)
ITS A TRAP!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F3H1wU.jpg&hash=f90f11d429c252fb4fb763f7f82b50e8099cfcf8)
And the Pope loses the will to fight. Fuck you Pope
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fcienk.jpg&hash=6a1d1936b85527f35e49589fabb53b02e15174cc)
The plan for the rest of the century is to do Ramadans to reduce decadence and capital improvements to Cairo to increase the demesne levy. ALLAH ACKBAR
I just found this thread. :D
Btw, they really should have used a muslim calendar when you are playing a muslim.
AAR, Part whatever. WHAT THE FUCK edition
So, I decide to bring the Atef back within the fold. BY FIRE AND SWORD
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHEikg.jpg&hash=81c4414a04d93727a250fe880299d87c2401b3a5)
The mamluks quickly assfuck them and I give the emirate to a son. Time to work the decadance down.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FmnJXR.jpg&hash=decc7cb40f064d2a7bd69935d8ef2a4ee681b3f4)
NOT LIKE THIS THOUGH. SWEET JESUS.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FDkOyw.jpg&hash=79a9018b606db6c02fa8cc7d4df1965ec6db4271)
Okay, I've fought the empire and the Pope. How hard is this goi-
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FPdejh.jpg&hash=1ac0bda7d7b37a95529db9bddc4abe803336e141)
OH FUCK ME. 70,000 MEN? OH COME ON.
Glorious.
How did you manage to max out your decadence?
Quote from: Tamas on July 04, 2012, 09:08:37 AM
How did you manage to max out your decadence?
Too many Fatimids staying loyal and not getting their heads chopped off. A couple of princes were good boys and I left them alone. They bred a shit load of mini-towelheads and I think that brought it up. Also during the civil war, I was too busy trying to put it down.
Prince Osama of the Sinai and Prince Saladin of Axum. :wub:
what happens now? game over? or you will become a vassal of those tribal fellows?
Gonna fight the war. Hilariously, the full called up levy is only 50-60K. :lol:
Plus 7000 Mamulks who have become the Praetorian Guard of the dynasty. A Fatimid player might as well keep them hired full time.
Do those guys suffer attrition?
Game trolled you hard. :nelson:
Quote from: FunkMonk on July 04, 2012, 12:58:45 PM
Game trolled you hard. :nelson:
I'm sorta dreading loading the save game later. :lol:
Even if they don't suffer attrition, you should be able to whittle them down over time. You'll be sorely weakened by the war, no doubt, but it's not insurmountable.
It appears I didn't save the game after taking those screenshots. I SHOT JR.
:lmfao: :homestar:
FFS
I farted just now. Silent. Smelly.
You should have seen my bowel movement this morning. Fudge mountain landslide.
Cool. I haven't had the honor yet today.
Quote from: Ed Anger on July 04, 2012, 01:44:39 PM
It appears I didn't save the game after taking those screenshots. I SHOT JR.
:lmfao: :homestar:
Wait, so you're saying
YOU trolled
US? :mad:
Quote from: FunkMonk on July 04, 2012, 04:45:36 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on July 04, 2012, 01:44:39 PM
It appears I didn't save the game after taking those screenshots. I SHOT JR.
:lmfao: :homestar:
Wait, so you're saying YOU trolled US? :mad:
Unintentionally.
And after loading my last save (without the 70000 death army), I worked at getting decadence down into the 60's. ANAL ACKBAR!
I found a bug. The 2 lesbian wives thing kept triggering. Even after they kill themselves. Undead lesbians? :yuk:
Quote from: Ed Anger on July 04, 2012, 06:52:25 PM
I found a bug. The 2 lesbian wives thing kept triggering. Even after they kill themselves. Undead lesbians? :yuk:
And I don't think I'll be able to continue. Undead lesbian events get boring after the 5th time.
Thanks for the AAR. I enjoyed that.
There might be a new one. I was able to start as one of those khan/dukes in the Horde, but when the game starts and 20 wars kick off, I quit.
I might try Saladin, or a decayed Fatimid start.
Try the Rum Sultanate in... 1077? It's a bit annoying as the Byzantines still have a doomstack, but fun.
The Sultan of Maur...Marit.. Ah fuckit. The bit below Morocco.
The Sultan gets a suggestion from Allah. Name your son Siegebreaker:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FxJH9B.jpg&hash=017bd2eb77ce2029dbcb52aa2ead3d7e61edf900)
Too old, too fat:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHzHOJ.jpg&hash=a10731931caa873461fd36eedbaf7026c8466ec0)
Dr Spock says spare the rod. The Sultan gets a switch.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FiKeZQ.jpg&hash=722d0b05c6b3d6ccd870fb4494368db12b93e1d3)
WHAT A PUSSY.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FsEiIz.jpg&hash=4e5a1aec5547b9beeac2f5ab791461b2165db05c)
Other shit. Lots of people were captured in battle. Lots of ransoms. The Steward steals, then returns the money. The Cousin of the Sultan rebels, and loses his titles and is banished. Tangiers kisses the Sultan's pinky ring.
Also, there are Uday and Qusay sons.
