Poll
Question:
...what would you say to Him?
Option 1: "What is The Truth Regarding All Things?"
Option 2: "Who the fuck are you?"
Option 3: "Why the hell aren't you ethnic, gay or female??!?"
Option 4: "I like your moves, especially the early, furious ones."
Option 5: "Have you ever had a problem with... freshness?"
Option 6: "Honey, we're pregnant!"
Option 7: "What's the deal with New York? It's neither New, York, nor an Empire."
Option 8: "F U JARON"
Well? There's so much talk about religion here so I want to know more.
"Why don't you look like Alanis Morrisette or Morgan Freeman?"
but seriously..
"Why did you insist we make decisions determining the fate of our eternal souls based on false, flawed, contradictory and incomplete information?"
"So which god are you then? How many others are there?"
"Are you trying to make your way home? Back up to haven all alone?"
You lost? Where's Jesus(spanish pronounciation)?
Quote from: Viking on October 13, 2012, 05:35:39 AM
"Why don't you look like Alanis Morrisette or Morgan Freeman?"
That's option three in the poll.
Quote from: Martinus on October 13, 2012, 08:44:26 AM
Quote from: Viking on October 13, 2012, 05:35:39 AM
"Why don't you look like Alanis Morrisette or Morgan Freeman?"
That's option three in the poll.
Yeah, thats what I voted.
"What does God need with a starship?"
I have a list of people that you might want to think about smiting perhaps.
Quote from: Tonitrus on October 13, 2012, 08:52:11 AM
"What does God need with a starship?"
And the follow-up, "Why did you let Man create such shitty Star Trek movies between Khan and the reboot?"
"Can you tell me the winning lottery numbers for the next week, or, um, month...let's say an even decade. I'll give some of my winnings to some charity."
Quote from: Viking on October 13, 2012, 05:35:39 AM
"Why don't you look like Alanis Morrisette or Morgan Freeman?"
but seriously..
"Why did you insist we make decisions determining the fate of our eternal souls based on false, flawed, contradictory and incomplete information?"
I imagine that if you met God you'd be trying to convince yourself you are hallucinating. Either that or become extremely worshipful. You seem the type that could go from militant atheist to fanatical God bother.
"So, gay foot fetish should be alright, what with Jesus washing feet of the Apostles and all, right?"
Quote from: Razgovory on October 13, 2012, 01:17:25 PM
Quote from: Viking on October 13, 2012, 05:35:39 AM
"Why don't you look like Alanis Morrisette or Morgan Freeman?"
but seriously..
"Why did you insist we make decisions determining the fate of our eternal souls based on false, flawed, contradictory and incomplete information?"
I imagine that if you met God you'd be trying to convince yourself you are hallucinating. Either that or become extremely worshipful. You seem the type that could go from militant atheist to fanatical God bother.
I accepted the challenge on face value and within the scope of the questioners intent. I'm dead, too late to do anything and am faced with the fact that there is a god and I am given a chance to say something.
"so you're real, huh? My bad "
Quote from: Viking on October 13, 2012, 01:21:23 PM
Quote from: Razgovory on October 13, 2012, 01:17:25 PM
Quote from: Viking on October 13, 2012, 05:35:39 AM
"Why don't you look like Alanis Morrisette or Morgan Freeman?"
but seriously..
"Why did you insist we make decisions determining the fate of our eternal souls based on false, flawed, contradictory and incomplete information?"
I imagine that if you met God you'd be trying to convince yourself you are hallucinating. Either that or become extremely worshipful. You seem the type that could go from militant atheist to fanatical God bother.
I accepted the challenge on face value and within the scope of the questioners intent. I'm dead, too late to do anything and am faced with the fact that there is a god and I am given a chance to say something.
I thought being dead is not part of the question - I assumed I'm still alive.
Quote from: Syt on October 13, 2012, 05:53:41 AM
"Are you trying to make your way home? Back up to haven all alone?"
I'd ask him why he won't return my phone calls. If nobody's calling he must have changed his number or something.
Quote from: Martinus on October 13, 2012, 01:19:20 PM
"So, gay foot fetish should be alright, what with Jesus washing feet of the Apostles and all, right?"
I don't recall Jesus jamming all five digits into his mouth like it was a Warsaw hotdog eating contest while draping his cock with dirty tube socks in my copy of the Children's Illustrated Bible. Was it in yours?
Hello. As an agnostic, please prove yourself by giving me a orgy with Natalie Portman and emma de caunes. Thank you.
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 04:34:28 PM
Hello. As an agnostic, please prove yourself by giving me a orgy with Natalie Portman and emma de caunes. Thank you.
Aiming kinda low, are you? Hell, God doesn't need to do that, plenty of minor prophets can handle that request.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 13, 2012, 05:01:29 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 04:34:28 PM
Hello. As an agnostic, please prove yourself by giving me a orgy with Natalie Portman and emma de caunes. Thank you.
Aiming kinda low, are you? Hell, God doesn't need to do that, plenty of minor prophets can handle that request.
I was being humble.
"Who are you and what are you doing in My chair?"
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 05:40:59 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 13, 2012, 05:01:29 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 04:34:28 PM
Hello. As an agnostic, please prove yourself by giving me a orgy with Natalie Portman and emma de caunes. Thank you.
Aiming kinda low, are you? Hell, God doesn't need to do that, plenty of minor prophets can handle that request.
I was being humble.
He will give you the women from Mamas and Papas instead. The thin one represents His merciful New Testament side while the fat one His douchebaggy Old Testament side.
Quote from: Octavian on October 13, 2012, 05:59:08 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 05:40:59 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 13, 2012, 05:01:29 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 04:34:28 PM
Hello. As an agnostic, please prove yourself by giving me a orgy with Natalie Portman and emma de caunes. Thank you.
Aiming kinda low, are you? Hell, God doesn't need to do that, plenty of minor prophets can handle that request.
I was being humble.
He will give you the women from Mamas and Papas instead. The thin one represents His merciful New Testament side while the fat one His douchebaggy Old Testament side.
:mad:
Since god has a sense of humor, I'd get 12 year old Natalie Portman and Miley Cyrus.
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 06:09:24 PM
Since god has a sense of humor, I'd get 12 year old Natalie Portman and Miley Cyrus.
Bingo.
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 06:09:24 PM
Since god has a sense of humor, I'd get 12 year old Natalie Portman and Miley Cyrus.
god makes siege's dreams come
True?
Quote from: katmai on October 13, 2012, 06:13:36 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 06:09:24 PM
Since god has a sense of humor, I'd get 12 year old Natalie Portman and Miley Cyrus.
god makes siege's dreams come
True?
He's got to give the heebs something for all those years of misery.
Quote from: katmai on October 13, 2012, 06:13:36 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 13, 2012, 06:09:24 PM
Since god has a sense of humor, I'd get 12 year old Natalie Portman and Miley Cyrus.
god makes siege's dreams come
True?
No, as he'd prefer 8 year old Natalie. He would be disappointed.
"lol, you have done a shitty job"
what about a citizens arrest and a one way ticket to Spandau prison?