I picked up Darklands from GOG - which saves me the trouble of fidgeting with the old disks ... for which I don't have any drive anymore.
I'm rather rusty on the game, but it's still good fun if a bit repetitive in parts.
Anyways, this is the story of the intrepid Band of Languish who joined to make a name for themselves in Medieval Germany. Don't expect any screenshots - unlike the gameplay, the graphics haven't aged very gracefully, as you can see here:
http://www.mobygames.com/game/dos/darklands/screenshots
Anyways, introductions are in order.
Eduard von Angersberg, intrepid leader
An old knight of 40, Eduard is pretty good at cutting things with his short sword. The nobleman's son is very virtuous, if grumpy, and sets out to teach the youth of today in the old, better ways. His skilled rhetoric sure helps.
Balthasar Geldgraf
Geldgraf grew up as son of city commoners. He joined the army and became a veteran of many campaigns. After his military career he became a thief and swindler and learned to survive on the tough city streets of the Reich. He's also skilled in stealth.
Thimoteus Olson
A 25 year old, wide eyed alchemist, Tim looks at everything with a sense of wonder. He's not a great fighter, and he's still a beginning alchemist, but at least he can read and write better than anyone in the band and notices things others tend to overlook.
Berta Brazenberg
She is the daughter of wealthy townsfolk, but after a spiritual experience as a child, she joined a monastery and became a nun. Now, age 30, she decided to spread the word of God among the people of Germany. She's surprisingly handy with a flail, knows a bit about healing, and is almost fluent in Latin. Her virtue is never in doubt and she has studied the works of St. Denis and St. Patrick.
Martinus Kochastop
Something is queer about this priest. Maybe it's how he keeps cursing all the time. Maybe it's the way he stares at people's feet. He speaks German and Latin fluently, and has uncanny penmanship.
Karl "Caliga" Stiefel
A tall, broadshouldered man from the woods around Paderborn. He has spent most of his days as a hunter. He's not the brightest, but he knows his way around in the wilderness, and he's even stronger than Eduard. His simple country charms might open a few doors that might otherwise stay closed.
Herrmann Hirner
A somewhat crazed craftsman, highly intelligent and somewhat useful with a sword. After his previous workshop in a northern city blew up, he's travlled aimlessly before joining the band.
IN MEMORIAM
Timotheus Olson - 30th August 1400. Slain by a bandit in Wismar.
Berta Brazenberg - 24th November 1400. Killed by a thief in Paderborn.
Martinus Kochastop - 5th May 1401. Killed in pitched battle by a robber knight.
It's the 29th of August, 1400 AD, and the group makes their vows of allegiance in the Wädekin, a popular inn in the Baltic town of Wismar ...
I was always fascinated by Darklands, glad you started this. :)
Tim wants to be of use to the group, so they grudgingly humor him by heading to Udalrich Linck, the best alchemist in town where Tim hopes to learn a thing or two. Unfortunately, the alchemist takes a look at the ragtag band and scoffs at them.
Brazenberg spots a physician across the street. She discusses the craft with him and finds his skills medicore. Still, she asks if she can learn something from him. He rejects courteously. Night has fallen and the group go to the Inn for the night. Geldgraf and Angersberg mumble to each other over their meal what a waste of time this day has been.
The next day, Eduard drags them to the market, hoping that someone has some work for them there. They go to the offices of the Fuggers, the Hanseatic League and the Medici, but everywhere the same result: sorry, no job for the likes of you. The Fürstenhof, the seat of government, doesn't even let them in! So they head for the churches for spiritual guidance.
The priest at Marienkirche is not much help. Mass is stilla time off, so the band decide to cleanse themselves for their tasks by confessing their sins. The priest confers his blessings and eleven hours owrth of penance upon them. Bastard! When they're done it's the middle of the night, and only the clueless altar boy is still mucking about.
"Screw this," Eduard grunts. They head out to the streets.
"Let's head for the docks," Geldgraf suggests. "I, uhm, heard that's where unsavory people like to hang out at night. Maybe we can clean the place up a little."
"Beats sneaking back to the inn," Eduard agrees.
"Guys, are you sure this is wise?" Tim asks.
The others ignore him.
Sure enough, they run into some mooks, but they're quickly taken care of; the proud heroes only carry minor wounds. Some passers by cheer them on, but otherwise, the loot is pretty meager. A couple of clubs and smelly clothes. Better than nothing.
"Someone in the market better buy this crap." Eduard slings the bag over his shoulder.
At first sunlight, they find a trader in the market who buys the clubs and cheap leather armor. Unfortunately, no one wants the smelly bandit pants, so Eduard just drops them in a side alley.
They spend the rest of the day in the local Black Monastery. As usual, apprenticeships aren't offered, but Geldgraf slinks off to learn about St. Finnian, who can offer bonuses to street smarts, charisma and rhetoric.
The day passes quickly, and the group head back to the inn. On their way, Tim spots bandits hiding in ambush. He suggests talking their way out of the situation, but the others won't have any of it.
The fight is quick and brutal. The bandits lose, but at great cost - one of them dashes for Tim who had tried to stay in safety while the others fight. Thimoteus is killed by a cut to his throat before the others can help him. The group is aghast and retire to the inn to contemplate the loss.
"Only slowed us down, anyways," Eduard mutters.
:)
Quote from: Syt on October 23, 2011, 04:03:21 AM
Thimotheus Olson
but at least he can read and write better than anyone in the band and notices things others tend to overlook.
:lol:
Now that Timotheus is dead, introduce a sodomite physician, Martinus von Schwulenberg? :ph34r:
Make him a monk.
The three decide to look for a good fit for their little party.
"You know," Geldgraf says, "we'll be travelling a fair bit, if only to get out of this shithole. Would be good to have someone who knows about life outside the city walls."
"And someone who can actually fight," Eduard says. "Maybe a craftsman?"
B has already made up her mind, though. She has spotted a fabulously dressed priest at a neighbouring table. He seems a bit shy, for he constantly looks down, at people's feet. She walks over, talks to him and then returns with him to the table.
"This is Martinus Kochastop," she says and smiles.
"What kind of a stupid name is that?" Geldgraf asks.
"He's not from here," B says.
"What, can't he speak?" Eduard grunts.
"Indeed I can, good sirs," the priest says, looking intently at Eduard's and Geldgraf's feet. They squirm uncomfortably in their seats.
Over the next hour, Martinus talks their ears off. He's 35, has studied a long time and had only recently become a priest. He doesn't seem exactly religious or virtuous - which Geldgraf likes - but he can talk, in German and Latin, and he knows how to handle a quill, and almost even a sword.
"Which I don't have," Martinus says. He looks apologetically at the other three. "I don't think any of you can help me out?"
Geldgraf and Eduard roll their eyes.
"Of course," B says, casting a scolding look towards the other two. "We'll head to the markets right away."
They sell last night's bandits' equipment. Geldgraf and Eduard try to shove one of the rusty falchion on Martinus, but he rfuses, insisting on a new weapon. They sigh and buy him a new short sword of good quality. They dump another set of stained bandits' pants in a dark corner and decide that they've seen enough of Wismar.
It's the 31st of August, 1400 AD, and they quartett decides to travel to Lübeck, queen of the Hansa, hoping to find more lucrative work there.
Before they can leave, though, Geldgraf speaks up. "You know, those bandits whacked me pretty bad. Can't we heal up first?"
Eduard gives him the eye. "Weak."
"Actually, I need some patching up, too", B says.
"Ok. Fine!"
The four rest up some more in Wismar. Geldgraf and B heal up. Eduard earns some money as a swordsmith, and Martinus finds a bit of work as a clerk, where B later joins as a scribe. They make a small profit.
It's the 11th of September when they decide to leave.
"Why haven't we bothered to give Tim a proper burial?" B asks as they walk out of the city gate.
Eduard just shrugs.
They've barely lost sight of the city walls, when Martinus halts them. "I think I hear something ahead!"
They discuss what they should do. Martinus insists he can talk their way out of this. But he's barely said a word, when the bandits attack!
They fight them off, but B is badly wounded. With almost all of the journey still ahead, they decide to return to Wismar for the moment.
On the plus side, the bandits had some decent equipment. Martinus is wearing leather armor now, and so does B. The rest of the equipment is sold in Wismar, where the four now have gained a bit of respect of the people. Eduard and Geldgraf celebrate by buying shields for themselves after they've sold the bandits' belongings.
They head for the town physician. Unfortunately, he's a bit of a quack and charges them extraordinarily. The four decide that it's cheaper to tend to B in the inn while the rest of them earn some more money.
It's September 19th when they decide to try their luck again to find some jobs in town. And indeed, the Fugger banker Michel Dungern has a task for which he promises them 4 florin. The party look at him expactently.
"Well," the banker begins, "I've been searching for a holy artifact my whole life. Are you familiar with the Song of the Nibelungs?"
The four look at each other. "I guess," Martinus says.
"Then you know of Siegfried's helmet that gave him invisibility? I have strong proof that it's somewhere near Frankfurt on the Oder River. Now, where's that map . . . ?"
He bends over a trunk and rummages in it. The four use the opportunity to leave quietly, shaking their heads.
"Crazy fuck," Geldgraf says.
The Hansa and Medici still don't want anything to do with our heroes, and so they decide to leave the city after all.
The short journey to Lübeck is uneventful this time, and they arrive late on September 20th. Eduard chats with the city guards and they let the group inwithout paying the toll, and even though it's the middle of the night. They group decide to hang out in an inn till daybreak.
The group begins their usual rounds.
At the town hall they're laughed down the stairs when they inquire for work. The Hansa clerks are polite but not forthcoming with jobs. The Medici take one look at the heroes' clothes and close the door.
Annoyed as they are they poke around the various traders in the markets. An old pharmacist pulls them aside and shows them a purse with 7 golden florins that could be theirs.
Eduard's eyes glitter. "Ok, who do we kill?"
"Hopefully no one," the pharmacist says, laughing. "But there is a special ingredient I have need of. Hyoscyamus. I hear a sage dwarf has some."
"A dwarf?" Geldgraf says. He does a bad job of hiding his disbelief.
"A dwarf."
"And he's going to give us that stuff?"
"You'll know when you get there."
"Uhuh," Eduard says. "Where is this . . . dwarf?"
"Near Bamberg," the pharmacist says. "Southwest of the city if my news are correct."
"You're aware," Geldgraf says, "that it's quite a bit of walking you ask of us?"
"You're aware," the pharmacist replies, "that it's quite a bit of money I'm offering you? Do what you like. If you come back within a reasoable amount of time with the ingredient, I will pay you."
"We promise nothing," Eduard says. "Weirdo," he adds under his breath.
"I heard that," the old man shouts behind them.
The group goes to mass in a small church and offers a few alms to the poor. They also head to the Herz Jesu Kirche where Martinus decides to learn about St. Moses the Black.
"So, Bamberg, huh?" Geldgraf finally says as the group walks through the narrow streets of the city.
"Never know what opportunities are on the road," Eduard says.
"Yeah," Martinus says. "I guess."
Good stuff :)
Quote from: Syt on October 23, 2011, 01:36:54 PM
Martinus decides to learn about St. Moses the Black.
Didn't know Martinus was into large scary Africans. :P
Enjoying this a lot, Syt. Please continue. :)
:D
I think I never played that game. I might give it a try sometime. Sounds interesting.
Quote from: Zanza on October 23, 2011, 04:07:27 PM
I think I never played that game. I might give it a try sometime. Sounds interesting.
It's almost entirely text-based with some DOS-like graphic for combat. I don't think it is playable for someone just trying it today for a first time, but good luck.
It boggles my mind why they have never remade it. It's an instant classic imo.
Good show! I remember this fondly, especially sending off to Microprose to get the update disk so it didn't crash when the bomb-throwing terrorist alchemists ran amok.
The four pour over a map of the Empire. The most direct route to Bamberg would lead through the hills of the Harz and the Thüringer Wald.
"We could avoid the Harz, at least, if we go via Leipzig," Martinus suggests.
"Or we could bypass both if we go by ways of Paderborn and Kassel," B suggests.
"The chick has a point," Eduard says. "It's almost October, and in my age I don't want to climb those hills in rain and wind. Paderborn it is."
"And if you get tired I can massage your feet," Martinus says.
"Do we have to take the creep with us?" Geldgraf asks.
"For now," Eduard says. "B seems quite fond of him."
They cross the Elbe near Hamburg on the 27th of September. On the 30th they see a strange place - twisted and gnarled trees, everything seems blackened and evil, some spots are ashen, and the animals are threatening. It's the general consensus that the place causes too much pants crapping and instead they move on.
On the road they meet a bishop and his party. They pay their respects, and the bishop asks for a tithe to "ensure God's protection of the road."
Geldgraf is about to say something, but B gives the pfennig the church demands.
Further down the road, refugees from a plague stricken village trundle up the road. Eduard and B agree that the right thing to do is help these poor bastards and offer them three pfennig, about as much as they can spare.
They've just walked a few more paces, when suddenly . . .
The members of the band scream like little girls and try to run from the Tatzelwurm, but it's too fast. They have to fight!
When the dust settles, the group check each other for scratches.
"I'm fine," Geldgraf says.
"Me too," B says.
"No scratch!" Martinus looks visibly relieved.
"I . . . ," Eduard begins. The others look worried at their knightly lader. "I'm a bit winded but fine. The age, you know?"
"Jerk," Geldgraf says.
They carve up some meat from the wurm for a meal, then move on.
The band is still a bit from their next waypoint, Hanover, when they meet pilgrims on their way. They are headed in the same direction, so they decide to escort the pilgrims. They're slowed down, but still - on noon of October 6th they reach the city gates of Hanover.
They band is very much out of money by now, so they decide to stay for a week and earn a bit of coin with their respective crafts. It's not a big sum, but it will pay for a few visits to inns on the way. On the 14th of October, they continue their journey.
:thumbsup:
The journey on the road is uneventful. They pass the village of Bückeburg, but the most remarkable thing about it how unremarkable it is. "What a dung heap," Geldgraf says.
Further along the road they find Sternberg keep. The peasants don't mention anything of note, and the castle lord refuses to receive the band.
On 18th October they see a caravan under attack by bandits.
"There's quite a few of those fannies," Martinus says.
B shakes her head. "We can't watch these poor people get slaughtered."
"I agree," Eduard says. "Besides, there might be a reward for us."
Geldgraf nods. "And loot!"
The fight is a messy affair, eight bandits against our valiant heroes. In the end, the Languish band stands no chance. Eduard lasts longest, bashed on by six bandits.
When the group comes to, the fight is long over. The bandits left them for dead, though they were only badly wounded. Fortunately, the bandits were busy slaughtering and robbing the caravan, so they at least left the group their equipment and coin.
They limp to the nearby village of Höxter where they lick their wounds for a spell.
"We can't stay here for free," B says. The group agrees to pay the villagers a groschen per day for their care.
"I don't want to be negative," Martinus finally says, but we should get ourselves to Paderborn, it's only two days from here. And we can earn some coin there, while we regain our strength!
Geldgraf and Eduard hate to admit it, but it's a sound plan.
On the road they meet a wandering preacher who reminds everyone how sinful just being in existence and drawing air is. He offers absolvance for but a groschen. The crew count their coins: two groschen. "Screw you and your extortion," Martinus says.
Geldgraf flips the old weirdo the bird.
The preacher curses them for everyone to hear, and indeed, the band lose some of their endurance and divine favor.
"Good work, guys," Eduard says.
They arrive in Paderborn, famed for its swordmiths, on the 27th of October. Eduard tries to buddy up with the guards like in Lübeck, but they shrug him off. Grudgingly, they pay the toll to enter the city.
It's November 23rd when the last wounds are healed.
"We've lost four weeks," Eduard says.
"Because you wanted to be the altruistic one," Geldgraf reminds him.
"You think it makes sense to go after that dwarf near Bamberg?" Eduard says, trying to change the subject.
"No idea," Martinus said.
"Didn't expect you to have one," Geldgraf says. He ignores B's angry look.
"I suggest we stay here a bit longer," Eduard says. "I bet this town has its share of bandits. We kill some of them, make a name in the city, and then try to cuddle with the local big wigs to get us a job that isn't a fool's errand."
Martinus looks hopeful.
"Not that kind of cuddling" Geldgraf says. "Perv."
:cool:
The crew starts on the first night at the docks of Paderborn. They run into thieves soon enough and dispatch them easily. B is a bit scratched, but the group, confident thanks to their success decides to check a few more side streets.
In the crafts distrct they run into more thieves. They're as easily killed, but when the fight is over, the guys notice that B doesn't move.
"Think that cut is bad?" Geldgraf asks.
"The one from which all that blood is seeping?" Martinus replies.
"No, the one through which her entrails hang out."
Eduard sighs. "Guess we need a new healer."
Oooh! Ooh! :w00t:
In the Domhof inn, the three meet a huge, lumbering country lout. He's very charming, in his own way, and claims he can hold his own with edge and bow. His name is Karl Stiefel, though his nickname is the pretentiously Latin Caliga.
Unfortunately, he doesn't bring any equipment. The group star working in town. It seems like a sensible way to spend the winter. They earn some coin, and soon Karl is decked out in leather armor, armed with a short bow and a handy axe. It's March when they start cleaning out the streets of Paderborn again.
It's arduous work, and takes some patching up to do in between, but in April they've made such a name for themselves that they are granted an audience with the Bishop of Paderborn, lord of the city.
He confesses that the town is plagued by a robber knight who has his keep in the East. He begs the Languish band to rid his town of this scourge.
The four decide to head east and scout the lands. Near the village of Höxter they hear rumors of the robber knight's henchmen prowling the woods.
"I say, we ambush them!" Karl suggest. "I know these forests well enough to hide us."
The four spend almost a week before a band of unruly knights approaches them. They attack!
The band of bandits is killed easily enough, with only minor wounds to our heroes.
"That was easy," Eduard says.
"Too easy," Geldgraf says.
"Alright, how about we sell their stuff in town, rest up a bit and then pay that obber knight a visit in his keep?"
They travel back to Paderborn where they sell their loot and fix their wounds. On their way there they're attacked by a few wild boars. The dive into cover, only Martinus gets hit.
"Don't get me wrong, but this feels like a bad omen," Karl says.
On May 2nd, 1401 they stand in front of the knight's keep. They ponder their options and decide that single combat would be the best idea.
The bandit lord agrees . . . then brings half a dozen henchmen with him!
Karl fells one with his bow, but then the melee begins. One by one the Languishers are cut down. Martinus is killed by a sword cut to his face. The others survive, badly wounded. The robbers take all their possessions, all their money and kick them into the street.
"Motherfuckers," Geldgraf steams, "You haven't seen the last of us!"
The limp back towards Paderborn to gather their strength.
On their way a highway robber/alchemist ties to extort any alchemistic supplies fromm them. It's all Caliga and Eduard can do to restrain Geldgraf from killing the man.
They reach Paderborn on the 5th and walk up to the gates. It's here that they realize that they have no coin.
"No problem," says Karl and appraches the guards.
He returns a few moments later. "No beggars, he said."
"I'll get us in," Geldgraf says. "Just blend in with the crowd.
A guard spots Caliga who's a head taller than most of the people streaming through the gate. "Hey, I told you to beat it!"
Eduard frowns. "Ok, options?"
"Climbing the walls?" Geldgraf suggests?
"Going through the sewers?" Karl offers.
"Sewers seems safer," Eduard says.
They stand in front of the grate. Karl pulls with all his might, but he can't pry it loose.
"This is one of those days ," Eduard says.
They decide to try their luck with the walls. They actually make it, even Karl.
As they dust themselves off, they notice someone clearing their throat behind them. Thieves!
The three, unarmored and unarmed, make a run for it. Eventually, they end up in a dead end and have to surrender. When the thieves catch up with them, they look at the ragged three, barefooted, clothes torn, and just laugh before disappearing into the night.
The three hide out in a small grve till daybreak. Time to reconsider their options. They need to patch up, they need money and equipment. And they need a new member for their party.