:smarty: Mauritania
Part II: I dun fucked up
Huh.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FkARWe.jpg&hash=0752b8e61a89f0193b27852592d9680cb3b51700)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fez9yR.jpg&hash=25a416508d0633f7a31ae297d62d70b0d944836f)
HOTT
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F0NMER.jpg&hash=9fe942949dd81c9c73b4552351818504ef72d364)
The New heir to the throne. This joke bit me in the ass.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FZ1tg1.jpg&hash=22128654fad905d0f071e236c4ac1634d91f1983)
A joke character might actually be a good sultan. ROR.
No way. I got my first kiss in a stable.
1 clop for yes, two clops for no. Neigh means neigh.
^_^
RIP Prince Siegebreaker McJewboy, executed by Caliph Uday for rebelling.
Boyz II Men played at the funeral.
ITS SO HARD TO SAY GOODBYE... TO YESTERDAY
On the topic of joke characters for that region, don't forget the Raisuli! :P
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.movieactors.com%2Ffreezeframes33%2Fwind-lion71.jpeg&hash=4a668bf325254ce2bee4ad682558d8eebc9bbc06)
Quote from: Tonitrus on July 06, 2012, 08:04:42 PM
On the topic of joke characters for that region, don't forget the Raisuli! :P
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.movieactors.com%2Ffreezeframes33%2Fwind-lion71.jpeg&hash=4a668bf325254ce2bee4ad682558d8eebc9bbc06)
One of my favorite movies as a kid. :wub:
Yo, Ed:
http://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/showthread.php?618144-Write-an-AAR-for-Sword-of-Islam-expansion-amp-Get-YOUR-name-in-Crusader-Kings-II
Quote from: Syt on July 06, 2012, 10:18:25 PM
Quote from: Tonitrus on July 06, 2012, 08:04:42 PM
On the topic of joke characters for that region, don't forget the Raisuli! :P
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.movieactors.com%2Ffreezeframes33%2Fwind-lion71.jpeg&hash=4a668bf325254ce2bee4ad682558d8eebc9bbc06)
One of my favorite movies as a kid. :wub:
Still a great movie. Makes me sad John Milius didn't have the opportunity to do more films like it.
Quote from: Syt on July 06, 2012, 10:48:08 PM
Yo, Ed:
http://forum.paradoxplaza.com/forum/showthread.php?618144-Write-an-AAR-for-Sword-of-Islam-expansion-amp-Get-YOUR-name-in-Crusader-Kings-II
Pass. I'm not helping with their marketing.
In support of a Fatimid attack on the Spellustards, I had a Merc company march across Spain,France, Italy and the balkans to attack the empire in the rear. Still silly as hell.
AAR: Too many goddamn homosexuals
Faggit Danes take England:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fk4Zhb.jpg&hash=b8335f90065672d4a328eeeeb06843e0a56735d2)
Don't fuck with Uday.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F0CrxW.jpg&hash=834773d17e45d379d803324231de4a184b362889)
The heir to the throne...somebody wasn't beaten enough as a kid.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FYPf29.jpg&hash=ee23bf38cf46ea6a9a3b1b8539eab756db3551a7)
HA! SPELLUS SUCKS
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTxr7p.jpg&hash=9afa4d497d803dd6085321d43b3339137ec232e4)
The Realm of the Almovids or however you spell it.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FpGpJB.jpg&hash=eab781d82b6122f9350c7445d6c5c1e69460aa60)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fuy4Qi.jpg&hash=592dae9bdc5ac9a3f2050620ad73d850cce38c11)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fweknowmemes.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F05%2Foh-you-show.jpg&hash=8beed30864856b9f76069c4ee7107b6323e5d690)
Is he really the Almoravid Prince? I need to see his long form birth certificate.
Quote from: Valmy on July 10, 2012, 12:39:33 AM
Is he really the Almoravid Prince? I need to see his long form birth certificate.
Before I left, young Prince Barack was KIA in a holy war for Navarra. But there were shitloads of Siegebreakers still running around.
With my leg improving, I'm feeling like playing a game.
Should it be....
CK II Byzantium über alles
XCOM The nazi party defends earth
Did CK2 already. Try to get Herr Himmler's head blown off by an alien plasma rifle this time.
Having Black Hitler wig out and shoot Chinese women garbon would be kinda funny.
I will starting my XCOM:Putting on the Reich AAR as soon as I jam 13GB onto my computer.
:)
As promised,
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FI6TUKkY.jpg&hash=997ee6859f1bd6e675f2983931812dcd369f06f9)
Sexy bald dude.
AAR will start as soon as I get a hang of the interface.
Map sucks.
Why is France red?
Quote from: Solmyr on February 19, 2013, 07:16:13 AM
Why is France red?
Stained with the life blood of the youth of france.
Ed casts: Resurrect!
Since it is on sale for 10 clams, I purchased Alea Jacta Est. As soon as I grok the game, an AAR is to follow. Also, I bought a bag of Beets for Tamas. I PAY YOUR SALARY.
