{AAR} Ed's short attention span theatre.

[FunkMonk]

I'm from Anatolia, and I saw kill em all!

Saw-killing is very Anatolian.  Remember "I came, I sawed, I conquered"?

[Ed Anger]

The 2nd Crusade

The Assassins join the cause. ALLAH ACKBAR



The 1st wave arrives. Mostly Eastern European trash. Our tires were stolen and they gave us TB.







Oh Well. I couldn't bring the power of the Caliph to fully bear on the degenerate Romans.



The battle of whatchamacallit:





Enough of that Eastern European trash.

OOOOOO! The knights come. HERE COMES ORLANDO BLOOM



The Heir to the throne brings the full power of this fully operational battlestation to bear:



ITS A TRAP!



And the Pope loses the will to fight. Fuck you Pope



The plan for the rest of the century is to do Ramadans to reduce decadence and capital improvements to Cairo to increase the demesne levy. ALLAH ACKBAR

[Martinus]

I just found this thread.

Btw, they really should have used a muslim calendar when you are playing a muslim.

[Ed Anger]

AAR, Part whatever. WHAT THE FUCK edition

So, I decide to bring the Atef back within the fold. BY FIRE AND SWORD



The mamluks quickly assfuck them and I give the emirate to a son. Time to work the decadance down.



NOT LIKE THIS THOUGH. SWEET JESUS.



Okay, I've fought the empire and the Pope. How hard is this goi-



OH FUCK ME. 70,000 MEN? OH COME ON.

[The Brain]

Glorious.

[Tamas]

How did you manage to max out your decadence?

[Ed Anger]

How did you manage to max out your decadence?

Too many Fatimids staying loyal and not getting their heads chopped off. A couple of princes were good boys and I left them alone. They bred a shit load of mini-towelheads and I think that brought it up. Also during the civil war, I was too busy trying to put it down.

Prince Osama of the Sinai and Prince Saladin of Axum.

[Tamas]

what happens now? game over? or you will become a vassal of those tribal fellows?

[Ed Anger]

Gonna fight the war. Hilariously, the full called up levy is only 50-60K. 

Plus 7000 Mamulks who have become the Praetorian Guard of the dynasty. A Fatimid player might as well keep them hired full time.

[Faeelin]

Do those guys suffer attrition?

[FunkMonk]

Game trolled you hard. 

[Ed Anger]

Game trolled you hard. 

I'm sorta dreading loading the save game later. 

[Habbaku]

Even if they don't suffer attrition, you should be able to whittle them down over time.  You'll be sorely weakened by the war, no doubt, but it's not insurmountable.

[Ed Anger]

It appears I didn't save the game after taking those screenshots. I SHOT JR.

[The Brain]

FFS