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General Category => Off the Record => Topic started by: jimmy olsen on March 26, 2010, 01:49:16 AM

Title: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: jimmy olsen on March 26, 2010, 01:49:16 AM
A discovery of this magnitude will revolutionize psychology. This study was worth every dime and then some.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/livescience/20100325/sc_livescience/bulliespickonunpopularkidsstudyfinds
Quote
Bullies Pick on Unpopular Kids, Study Finds

livescience.com – Thu Mar 25, 7:59 am ET

Bullies choose their victims wisely, targeting kids who are unpopular and less likely to be defended by their peers, a new study finds.

And in elementary school, which this study focused on, kids are only interested in what their same-gender peers think. So boys will target classmates who are not well-liked by other boys, regardless of what the girls think.

Past research has shown that gays and lesbians as well as those who are socially awkward are more likely to be victims of bullying.

The new finding that bullies are so strategic in their affairs means eradicating the behavior will take a savvy program, said lead researcher Rene Veenstra, professor of sociology at the University of Groningen. While the study was based in the Netherlands, Veenstra said there's no reason the results shouldn't apply to the United States and elsewhere.

The results, which are detailed in the March/April 2010 issue of the journal Child Development, have implications for reducing bullying. An estimated 15 percent of kids around the globe are victims of bullying which can lead to depression, anxiety, loneliness and other negative consequences, the researchers say.

Bullies also have grim outcomes, with research showing in the long-run they have more substance abuse problems and higher levels of delinquency, Veenstra said.

Who's who in the classroom

Veenstra and his colleagues had about 480 students, average age of 10.5 years, from 26 different Dutch elementary schools answer questionnaires about their classmates.

The students noted which kids were their friends, those they disliked and who bullied whom. For instance, students indicated whether they themselves or others were victims or instigators of different forms of bully behavior and victimization, such as: excluding or ignoring; calling names or laughing; hitting, kicking, or pinching; taking things; throwing things.

Both boys and girls were more likely to accept same-gender classmates than other-gender classmates. And boys were more often nominated than girls as perpetrators of bullying toward both boys and girls.

"They aren't interested in the opinion to the whole classroom, only those in their in-group," Veenstra told LiveScience. "In elementary school the in-group is often people from the same sex. Boys are interested in the opinion of other boys in whether they choose the right target or not, and girls are interested in what other girls think."

Bullies tended to target same-gender individuals who were rejected by and had low acceptance from their same-gender classmates. So when boys bully boys, it didn't matter whether girls approved or disapproved. The same went for girl bullies.

In that way the bullies could gain status by dominating other kids while also stay in the good graces of the in-group.

When they did taunt girls, boys chose victims who weren't well-liked by other boys, regardless of the victim's status among girls. Girls did the same in their bullying of boys. But there was one caveat. While male bullies were never rated low on acceptance by male or female peers, when girls bullied boys they were more rejected by both genders. The researchers aren't sure the reason for the gender difference.

Complex behavior

Veenstra paints a picture of bullying as a strategic affair involving more than just the bully and victim. For instance, assistants help out the bully, while defendants help the victim, and bystanders stand on the sidelines.

"Bullies do it so strategically that if there is not a good program at the school nothing will change. They won't change their behavior by themselves, because it gives them a lot of advantages," he said. "You really need a good program that changes the attitude of all the kids in the classroom that makes clear to children that if they want the bully to stop they all have to be part, take joint action."

He added, "They have to understand if they assist or reinforce the bully or are just bystanders that is what drives the bullying."

Those who want to nip bullying behavior in the bud should also take gender into account.

"To understand the complex nature of acceptance and rejection, it's necessary to distinguish the gender of the bully, the gender of the target, and the gender of the classmates who accept and reject bullies and victims," Veenstra said.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Josquius on March 26, 2010, 06:33:20 AM
Sure makes me feel better about the research I'm doing.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: jimmy olsen on March 26, 2010, 07:33:42 AM
Quote from: Tyr on March 26, 2010, 06:33:20 AM
Sure makes me feel better about the research I'm doing.
Which is?
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Ed Anger on March 26, 2010, 08:37:37 AM
Being drunk
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: HVC on March 26, 2010, 09:41:29 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 26, 2010, 08:37:37 AM
Being drunk
Sometimes that can be fulfilling research
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: derspiess on March 26, 2010, 10:48:51 AM
Bullies FTW.  They help keep self-esteem in check.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: BuddhaRhubarb on March 26, 2010, 11:31:12 AM
:lol: I sincerely hope that lots of tax dollars went into that study.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 26, 2010, 11:44:30 AM
QuoteWhile male bullies were never rated low on acceptance by male or female peers, when girls bullied boys they were more rejected by both genders. The researchers aren't sure the reason for the gender difference.

Duh. Noone likes a bitch.  :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: BuddhaRhubarb on March 26, 2010, 11:48:53 AM
hmmm thinking back I was both popular and bullied. (the drawback to being a popular fat kid, you get bullied when there are no weaker thans around) Once again I fail to be part of the demographic. :p
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Grey Fox on March 26, 2010, 11:50:41 AM
First 3 grades, I was a bully.

All subsequent grades I was semi-bullied, left alone.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Drakken on March 26, 2010, 12:18:16 PM
Quote from: Grey Fox on March 26, 2010, 11:50:41 AM
First 3 grades, I was a bully.

All subsequent grades I was semi-bullied, left alone.

It finally stopped in high school when, in the same day:

A) I repeatedly punched a younger bully, twice my size, in his eye socket until it got bloodied and permanently damaged in front of everyone. After telling him four times to stop picking off my earphones out of my ears. Fuck the unwritten rules, I wanted to beat the snot out of him.

B) I got patted in the back by my principal for doing so because I was obviously provoked (who suspended me nonetheless but without any due work, basically giving me one more day of break).

C) A bigger bully later tried to diss me in the middle of a class for assaulting the above bully, and I coolly threatened to break every single chair in the class on his back and face if he didn't back off, until either he died or all the chairs were broken, and I reached for the nearest chair. Luckily for him (and for me), he backed off and immediately played the Beta.  I was so enraged that day, I would have actually done it.

After that, I was left alone.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Eddie Teach on March 26, 2010, 12:30:11 PM
That sounds like something out of a bad movie.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Drakken on March 26, 2010, 12:32:23 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 26, 2010, 12:30:11 PM
That sounds like something out of a bad movie.

This sounds like the movie Three O'Clock High, except that I wasn't actually running away from the bully, but wanting to sadistically maim him.  :lol:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Syt on March 26, 2010, 12:44:15 PM
Is Drakken: Walter Kovacs?
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: lustindarkness on March 26, 2010, 12:46:35 PM
Nice, another chance to share my favorite bully story. In elementary I went to a big private school that went all the way to high school. This school was across the street from the beach and the playground had a few coconut palm trees. I was in 6th grade and some highschooler decided to try and bully me, he pushed me, I grabbed a coconut and smashed him in the mouth, braces through the lips and much blood and screaming and later an ambulance. I sure got in trouble and almost expelled, but no one ever bothered me in that school ever again. :)
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:46:58 PM
Is that what the seduction community teaches? Tell stories full of bravado?
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:47:41 PM
Quote from: Martinus on March 26, 2010, 11:44:30 AM
Duh. Noone likes a bitch.  :rolleyes:

Not true. <_<
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:48:36 PM
Quote from: HVC on March 26, 2010, 09:41:29 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 26, 2010, 08:37:37 AM
Being drunk
Sometimes that can be fulfilling research

Until you vomit. :(
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 26, 2010, 01:16:30 PM
I wasn't a popular child in primary school, and found school perfectly miserable until grade 7 or so (mostly becase I did not like the other kids and they did not like me - looking back on it, probably more my fault then theirs), but I don't recall much in the way of actual physical bullying. I was certainly never involved in smashing other kids in the face, or vice versa; nor did I see that happening to other kids.

I was always big and strong for my age, though.

Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: HVC on March 26, 2010, 01:35:18 PM
Quote from: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:48:36 PM
Quote from: HVC on March 26, 2010, 09:41:29 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 26, 2010, 08:37:37 AM
Being drunk
Sometimes that can be fulfilling research

Until you vomit. :(
you jsut have to spread the research out better :D
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 26, 2010, 02:14:56 PM
I had a bit of a weird status at primary school all things considered. I was not a popular kid and I was a geek (and the best student in the school to boot) and I was sometimes teased, but I wasn't really bullied (never was beaten or pushed or extorted or anything).

I was a "rich kid" (by my town's standards), and teachers liked me (but I wasn't a kiss up; in fact we often stirred up shit, e.g. I ran a non-official school newspaper and we decided to run a story by my buddy about pets in the biology lab being mistreated - there was such a shitstorm :D)

My best friend since about 3rd grade until today is a guy who was at the time an anarchist punk-rock single-mother kid who most people thought is "half-gypsy" (he is a bit dark skinned and I think his father may have been a Roma), who started as a playboy and is now a hippie polyanna-style fundie Christian. The rest of our gang included a guy who was really into dissecting frogs and constructing explosive devices, and later got into mind-altering substances and committed suicide last year; and a tech-oriented "girl king" guy, with a crazie fundie mother, who I found out recently now works for Exxon Mobile and lives with his boyfriend.

For some reason bullies left me alone and there was in fact some sort of mutual grudging respect/detente between us.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 26, 2010, 02:54:35 PM
Quote from: Martinus on March 26, 2010, 02:14:56 PM
I had a bit of a weird status at primary school all things considered. I was not a popular kid and I was a geek (and the best student in the school to boot) and I was sometimes teased, but I wasn't really bullied (never was beaten or pushed or extorted or anything).

I was a "rich kid" (by my town's standards), and teachers liked me (but I wasn't a kiss up; in fact we often stirred up shit, e.g. I ran a non-official school newspaper and we decided to run a story by my buddy about pets in the biology lab being mistreated - there was such a shitstorm :D)

My best friend since about 3rd grade until today is a guy who was at the time an anarchist punk-rock single-mother kid who most people thought is "half-gypsy" (he is a bit dark skinned and I think his father may have been a Roma), who started as a playboy and is now a hippie polyanna-style fundie Christian. The rest of our gang included a guy who was really into dissecting frogs and constructing explosive devices, and later got into mind-altering substances and committed suicide last year; and a tech-oriented "girl king" guy, with a crazie fundie mother, who I found out recently now works for Exxon Mobile and lives with his boyfriend.

For some reason bullies left me alone and there was in fact some sort of mutual grudging respect/detente between us.

That sounds more like what we would call 'juniour high' and 'high school' - grades 7-12. I associate "bullying" with younger kids - grades 1-6. Perhaps incorrectly.

In our case, by high school kids had split up into various tribes, and kid's energies were mostly tied up in gaining status within the 'tribe' they had chosen. sometimes this resulted in deadly emnity between various tribes, but more often in my experience at least it acted as a sort of peace-maker - if someone was in another 'tribe' you weren't competing at all with them for status, so you could interact on the basis of more or less "grudging respect".

The ironic thing at the time was that our "tribe" (as I suspect was yours) was composed of all sorts of eccentric misfits who would otherwise have had very low status. By forming their own tribe with its own status-structure, suddenly those who had high status *within the group* were of more or less equal status with the high-status kids in other groups. As high school progressed, for hetero guys at least a group had status if it was able to attract female members who were hot. Since our group had lots of artsie types and lots (and lots) of drugs, this wasn't a problem ... Hence the "mutual gruding respect" thing.

The "irony" enters in that we eccentric misfits types thought, naturally enough, that we were beyond all that status seeking bullshit, that we were too cool to care about that sort of thing and that this is why we were not tortured by anxiety about our social place. The reality was of course quite otherwise.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 26, 2010, 03:06:15 PM
Oh, in Poland at the time we had elementary school of grades 1-8, so what I wrote applies to ages 6 through 14.

After that I had 4 years of a "lyceaum" but that was a completely different experience, since you would have all the bullies and idiots go to professional schools at that point, so we got the brainiacs and the artsy types mostly, and people were just weird. :P

Now the system is more similar to the use one (there is a 6 year elementary school, then 4 year high school, then 3 years of the "lyceum" and then university).
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Drakken on March 26, 2010, 05:30:25 PM
Quote from: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:46:58 PM
Is that what the seduction community teaches? Tell stories full of bravado?

If it can reassure you, no gays were bashed that day... unless one of those two was still in the closet without my knowledge. :shifty:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Camerus on March 26, 2010, 07:51:05 PM
Quote from: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:46:58 PM
Is that what the seduction community teaches? Tell stories full of bravado?

"Demonstrate that you are a possible protector" and thus alpha.    :showoff:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: garbon on March 26, 2010, 09:55:29 PM
Quote from: Drakken on March 26, 2010, 05:30:25 PM
If it can reassure you, no gays were bashed that day... unless one of those two was still in the closet without my knowledge. :shifty:

Why would I care about that? :huh:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: garbon on March 26, 2010, 09:56:02 PM
Quote from: Pitiful Pathos on March 26, 2010, 07:51:05 PM
"Demonstrate that you are a possible protector" and thus alpha.    :showoff:

:D
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Eddie Teach on March 26, 2010, 11:47:36 PM
I never really noticed the cliques/ that seem to epitomize high school to Malthus and most Hollywood screen writers. People had their circles of friends, sure, but those groups were too small to form an outline of the whole school. Course, my school was big enough that I didn't know half the people in my class.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Jaron on March 26, 2010, 11:56:57 PM
Drakken can be the new Paul  :showoff:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: DisturbedPervert on March 27, 2010, 12:57:47 AM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 26, 2010, 11:47:36 PM
I never really noticed the cliques/ that seem to epitomize high school to Malthus and most Hollywood screen writers. People had their circles of friends, sure, but those groups were too small to form an outline of the whole school. Course, my school was big enough that I didn't know half the people in my class.

Yeah, that's how I remember it too.  The people I hung out with were mostly just the people I had classes with
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Razgovory on March 27, 2010, 02:19:37 AM
My school was pretty rough.  I got beat up a lot, but not as bad as some.  One kid had his nuts stomped so hard one of his testicles ruptured.  They also forced him down and pissed down his mouth.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 05:12:46 AM
Quote from: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:46:58 PM
Is that what the seduction community teaches? Tell stories full of bravado?

What the hell is a seduction community?

It sounds like a "How to get laid" self help book for nerds.  :huh:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 05:14:46 AM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 26, 2010, 11:47:36 PM
I never really noticed the cliques/ that seem to epitomize high school to Malthus and most Hollywood screen writers. People had their circles of friends, sure, but those groups were too small to form an outline of the whole school. Course, my school was big enough that I didn't know half the people in my class.

You are destroying yet another fixture of my American myth. :(

But you are not the only one who is saying that. I wonder why the "high school drama" is such a strong genre in American tv and movie productions.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 05:15:58 AM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 27, 2010, 02:19:37 AM
One kid had his nuts stomped so hard one of his testicles ruptured.  They also forced him down and pissed down his mouth.

Ouch. Sounds like a date gone bad.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Agelastus on March 27, 2010, 06:41:36 AM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 26, 2010, 11:47:36 PM
I never really noticed the cliques/ that seem to epitomize high school to Malthus and most Hollywood screen writers. People had their circles of friends, sure, but those groups were too small to form an outline of the whole school. Course, my school was big enough that I didn't know half the people in my class.

The cliques were noticeable at my senior school, and in terms of friendships and activities were probably more important than what House (Platt's, Garnes etc.) you were in. Fortunately, none of the cliques were united by such a pathetic common principal as "let's bully somebody" but rather by shared interests and personalities.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Razgovory on March 27, 2010, 06:50:48 AM
Quote from: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 05:15:58 AM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 27, 2010, 02:19:37 AM
One kid had his nuts stomped so hard one of his testicles ruptured.  They also forced him down and pissed down his mouth.

Ouch. Sounds like a date gone bad.

You'll like this, they did it because they thought he was gay.  Kids name was Kenny.  They took him out of school after that.  Homeschool or private school I guess.  Didn't see him again after that.

I got off easy, the worst someone did to me was break my arm.  Well I suppose that this kind of thing did lead somewhat to me going fucking nuts.  I still have nightmares about that shit.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Syt on March 27, 2010, 07:23:55 AM
Quote from: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 05:12:46 AM
Quote from: garbon on March 26, 2010, 12:46:58 PM
Is that what the seduction community teaches? Tell stories full of bravado?

What the hell is a seduction community?

It sounds like a "How to get laid" self help book for nerds.  :huh:

(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.nerve.com%2FCS%2Fblogs%2Fscanner%2F2008%2F04%2F23-End%2F293.cruise.magnolia.110707.jpg&hash=1a11cdfe09bc359a5f39218f09849a45309261c9)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seduction_community
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Lucidor on March 27, 2010, 07:39:04 AM
Quote from: Syt on March 27, 2010, 07:23:55 AM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seduction_community
That's funny.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Eddie Teach on March 27, 2010, 07:45:24 AM
QuoteMembers of the seduction community often practice approaching and opening repetitively; some have done thousands of approaches. Strauss describes a pickup artist who did 125 approaches in one day.[

So their secret apparently is "Keep trying and eventually you'll luck out."  :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Syt on March 27, 2010, 07:57:08 AM
Quote from: Lucidor on March 27, 2010, 07:39:04 AM
Quote from: Syt on March 27, 2010, 07:23:55 AM
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seduction_community
That's funny.

I think I read somewhere that David Faustino was part of the community. Apparently he had as much trouble finding women in real life as he had as Bud Bundy on Married With Children.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:01:06 AM
I find Married with Children about unwatchable now.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: The Brain on March 27, 2010, 08:08:18 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:01:06 AM
I find Married with Children about unwatchable now.

Move on from VHS, gramps.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:12:10 AM
Quote from: The Brain on March 27, 2010, 08:08:18 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:01:06 AM
I find Married with Children about unwatchable now.

Move on from VHS, gramps.

I'm still on Betamax and Laserdisc, you punk kid.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: ulmont on March 27, 2010, 08:14:54 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:12:10 AM
I'm still on Betamax and Laserdisc, you punk kid.

Laserdisc?  Luxury!  We had "videodiscs" or "CED"s (basically a video record player):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capacitance_Electronic_Disc
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:18:56 AM
Quote from: ulmont on March 27, 2010, 08:14:54 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:12:10 AM
I'm still on Betamax and Laserdisc, you punk kid.

Laserdisc?  Luxury!  We had "videodiscs" or "CED"s (basically a video record player):
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capacitance_Electronic_Disc

I don't even remember that format.  :blush:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Eddie Teach on March 27, 2010, 08:53:47 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on March 27, 2010, 08:01:06 AM
I find Married with Children about unwatchable now.

None of the sitcoms of that era have aged well.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 11:44:54 AM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 27, 2010, 06:50:48 AM
Quote from: Martinus on March 27, 2010, 05:15:58 AM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 27, 2010, 02:19:37 AM
One kid had his nuts stomped so hard one of his testicles ruptured.  They also forced him down and pissed down his mouth.

Ouch. Sounds like a date gone bad.

You'll like this, they did it because they thought he was gay.  Kids name was Kenny.  They took him out of school after that.  Homeschool or private school I guess.  Didn't see him again after that.

I got off easy, the worst someone did to me was break my arm.  Well I suppose that this kind of thing did lead somewhat to me going fucking nuts.  I still have nightmares about that shit.

Seriously, that's fucking nasty. I never heard of anything being that bullied. Jesus.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 28, 2010, 01:52:42 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 26, 2010, 11:47:36 PM
I never really noticed the cliques/ that seem to epitomize high school to Malthus and most Hollywood screen writers. People had their circles of friends, sure, but those groups were too small to form an outline of the whole school. Course, my school was big enough that I didn't know half the people in my class.

My school was huge - had more than 3,000 students in it. No-one knew everyone in their class.

I wouldn't say my experience was universal, but I think "circle of friends" and "cliques" are more or less interchangable terms in HS. At least, they were in mine.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Maximus on March 28, 2010, 02:20:21 PM
Quote from: Drakken on March 26, 2010, 12:18:16 PM
It finally stopped in high school when, in the same day:

A) I repeatedly punched a younger bully, twice my size, in his eye socket until it got bloodied and permanently damaged in front of everyone. After telling him four times to stop picking off my earphones out of my ears. Fuck the unwritten rules, I wanted to beat the snot out of him.

B) I got patted in the back by my principal for doing so because I was obviously provoked (who suspended me nonetheless but without any due work, basically giving me one more day of break).

C) A bigger bully later tried to diss me in the middle of a class for assaulting the above bully, and I coolly threatened to break every single chair in the class on his back and face if he didn't back off, until either he died or all the chairs were broken, and I reached for the nearest chair. Luckily for him (and for me), he backed off and immediately played the Beta.  I was so enraged that day, I would have actually done it.

After that, I was left alone.
Is that how you gained the respect of the yardies?
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Eddie Teach on March 28, 2010, 02:27:25 PM
Quote from: Malthus on March 28, 2010, 01:52:42 PM
My school was huge - had more than 3,000 students in it. No-one knew everyone in their class.

I wouldn't say my experience was universal, but I think "circle of friends" and "cliques" are more or less interchangable terms in HS. At least, they were in mine.

I didn't mean just the existence of cliques but the sort of social hierarchy you see in the movies- "over here you have the potheads, and over there the band geeks, and over there the 4h club." The reality was that people's groupings were much more random and fluid than that, and the most popular kids were the ones who were good-looking and friendly.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: ulmont on March 28, 2010, 02:45:38 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 28, 2010, 02:27:25 PM
I didn't mean just the existence of cliques but the sort of social hierarchy you see in the movies- "over here you have the potheads, and over there the band geeks, and over there the 4h club." The reality was that people's groupings were much more random and fluid than that, and the most popular kids were the ones who were good-looking and friendly.

While the groupings were somewhat more fluid, you could definitely pick out the potheads, the athletes, the college prep kids, the vo-tech kids, the band kids, etc.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 28, 2010, 02:50:51 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on March 28, 2010, 02:27:25 PM
Quote from: Malthus on March 28, 2010, 01:52:42 PM
My school was huge - had more than 3,000 students in it. No-one knew everyone in their class.

I wouldn't say my experience was universal, but I think "circle of friends" and "cliques" are more or less interchangable terms in HS. At least, they were in mine.

I didn't mean just the existence of cliques but the sort of social hierarchy you see in the movies- "over here you have the potheads, and over there the band geeks, and over there the 4h club." The reality was that people's groupings were much more random and fluid than that, and the most popular kids were the ones who were good-looking and friendly.

In my experience, certain 'tribes' were easily identifiable - based on a common pastime or taste in music - but many were not.

Certainly drug use was a major identifier. There were groups that used drugs and those that did not, and not much overlap between the two.

Having a very large school enabled just about anyone to find a group that they had at least something in common with. My point was that the groups were *not* arranged in a sort of hierarchy, with the "popular kids" at the top and the "geeks" at the bottom or whatever: indeed, if there was some sort of clique of "popular kids", we didn't even know who they were, or care.

What was important was your 'ranking' among your friends. In our group, where drug use was universal, that was at least in part established by your reputation for honesty and generosity with others - being thought stingy or unscrupulous in the constant small trades that are part and parcel of the druggie lifestyle was a status-killer. 
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: ulmont on March 28, 2010, 02:55:14 PM
Quote from: Malthus on March 28, 2010, 02:50:51 PMif there was some sort of clique of "popular kids", we didn't even know who they were, or care.

The "popular kids"  were easily identifiable.  College prep, all in the school choir or similar, children of the community leaders, etc.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martinus on March 28, 2010, 03:43:15 PM
Quote from: ulmont on March 28, 2010, 02:55:14 PM
children of the community leaders, etc.

That's curious. In Poland, such children are usually targeted for bullying rather than being popular.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Eddie Teach on March 28, 2010, 06:11:03 PM
Quote from: ulmont on March 28, 2010, 02:55:14 PM
The "popular kids"  were easily identifiable.  College prep, all in the school choir or similar, children of the community leaders, etc.

(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fyouritlist.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F01%2Fslushy.jpg&hash=d6747615c473f725bc7b1033973744f212bb0b84)
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Admiral Yi on March 28, 2010, 07:12:55 PM
I think Malthus is trying to tell us he was a high-ranking geek.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: crazy canuck on March 28, 2010, 09:01:07 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 28, 2010, 07:12:55 PM
I think Malthus is trying to tell us he was a high-ranking geek.

Who pretended not to care who the popular kids were.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Drakken on March 28, 2010, 11:04:43 PM
Quote from: Maximus on March 28, 2010, 02:20:21 PM
Quote from: Drakken on March 26, 2010, 12:18:16 PM
It finally stopped in high school when, in the same day:

A) I repeatedly punched a younger bully, twice my size, in his eye socket until it got bloodied and permanently damaged in front of everyone. After telling him four times to stop picking off my earphones out of my ears. Fuck the unwritten rules, I wanted to beat the snot out of him.

B) I got patted in the back by my principal for doing so because I was obviously provoked (who suspended me nonetheless but without any due work, basically giving me one more day of break).

C) A bigger bully later tried to diss me in the middle of a class for assaulting the above bully, and I coolly threatened to break every single chair in the class on his back and face if he didn't back off, until either he died or all the chairs were broken, and I reached for the nearest chair. Luckily for him (and for me), he backed off and immediately played the Beta.  I was so enraged that day, I would have actually done it.

After that, I was left alone.
Is that how you gained the respect of the yardies?

Nope, that's how I was finally left in peace.

Got a major depression after that, though, so I didn't profit from that peace until high school was over.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: HisMajestyBOB on March 28, 2010, 11:23:19 PM
I was never picked on in school. Was I: popular?
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Razgovory on March 28, 2010, 11:25:48 PM
Quote from: crazy canuck on March 28, 2010, 09:01:07 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 28, 2010, 07:12:55 PM
I think Malthus is trying to tell us he was a high-ranking geek.

Who pretended not to care who the popular kids were.

He might not have since he was stoned.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Martim Silva on March 29, 2010, 07:58:51 AM
Quote from: Drakken
It finally stopped in high school when, in the same day:

A) I repeatedly punched a younger bully, twice my size, in his eye socket until it got bloodied and permanently damaged in front of everyone. After telling him four times to stop picking off my earphones out of my ears. Fuck the unwritten rules, I wanted to beat the snot out of him.

Now learn from Drakken, THIS is how you get rid of bullies. Pass this on to your young ones: hit 'em. Hit 'em hard. Then hit 'em harder when they're down.

In my earliest school days, it was kind of hard to tell if there was any bullying going on: our breaks were usually spent in non-stop fighting, so I don't know which punches where thrown in bullying and which were just plain fun. All the similar-aged classes split into two large random buches and just smashed into each other.

(I always placed myself in the far left flank and made sure my side knew that I got dibs on the four guys in the opposite area facing us)

In high school, a big guy tried to bully me. I beat him up. Then I kinda took over class, and this remained so until I graduated from University (it was useful in university, as I could drink beer during classes).

In high school, I never felt like bullying anyone. It's just no sport to pick up on the weak.

I did once tried to dish out some Justice (once I beat the crap out of a guy I thought had done something wrong, but it seemed that he had been secretly scammed by the other guy and just wanted some payback), but then I decided to avoid taking that route. Too full of perils.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: DisturbedPervert on March 29, 2010, 09:10:30 AM
Bullying seemed much more of a middle and grade school thing from what I remember
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 29, 2010, 09:12:00 AM
Quote from: crazy canuck on March 28, 2010, 09:01:07 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 28, 2010, 07:12:55 PM
I think Malthus is trying to tell us he was a high-ranking geek.

Who pretended not to care who the popular kids were.

If they didn't do drugs, I may not have even known their names.  :D
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Valmy on March 29, 2010, 09:26:22 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on March 29, 2010, 09:10:30 AM
Bullying seemed much more of a middle and grade school thing from what I remember

Nobody fucked with me after I went through puberty.  Funny how suddenly being 6 inches taller and 50 pounds heavier will do that.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 29, 2010, 09:40:37 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 28, 2010, 07:12:55 PM
I think Malthus is trying to tell us he was a high-ranking geek.

I thought my point was that being a popular stoner wasn't much of a distinction.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Ed Anger on March 29, 2010, 09:46:28 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on March 29, 2010, 09:10:30 AM
Bullying seemed much more of a middle and grade school thing from what I remember

I noticed that after my Freshman year in HS, most bullies in my class stayed freshmen while the rest of us went on up.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Barrister on March 29, 2010, 11:33:26 AM
Quote from: Valmy on March 29, 2010, 09:26:22 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on March 29, 2010, 09:10:30 AM
Bullying seemed much more of a middle and grade school thing from what I remember

Nobody fucked with me after I went through puberty.  Funny how suddenly being 6 inches taller and 50 pounds heavier will do that.

You know as a kid I was pretty damn geeky, wasn't hugely popular, but I wasn't ever 'bullied' or picked on.

Thinking about it though, I was one of the first to hit a growth spurt, and for a time I was the tallest one in my class, with the deepest voice.  That probably had something to do with it.

And by the time everyone caught up (and passed) me bullying in that kind of physical manner really wasn't done.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: crazy canuck on March 29, 2010, 11:48:28 AM
Quote from: Valmy on March 29, 2010, 09:26:22 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on March 29, 2010, 09:10:30 AM
Bullying seemed much more of a middle and grade school thing from what I remember

Nobody fucked with me after I went through puberty.  Funny how suddenly being 6 inches taller and 50 pounds heavier will do that.

The thing I found was that there was always someone who wanted to prove how tough they were by taking on the big guy.  Also there was the problem of my smaller friends picking fights at parties and then expecting me to get them out of trouble.

As a result I was in fights pretty much every weekend in high school - mostly with mill workers that had already graduated from high school (my home town was a small mill town) although most fights were pretty minor.

As for bullying, I was never bullied nor was I a bully.  It wasnt really possible for me since I had good friends in the three main groups at our school - the Jocks, Stoners and Geeks.  The first two meant I wouldnt get bullied and the last meant I couldnt bully.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: crazy canuck on March 29, 2010, 11:54:44 AM
Quote from: Malthus on March 29, 2010, 09:12:00 AM
Quote from: crazy canuck on March 28, 2010, 09:01:07 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 28, 2010, 07:12:55 PM
I think Malthus is trying to tell us he was a high-ranking geek.

Who pretended not to care who the popular kids were.

If they didn't do drugs, I may not have even known their names.  :D

A lot of the Stoner population game to our basketball games.  It gave a real home court advantage when christian schools came to town.  All those long haired rough looking guys and girls going crazy and giving off a rather pungent smell was very unsettling to those clean cut teams and their fans.

Now, you may ask why in the world would they do that....  Simple.  Every once in a while it was possible to convince some of the opposing cheerleaders - who were not as straight laced as they might appear - to come out to the after game party. :cool:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: HVC on March 29, 2010, 12:01:12 PM
I was never bullied in elementary school because i was always the tallest ( Iwas still the tallest into high schhol, then i hit 16 and stopped growing, but everyone else kept going lol). Closest i ever came was this little punk kind who used to like to mess my hair up in grade 9. Thought he was cool becasue he was in a karate class. Did it once or twice until, like the other stories, violence ended that.

Boys stop bullying in high school becasue thats when the threat turns real. in elemantary school the little kid might push back, or something, but once anger and hormones hit in high schhol you can get messed up if you're not careful. added to that, beating up the little guys doesn't get you any points. so it's lose lose. Get beaten up, or be thought a schmuck for beating him up.

conversly, girls bullying really ramps up in high school.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: crazy canuck on March 29, 2010, 12:05:00 PM
Quote from: HVC on March 29, 2010, 12:01:12 PM
conversly, girls bullying really ramps up in high school.

I never really saw any of that.  Must be a generational thing because now it seems to be everywhere.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: Malthus on March 29, 2010, 12:07:52 PM
Quote from: crazy canuck on March 29, 2010, 11:54:44 AM
A lot of the Stoner population game to our basketball games.  It gave a real home court advantage when christian schools came to town.  All those long haired rough looking guys and girls going crazy and giving off a rather pungent smell was very unsettling to those clean cut teams and their fans.

Now, you may ask why in the world would they do that....  Simple.  Every once in a while it was possible to convince some of the opposing cheerleaders - who were not as straight laced as they might appear - to come out to the after game party. :cool:

:lol:

Your high school experience might as well have been on Mars in terms of any similarity to mine.  ;)

Yours seems to have been a reasonably small school in a small town, where people generally knew one another. Mine was in a huge, anonymous high school in Toronto. I couldn't tell you even if we *had* a basketball team. Probably did.

There was no strict hierarchical divisions into jocks, stoners and geeks - there were groups that were one or the other, sure, but they weren't all grouped together. 

There was no bullying of the sort described above, and very little casual fighting either. I suspect mainly because the school was filled mostly with upper middle class kids, whose parents would have freaked if they found out about it.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: crazy canuck on March 29, 2010, 12:14:41 PM
Malthus, agreed the difference in size (my school had less then 300 students in high school) and economic difference in the community (there wasnt really a upper middle class population: there were the kids of the mill owners and the kids of the people that worked in the mills with a very small middle class that provided services) meant that everyone knew eachother and it was pretty easy for me to have friends with widely different interests and activities which is probably how I ended up being the top rebounder in the district and the DM of my DnD group with friends at the basketball games who were likely too stoned to figure out if we were winning or losing. :cool:
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: The Brain on March 29, 2010, 12:48:32 PM
I never saw serious bullying in all my school years. Seems to be more common in less civilized countries.
Title: Re: Stop the Presses! Study Finds Bullies Pick On Unpopular Kids!
Post by: HVC on March 29, 2010, 01:24:51 PM
Quote from: crazy canuck on March 29, 2010, 12:05:00 PM
Quote from: HVC on March 29, 2010, 12:01:12 PM
conversly, girls bullying really ramps up in high school.

I never really saw any of that.  Must be a generational thing because now it seems to be everywhere.
They can be vicious. both verbally and physically. when girls fight it's scary too, becasue they have no rules.