1st up: Sulla acts all moody.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FuCeciPE.jpg&hash=48db46b83a16a118e2da46aa2928df03bb4a7f64)
Oh Baby. Sulla. :wub:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F2dLWqUk.jpg&hash=a12fa1f55dd9aedef13731d46d55801967cbd557)
Lucullus will dine on the brains of his enemies.
Lucullus has googley eyes.
What better to see Sulla's enemies with?
Sulla v Marius
First off, the scenario starts with the Pontic dickfaces acting all tough, along with their Greek buttbuddies. So I send Sulla in and teach those motherfuckers a lesson:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fa1HkO8q.jpg&hash=1af7581d95f75f8de87716b49146fcb54e3d07eb)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FmwOhL5X.jpg&hash=e9691b02227b08be4aee4f7be9c2ba4068b74f68)
Hey Marius, leave me the fuck alone. You greedy fuck.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fb88uCyD.jpg&hash=2f3401614e7bf6eeb599f4777e54d8bef30d70ba)
I send Lettowicus to sell some slaves:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVSIFvRI.jpg&hash=f9ad085f533247bfa6d5334e87a1585593193029)
Mithradick decides he wants to play. Fuck you, you Asiatic piece of shit:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F6ySEcLY.jpg&hash=29ab01b6d19e8a3783b4e0103deb3e101464ab1b)
He limps off and invades Albania. Enjoy getting your hubcaps stolen. While he plays there, I decide to get this dog and pony show on the road and go take Athens:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fx0PkWsB.jpg&hash=146675ba5c7758508362f6de33b4fd050f58e653)
Enjoy the sack, you Greek pieces of shit.
I'm pretty sure this counts as a indie game.
Either way I am reading.
Ewwww, it looks like an AGEOD game.
Party squable sucks. :(
I finally figured out how to build units. Hyuk hyuk hyuk.
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 11, 2014, 03:18:44 PM
Sulla v Marius
First off, the scenario starts with the Pontic dickfaces acting all tough, along with their Greek buttbuddies. So I send Sulla in and teach those motherfuckers a lesson:
Hey Marius, leave me the fuck alone. You greedy fuck.
I send Lettowicus to sell some slaves:
Mithradick decides he wants to play. Fuck you, you Asiatic piece of shit:
He limps off and invades Albania. Enjoy getting your hubcaps stolen. While he plays there, I decide to get this dog and pony show on the road and go take Athens:
Enjoy the sack, you Greek pieces of shit.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F-6dbkvlBDNno%2FTWX4oHnY3YI%2FAAAAAAAADAQ%2FxFwcpl582l0%2Fs1600%2FDeanna_Troi%25252C_2364.jpg&hash=60ee86d2c8724e07211f0f2c74025e84d4d87838)
"I sense a lot of anger. And hostility."
If you play as Sulla, you should play angry. Old fuckface Marius tries to remove your command? asiatic barbarian kills 80000 fellow Romans in Asia? populares going after your faction?
I'd be angry too. KILL
Quick update(no screens):
Sulla crosses into Asia Minor. After taking some cities, the Pontic AI offers peace. I accept. Sulla gets a fleet and cash.
Lucullus collects the Roman fleet, the fleet of Rhodes and the freebies and brings Sully and a butt load of Legions to Italy. Pompey and Crassus fire in an event, giving me more stuff. Sully marches on Rome, blasts a Marian army to hell and quickly besiege and assaults Rome.
Marius' corpse is dug up and raped by dogs.
Learning scenario over. Up next: Year of the Four Emperors. As Otho. Should be hilarious.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.tampabay.com%2Fresources%2Fimages%2Fblogs%2F80s%2F52841.jpg&hash=0fbed32782c90d59519911eeccd0cb39a39b5f8b)
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 12, 2014, 08:34:17 PM
Quick update(no screens):
Sulla crosses into Asia Minor. After taking some cities, the Pontic AI offers peace. I accept. Sulla gets a fleet and cash.
Lucullus collects the Roman fleet, the fleet of Rhodes and the freebies and brings Sully and a butt load of Legions to Italy. Pompey and Crassus fire in an event, giving me more stuff. Sully marches on Rome, blasts a Marian army to hell and quickly besiege and assaults Rome.
Marius' corpse is dug up and raped by dogs.
Learning scenario over. Up next: Year of the Four Emperors. As Otho. Should be hilarious.
'Ah yes finally Emperor as fortold. Guess I should look through Galba's paperwork a bit and...wait what's this? Rhine Legions in revolt and headed this way? Fuck.'
I took a glance at Otho's starting position:
He's Fucked
No legions are available to be raised. Just a gladiator unit and some Roman Marines. Plus Auxiliaries.
Totally fucked.
I mean he was barely an emperor.
Remember to leave a nice looking corpse.
Vitellius might eat it.
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 12, 2014, 09:38:12 PM
I took a glance at Otho's starting position:
He's Fucked
No legions are available to be raised. Just a gladiator unit and some Roman Marines. Plus Auxiliaries.
Totally fucked.
Mark Antony's Great-Grandson has the Danube Legions and historically was coming to help. You just have to hold out until he shows up and you have a chance.
Yeah. Right. I'm going down in flames.
Remember, cover yourself with barbecue sauce before you stab yourself.
Baron Harkonnen Fatty McFatty might lose control and stampede his own troops to get to my delicious corpse.
How does the combat in this game work?
Year of the Four Emperors
Hi Otho!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2ForIWcbn.jpg&hash=9b1cb7d13f4f0664b0da8f90f1c5d1953bb03112)
You are fucked!
The best Otho faction general:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FIS7qJKc.jpg&hash=71f60bead7935644ee4ba8a8500fb59cda240ec0)
The Danube legions start out lost alreadt to Vespasian. I also don't have National Morale to unlock the Dalmatian or Pannonia legions. So let's try to assassinate Macer, who is in rebellion in Carthage:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FXFn2t06.jpg&hash=dcb314515071c67387c196489df534cc7f54263c)
I recruit 3 units of marines, some Ponies and archers:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F5pdOtAe.jpg&hash=25f981e9a927a85c89f84a26145926aaaf505ed2)
Next turn:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FbHL7Gmo.jpg&hash=d77452c46ac531e6fe267ecea3f163f681a1a938)
DIE DIE DIE DIE. 2 legions in Carthage will unlock in 4 turns.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FGBchUeE.jpg&hash=cada4e9a119d896180398c91de6043f29870cdd2)
Killing Macer boosts morale. So let's unlock the pannonia legion.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTju31cy.jpg&hash=41ba7aef7eb846664b77f1cc9c09e2abbfd7d181)
And recruit Gladiators
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FNa5gJ0T.jpg&hash=c489b3e1b23d680511d93f99dccae13a30f9d25e)
This gives Otho nearly 40000 men at Rome.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F5axHURa.jpg&hash=e48570dc439d06f5af7360187f92f6d4ae95f5b3)
Also, a case of KC Masterpiece BBQ sauce is ordered.
Bah the Danube legions did not support Vespasian until Otho committed suicide.
They may be locked in place for the Vespasian player like the Pannonia legions are for Otho.
Who knows? All I know is, I ain't getting them.
I play some more until Tamas Gypsy software crashes:
Fabius Valens appears at the Alpine Pass:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FwMkqUWT.jpg&hash=0079efa9c09fe3b99c0ad2a9ed61dbc583e46180)
With 6 legions. Yay. Handsome is over to the right with 2 more legions. Imperator Fatty is nowhere to be seen.
Meanwhile, I move Otho to Milan to link up with some called up Auxiliaries and Cav. A Depot is built to support the army. Gaius Suetonius Paulinus will form another force at Verona with the Pannonian Legion, 2 units of Marines(about 12 cohorts worth) and a bunch of odds and ends scraped up.
A Legion from Africa and odds and ends scraped up will form a reserve at Rome itself.
I had a awesome screenshot, but the Matrix Games Beet software took it out when the game crashed. HungarianSoft games at its best. :glare:
:rolleyes:
Quote from: Tamas on April 15, 2014, 03:42:50 AM
:rolleyes:
You've nagged us to buy your company's software. Now sit there and take the abuse when it crashes.
Yeah, the barbecue sauce isn't getting any fresher, Beetalicious.
I wish Licinius Proculus would stop staring at me. Creepy ass portrait.
His eyes should really be looking over to the left. He is making sure when the barbecue sauce comes out he hands the fork to Vitellius.
Part 3:
Otho smothers himself in BBQ sauce and goes on the offensive
Cisalpine Gaul:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FoYCvKdD.jpg&hash=c9a9c50fc5612f91deb405cd5a2d6dd42aa7ee08)
Holland in Flames. Baron Harkonnen takes the pressure off in Swissland. I get a besieged legion out of there.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F4HsRehr.jpg&hash=17f144ce4c7510c72979882fbf5b88b4d9662cb3)
Harkonnen probes with some Germans. Otho kills Germans:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FuNeUFCl.jpg&hash=78c2499c333f8d5fa835aef5ced7c0083f68d915)
Otho goes to Gaul:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FwxKV9TN.jpg&hash=a22490e9caadae49df8bc197dca6d72d522a1505)
Up next:
I lose track of the turns and Otho is trapped in Gaul by the snows. Handsome shows up with a legion shadowing Otho. Meanwhile, a third scratch force is formed in Milan.
Part 4: I call Bullshit
That Cularo town surrenders to Otho:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FNAnyynW.jpg&hash=cd765123518e6ea8f24aa178c674fbadb8686cad)
I notice support in Italy waning for Otho. I've been paying attention to military matters. Wonderbread for all! Open the Twinkie factory up!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F1hqCm0X.jpg&hash=9514dddeada35195b368727070e15abf9fe8dba3)
When the road opens back up over the Alps, I order Otho back to Cisalpine Gaul. The fucker marches on Massalia instead. What a maroon.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FEOnNr5a.jpg&hash=88c0a6a02ea86f60f60716a6184afec57947adca)
Primus appears!
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHhp75HX.jpg&hash=470cac8455da09b6c80203726975bd8535466bd3)
Fuck Him. Paulinius has 40000 men in Verona waiting for the Danube legions to show up.
Otho and his starving army storms Massalia supported by 330 ships.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FTrijFM8.jpg&hash=88c5d76d593e1ec50cda02174cf7dedb33a1751e)
Game ends. Only 25 turns.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHpfoF8E.jpg&hash=3ab7523175a1e1ded9f1255ea8298ca582faed2e)
BULLSHIT.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg.pandawhale.com%2F45178-I-disagree-cat-Nupa.jpeg&hash=e4bbe4e7c6424b4122a9f2b41e4465d47fd38ab2)
Next AAR:
Caesar v Pompey (as Pompey)
Spartacus (as mr. Buttchin)
Caesar against Parthia (as Caesar)
You choose, I might listen.
Yes, I got the Parthia and Spartacus expansions with those 10 dollar off Easter coupons.
Rape Parthia! Rape Parthia!
Quote from: PDH on April 20, 2014, 07:31:12 PM
Rape Parthia! Rape Parthia!
:lol:
I have the feeling that is gonna happen repeatedly. With Caesar, Trajan and Severus.
The Trajan scenario will have extra bonus Armenia rape.
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 20, 2014, 07:37:36 PM
Quote from: PDH on April 20, 2014, 07:31:12 PM
Rape Parthia! Rape Parthia!
:lol:
I have the feeling that is gonna happen repeatedly. With Caesar, Trajan and Severus.
The Trajan scenario will have extra bonus Armenia rape.
You had me at extra Armenia rape
Nobody likes Armenians.
I vote Pompey. Because it seems ridiculous that he didn't win. When Caesar is stuck on the Adriatic Coast destroy him.
Quote from: Valmy on April 20, 2014, 11:16:37 PM
I vote Pompey. Because it seems ridiculous that he didn't win. When Caesar is stuck on the Adriatic Coast destroy him.
I took a look at the starting positions for each side.
Caesar: shitload of veteran legions. Caesars ratings are godlike.
Pompey: his good legions are in Spain. Might as well be on the moon. Rest of his stuff is locked into place. Client king forces look like trash. Rome is undefended. Caesarian unit enters Sicily, Cato runs like a bitch. So Italy and Sicily are lost. Pompey's ratings are okay. He looks sad in his unit portrait.
Caesar vs Parthia.
Okay, the start. Caesar Salad starts in Byzantium with a huge honking army:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FQRVmBNJ.jpg&hash=e8fb4c3d849f959dfcd3a3343890734cc2ee0eb3)
Dolabella is in Antioch with ~30K more men. Plus there are scattered locked units and some African cavalry. I order everybody that can move to Antioch to be with Dolabella.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FiE2vowe.jpg&hash=ccb3db8256444f20d3af18eb0b673a442bcfd534)
Shit arrives as the game goes on. Cool. Can't recruit full legions, only Vexellio and Auxiliaries.
Parthia hits first, blasting the Cappodicans. I order Dolabella to see them off.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FeDWLyiR.jpg&hash=4d7bd7d7660572ed8a782f417cc9d978f2006381)
Caesar warps in and I order his force in. Fuck the Parthians.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHOFXptQ.jpg&hash=134b9776424b4a4f1f725d8b7a82f5805ac4d843)
WHAMMO
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F9ar3kKA.jpg&hash=4d2c8874a4f2fb6ba215b3fe72b5918c1ebbc47e)
Helllllloooooo Nurse! 4 Legions are locked in Egypt. But I decide not to dicker (hehe) with Cleo.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F74AwOOm.jpg&hash=091f4e2a080a449439c2210cf995e1a03e1ab1f8)
I do pressure King Spellus I Assburger though:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FjIdll8H.jpg&hash=d79e8f7d3aa971f462cf125b37f93abf24e2aecc)
Current Situation:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FIBrGbNY.jpg&hash=769432f0582ec2cf089ee5b7d5c2da96e48ba889)
Caesar takes Edessa. Dolabella is ordered to build a supply depot. A 15000 man force of horse archers and Vextellio move up to support Caesar.
Is anybody really interested in this shit?
My God yes. I'm liking this ironically.
Is Dolabella a ninja turtle btw?
Yes, the inept Ninja Turtle.
I'm following this. Could downsize the maps a tad - they extend off the side of the post.
I like this hypothetical.
That would involve work. Which I am allergic to.
I'll continue the AAR. Caesar gets horse archers!
By coincidence I'm watching Rome at the moment so yeah, I'm following this with interest.
What other fantasy scenarios are included in this game?
Quote from: celedhring on April 22, 2014, 11:34:58 AM
By coincidence I'm watching Rome at the moment so yeah, I'm following this with interest.
What other fantasy scenarios are included in this game?
That is the only fantasy one, in the Parthian exp. pack.
The rest are all historical.
Game lost as my attempt to revive my computer failed. I needed a higher level Cleric.
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 23, 2014, 04:21:58 PM
Game lost as my attempt to revive my computer failed. I needed a higher level Cleric.
Did you try mouth to mouth resuscitation!? :o
Quote from: jimmy olsen on April 23, 2014, 07:14:33 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 23, 2014, 04:21:58 PM
Game lost as my attempt to revive my computer failed. I needed a higher level Cleric.
Did you try mouth to mouth resuscitation!? :o
Did you try dropping dead?
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 23, 2014, 07:19:09 PM
Did you try dropping dead?
:hmm: Your AAR on that didn't make it sound very attractive.
Man that sucks I was looking forward to seeing how far into Persia you could go.
I was approaching the creamy nougat of the Parthian Kingdom when my computer went kaput.
New AAR coming soon. I'm getting Flashpoint Campaigns: Red Storm off Steam for 30 bucks instead of Matrix's usual idiot pricing.
Looking forward to it.
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 25, 2014, 06:02:08 PM
New AAR coming soon. I'm getting Flashpoint Campaigns: Red Storm off Steam for 30 bucks instead of Matrix's usual idiot pricing.
I have that'n
I pick a small scenario, "A Time to Dance". Russians launch an attack against NATO when they ain't ready. Blackhorse squadron vs a Russian unit I cant remember. Fuck it.
I start with a a recon platoon. Whee, Hummers. Reinforcements start arriving as Tamas' cousins start arriving.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FHay8IaK.jpg&hash=59eb22b22c75e99fab0589b54b711a556af52c5c)
The computer shoves its Recon units over the river into Bad whatever. A platoon of Abrams murderlize them:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FlrOnDA2.jpg&hash=c92fd779dcec5711654b6985f3c8cc00293f7be3)
The crosses are eliminated units. 7 recon and 9 SPAT BDRM's are claimed kills. Only us casualty is a HQ vehicle hit in a Flogger airstrike.
Lulz, "Bad whatever". ENOUGH OF THAT FILTHY PIG LATIN
And where the hell are the West Germans? This is their home game, dammit.
This is the real world Bad Neustadt, btw. The little forest where Ed is holed up is visible North of town.
https://www.google.at/maps/@50.3370375,10.2375784,5880m/data=!3m1!1e3
They might be overstating the significance of the river in game. :hmm:
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 26, 2014, 02:18:35 PM
Lulz, "Bad whatever". ENOUGH OF THAT FILTHY PIG LATIN
And where the hell are the West Germans? This is their home game, dammit.
There is a scenario where a Kampfgruppe of 7th Panzer attacks to open a pocket. BUT IMMA STILL LEARNING THE GAME.
Quote from: Syt on November 26, 2014, 02:24:44 PM
This is the real world Bad Neustadt, btw. The little forest where Ed is holed up is visible North of town.
https://www.google.at/maps/@50.3370375,10.2375784,5880m/data=!3m1!1e3
They might be overstating the significance of the river in game. :hmm:
Lulz
I attempt to have the southern tank troop fall back to resupply, but it goes to shit and it takes a kick in the teeth. However, the Sovs get popped with little red crosses everywhere. 18 T-80's are reported as kills. Also, the Soviet AAA units take it up the butt from the Bradley's TOW's. Too bad I have no air support. :glare:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fw8hyjaz.jpg&hash=2d0a7056e12abc069a29c769210a1d5da72f0741)
A pair of Floggers return and pop a pair of Humvees and a Bradley. NICE AIR DEFENSE.
The two Soviet tank companies in BAD COMPANY are down to one tank each.
A Soviet Mech Company gets Assraped by 2 M1 platoons. They don't even get a chance to fire their ATGM's.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FeP4hn1X.jpg&hash=d8b6cbf1613544f6c7e05f9ccca56c4c846a6a52)
little red crosses give me a boner.
So how many Soviet battlefield commanders have been executed so far?
I ain't doing so hot either. I'm John Larroquette from Stripes.
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 26, 2014, 05:34:43 PM
I ain't doing so hot either. I'm John Larroquette from Stripes.
Do you have a good view of the showers?
yes
Quote from: crazy canuck on November 26, 2014, 05:46:12 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 26, 2014, 05:34:43 PM
I ain't doing so hot either. I'm John Larroquette from Stripes.
Do you have a good view of the showers?
I always thought the first chick they show in the scene looks like a very young Kate Mulgrew (with very nice boobies).
Quote from: Syt on November 26, 2014, 02:24:44 PM
This is the real world Bad Neustadt, btw. The little forest where Ed is holed up is visible North of town.
https://www.google.at/maps/@50.3370375,10.2375784,5880m/data=!3m1!1e3
They might be overstating the significance of the river in game. :hmm:
That's the general area I was at.
Fun fact: T-80U's have an ATGM.
I lost two tank platoons withdrawing to resupply to two Sov tank companies firing waves of those little shits.
My family got a plaque in rememberance. Smartass game.
http://www.ontargetsimulations.com/?page_id=163
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 27, 2014, 08:29:04 PM
Fun fact: T-80U's have an ATGM.
If you had played more NATO-WP games back in the day, and less white-on-black pewpewJew, you'd have known that, BALLSACEUR.
My book of Warsaw Pact weaponry is from the late 70's.
