Barrister's obnoxious thread full of smug parenting stories

[sbr]

  How old is Carl?

[Malthus]

  How old is Carl?

He's six - he will be seven in December.

His main interests so far appear to be knights and ninjas. 

I asked him if the king in the story was a good guy or a bad guy. He said, "he's a king. Wanting gold is what kings do".

[Ed Anger]

Teach him the D&D alignment system.

[Razgovory]

Christ, he's already nerd.

[Malthus]

Christ, he's already nerd.

On the other hand, he's also very into sports. He's playing real hockey now. Which is more than I ever did. 

[Barrister]

So Timmy has a very set routine for saying goodbye and saying goodnight.  We give him a hug, a kiss (usually on the lips, sometimes on the forehead), and a high five.

We were at a big family gathering all day yesterday.  When it was time to start getting ready to leave, we tell Timmy to say goodbye (because of course all the aunties love getting hugs and kisses from toddlers).  Except he turns away from one Great Auntie, and turns to a 3-4 year old second cousin he's been playing with during the day.  He goes to him and gives him a hug - cousin looks at him funny.  He goes to give him a high five - the two boys kind of flail their arms around, but eventually manage to connect.

Then Timmy wants to give him a kiss.  Little cousin wants nothing to do with a kiss, and pulls away.  It degenerates into the Timmy chasing his little cousin around a sofa several times going "Kiss! Kiss!".


Sooner or later we'll have to teach him some restrictions on PDAs, but at 2 it's just cute.

[Ed Anger]

I dread the twins playing soccer (church league thing). First, 4 and 5 year olds don't know how to play. Blue shirted mob attacks yellow shirt mob. Second, My kids treat fouls like personal insults that must be avenged. Third, the coach (a nice guy but a doofus) insists on splitting them up on the field. Play starts, they both leave their "position" and merge into this killing machine within the blue mob. Fourth, Katerina wants to pick the ball up and run over people.

PRAY FOR ME.

[CountDeMoney]

Shit, when my littlest niece started playing soccer at 4, she'd trail off from the action, picking dandelions and taking them to my mother on the sideline in the middle of the game.

[Barrister]

Shit, when my littlest niece started playing soccer at 4, she'd trail off from the action, picking dandelions and taking them to my mother on the sideline in the middle of the game.

My parents tell me that when I was in the field in t-ball I'd sit down and start picking at the dandelions, and not be bothered if a ball rolled by me.

[Ed Anger]

Shit, when my littlest niece started playing soccer at 4, she'd trail off from the action, picking dandelions and taking them to my mother on the sideline in the middle of the game.

That stuff happens in the 2nd half.  They get tired of it all and just wander around. Or the DADDY IS GETTING US ICE CREAM AFTER THE GAME trigger hits and they just start killing time. Or if a cat comes near the field, kitty must be petted.

[Razgovory]

Shit, when my littlest niece started playing soccer at 4, she'd trail off from the action, picking dandelions and taking them to my mother on the sideline in the middle of the game.

My parents tell me that when I was in the field in t-ball I'd sit down and start picking at the dandelions, and not be bothered if a ball rolled by me.

I couldn't even hit the ball when it was on the tee.

[sbr]

I was pretty good at t-ball.  Things went downhill once the other kids starting throwing the ball at me.  Go up there with a bat?  Can I take the catcher's gear instead?

[CountDeMoney]

My mother pulled me out of Little League because I got a D in Math.  Who knows, I may have developed a wicked curveball with a backdoor slider as a lefty.  We'll never know BECAUSE FRACTIONS WERE MORE FUCKING IMPORTANT

[Syt]

I was interested in joining the local football club when I was a kid, but my parents said it was too expensive, what with membership fees and having to buy the equipment. We were: poor.

[Martinus]

So Timmy has a very set routine for saying goodbye and saying goodnight.  We give him a hug, a kiss (usually on the lips, sometimes on the forehead), and a high five.

We were at a big family gathering all day yesterday.  When it was time to start getting ready to leave, we tell Timmy to say goodbye (because of course all the aunties love getting hugs and kisses from toddlers).  Except he turns away from one Great Auntie, and turns to a 3-4 year old second cousin he's been playing with during the day.  He goes to him and gives him a hug - cousin looks at him funny.  He goes to give him a high five - the two boys kind of flail their arms around, but eventually manage to connect.

Then Timmy wants to give him a kiss.  Little cousin wants nothing to do with a kiss, and pulls away.  It degenerates into the Timmy chasing his little cousin around a sofa several times going "Kiss! Kiss!".


Sooner or later we'll have to teach him some restrictions on PDAs, but at 2 it's just cute.

Another "where did he get that from" moment.

Tracy was cleaning the kitchen.  Timmy takes a biscuit cutter, puts it on his head, and says "I'm a princess!".

Do you see me saying anything? No. Nothing. Zitch. Nada.