Poll
Question:
What would be the first thing you do?
Option 1: Kill somebody
votes: 1
Option 2: Screw an ancestor
votes: 1
Option 3: Screw a historical figure
votes: 2
Option 4: Have a heart-to-heart with your past self
votes: 10
Option 5: Some kind of money-making scheme
votes: 12
Option 6: Just be an "observer", like a wimp
votes: 2
Option 7: Avoid using time travel, like an even bigger wimp
votes: 1
Option 8: Screw the past, I'm going to the future!
votes: 6
Option 9: Convince Jaron's mom to have an abortion
votes: 1
Option 10: Something completely different
votes: 3
TBR SANCTITY OMG
"Screw an ancestor"? What the hell, dude.
Monies. After that, probably trying to gain some kind of knowledge useful for my actual self.
L.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 02, 2014, 04:15:30 PM
"Screw an ancestor"? What the hell, dude.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.ytimg.com%2Fvi%2F4gbxJ2XgOoE%2Fhqdefault.jpg&hash=1aa29cceef4940552c6f5183534c928d3884d6e6)
Fuck Hitler.
Just cause you can travel in the past doesn't mean that somebody famous would want to screw you.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 02, 2014, 04:09:58 PM
TBR SANCTITY OMG
And you didn't even put in my Quantum Leap joke.
I killed JFK in order to mess with conspiracy theorits. :)
:unsure:
I mean that's what I would do if I had a time machine; which I do not.
But you did?
As much fun as it would be to experience more racism and hatred of homosexuals in the past, I'll pass.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 02, 2014, 04:18:22 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 02, 2014, 04:15:30 PM
"Screw an ancestor"? What the hell, dude.
***Futurama pic***
Not a
Futurama fan. I find it pedantic and pedestrian. Translate to
Family Guy, please.
I think about the money-making thing all the time :ph34r:
Quote from: derspiess on October 02, 2014, 04:29:35 PM
I think about the money-making thing all the time :ph34r:
Just think what you could accomplish if you put your energies towards realistic schemes.
I doubt anyone from the past would believe you if you said you were from the future, so trying to convince famous people to do stuff would be difficult.
So I think the H2H with me would be a better idea. There are some pretty important things I would say. I'd also just drop young MIM some stock charts.
Quote from: Savonarola on October 02, 2014, 04:25:17 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 02, 2014, 04:09:58 PM
TBR SANCTITY OMG
And you didn't even put in my Quantum Leap joke.
I killed JFK in order to mess with conspiracy theorits. :)
:unsure:
I mean that's what I would do if I had a time machine; which I do not.
I prefer the Red Dwarf version, in which a time travelling JFK was behind the grassy knoll and shot himself. -_-
As an amusing aside... my parents took a trip to Dallas maybe tenyears ago, in part to visit an aunt but also just to see Texas. One of the places they checked out was the Texas book depository. My dad being weird, he took some grass clippings from the grassy knoll.
When they flew through customs, they got extra special attention from customs. Their bags were turned inside out, but of course they didn't find anything. Eventually in frustration the border guard asks them "so where is it - the stewardess overheard you talking about making sure the grass was safe".
Going to Dallas on vacation: :bleeding:
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 02, 2014, 04:31:22 PM
I doubt anyone from the past would believe you if you said you were from the future, so trying to convince famous people to do stuff would be difficult.
OTOH, it might be easier to score with Norma Jean than Marilyn.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 02, 2014, 04:34:29 PM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 02, 2014, 04:31:22 PM
I doubt anyone from the past would believe you if you said you were from the future, so trying to convince famous people to do stuff would be difficult.
OTOH, it might be easier to score with Norma Jean than Marilyn.
Dangling a pill bottle is such hard work. :rolleyes:
About Time was a great movie about this
Quote from: garbon on October 02, 2014, 04:33:35 PM
Going to Dallas on vacation: :bleeding:
Said aunt is loaded. Husband made a lot of money in oil. :ph34r:
Quote from: Barrister on October 02, 2014, 04:36:08 PM
Quote from: garbon on October 02, 2014, 04:33:35 PM
Going to Dallas on vacation: :bleeding:
Said aunt is loaded. Husband made a lot of money in oil. :ph34r:
So she should have taken them elsewhere with her loaded ass.
