TV/Movies Megathread

[CountDeMoney]

Holy Walking Dead shitburgers.  Cool episode.  What an ending.

Nothing happened.

Oh, come on.  It was neat.  It's the build-up to the final climax.

[Liep]

I dunno;  I didn't care too much for Lieutenant "How you guys doing anyway I'm going to check in with HQ, lulz enjoy the Battle of the Bulge TTFN!"

I gotta stop using words like all and only, when don't really mean all or only.

[CountDeMoney]

I gotta stop using words like all and only, when don't really mean all or only.

I knew what you meant.  Just reminded me of him.  What a dweeb.

[Josephus]

At first I thought Walking Dead episode was a bit of a waste, sort of a stalling episode until the final episode. Got good in the last 10 minutes. I knew, well, we all probably knew [spoiler] the governor didn't die so easily [/spoiler] but I didn't see that happen. Like CDM said [spoiler]Andrea is fucked. She's [/spoiler] also on Talking Dead and that's a sure sign [spoiler]your character's time is up.[/spoiler]

[Habbaku]

Except she's been on the show before.

[CountDeMoney]

What I'd like to know is [spoiler]of all the toys on the torture table, what the hell's the speculum doing there?[/spoiler]  Yikes.

[HVC]

What I'd like to know is [spoiler]of all the toys on the torture table, what the hell's the speculum doing there?[/spoiler]  Yikes.

You ask that like you don't already know

[Ideologue]

Plus Ashley Greene is the hottest white woman in Hollywood, at least in her Alice haircuts.  Wowsers.

True. Well, probably not the haircut specification.

Stop enabling long, uncool haircuts.

[Ideologue]

Anyway, the movie was D+, with a clever but ultimately super-lame twist ending that undid a lot of what was (very faintly) cool about the movie (or, if not cool, then at least satisfying to the hostile viewer).  As always, Michael Sheen and Ashley Greene are the rare Reese's cups in these bowls of candy corn, and, as usual, every ancillary character that comes out of nowhere and has no obvious place in the story is still infinitely more interesting than Edward and Bella--except for Revolutionary War guy, who, hey, did you know he was in the Revolutionary War?  Because he mentions it with every one of his five or six lines.  Ugh.

I'll give Kristen Stewart, or maybe director Billy Condon, credit for permitting Bella Swan to actually feel recognizable emotion in some of these scenes--a novelty, to be sure, and ironic enough given that it's not till she's a vampire that any relatable, engaging human qualities whatsoever emerge.

It's the best paced, probably the best acted, and maybe the best written, such as it is, of the five films; so, pretty much perforce, the best overall.  I reckon the shadow of the other four obscure the better qualities in this one.  If it were the second film, or even the third, it might be worth a low C.  And if some decent gore effects had been attempted, or even just more Michael Sheen, you might have wrung a solid B out of me.  But serial storytelling is serial storytelling.  Battlestar Galactica retroactively became crap with its end; by the same token, a watchable final film redeems nothing about the Twilight Saga.

Here's to the reboot!   No, really.  That's happening.

Despite all of this, I'm still excited about The Host.  Aside from the fact the trailer makes it look about one million percent livelier than Twilight, it's Andrew Niccol directing and, more importantly, writing for the screen, and Andrew Niccol, to my knowledge, has never done wrong.  (My Netflix copy of In Time is still sitting on my desk though. )

Oh, the Breaking Dawn Part 2 Rifftrax riff I give a low A.  Only a few huge laughs, I'm afraid (but one very good one).  However, very funny throughout.

[garbon]

[Though if you were to watch the UK one I'd only recommend watching the first few series anyway.
Though doing so might mess things up for your enjoyment of the American one as a lot of the same basic plotlines are being used.
You should probally watch the first series of the British one after you finish the American one just for the interesting comparison.

Lip is cool but a wee bit mary sueish.

Incidentally, I don't know if the Shameless US creators plan for Ian to go bisexual at some point (like they did in the UK version, I understand) but so far (being in the middle of the second season), I gotta say that Shameless US offers probably the most accurate and realistic depiction of the average lifestyle of gay teens/young people on TV I have seen to date.

Everything else I have seen on TV is either too sanitized or too much of a vicarious fantasy.

So I've been watching Shameless now and I have to ask - do you just mean in comparison to what else is on television? I'm not sure otherwise how you could highlight it as a great example of the average lifestyle of a gay teen...

[Eddie Teach]

Stop enabling long, uncool haircuts.

Aesthetics > hipness

[Syt]

Anyway, the movie was D+, with a clever but ultimately super-lame twist ending that undid a lot of what was (very faintly) cool about the movie (or, if not cool, then at least satisfying to the hostile viewer).  As always, Michael Sheen and Ashley Greene are the rare Reese's cups in these bowls of candy corn, and, as usual, every ancillary character that comes out of nowhere and has no obvious place in the story is still infinitely more interesting than Edward and Bella--except for Revolutionary War guy, who, hey, did you know he was in the Revolutionary War?  Because he mentions it with every one of his five or six lines.  Ugh.

To quote the Nostalgia Critic:

Bella from "Twilight." This has to be the most selfish, male-depending, uncaring, manipulative, self-centered, pretentious, idiotic, whining little bitch-bag you will EVER SEE IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE! And honestly, that wouldn't be too bad a character, that'd be very, very interesting... IF IT WAS INTENTIONAL! But it's not! Bella is supposed to represent the everyday teenage girl. If that's the case, then the story really got mixed up who the blood-sucking monster is!

She thinks she's tortured, even though really she has no problems. She gets a crush on a boy and decides she wants to marry him, even though she's not even out of high school yet. She wants to be turned into a vampire, which everyone has said is throwing her life away. But of course, at the enlightening age of 17, she already knows exactly what she wants! Aren't you glad you followed through with every bright idea you had at 17? Aren't you glad you totally committed to something that you knew you could never make a mistake on at that age? Oh yeah, 17! Nobody ever fucks up at that age!

The boyfriend tries to leave her so that he can save her, but she constantly keeps throwing herself off cliffs and putting herself in danger just so he can notice her! Good fucking God! That's right, girls! If your boyfriend leaves you, do exactly this! I assure you it won't backfire in the least! Sure you might be dead, but that'll teach him! She then gets another boy involved, who actually seems supportive and attentive, but she dumps him because the other guy looks at her weird. And by God, how can she turn down a guy with no personality that just looks at her weird? Again, one of those brilliant choices you make at 17!

So now, a whole war is going on all because of her and everyone is going out of their way to try and protect her and she's simply like "Yeah, that's cool." Oh wait, she does try to say once that she's not worth it, but that only lasts a few seconds. She then realizes that she is worth it and is totally on board with having muscle boys carry her around everywhere. And just as her boyfriend finally agrees to marry her. Imagine, a boy being pressured into marriage. She dicks around with the other guy yet again! Oh my God, I mean, Oh! My! God!

I have never seen a character more needy and more insecure. She is such a dumbass in distress, that it's actually kinda scary. She is a scary character! In another dimension, maybe she could've been a great Shakespeare villain. This really complex, developed, psychotic mind. But as the common, everyday relatable girl that we're all supposed to identify with? She is, and always shall be, the biggest Dumbass in Distress. I'm the Nostalgia Critic and... pray for these boys people.

[Grey Fox]

Or you could summarize it as "Twilight is a mormon's sexual fantasy".

[viper37]

I saw the 3rd episode, so now I can comment

- They did not fight in loose order, they fought in shield walls. This is especially silly since in the scene were they test Knut they bring up that they fight side by side. So did the saxons.

This scene represents the first Viking encounters with the people of England, prior to Lindinsfarm.  They didn't fight in shield walls because it wasn't supposed to be a battle, it just sort of happenned like that.  The preview for next week's episodes sees them in a real battle where they form a shield wall.

- Viking hordes do not have dead bodies or human sacrifices in them. Rich burials do.

On that, it seems there are no certainties:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Norse_religion#Sacrifice
Death by stangulation did happen before the Viking age, and likely continued for some time, but it is unknown if it is capital punishment or sacrifice.
I would imagine though, that if it was sacrifice, it would be done "openly", or during a fest and or at a temple.  But since there were no villages at the time, there probably wasn't any temples either.

- The whole male population didn't go raiding, a small proportion did.

The whole male population didn't go raiding, only a small proportion did, they left with only one boat and an handful of warriors.

[viper37]

Andrea is [spoiler]fucked[/spoiler].

could you describe the ending please, the last minute specifically?  My PVR starts recording the next shows juste before the end, so I always miss it