Somebody is jealous of my SS runes.
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 27, 2014, 08:29:04 PM
Fun fact: T-80U's have an ATGM.
I lost two tank platoons withdrawing to resupply to two Sov tank companies firing waves of those little shits.
My family got a plaque in rememberance. Smartass game.
Lol what a loser
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 27, 2014, 09:34:00 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 27, 2014, 08:29:04 PM
Fun fact: T-80U's have an ATGM.
If you had played more NATO-WP games back in the day, and less white-on-black pewpewJew, you'd have known that, BALLSACEUR.
Yes, for shame.
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 27, 2014, 09:45:29 PM
Somebody is jealous of my SS runes.
Suck it,
Oberstlimpnant.
You can all lovingly lick my ball sack.
Next, you'll expect me to read the manual. As if. :rolleyes:
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 27, 2014, 09:47:26 PM
You can all lovingly lick my ball sack.
Apparently the Warsaw Pact already blew it to hell and back.
Yes, yes it did.
Quote from: Ed Anger on November 27, 2014, 08:29:04 PM
Fun fact: T-80U's have an ATGM.
I lost two tank platoons withdrawing to resupply to two Sov tank companies firing waves of those little shits.
My family got a plaque in rememberance. Smartass game.
Reds liked to put ATGMs on everything. Tanks, Helicopters, Weird little things that looked like boats with wheels. I'm surprised they didn't put them on their helmets.
ATGM = Adidas Tracksuit Gold Medallion
DG has one of those.
Seedy wants Krauts, Seedy gets krauts. Scenario is Red Banner Slam. Scratch group of Jagers and Panzer reinforcments to stop a Soviet breakthrough, blah blah blah.
The Opening setup. Jager Battalion tanks are M48's with 105's.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FBwhTH54.jpg&hash=c50f6db3caec45d8e1b62864e7d20cc9ecf9dead)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FRTxqhxO.jpg&hash=d153ca25101eaa838993eaa21b6402a4c210c48a)
I feel a bit queasy, as the German counters aren't White on Black.
A pair of Hinds show up, shoot up a couple of tanks, jeeps and then fly over my sole AA unit. 2 less hinds.
Meanwhile, Some Hips show up, float around my units, spot for artillery which kills more of my stuff and avoit the 20mm guns of the AA unit. Apparently, Manpads wern't issued to my infantry. :glare:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F2QXQEGn.jpg&hash=f614903d24a0ad4aac934026e1be0ad3e822cd7d)
This game begins to annoy me.
M48A2 was augmented by the Leo 1 gun in late 70s, and indeed handed out to some Jäger units.
You can't tell if the German units are wearing leather overcoats.
Get those panzers rolling UberFührer. :mad:
Quote from: 11B4V on December 01, 2014, 06:32:23 PM
Get those panzers rolling UberFührer. :mad:
I roll on my schedule.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.giphy.com%2Fmedia%2FRjr7PlxQj8aQg%2Fgiphy.gif&hash=3a071d5e6e841e1ceda9ef12f8191bf6bd7f5392)
ICH BIN EIN ROASTBEEFLINER
In a super minor update, I discovered how to blow bridges. After a T-80 tank company takes the bridge. Whoops.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmovie-dude.co.uk%2FTelly%2520Savalas%2520%2520Battle%2520of%2520the%2520Bulge%2520%281965%29.jpg&hash=b3d814527cd1380ce576465cf58851f7225ddcd1)
I suck at this game
It's very close to the Assault series. Perhaps checkers is more your speed. :P
Pied Piper scenario was good.
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/1504462_10202530133925802_1070312773_o.jpg)
Mousetrap.
And I might try that Pied Piper scenario. AS THE RUSSIANS.
:o
Putin on the Ritz
:yeahright: Putin on the fritz.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.anorak.co.uk%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F09%2Fputin.gif&hash=2e69bb71236f7ea5219b2f7189b02624d7b4707f)
:lol:
Fake.
May you deluged with RT articles.
Quote from: Ed Anger on December 04, 2014, 04:40:55 PM
Mousetrap.
And I might try that Pied Piper scenario. AS THE RUSSIANS.
I'd be interested to see how the comp deploys the WG units in that scenario. I deployed the Leopards with mutually supported interlocking fire. It was a buzz-saw and chewed the lead elements of Seedy's vaunted 3rd Shock army on that axis. :blurgh:
BTW are you loaded with the latest Patch? If so how are the Hinds? When the came first came out they were way over rated.
2.06 or whatever the latest version is on steam.
And the Hinds are flying rape machines.
It'll be a bit before I can play it. Dad went in for more surgery today and I've ran my ass off today. And likely tomorrow too.
Hope everything's OK.
The old buzzard is fine. He was flirting with the nurses.
Good.
anyhoo.
I should refamilarize myself with this and we should roll a PBEM or two.
Things I remember off the top o the head
-Know units commands/ORDERS,
-understand orders delays
-Types of Arty missions
-position your ADA for best coverage.