Quote from: crazy canuck on October 02, 2014, 04:35:47 PM
About Time was a great movie about this
I don't know that it was a great movie about time travel (as that was pretty much all nonsensical) but I agree it was a great movie that had time travel in it.
I'd stop myself from telling DGuller any secrets. :(
Quote from: mongers on October 02, 2014, 04:22:21 PM
Destroy the return key on every keyboard Tim has ever come into contact with.
Quote from: garbon on October 02, 2014, 04:31:18 PM
Just think what you could accomplish if you put your energies towards realistic schemes.
I don't sit around and actively think about it-- just one of those weird things that pops into my head fairly frequently.
On second thought I'd go to the future and become King of the Morlocks.
Eloi, it's what's for dinner.
Quote from: mongers on October 02, 2014, 04:44:34 PM
Quote from: mongers on October 02, 2014, 04:22:21 PM
Destroy the return key on every keyboard Tim has ever come into contact with.
What would this accomplish?
mongers really hates paragraphing.
Quote from: The Brain on October 02, 2014, 04:42:52 PM
Quote from: alfred russel on October 02, 2014, 04:39:52 PM
I'd stop myself from telling DGuller any secrets. :(
How?
Look up "Corpus Callosotomy." http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corpus_callosotomy (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corpus_callosotomy)
Quote from: The Brain on October 02, 2014, 04:42:52 PM
Quote from: alfred russel on October 02, 2014, 04:39:52 PM
I'd stop myself from telling DGuller any secrets. :(
How?
I would remind me that DGuller is Russian and can't be trusted with secrets? :P
I would kick my own ass till I stopped being so stupid.
I think Kelly Clarkson is the greatest recording artist in the history of recording artists.
Quote from: Siege on October 03, 2014, 01:30:57 AM
I think Kelly Clarkson is the greatest recording artist in the history of recording artists.
So you'd go back to prevent the head trauma that led you to feel this way?
Quote from: Siege on October 03, 2014, 01:30:57 AM
I think Kelly Clarkson is the greatest recording artist in the history of recording artists.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2F8JHJJmC.gif&hash=f492ce89a6efc8b757a86c70efeccd74031c52f5)
I'm traumatized.
There is this kid, the son of a village elder, which I caught out breaking the 2300 curfew, with a pellet gun hunting at night time, and I did not take the shot, because he was just a kid with a pellet gun hunting, even though this was enough for PID, and now, 7 years later, he is with ISIS killing my kurdish friends.
Quote from: Siege on October 03, 2014, 01:30:57 AM
I think Kelly Clarkson is the greatest recording artist in the history of recording artists.
I see I've already gotten my first subject. :)
Quote from: Siege on October 03, 2014, 02:21:36 AM
I'm traumatized.
There is this kid, the son of a village elder, which I caught out breaking the 2300 curfew, with a pellet gun hunting at night time, and I did not take the shot, because he was just a kid with a pellet gun hunting, even though this was enough for PID, and now, 7 years later, he is with ISIS killing my kurdish friends.
wait, you have Muslim friends?
Quote from: HVC on October 03, 2014, 08:52:22 AM
Quote from: Siege on October 03, 2014, 02:21:36 AM
I'm traumatized.
There is this kid, the son of a village elder, which I caught out breaking the 2300 curfew, with a pellet gun hunting at night time, and I did not take the shot, because he was just a kid with a pellet gun hunting, even though this was enough for PID, and now, 7 years later, he is with ISIS killing my kurdish friends.
wait, you have Muslim friends?
Damn, I like Seigy too much to post my sarky, but for me mildly amusing joke. :(
Quote from: Siege on October 03, 2014, 02:21:36 AM
I'm traumatized.
There is this kid, the son of a village elder, which I caught out breaking the 2300 curfew, with a pellet gun hunting at night time, and I did not take the shot, because he was just a kid with a pellet gun hunting, even though this was enough for PID, and now, 7 years later, he is with ISIS killing my kurdish friends.
...how do you know? Are you still in contact with him? Are you on the same anti-western jihad mailing list?
If I could go back in time I would convince my younger self to continue to buy land in Vancouver and ignore completely all the talk about a certain collapse in property value.
I'm sure if you spent a couple minutes looking you could find stocks that far outpaced the Vancouver real estate market.
Quote from: crazy canuck on October 03, 2014, 02:34:42 PM
If I could go back in time I would convince my younger self to continue to buy land in Vancouver and ignore completely all the talk about a certain collapse in property value.
Perhaps you should wait for your older self to show up and tell you when it crashes.
If You Could Go Back in Time
Wasn't this a T'Pau song? :80sfrizzybighairsmilie:
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 03, 2014, 02:43:13 PM
I'm sure if you spent a couple minutes looking you could find stocks that far outpaced the Vancouver real estate market.
Yeah, but it would be more fun to continually tell Yi that waiting for a crash that has been predicted for about 30 years is a bad thing - and have all the extra property assets to back it up.
I'd tell my younger self circa 1991 or so to go buy as much Bre-X stock as I could get my hands on. And be sure to sell it off in 1996.
Then invest in, I dunno, Amazon, but be sure to sell off by 1999 or so.
Then hold off until 2001 and buy Apple stock.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 03, 2014, 02:43:13 PM
I'm sure if you spent a couple minutes looking you could find stocks that far outpaced the Vancouver real estate market.
What's that quote about investing in land, as they're no longer making it. ?
Quote from: Barrister on October 03, 2014, 03:22:19 PM
I'd tell my younger self circa 1991 or so to go buy as much Bre-X stock as I could get my hands on. And be sure to sell it off in 1996.
What's Bre-X?
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 03, 2014, 03:26:31 PM
Quote from: Barrister on October 03, 2014, 03:22:19 PM
I'd tell my younger self circa 1991 or so to go buy as much Bre-X stock as I could get my hands on. And be sure to sell it off in 1996.
What's Bre-X?
Penny mining stock that peaked at a share price of several hundred dollars.
Turned out to be an enormous fraud based on spiked core samples. Huge scandal up here in Canuckistan at the time. But if you're after a stock that would give you the greatest % increase that's probably your best bet.
Quote from: Barrister on October 03, 2014, 03:28:42 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 03, 2014, 03:26:31 PM
Quote from: Barrister on October 03, 2014, 03:22:19 PM
I'd tell my younger self circa 1991 or so to go buy as much Bre-X stock as I could get my hands on. And be sure to sell it off in 1996.
What's Bre-X?
Penny mining stock that peaked at a share price of several hundred dollars.
Turned out to be an enormous fraud based on spiked core samples. Huge scandal up here in Canuckistan at the time. But if you're after a stock that would give you the greatest % increase that's probably your best bet.
Yeah, the irony is they probably would have gotten away with it if it hadnt gotten so big. Pretty easy to explain a penny stock that goes bust after further exploration doesnt prove out the initial findings. But they got big enough to make it onto the big board and all the regulatory filings that go with that.
Quote from: mongers on October 03, 2014, 03:23:04 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 03, 2014, 02:43:13 PM
I'm sure if you spent a couple minutes looking you could find stocks that far outpaced the Vancouver real estate market.
What's that quote about investing in land, as they're no longer making it. ?
An owner-occupied single family home is not an investment. It's a cost. Well, for the owner anyway.
Quote from: mongers on October 03, 2014, 03:23:04 PM
What's that quote about investing in land, as they're no longer making it. ?
Land prices will go up in the long run, but it's a slow process. Stocks may go up or down, but if you have a time machine you should know which one. :P
Quote from: mongers on October 03, 2014, 03:03:55 PM
If You Could Go Back in Time
Wasn't this a T'Pau song? :80sfrizzybighairsmilie:
It's almost a Cher song.
Quote from: Tonitrus on October 03, 2014, 04:48:48 PM
Quote from: mongers on October 03, 2014, 03:03:55 PM
If You Could Go Back in Time
Wasn't this a T'Pau song? :80sfrizzybighairsmilie:
It's almost a Cher song.
Yeah I think it's that, the fizzy ginger/red hair led me to confuse them. :Embarrass:
Wasn't the Cher song 'If I Could Turn Back Time' ?
Quote from: mongers on October 03, 2014, 05:07:49 PM
Quote from: Tonitrus on October 03, 2014, 04:48:48 PM
Quote from: mongers on October 03, 2014, 03:03:55 PM
If You Could Go Back in Time
Wasn't this a T'Pau song? :80sfrizzybighairsmilie:
It's almost a Cher song.
Yeah I think it's that, the fizzy ginger/red hair led me to confuse them. :Embarrass:
Wasn't the Cher song 'If I Could Turn Back Time' ?
Aye
Killing Hitler's so cliche -- me, I'd tip off Röhm. :ph34r: And history would always recall the Night of the Small Dull Knives, the failed purged that forced Hitler to flee to Latin America as the gay drunken left wing of the NSDAP assumed power.
I would go back in time and get Franz Ferdinand's driver a better map of Sarajevo.
Quote from: Capetan Mihali on October 03, 2014, 06:28:55 PM
Killing Hitler's so cliche -- me, I'd tip off Röhm. :ph34r: And history would always recall the Night of the Small Dull Knives, the failed purged that forced Hitler to flee to Latin America as the gay drunken left wing of the NSDAP assumed power.
You're so godsdam hot!
G.
Oh.. the question at hand!
Prevent Caesar from being murdered of course! He'd' have quickly rolled up Parthia - created the empire sooner - established the basis of a hereditary monarchy and made Rome all the more secure.
G.
Buy a Buick.
What? I want to travel back to California circa 1955.
Future. Given the changes between 1950 and 2000, let alone 1900 and 2000, it'd be interesting to head a hundred years off and see how much is still recognizable.
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 03, 2014, 03:26:31 PM
Quote from: Barrister on October 03, 2014, 03:22:19 PM
I'd tell my younger self circa 1991 or so to go buy as much Bre-X stock as I could get my hands on. And be sure to sell it off in 1996.
What's Bre-X?
Canadian mining company that exploded based on some gold they allegedly found. It turns out that they fraudulently salted their samples with gold to attract investors.
Quote from: Grallon on October 03, 2014, 08:36:54 PM
Prevent Caesar from being murdered of course! He'd' have quickly rolled up Parthia - created the empire sooner - established the basis of a hereditary monarchy and made Rome all the more secure.
I suppose since you've got a time machine it wouldn't matter to you that the West would advance as slowly as China did historically and life in 2014 would still be nasty, brutish and short.
Quote from: DontSayBanana on October 03, 2014, 09:37:31 PM
Future. Given the changes between 1950 and 2000, let alone 1900 and 2000, it'd be interesting to head a hundred years off and see how much is still recognizable.
You know that you can't actually go back to the future?
Quote from: Neil on October 03, 2014, 10:31:25 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 03, 2014, 03:26:31 PM
Quote from: Barrister on October 03, 2014, 03:22:19 PM
I'd tell my younger self circa 1991 or so to go buy as much Bre-X stock as I could get my hands on. And be sure to sell it off in 1996.
What's Bre-X?
Canadian mining company that exploded based on some gold they allegedly found. It turns out that they fraudulently salted their samples with gold to attract investors.
So Beeb is suggesting he wishes more than anything to commit trans-temporal white-collar crime?
How is that white collar crime?
Time-insider trading?
Quote from: Capetan Mihali on October 04, 2014, 12:08:50 PM
Time-insider trading?
I'm not an insider of Bre-X. :contract:
You're an insider of the present, with insider knowledge of their ongoing fraud during the hypothetical money-making period. Perhaps it ought to be more expected for someone such as yourself to say "I wish I could go back in time and blow the whistle on Bre-X," even while indulging in the "tell 1992 me to buy e.g. Microsoft stock" fantasy.
I think the moral issue Mihalia is getting at is that when you unload your Bre-X shares you would be knowingly selling something worthless.
But the flip side of that argument is, if you did the Apple or Microsoft play instead, you would be paying someone a fraction of what you know the true value of their shares to be.
So shouldn't both plays be considered immoral, or neither?
Philosophize THAT philosopher boy. :yeah:
Quote from: Capetan Mihali on October 04, 2014, 01:04:08 PM
You're an insider of the present, with insider knowledge of their ongoing fraud during the hypothetical money-making period. Perhaps it ought to be more expected for someone such as yourself to say "I wish I could go back in time and blow the whistle on Bre-X," even while indulging in the "tell 1992 me to buy e.g. Microsoft stock" fantasy.
Betting the spread on every NFL championship and Super Bowl from 1960 would be a lot easier and guilt-free. Hell, betting it all on Namath would put a hell of a dent in organized crime. And you'd let Yi sleep better at night doing it that way than fucking over Faceless Megacorporation, Inc.
Selling a worthless stock is not fucking over Faceless Megacorp.
I really wish you were a bit less retarded some times.
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 04, 2014, 01:12:03 PM
But the flip side of that argument is, if you did the Apple or Microsoft play instead, you would be paying someone a fraction of what you know the true value of their shares to be.
That's not quite true, since the actions that cause the share prices to rise haven't been taken yet.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 04, 2014, 01:51:21 PM
That's not quite true, since the actions that cause the share prices to rise haven't been taken yet.
Now that's what I call philosophizing.
Quote from: Capetan Mihali on October 04, 2014, 01:04:08 PM
You're an insider of the present, with insider knowledge of their ongoing fraud during the hypothetical money-making period. Perhaps it ought to be more expected for someone such as yourself to say "I wish I could go back in time and blow the whistle on Bre-X," even while indulging in the "tell 1992 me to buy e.g. Microsoft stock" fantasy.
Don't worry, when CNBC does the profile on "Unknown Investor buys Bre-X for pennies and sells all at the height" for countless millions just before the stock goes bust for fraud, the federal investigators will be asking him some questions.
He better keep the returns modest and not go for the Warren Buffet levels. :P
QuoteBetting the spread on every NFL championship and Super Bowl from 1960 would be a lot easier and guilt-free. Hell, betting it all on Namath would put a hell of a dent in organized crime. And you'd let Yi sleep better at night doing it that way than fucking over Faceless Megacorporation, Inc.
CdM wants to be Biff Tannen. :(
I'm assuming the historical figure will just agree? It seems a wasted to trip to go back in time to awkwardly hit on Antinous.
Being unable to speak German seems to torpedo my chances with Empress Elizabeth
Is this time travel method confirmed to be paradox free?
Brain would go back for Catherine's horse.
ONE CLOP FOR YES
Quote from: Valmy on October 04, 2014, 07:29:32 PM
Being unable to speak German seems to torpedo my chances with Empress Elizabeth
Go back earlier than her time and learn the language. :P
Playing to my strengths in the time-travelling boning game, there was a legendary courtesan back at the French Belle Epoque,
La Belle Otero, who hailed from my region, and was apparently the shit at the courtesan leagues. So, brushing up my French and befriending her I could see myself mingling in Paris during the late XIXth, early XXth centuries, hanging around with the Folies Bergère dancers, downing absinthe with the impressionists, mingling in the pre WWI spy games, witnessing the arrival of modernity...interesting times!
If I wanted to make a killing financially during these times I guess that I could always buy paintings from the impoverished impressionists and post-impressionists for peanuts, or join forces with a Gulbenkian kind of guy, exploiting turn of the century geopolitics to my advantage. :ph34r:
I'd go back and jack off into the primordial ooze.
Quote from: Valmy on October 04, 2014, 07:29:32 PM
Being unable to speak German seems to torpedo my chances with Empress Elizabeth
Wir können dich mit das helfen. :contract:
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 04, 2014, 09:27:14 PM
I'd go back and jack off into the primordial ooze.
You'd still end up with fewer kids.
Quote from: Capetan Mihali on October 04, 2014, 01:04:08 PM
You're an insider of the present, with insider knowledge of their ongoing fraud during the hypothetical money-making period. Perhaps it ought to be more expected for someone such as yourself to say "I wish I could go back in time and blow the whistle on Bre-X," even while indulging in the "tell 1992 me to buy e.g. Microsoft stock" fantasy.
Who the hell is going to listen to 17 year old me claiming "Bre-X is nothing but a giant fraud!"
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 04, 2014, 01:49:28 PM
Selling a worthless stock is not fucking over Faceless Megacorp.
I really wish you were a bit less retarded some times.
And indeed many innocent people were fucked over by Bre-X. Though honestly even at the time people were saying Bre-X was wildly over-valued. Nobody expected it to go to zero so quickly, but it was still a wildly speculative play.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 02, 2014, 04:09:58 PM
TBR SANCTITY OMG
A mixture of #1 and "some kind of money making scheme".