Barrister's obnoxious thread full of smug parenting stories

[Ed Anger]

Cassandra decided this morning to talk about the devil. As in asking me why Jesus doesn't just beat the devil up.

I had no real answer for that.  I said ask the Sunday school teacher.

[Grey Fox]

Because he preaches love, no? I'm not sure, I'm the atheist here.

Also, I love your kids penchant for violence has the solution to any and all problems.

America, the beautiful.

[Valmy]

Because he preaches love, no? I'm not sure, I'm the atheist here.

Also, I love your kids penchant for violence has the solution to any and all problems.

America, the beautiful.

Your kid is going to go strike everytime she has a problem isn't she?  'Gret Fox: unfair on chores'

[Ed Anger]

It's a hard world out there. Be prepared.

[Grey Fox]

Because he preaches love, no? I'm not sure, I'm the atheist here.

Also, I love your kids penchant for violence has the solution to any and all problems.

America, the beautiful.

Your kid is going to go strike everytime she has a problem isn't she?  'Gret Fox: unfair on chores'

She already does, Lays on the floor. She hasn't figured the flopping yet.

[Ed Anger]

Soccer game, dutiful baptists v. Methodist devil worshipers. Katerina scores a goal and proceeds to do a John Starks like chest thumping. I think I need to cut out letting them watch old sports with me.

I loved it however. 

[PRC]

I wanted to chat about pets and kids...

My son is now close to four months old and we have a couple of cats, an unrelated male and female who have been together since they were kittens.  The Lady of the House refuses to let the cats outside "because they will die". 

I grew up in a household that always had dogs and cats... and both of 'em were always welcome inside but the animals always seemed to live in the "now of outside" where being outside meant running in circles, chasing squirrels, birds, mice and other enemies and basically outside is where the action was, except when it was cold.

My obvious concern is the cats jumping in the crib while our boy is sleeping and in their protective wisdom deciding to lay across his face to keep warm and go to sleep.  That hasn't really been an issue but our male cat does love to sleep in the crib. 

A cool thing is that when our boy cries out in distress both of our cats, wherever they are in the house, come running and show real protective instinct.  They get close to him if he is on the floor.  They flash around when he cries, always trying to get a look at what the issue is.  If i'm standing and holding our boy our female cat will literally jump on my shoulders to get close and the male will stand on his hind legs and reach up me for a hug with his front legs. 

That protectiveness from our pets has been amazing to observe.

[Syt]

Soccer game, dutiful baptists v. Methodist devil worshipers. Katerina scores a goal and proceeds to do a John Starks like chest thumping. I think I need to cut out letting them watch old sports with me.

I loved it however. 

May start to look weird when she hits puberty.

[Scipio]

You new Daddies have so much fun in front of you, man.

So my sister shows up at the "first week" PTA meeting last night for the youngest one's class, starting first grade.

My sister is then approached by concerned parents, wanting to know what was wrong with McKinley, as apparently she had gone to the nurse's office on the first day of school, complaining about an earache.  Was checked out, and sent back to class;  now my sister knew this already. 

What she didn't know was that McKinley returned to class and told all her friends that she is going to have to see a doctor for her earache, at which time:
1) her throat will have to be "ripped open with knives",
2) her lungs will have to be "pulled out and emptied", and
3) her heart will have to "be fixed", since "it is sick".

This one's so going to steal a car when she's 14.

That's what happens when you name your child after an Ohioan who was assassinated to make way for the most badass president since Washington.

[Barrister]

My obvious concern is the cats jumping in the crib while our boy is sleeping and in their protective wisdom deciding to lay across his face to keep warm and go to sleep.  That hasn't really been an issue but our male cat does love to sleep in the crib. 

Cats should not be allowed in the crib.  We close the door to baby's room when he's sleeping, in part to keep out the cat.

[Ed Anger]

I think I'm going to have to pull the kids from soccer. It isn't the NFL, ponytail division.

[katmai]

I think I'm going to have to pull the kids from soccer. It isn't the NFL, ponytail division.

You make Andy Carroll cry.

[Ed Anger]

I think I'm going to have to pull the kids from soccer. It isn't the NFL, ponytail division.

You make Andy Carroll cry.

They would kick Andy's ass. Especially thier friend Brooke aka the rabid wolverine.

[Barrister]

We're looking into music lessons for Timmy.

Hockey can wait till he's 5.

[sbr]

My Aunt (Dad;s sister) bought me a drum set when I was 5-6 years old.  My parents were not pleased and saved it in the attic for about 10 years until my Aunt had her first kid and then they gave it back.

It was pretty sweet, the bass drum had a picture of Mickey Mouse.