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The Off Topic Topic

Started by Korea, March 10, 2009, 06:24:26 AM

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crazy canuck

Quote from: CountDeMoney on June 26, 2013, 02:03:08 PM
I know it's all you breeders' greatest moment of your life and all that and I appreciate that shit, I really do, but it doesn't change the fact that childbirth is gross as all balls.

Somehow, I didnt notice the gross part at all.

Eddie Teach

Quote from: derspiess on June 26, 2013, 02:10:27 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on June 26, 2013, 02:03:08 PM
I know it's all you breeders' greatest moment of your life and all that and I appreciate that shit, I really do, but it doesn't change the fact that childbirth is gross as all balls.

That it is.  But when it's your own offspring being born, you can look past it.  To a certain point anyway.  When Tommy was born I had to ask them 3 times to get the damned afterbirth out of my sight.

Many animals eat it.
To sleep, perchance to dream. But in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?

Grey Fox

It might be a great moment in my life but what I find gross is the smell :puke:
Colonel Caliga is Awesome.

CountDeMoney

I'd be the worst husband.

Preggo chicks totally creep me out sexually so that's 9 months of abstinence right there, and after witnessing Junior's official league-endorsed helmet popping through it like Earl Fucking Campbell, I don't think I could approach that roast beef platter for a year.

Better off sticking with spayed cats.

Admiral Yi

Quote from: Peter Wiggin on June 26, 2013, 02:18:49 PM
Many animals eat it.

Our house cats always gobbled it right up. nomnomnom

I believe for a while it was trendy in America for couples to cook it up and eat it at home.

CountDeMoney

Quote from: Admiral Yi on June 26, 2013, 02:25:10 PM
I believe for a while it was trendy in America for couples to cook it up and eat it at home.

To a rare extent, but what a lot of people like to do is take it home and bury it under a tree, for various goofball holistic/Wiccan/Birkenstock reasons.

Actually had a big problem with that once; charged someone for sneaking that shit out against policy;  the mother and kid were both Hepatitis positive, so it was theft of biohazardous material.

lustindarkness

Quote from: CountDeMoney on June 26, 2013, 02:23:55 PM
I'd be the worst husband.

Preggo chicks totally creep me out sexually so that's 9 months of abstinence right there, and after witnessing Junior's official league-endorsed helmet popping through it like Earl Fucking Campbell, I don't think I could approach that roast beef platter for a year.

Better off sticking with spayed cats.

Weirdo. Pregnant women are sexy.
Grand Duke of Lurkdom

derspiess

Quote from: lustindarkness on June 26, 2013, 02:56:17 PM
Weirdo. Pregnant women are sexy.

Eh, no.  If they are still hot, it's in spite of being preggers.
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

Barrister

Quote from: crazy canuck on June 26, 2013, 02:13:30 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on June 26, 2013, 02:03:08 PM
I know it's all you breeders' greatest moment of your life and all that and I appreciate that shit, I really do, but it doesn't change the fact that childbirth is gross as all balls.

Somehow, I didnt notice the gross part at all.

Then you're a better man than I, because I certainly noticed how gross it was.

Sigh - I guess I get to go through that one more time in a few months...

Posts here are my own private opinions.  I do not speak for my employer.

Tamas

Quote from: Peter Wiggin on June 26, 2013, 02:18:49 PM
Quote from: derspiess on June 26, 2013, 02:10:27 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on June 26, 2013, 02:03:08 PM
I know it's all you breeders' greatest moment of your life and all that and I appreciate that shit, I really do, but it doesn't change the fact that childbirth is gross as all balls.

That it is.  But when it's your own offspring being born, you can look past it.  To a certain point anyway.  When Tommy was born I had to ask them 3 times to get the damned afterbirth out of my sight.

Many animals eat it.

Dogs eat their own vomit. Nothing special about dumb animals eating their own afterbirth. It's what dumb animals do. They eat shit.

derspiess

They asked me to hold one of her legs back while she was pushing.  I started to ask if they were short-staffed or something, but I had already been judged by room full of women (nurses & my wife) over some innocent yet somehow offensive jokes I made.  So I didn't want any more judgment. 

I kept telling myself "don't look down, don't look down" but I looked down.  Up until that point I never understood why men fainted during delivery.  I wouldn't say I was actually close to fainting, but my knees did get a little weak and I was a little lightheaded.

Still, I think it was the sheer weight of emotion over what was happening that did it to me rather than the grossness that affected me.  I could put the stretching & whatnot out of my mind, but for some reason the afterbirth sitting there in the pan took some getting over.
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

katmai

Quote from: derspiess on June 26, 2013, 03:34:17 PM
They asked me to hold one of her legs back while she was pushing.  I started to ask if they were short-staffed or something, but I had already been judged by room full of women (nurses & my wife) over some innocent yet somehow offensive jokes I made.  So I didn't want any more judgment. 


That's our boy!
Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son

Razgovory

Well this thread took an unpleasant turn.
I've given it serious thought. I must scorn the ways of my family, and seek a Japanese woman to yield me my progeny. He shall live in the lands of the east, and be well tutored in his sacred trust to weave the best traditions of Japan and the Sacred South together, until such time as he (or, indeed his house, which will periodically require infusion of both Southern and Japanese bloodlines of note) can deliver to the South it's independence, either in this world or in space.  -Lettow April of 2011

Raz is right. -MadImmortalMan March of 2017

derspiess

Quote from: katmai on June 26, 2013, 03:37:37 PM
Quote from: derspiess on June 26, 2013, 03:34:17 PM
They asked me to hold one of her legs back while she was pushing.  I started to ask if they were short-staffed or something, but I had already been judged by room full of women (nurses & my wife) over some innocent yet somehow offensive jokes I made.  So I didn't want any more judgment. 


That's our boy!

The only one I remember was me complaining about how the pregnancy had been a drag on me because I kept needing to turn up the TV volume to drown out the sound of her throwing up from morning sickness.  Women :rolleyes:
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

derspiess

Quote from: Razgovory on June 26, 2013, 03:37:41 PM
Well this thread took an unpleasant turn.

Cards finally won one last night.  I think I caught the Raz bug, because I watched all the Texas games and they lost, yet last night I was too busy to turn the game on and they won.  I want to watch tonight but I know I shouldn't.
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall