Best and worst crimes for employment?

[OttoVonBismarck]

Yeah, I don't know if the Eurotards are confused or just stupid (well, I know Martim is just stupid and Marti is 90% troll), but almost none of these crimes result in any incarceration time for a first offense. Many of them won't even result in a physical arrest at the time of offense, but just a citation, some of them you might get taken into the police department but just long enough to get processed and released with instructions on when to come back for a hearing.

DWI is probably the only one these days that is likely, out of that list, to definitely have some incarceration time. The laws (rightfully, really) have gotten more serious on DUI/DWI which used to be viewed as a minor insignificant crime. Most states now require something stupid like 24 hours incarceration for a first time DWI/DUI just to "make it hit home" that the person has done something really bad. However, a lot of times you can serve that 24 hours through community service, and you can get your lawyer to convince the court to count any amount of time you were in police custody against the 24 hours (so if it takes 3-4 hours to book you and sober you up, you only owe 20 hours.)

I should also mention a lot of these crimes you really have to be stupid to get cited. Any of the "fighting with cops" offenses you basically have to go into the situation intent on getting charged. For solicitation, just trust me when I say that anyone with half a brain would never get caught in a prostitution sting. DWI/DUI is a little dicier, because if you drink and you have a driver's license and you ever drive with any alcohol in you, then you're subjecting yourself to the potential for one--but on the other hand everyone I know with a DUI/DWI drove shitfaced drunk 100+ times before getting their first arrest.

[Iormlund]

The latest statistic I saw is that is that 1 in 4 adults in the U.S. has a criminal record of some sort.

Sweet baby Jesus ... 

[DGuller]

The latest statistic I saw is that is that 1 in 4 adults in the U.S. has a criminal record of some sort.

Sweet baby Jesus ... 

Don't worry, these people will never see the inside of the office, except the welfare office.  They won't be able to hurt anyone there.

[Malthus]

Yeah, I don't know if the Eurotards are confused or just stupid (well, I know Martim is just stupid and Marti is 90% troll), but almost none of these crimes result in any incarceration time for a first offense. Many of them won't even result in a physical arrest at the time of offense, but just a citation, some of them you might get taken into the police department but just long enough to get processed and released with instructions on when to come back for a hearing.

DWI is probably the only one these days that is likely, out of that list, to definitely have some incarceration time. The laws (rightfully, really) have gotten more serious on DUI/DWI which used to be viewed as a minor insignificant crime. Most states now require something stupid like 24 hours incarceration for a first time DWI/DUI just to "make it hit home" that the person has done something really bad. However, a lot of times you can serve that 24 hours through community service, and you can get your lawyer to convince the court to count any amount of time you were in police custody against the 24 hours (so if it takes 3-4 hours to book you and sober you up, you only owe 20 hours.)

I should also mention a lot of these crimes you really have to be stupid to get cited. Any of the "fighting with cops" offenses you basically have to go into the situation intent on getting charged. For solicitation, just trust me when I say that anyone with half a brain would never get caught in a prostitution sting. DWI/DUI is a little dicier, because if you drink and you have a driver's license and you ever drive with any alcohol in you, then you're subjecting yourself to the potential for one--but on the other hand everyone I know with a DUI/DWI drove shitfaced drunk 100+ times before getting their first arrest.

It is true that these crimes would generally not result in jail time, but what I'm reading in this thread is that, apparently, if employers find out about them many if not most of them result in more or less permanent unemployability (aside from menial occupations).

That seems a rather harsher punishment than doing a little time. Also, socially unproductive, as it artifically narrows the employment pool.

[Valmy]

Sweet baby Jesus ... 

We have lots of laws.  Not being a criminal takes some work.

[garbon]

The latest statistic I saw is that is that 1 in 4 adults in the U.S. has a criminal record of some sort.

Sweet baby Jesus ... 

According to MSil - 99% of the Portuguese population (if not hire) would have a criminal record in a civilized country.

[OttoVonBismarck]

It is true that these crimes would generally not result in jail time, but what I'm reading in this thread is that, apparently, if employers find out about them many if not most of them result in more or less permanent unemployability (aside from menial occupations).

That seems a rather harsher punishment than doing a little time. Also, socially unproductive, as it artifically narrows the employment pool.

Yeah, but I don't know that it's really like that. If you have any sort of financial crime on your record that bars you from a lot of positions. Any sex offense likewise (that's a known thing, though.)

Drugs and DWI, at least in my personal experience (which includes active duty military, then civilian DoD, now civilian ICE...few menial jobs as a kid) don't really bar employment. I have many friends who work for Fortune 500 companies who have booze or drug offenses. I'm not talking drug dealing or such, but minor possession charges, single offense DWI and etc.

I won't pretend to know about all employers but I know enough about hiring forms at government agencies (both state / federal) and fortune 500 companies that I'll tell you this is a good cross section of what usually gets asked:

1. Have you ever been convicted of a crime? (Worst for a convict.)
2. Have you ever been convicted of a felony? (Bad for felons, everyone else is good.)
3. Have you been convicted of a crime in the past x (often 7) years? (Bad for anyone who has fucked up recently)
4. Have you been convicted of a felony in the past x (often 7) years (Bad for anyone who has really fucked up recently)
5. Have you ever been convicted or arrested for a crime? (Very bad for anyone who has messed up at all.)

Then the whole "arrested" question might have some qualifiers like (in the past x years, or etc.)

Just to put in perspective, I have a friend who left the chemical industry and went to work for the Department of the Navy working on a classified project. He's a chemical engineer. During his first year's probationary period he was visiting a friend in Arlington and they went out to a bar and got shitfaced drunk then got separated. He went back to his friend's house and his friend wouldn't come to the door so he angrily broke the door down to get inside (he was supposed to be staying with the friend.) He then passes out inside the house.

The police are called because it wasn't his friend who wouldn't unlock the door, and he in fact drunkenly broke into some old ladies house (who fortunately was not there.) He was initially charged with two felonies (one for the breaking and entering and one for felony destruction of a historical landmark...the house was on the national register of historic sites or whatever.)

He got one of the felonies removed and had to plead to a misdemeanor. Note this is a guy undergoing a probationary period at a job that requires a top secret clearance. He speaks to the guy in charge of security at his work site and he is told "well, this is a problem if it becomes a pattern of behavior, but in and of itself as long as this is a one time thing you have nothing to worry about."

He's been working there 8 years now.

Basically some of these misdemeanors hurt you, but I think some Languishites (like Cal or Garbon) are making it look like it's harder to get employed with a misdemeanor than it actually is. Maybe it is where they work, but that's not typical for the entire workforce.

[Iormlund]

According to MSil - 99% of the Portuguese population (if not hire) would have a criminal record in a civilized country.

Civilized?

Some of the things on that list are so silly I can't think of a single person I know who would have a clear record. Open container?

[PDH]

UWyo asks about felonies and sex-offenses, nothing else.

The moral of the story is to not get caught in the little things.

[garbon]

According to MSil - 99% of the Portuguese population (if not hire) would have a criminal record in a civilized country.

Civilized?

Some of the things on that list are so silly I can't think of a single person I know who would have a clear record. Open container?

Cherry pick though (MSil took umbrage with almost everything on the list) / all of these aren't general as my mother's boyfriend's son got cited for open container underage and I don't think that was a misdemeanor.

[Iormlund]

It's not just the booze thing (though it is the most salient example). There's also possession, solicitation, shoplifting or minor speeding.

[Admiral Yi]

It's not just the booze thing (though it is the most salient example). There's also possession, solicitation, shoplifting or minor speeding.

Do you think it's normal that shoplifting just get shrugged away?  I think that's bizarre.

[garbon]

It's not just the booze thing (though it is the most salient example). There's also possession, solicitation, shoplifting or minor speeding.

Do you think it's normal that shoplifting just get shrugged away?  I think that's bizarre.

Right that strikes me as odd.

On the minor speeding that strikes me as an anomaly as I've never been charged with a misdemeanor when speeding under <15 mph.

[CountDeMoney]

Some of the things on that list are so silly I can't think of a single person I know who would have a clear record. Open container?

You have to be a pretty simple fuck getting caught with an open container.  Only time that happens is if you're pulled over in a vehicle with it, or you're moron enough for a public intoxication rap.
In either case, go to a bar or go home.  Don't be a public drunken twat.

Pretty simple to avoid, really.  All of these "crimes" are pretty simple to avoid, and that's the point.

[Monoriu]

Some of the things on that list are so silly I can't think of a single person I know who would have a clear record. Open container?

Me?  I haven't done any of the things on that list, so it isn't a matter of not getting caught.