Almost Totaled by ... a Bear

[Ed Anger]

Hyuk hyuk!

Not a joke.

Didn't think it was. 

[PDH]

I think you mean "blended in with everyday americans."

I meant what I said...though it is the same thing, really.

[Darth Wagtaros]

I've almost hit deer.  They are plentiful in these parts.  Usually dont see bears in the road.  Backyards yes.  Roads no.

Good thing he didn't give you his Care Bear Stare.

[PDH]

I've hit a deer...in a U-Haul...fun.

Had a friend hit a pig one time, that caused some major damage...I understand hitting a bison is not good...

[Tonitrus]

I've hit a deer...in a U-Haul...fun.

Had a friend hit a pig one time, that caused some major damage...I understand hitting a bison is not good...

And they don't like Spaniards.

Associated Press - June 24, 2009 7:55 PM ET

YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK, WYO. (AP) - A 50-year-old woman from Spain was butted and tossed in the air Wednesday by a bull bison in Yellowstone National Park.

Park officials say it happened about 11:25 a.m. as the woman and her husband were using a pay phone at the Canyon visitor area.

Witnesses said two bull bison walked down the road, passing within 20 feet of the couple, who were facing away from the road and did not see the bison. 1 of the bison left the road, walked up behind the woman and butted her into the air.

Other visitors took the injured woman to the front desk at Canyon Lodge. She was then taken by ambulance to the Lake Clinic, where she was treated for minor injuries and released.

Park officials did not identify the woman or say where in Spain she was from.

[Neil]

Nobody much likes Spaniards, what with the whole surrendering to Al Qaeda thing.

[PDH]

True story.  When I was living in Cody, to the East of Yellowstone, a tourist thought a picture with a bison would be cool.  What do you know, there were some rolling in the dirt!  So he walked up to the largest, stood there to get his picture, and then decided that he wanted another with it standing, so he threw rocks at it until it stood...

Then it did the head-turn, horn-dig, toss him by his thigh into the air to teach him that bison don't like that.  He was medivaced to Salt Lake, then served with papers for disturbing the wildlife.

I don't know if he was a Spaniard.

[Darth Wagtaros]

True story.  When I was living in Cody, to the East of Yellowstone, a tourist thought a picture with a bison would be cool.  What do you know, there were some rolling in the dirt!  So he walked up to the largest, stood there to get his picture, and then decided that he wanted another with it standing, so he threw rocks at it until it stood...

Then it did the head-turn, horn-dig, toss him by his thigh into the air to teach him that bison don't like that.  He was medivaced to Salt Lake, then served with papers for disturbing the wildlife.

I don't know if he was a Spaniard.

HOpefully he was rendered into condition for a Darwin Award to apply.  Reminds me of the one with the mother coating her kids hands with honey so a bear would lick them, making for a CUTE pictures.

[Malthus]

Yikes, sounds scary. Was Carl in the car with you?

Yup, and his 4 year old cousin. Neither was all that impressed by seeing an actual bear in the wild. They would be if they were a bit older I think.

Friends drove from Calgary to Vancouver and saw, like, close to a dozen bears. And bald eagles.

It all depends on where you are. Bears are normal enough further north (you can go to the town dumb and see as many as you like) but used to be very unusual that far south, so close to Barrie and Toronto.

[Neil]

(you can go to the town dumb and see as many as you like)

In Edmonton, the town dumb is the city council.

[Monoriu]

There are lots of cattle sitting on rural roads in Hong Kong.  Farmers used to keep cattle to help with the work decades ago.  They let the cattle run wild after they no longer need them.  So they continue to multiply to this day.  They love roads because the surface is warmer. 

[Neil]

There are lots of cattle sitting on rural roads in Hong Kong.  Farmers used to keep cattle to help with the work decades ago.  They let the cattle run wild after they no longer need them.  So they continue to multiply to this day.  They love roads because the surface is warmer.

And there's no natural predators to take care of the cattle, because the Chinamen have eaten all of their penises.

[sbr]

There are lots of cattle sitting on rural roads in Hong Kong.  Farmers used to keep cattle to help with the work decades ago.  They let the cattle run wild after they no longer need them.  So they continue to multiply to this day.  They love roads because the surface is warmer.

And there's no natural predators to take care of the cattle, because the Chinamen have eaten all of their penises.

Whose penises?  The cattle's or the Chinamen's?

[MadBurgerMaker]

There are lots of cattle sitting on rural roads in Hong Kong.  Farmers used to keep cattle to help with the work decades ago.  They let the cattle run wild after they no longer need them.  So they continue to multiply to this day.  They love roads because the surface is warmer.

Heh...there used to be some "holdouts" in the middle of San Antonio where the owners had cattle and such....they kept them fenced up though, of course.  I remember one night fairly soon after high school (so...'99 or so, I guess), the fence on one of these properties was cut somehow, probably some kids, and the cattle wandered out onto the road.  After nearly plowing into a group of cows at 50mph in my tiny little MX-3, I ended up having to wait for about 15 minutes for them to move.  They just don't care if you honk or yell at them or anything.  If they don't want to move, they wont. 

The last of these properties that I know of sold only a couple of months ago.  Right next to the South Texas Medical Center, these people had cows and horses and shit running around within sight of a couple of major roads (by "within sight," I mean the fence was only separated from the road by a curb), and probably 50 yards from a major highway (IH-10).  Now it's been cleared to be another strip mall. 

[DisturbedPervert]

HOpefully he was rendered into condition for a Darwin Award to apply.  Reminds me of the one with the mother coating her kids hands with honey so a bear would lick them, making for a CUTE pictures.

My grandparents used to go to Yellowstone back in the 70s, they used to see parents giving their children food to feed the bears with all time.  It really did make for cool pictures.  Not as cool as they could have been though.