I just came across one that I think takes the case. Anyone seen a better one?
Butts Arrested in Boob Murder Casehttp://wearecentralpa.com/wtaj-news-fulltext/?nxd_id=203465
QuotePOTTER TOWNSHIP, CENTRE COUNTY - Police have arrested a third person in connection with the murder of Samuel Boob.
Boob was shot and killed at his home in Potter Township, Centre County, on the morning of August 23rd, 2009.
Kermit Butts, 26, of Madisonburg, is accused of driving the suspected killer to and from the crime scene on the morning of the killing. He was charged with aggravated assault and assisting a murder suspect and placed in the Centre County Prison.
Police believe that Butts drove Ronald Heichel to the Boob home and picked him up later in the day on August 23rd, 2009. Police believe Heichel shot Sam Boob twice with a shotgun and killed him. Heichel was charged with 1st degree murder.
The victim's wife, Mirinda Boob, is accused of working with Heichel to have her husband killed. Police say they have text messages that were sent between her and Heichel, proving that the two were working together to kill Samuel. She has been charged with conspiracy to commit murder.
Who the hell texts a murder plot?
Teenage girls?
Takes the case? :huh:
Quote from: garbon on December 15, 2011, 10:55:44 PM
Takes the case? :huh:
He meant tastes the cake. :mmm:
IKE BEATS TINA TO DEATH - The Sun on Ike Turner's passing.
RACIST IN PEACE - The Sun on Bernard Manning's death.
THE EWE-SUAL SUSPECTS - The Salisbury Chronicle on a Romanian immigrant caught having sex with a sheep.
Off the top of my head :mellow:
Edit:
GRABBEY ROAD - The Sun on Heather Mills divorcing Paul McCartney's another joy.
I always rather liked DEWEY DEFEATS TRUMAN.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fen%2F5%2F58%2FThe_Sun_%2528Gotcha%2529.png&hash=538877cb5fc46af5c9cc7eaea94215f3d32d2fb4)
German tabloid BILD once literally cracked me up when I read their huge headline, oh, 10 years or so ago in the supermarket. The paper is large format and folded in half, with the top half showing, and usually having a big, alarmist headline. Think The Sun, but ore insidious. In the past they had the power to make or break celebrities and politicians - those powers are weakened these days, but still there to some extent.
Anyways, the headline in question was:
"UFO-Sekte will Hitler klonen" - "UFO sect wants to clone Hitler"
It was so beautifully absurd, and at the same time was a quartet of UFOs, an ominous sect, cloning and Hitler. I hope whoever came up with that one got a bonus. (The byline was something about the sect wanting to clone Hitler, so he could be put on trial for his crimes . . . there's a bestseller novel in there somewhere. ;) )
"Had sex change, married each other" is one I remember.
In a small town local paper I saw "The principal still principal".
Don't know about the best, but one memorable headline is "MURDER TODAY on Östermalm COUNT SHOT NEGRO WITH HUNTING RIFLE", Aftonbladet anno 1970.
(It was a homosexual lover's quarrel and the sentence would be manslaughter and not murder)
"Robbed robbed robber"
(A man was robbed of his phone, ran after the robber and not only took the phone back, but robbed the robber of his cell phone. Both were prosecuted for robbery.)
You might remember the 70s story about the Uruguayan rugby team whose plane crashed in the Andes when they were travelling to Chile and were stranded for two months, having to resort to cannibalism to survive. A provincial newspaper from a city nearby to mine ran, back in the day when the full story was made public, the following headline:
"They had to resort to Anthropology to survive"
"HEADLESS BODY IN TOPLESS BAR" New York Post.
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 08:56:22 AM
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
You've wanted to be a lot of things, snowflake. :hug:
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 08:56:22 AM
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
You've wanted to be a lot of things, snowflake. :hug:
Not Vanity Fair, though. GARBON GOES GABBO FOR GRALLON. Yuck.
Quote from: The Larch on December 16, 2011, 04:28:23 AM
"They had to resort to Anthropology to survive"
May I never be reduced to so desperate a state :o
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 09:04:20 AM
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 08:56:22 AM
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
You've wanted to be a lot of things, snowflake. :hug:
Not Vanity Fair, though. GARBON GOES GABBO FOR GRALLON. Yuck.
That's only because you need more realistic headlines.
GARBON GOES GARBO FOR HILLARY
GRALLON GOES PEE-WEE FOR BIEBER
My childish mind likes the title of this scientific article:
"Uranus takes a pounding more frequently than thought"
http://www.cosmostv.org/2011/10/uranus-takes-pounding-more-frequently.html
:D
Quote from: Malthus on December 16, 2011, 11:30:02 AM
My childish mind likes the title of this scientific article:
"Uranus takes a pounding more frequently than thought"
http://www.cosmostv.org/2011/10/uranus-takes-pounding-more-frequently.html
:D
I love that one too :lol:
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 09:08:41 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 09:04:20 AM
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 08:56:22 AM
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
You've wanted to be a lot of things, snowflake. :hug:
Not Vanity Fair, though. GARBON GOES GABBO FOR GRALLON. Yuck.
That's only because you need more realistic headlines.
GARBON GOES GARBO FOR HILLARY
GRALLON GOES PEE-WEE FOR BIEBER
:lol:
Quote from: Malthus on December 16, 2011, 11:30:02 AM
My childish mind likes the title of this scientific article:
"Uranus takes a pounding more frequently than thought"
http://www.cosmostv.org/2011/10/uranus-takes-pounding-more-frequently.html
:D
There used to be a strip club in my neighbourhood named "Uranus."
Now it's a Starbucks... :(
In his early Tonight Show days, Leno showed a headline from some local newspaper: "Man Beats off Bear to Save Friend" :lol:
Quote from: derspiess on December 16, 2011, 05:02:17 PM
In his early Tonight Show days, Leno showed a headline from some local newspaper: "Man Beats off Bear to Save Friend" :lol:
Do they show the bear having a smoke afterwards? ;)
I liked "Judge Rules in Wolf Suit."
After a very bad performance by Angels pitcher Bartolo Colon one of the local LA papers had the headline "Colon Pounded Again".
I don't have a link or picture, it was a long time ago and I am afraid to Google the phrase, sorry.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FK8Tm5.jpg&hash=d590e0e292ec377a4600f8dc09086d5d15283700)
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fassets0.ordienetworks.com%2Fimages%2Fuser_photos%2F1231950%2F45c88a4486a9c00c0329439cb22dc300_width_600x.jpg&hash=d9b9c9f22f3a3b52b01ab11de7a70c7c15d7fe0b)
Quote from: grumbler on December 16, 2011, 08:40:19 PM
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fassets0.ordienetworks.com%2Fimages%2Fuser_photos%2F1231950%2F45c88a4486a9c00c0329439cb22dc300_width_600x.jpg&hash=d9b9c9f22f3a3b52b01ab11de7a70c7c15d7fe0b)
:lol:
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 09:08:41 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 09:04:20 AM
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 08:56:22 AM
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
You've wanted to be a lot of things, snowflake. :hug:
Not Vanity Fair, though. GARBON GOES GABBO FOR GRALLON. Yuck.
That's only because you need more realistic headlines.
GARBON GOES GARBO FOR HILLARY
GRALLON GOES PEE-WEE FOR BIEBER
I didn't know you had a thing for people who look like ugly lesbians.
Or Hillary.
Quote from: Martinus on December 17, 2011, 03:29:42 AM
I didn't know you had a thing for people who look like ugly lesbians.
Or Hillary.
Did you ragequit and leave the forum for the entirety of 2008? :huh:
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on December 17, 2011, 03:39:41 AM
Quote from: Martinus on December 17, 2011, 03:29:42 AM
I didn't know you had a thing for people who look like ugly lesbians.
Or Hillary.
Did you ragequit and leave the forum for the entirety of 2008? :huh:
Nah, he prefers quantity over quality.
MEGALON, NO!
Quote from: Martinus on December 17, 2011, 03:29:42 AM
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 09:08:41 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 09:04:20 AM
Quote from: garbon on December 16, 2011, 08:58:35 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on December 16, 2011, 08:56:22 AM
I always wanted to be the cover editor for the NY Post.
You've wanted to be a lot of things, snowflake. :hug:
Not Vanity Fair, though. GARBON GOES GABBO FOR GRALLON. Yuck.
That's only because you need more realistic headlines.
GARBON GOES GARBO FOR HILLARY
GRALLON GOES PEE-WEE FOR BIEBER
I didn't know you had a thing for people who look like ugly lesbians.
Or Hillary.
:huh:
What about ads?
I still can't get over this one. And in case some messerschmitt is here: everyone in Sweden speaks English.
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi13.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fa299%2FSlayhem%2Fbc84bad9.jpg&hash=b5de3411b98e01dcb58911d4d8d046cc3dd3479a)
And why not? It's fine.
One from the mid-1990s, on the BBC website:
Concorde wreckage searched; eyes on black box.
Massachusetts budget back in the African-American.