How do I lose 5 pounds in 7 days?

[garbon]

Max approves of the cosmo recommendations.

[The Larch]

I don't particularly care if it's fat or water or my left leg. I just don't want to get socked with an extra $60 - $100 in "penalties" because of this.

Google how boxers and other athletes "make weight" before a big fight.  They can lose 5 pounds or more or water.

None of it sounds real pleasant though.  I question whetehr it would be worth it for $60 to $100.

A friend of my brother used to be on taekwondo competitions when he was a kid. Anytime he was a kilo or two over his weight class limit he'd spend the whole day before official weighting just jogging up and down the hotel corridors while wearing lots of thick clothes. Then as soon as he got weighted he'd drink it all back.

[merithyn]

Meri Max approves of the cosmo recommendations.

[HVC]

guess no one wants to take my laxative advice

[garbon]

guess no one wants to take my laxative advice

Do you have a website?

[Darth Wagtaros]

Water tablets and vomiting after every other meal?

[Richard Hakluyt]

5lbs is equivalent to about 22,000 kcals so you can't really do it by dieting, so, as others have said, you need to dehydrate yourself.......that might not help for the rest of the physical though 

[mongers]

Can I say only in America ?   



It's a bit odd that 'the system' can result in someone having to think about unpleasant dietary activity or even do something unheathly, just to avoid being screwed over by their own employer. 

[merithyn]

Can I say only in America ?   

It's a bit odd that 'the system' can result in someone having to think about unpleasant dietary activity or even do something unheathly, just to avoid being screwed over by their own employer.

Yeah, pretty much.

[mongers]

Can I say only in America ?   

It's a bit odd that 'the system' can result in someone having to think about unpleasant dietary activity or even do something unheathly, just to avoid being screwed over by their own employer.

Yeah, pretty much.

I'm not suggesting this as an answer, as I know you can't cycle, but bicycle seems to be a moderately pleasant way of loosing weight temporarily.

Yesterday I did some not very energetic riding in midly warm temperatures, not much above 70, and going by what I weigh this afternoon, I'd probably lost 3-4 pounds due to water loss.

I say it's not unpleasant, because the exercise is heating you up, but the airflow really aids cooling, so you don't feel hot and bothered; you'll finish the exercise not exhausted, not covered in sweat, but having lost a fair amount of weight.

[lustindarkness]

Last time I had a stomach virus I lost more than 5 lbs in like 3 days. But no fun.

[MadImmortalMan]

I think 5 pounds is too much for a week, yes. Severe caloric restriction or fasting would have to be in the mix, plus dehydration. Maybe have four or five vodkas the day before the physical to cause a water flush. That can shed a couple pounds overnight. All this sounds dangerous to me. Don't wear heavy shoes?

[Richard Hakluyt]

Conceal several helium-filled balloons on your person  ?

[merithyn]

Conceal several helium-filled balloons on your person  ?

   

Brilliant!

[Malthus]

Conceal several helium-filled balloons on your person  ?

1. Insert nozzle from helium tank in anus

...

3. Profit!