They meet a master craftsman, a bit down on his luck after a failed business venture. He just mumbles something about "chain reaction" and "uncontrollable."
His name is Herrmann Hirner, called Hirn, a tinkerer from the north. He looks at the three and says, "Shoot, it's not like I have anything to lose."
It's June 1st that everyone is healthy again, and the band can go about earning money for new equipment.
I got a good feeling about this crew.
I'll say it again: love it.
After two weeks of toiling in Paderborn's sweatshops, Eduard is frustrated. "At this rate it'll take us a year to get ourselves equiepped again!"
"So what do you suggest?" Karl asks.
"I say we got to Cologne," Hirn says. "It's the biggest city in the Empire. They're bound to pay a bit better than the peasants here!"
"Aye, screw these fuckers!" Geldgraf says.
"Yeah, but without weapons or anything," Karl says, "how are we going to travel there?"
"Easy," Eduard says. "By boat."
So they sail down the Lippe river to Duisburg, and from there on to Cologne where they arrive in early July 1401.
Afer a few days of manual labor, Geldgraf comes back to the Inn after his shift on the city militia. "You know, these guys ain't paying any better than the Paderborn folk."
Eduard grimaces. "Not only that, but all the shit here is expensive. I tallied our coin, and we're spending it exactly as fast as we're earning it."
"Whose idea to come here was it again?" Karl asks.
"So how about this Koblenz place up the river I keep hearing about?" Hirn asks.
They travel onwards, but in Koblenz things are't any better.
"Trier, then?" Hirn asks.
On the boat ride there, the band is attacked in the night by river pirates. They try to escape into the dark, but the thieves catch them and steal all their money. They make it to Trier, but now they're without cash in a town where their cost of living exceeds the money they earn. With 6 pfennigs left, they ponder their options.
Seems there's only one option left. And it's as hot as my pants!
"We've had it pretty nice in Paderborn," Geldgraf says.
"At least we were respected there," Karl says.
"You know we have to walk there, right?" Eduard says.
"We could also stay here and starve to death?" Hirn says.
So they start on the long hike to Paderborn, by way of Mainz, Franfurt and Kassel. It's a refreshingly uneventful journey. Only once Karl has protect them from attacking wolves. Twice they run into bandits. The first time Karl manages to bluff them into running away, the second time the bandits just laugh when they see the band has no money.
It's now August 20th, 1401, and the party is back to square one.
:)
This is fantastic, Syt. I loved Darklands. I've contemplated rebuying it since it's now on GOG.com - this AAR has pushed me over the edge. Thank you. :)
Martinus :cry:
Who is Hirn btw? I didn't get that one. :outback:
Quote from: Martinus on October 30, 2011, 06:04:18 PM
Martinus :cry:
Who is Hirn btw? I didn't get that one. :outback:
I assumed it was The Brain for some reason, not too sure now that I look back.
My conspiracy theory is that Eduard stabbed Tim and Martinus in the back. Repeatedly.
In Deutsch, "Brain" ist "Hirn".
Quote from: Ed Anger on October 30, 2011, 06:30:58 PM
My conspiracy theory is that Eduard stabbed Tim and Martinus in the back. Repeatedly.
What about B? Did he fuck her corpse?
Dam you Syt, I MUST resist buying yet another game, even if it's just 6 bucks. :P
Very cool AAR
Great AAR, I'm tempted to buy it, even if I don't have enough time to play it. :(
:cool:
Darklands, I remember it fondly. Fun game!
AAR is on hiatus, till work situation becomes less busy again.
I've heard much of this game but never actually played it.
How does it hold up? Is it as impossible to get into as Dwarf Fortress? I have always been sorely tempted and a version that runs on a modern computer with no bother....hmm....
oh, and
Quote
B has already made up her mind, though. She has spotted a fabulously dressed priest at a neighbouring table. He seems a bit shy, for he constantly looks down, at people's feet. She walks over, talks to him and then returns with him to the table.
"This is Martinus Kochastop," she says and smiles.
"What kind of a stupid name is that?" Geldgraf asks.
"He's not from here," B says.
tee-hee