TV/Movies Megathread

[11B4V]

The World According to Dick Cheney.....

[Ideologue]

Ben-Hur (195x).  Really awesome, but what the heck was the miraculous recovery of Judah's mother and sister at the very end?  NOT IN THE BIBLE.

It did bug me a lot, because prior to that point, yes, God was working, but in subtle ways--providing Judah with an improbable but plausible journey from rich merchant to galley slave to consul's son to living vengeance to broken soul to, finally, a man capable of forgiveness and love and happiness.  Sweet.  But then, for no good reason, magic.  I'd like my Biblical-times epics to stay strictly secularly humanist, thanks.

And it is different from The Ten Commandments.  I Am takes its time, but does show up halfway through The TC, and divine wrath is wrought throughout the remainder of its very long running time.  BH, which is even longer, waits until the last five minutes for the naked hand of God to reveal itself.  And that just doesn't work.  We either needed legitimate miracles earlier, or not at all.  I guess what I'm saying is that the lepers had to just die.

That chariot scene is fucking rad, though, right?  What stunt work, what photography!

I went through this with The Ten Commandments, but guess what else was suitable for general audiences back in the 1950s?  SEVERAL MEN GETTING BRUTALLY TRAMPLED TO DEATH BY FUCKING HORSES.  Additionally, the first shot after the entr'acte is a surprisingly framed vista of a Roman massage parlor, with men working vigorously on the uppermost thighs of other men.  Some may enjoy.  Obviously, of course, there is also a crucifixion or three.  However, there is a lot less rape here than in The TC, i.e. none, and somewhat less horrible slavery, i.e. about 40% vs. 80% of the movie, so overall it's probably slightly more appropriate for the millions of actual children that no doubt saw it at the time.

Heston is amazing as ever, but you didn't need me to tell you that.  To watch him is to love him.  What a man.

A (which means, yes, it is in fact exactly as good as at least one Michael Bay movie)

[Martinus]

Seriously? We are reviewing Ben-Hur?

[Eddie Teach]

Why not?

[Martinus]

Well, it's like reviewing Jane Austin's books - so old and everything one could say about them was already said.

[Syt]

Seriously? We are reviewing Ben-Hur?

No one's forcing you to do it, so no idea where this "we" comes from.

[Eddie Teach]

Well, it's like reviewing Jane Austin's books - so old and everything one could say about them was already said.

It's been said but not heard by most people on the forum. I could count the number of books of Austin criticism I've read on a quadriplegic's hands.

[garbon]

Austen and Marti is a twat.

[Ed Anger]

The vikings season ended with a boring thud. First, the boring Viking religion episode, and then the season finale.

Bleh.

[HVC]

They changed the lead character from a cunning kind of amoral character into some psycho on the edge. I could live with unhistorical content, but the show has lost me when it lost a coherent plot line.

[Ed Anger]

Plus, there needs to be way more insane Floki scenes next season.

[HVC]

Yeah folki is good. Someone's been hitting the sacred shrooms too hard. Liked the sacrificed one too.

[Viking]

Plus, there needs to be way more insane Floki scenes next season.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hrafna-Fl%C3%B3ki_Vilger%C3%B0arson

[The Brain]

Ben-Hur? Hours of watching a fucking movie of The Christ, and then a chariot scene that bores you to tears. WTF. The best scene is the hilarious ship battle. "Full speed! Combat speed! Ramming speed! Warp speed!"

[garbon]

I've only ever seen the chariot racing scene. We watched it in Latin class.