-Keep an eye on command clock
-I played with the limited staff
-Keep an eye on unit readiness/ammo
-Use the terrain offensive/defense
-Always mutually support(never leave a unit out hanging)
-Do a good mission/terrain analysis. OCOKA
Quote from: 11B4V on December 04, 2014, 05:44:58 PM
I'd be interested to see how the comp deploys the WG units in that scenario. I deployed the Leopards with mutually supported interlocking fire. It was a buzz-saw and chewed the lead elements of Seedy's vaunted 3rd Shock army on that axis. :blurgh:
An obvious glitch in the programming. :mad:
Mech Company enters hidden minefield. 10 BTR's blow up. RUSSIANS AREN'T THAT STUPID
Fuck this game.
:lol:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FMcbbkN1.jpg&hash=a34affa49947859a6057288b2ea399a60b7b1715)
*giggles*
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi13.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fa299%2FSlayhem%2Fcosplay_zpsc12b3359.jpg&hash=28eb334b41c3fdc8113f297ac3700b5e7d8f0f58)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F2.bp.blogspot.com%2F_xdN0QQwsP1A%2FS_7sfu5fE0I%2FAAAAAAAAHt8%2FYGJRYxzscNg%2Fs400%2Fvlcsnap-2010-05-27-13h43m32s197.png&hash=4e1aa7cc290faf06872523ce930202970ea9483d)
Quote from: The Brain on December 28, 2014, 03:09:18 PM
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi13.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fa299%2FSlayhem%2Fcosplay_zpsc12b3359.jpg&hash=28eb334b41c3fdc8113f297ac3700b5e7d8f0f58)
Is that Fatmai in the green lantern costume?
I wish i had that much hair.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fdp0d5BI.jpg&hash=51c23555027c570e6c8915b13a7fef7e2c93ac74)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi13.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fa299%2FSlayhem%2Fmeinkampfamazon_zps725ce6e3.jpg&hash=4dbd51d23458418a6a256f3079e77e8529dd527f)
"It's bollocks"
- Winston Churchill, one star
"I found it interesting and inspiring"
- Vidkun Quisling, five stars
"Don't steal my thunder, you little Austrian prick"
- Benito Mussolini, one star
"You have interesting ideas, and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter"
- Joseph "Joe Man of Steel" Stalin
"We surrender!"
- Someone French
"I fix bathroom, you leave country alone, yes?"
- Some Polish guy
"In the future, we will only make porn"
- Some Czech guy
"We've already put out the red carpet, hope you won't find our fighting back a hassle"
- All of Denmark
"We have a defence? Why didn't anyone tell me about this?"
- Just about everyone in Norway
"Oh, well, hello sailor!"
- Admiral Horthy
"Hello, I have iron ore to sell"
- Sweden
"He doesn't nearly enough enjoy a good chat in front of the fireplace, that one. Pass me the sherry, please"
- F.D.R.
"U game 4 war???????"
- Tojo (2Jo in World of Warcraft)
:lol:
Quote from: Norgy on January 03, 2015, 07:01:00 PM
(snip)
"You have interesting ideas, and I would like to subscribe to your newsletter"
- Joseph "Joe Man of Steel" Stalin
"In the future, we will only make porn"
- Some Czech guy
(snip)
These are in the wrong order!
Apparently Adolf Hitler's author blog gets updated as often as Hansie's. :(
Quote from: The Brain on January 08, 2015, 04:55:54 PM
Apparently Adolf Hitler's author blog gets updated as often as Hansie's. :(
Kids are a time killer.
Since Civil War II is 20 bucks on Steam, I stole from the girl's piggybanks and got the game.
Prepare for the War of Mew Aggression.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.meh.ro%2Fthumbnail%2F2010_02%2Fmeh.ro2203.jpg&hash=5dd372e9af613e29f49fe621621e78b016d77446)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FOQ7pa9j.jpg&hash=4ff9994c02f316494dcf1806b4d9bad4990e2f0f)
Lawdy, lawdy. They look so happy.
:lol:
Yeah, that's about right.
I should have left the music on. I might have gotten a song.
Some get a kick from cocaine.
I had an update with screenshots, showing Kearny the Magnificent smashing Lee in Virginia, Grant turning Tennessee into the graveyard of the Confederacy and Lyon catching and annihilating Sterling Price in an epic year long hunt in the Trans-Mississippi. And Ambrose Burnside bringing Louisana to heel in an epic amphibious operation.
But the cat ate them.
Did you ever get a new cat?
Quote from: Razgovory on March 16, 2015, 08:01:27 PM
Did you ever get a new cat?
A black one decided to adapt us by showing up and getting the girls to spoil him.
That's good.
Does it have a name? Uncle Tom?
Finished the confederacy off in 1864, with Sherman taking the rebel capital in Atlanta and Kearny smashing into the Carolinas.
The retard camp in Pittsburgh contained the following generals:
Banks
Butler
Fremont
Pope
McClearnd. Or however you spell it.
Screenshots were eaten by a grue.
I send McClernand and Banks off to big cities since they add recruits each turn.
I was sending them to the city with the shittiest people.
I shoulda have sent them to Chicago then. :blush: