{AAR} Ed's short attention span theatre.

[Razgovory]

Ewwww, it looks like an AGEOD game.

[The Brain]

Party squable sucks. 

[Ed Anger]

I finally figured out how to build units. Hyuk hyuk hyuk.

[Syt]

Sulla v Marius

First off, the scenario starts with the Pontic dickfaces acting all tough, along with their Greek buttbuddies. So I send Sulla in and teach those motherfuckers a lesson:

Hey Marius, leave me the fuck alone. You greedy fuck.

I send Lettowicus to sell some slaves:

Mithradick decides he wants to play. Fuck you, you Asiatic piece of shit:

He limps off and invades Albania. Enjoy getting your hubcaps stolen. While he plays there, I decide to get this dog and pony show on the road and go take Athens:

Enjoy the sack, you Greek pieces of shit.

"I sense a lot of anger. And hostility."

[Ed Anger]

If you play as Sulla, you should play angry. Old fuckface Marius tries to remove your command? asiatic barbarian kills 80000 fellow Romans in Asia? populares going after your faction?

I'd be angry too. KILL

[Ed Anger]

Quick update(no screens):

Sulla crosses into Asia Minor. After taking some cities, the Pontic AI offers peace. I accept. Sulla gets a fleet and cash.

Lucullus collects the Roman fleet, the fleet of Rhodes and the freebies and brings Sully and a butt load of Legions to Italy. Pompey and Crassus fire in an event, giving me more stuff. Sully marches on Rome, blasts a Marian army to hell and quickly besiege and assaults Rome.

Marius' corpse is dug up and raped by dogs.

Learning scenario over. Up next: Year of the Four Emperors. As Otho. Should be hilarious.

[Ed Anger]

[Valmy]

Quick update(no screens):

Sulla crosses into Asia Minor. After taking some cities, the Pontic AI offers peace. I accept. Sulla gets a fleet and cash.

Lucullus collects the Roman fleet, the fleet of Rhodes and the freebies and brings Sully and a butt load of Legions to Italy. Pompey and Crassus fire in an event, giving me more stuff. Sully marches on Rome, blasts a Marian army to hell and quickly besiege and assaults Rome.

Marius' corpse is dug up and raped by dogs.

Learning scenario over. Up next: Year of the Four Emperors. As Otho. Should be hilarious.

'Ah yes finally Emperor as fortold.  Guess I should look through Galba's paperwork a bit and...wait what's this?  Rhine Legions in revolt and headed this way?  Fuck.'

[Ed Anger]

I took a glance at Otho's starting position:

He's Fucked

No legions are available to be raised. Just a gladiator unit and some Roman Marines. Plus Auxiliaries.

Totally fucked.

[garbon]

I mean he was barely an emperor.

[PDH]

Remember to leave a nice looking corpse.

[Ed Anger]

Vitellius might eat it.

[Valmy]

I took a glance at Otho's starting position:

He's Fucked

No legions are available to be raised. Just a gladiator unit and some Roman Marines. Plus Auxiliaries.

Totally fucked.

Mark Antony's Great-Grandson has the Danube Legions and historically was coming to help.  You just have to hold out until he shows up and you have a chance.

[Ed Anger]

Yeah. Right. I'm going down in flames.

[PDH]

Remember, cover yourself with barbecue sauce before you stab yourself.