Household chores as a kid

[merithyn]

When I was a pre-teen oh so long ago, my mom separated our house into three different jobs: living room & dining room, bathroom, and kitchen. She then assigned each of us one of those jobs with the expectation that it be done before she got home from work. We balked at the idea at first, but we really had no choice, so we did the chores. None of us liked them, but seriously, who does like household chores? My godmother had a similar program at her place, but because we were quite small when we lived there, we only had to dust and vacuum.

With my four kids, I started doing the same thing when the eldest two were around 10 years old, though I've included several other jobs into the mix, and added Max and my names into the rotation as they've gotten elder. Every week, things rotate, which means that someone can go five weeks without having to do a single dish, etc. The system is meant to teach the kids every aspect of keeping house, and to move things around so that no one is stuck doing the really crap job all the time.

I recently found out that this is an "odd" concept to some friends of ours. They have 11-year-old twin boys whose only jobs are to take out the trash and to load the dishwasher. The parents do everything else, mostly because they want it done a certain way and they don't want to fight the boys to get things done properly. In addition, apparently my ex-husband's wife does ALL of the housework at his house, and the kids aren't expected to lift a finger except to keep their bedrooms picked up.

Am I unusual in the idea that the house is a family place, therefore it's the entire family's responsibility to take care of it?

And how will/have you handle(d) the concept of "chores" with your kids?

[Eddie Teach]

No, though I can understand why soft parents might choose to do 10 minutes of dishes over 20 minutes of arguing/nagging.

[katmai]

Yes, in my house with my father I was expected to do the chores(he was working 12hr days)

When was with my mother she would make me clean and take out garbage, but we rotated the dishes.

[merithyn]

No, though I can understand why soft parents might choose to do 10 minutes of dishes over 20 minutes of arguing/nagging.

It is 100 times easier to do it myself than to deal with the kids' over things, but what is that teaching them? So, I take the much harder (and very draining) road in order to teach them about responsibility. I'm rarely sure if it's sinking in, but at least I'm trying.

[garbon]

We did chores as a kid but it did always seem like many of our friends found the concept alien.

[HisMajestyBOB]

On even days, I had to set the silverware and napkins on the table, while my brother had to feed the dog; on odd days we swapped. We also had to vacuum and take out the garbage when told, which was fairly often. And often had to mow the lawn. And other things.

[Oexmelin]

Out of curiosity for those who answer, were there "boy" chores and "girl" chores ?

(For my part, it was standard to do things around the house - dishes, vacuum, dusting, etc. - but we didn't cook, unless it was a "family" affair).

[merithyn]

On even days, I had to set the silverware and napkins on the table, while my brother had to feed the dog; on odd days we swapped. We also had to vacuum and take out the garbage when told, which was fairly often. And often had to mow the lawn. And other things.

Wow. Our chore list includes:

• Living Room & Front Hall
• Dining Room & Garbage
• Bathroom & Cat Litter
• Dishes & Kitchen
• Laundry
• Plan, make and put away dinner

The chores include picking up, dusting, sweeping, organizing, wiping surfaces down as needed, etc., in each room. Basically... keeping house.

[Barrister]

We had various chores as a kid, but I have to admit at certain points my mother "gave up" and did a big chunk of them herself.

[garbon]

Wow. Our chore list includes:

• Living Room & Front Hall
• Dining Room & Garbage
• Bathroom & Cat Litter
• Dishes & Kitchen
• Laundry
• Plan, make and put away dinner

The chores include picking up, dusting, sweeping, organizing, wiping surfaces down as needed, etc., in each room. Basically... keeping house.

We did all of those except washing the laundry (until we were older). I think they thought we'd fuck it up.

[merithyn]

Out of curiosity for those who answer, were there "boy" chores and "girl" chores ?

(For my part, it was standard to do things around the house - dishes, vacuum, dusting, etc. - but we didn't cook, unless it was a "family" affair).

Once we were old enough to pretty much keep the house always picked up, the chores were separated into Garbage and Dishes. My brother took the garbage to the curb once a week, and my sister and I did the dishes every night... because that's what boys and girls did. 

I've never made the distinction in my house. Chores need to be done regardless of whether you have a penis or not.

[garbon]

Out of curiosity for those who answer, were there "boy" chores and "girl" chores ?

(For my part, it was standard to do things around the house - dishes, vacuum, dusting, etc. - but we didn't cook, unless it was a "family" affair).

Not in my house, but then we never had particularly strict gender roles.

[merithyn]

We did all of those except washing the laundry (until we were older). I think they thought we'd fuck it up.

Laundry and dinner are recent additions now that my youngest has turned 12.

[BuddhaRhubarb]

We had various chores as a kid, but I have to admit at certain points my mother "gave up" and did a big chunk of them herself.

I think this is the most common scenario. My mom often re-did things we thought we had done a great job on.

[HVC]

No set chore list, but i was told to do stuff like take out the trash, vacuum, shovel etc. at random times.