H.M. The King's Royal Guard

[Viking]

http://www.dagbladet.no/2011/04/13/nyheter/garden/innenriks/16176263/

I would laugh, but I must cry.

As part of the end of the tour of the present guard the guard staff decided to launch a surprise armed alert to demonstrate the Guards state of alert. These alerts are there to mobilize the guard in case of an emergency or attack on the Royal Palace.

So, they sounded the surprise alarm expecting all the guard to form up as they had practiced before. Now, enough Guardists turned out to to man all alarm stations, but a substantial number did not assemble and were found hiding in the toilets and under their beds as well as a few fleeing from the base barracks itself by fleeing over the outer fence.

This is so fucking embarrassing for the Norwegian Army. The members of the guard volunteer and compete for guard duty, but yet the guard seems to have no esprit de corps.

Something is rotten in the state of Norway. The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

[Habbaku]

This reminds me of the Sharpe movie in which Sharpe gets to deal with the Spanish royal guard...

Are those that were caught fleeing, etc., going to be severely punished?  Is that equivalent to desertion?

[Norgy]

The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.

[HVC]

The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.

Does the crown have a seperate security force (a la the secret service)?

[Viking]

This reminds me of the Sharpe movie in which Sharpe gets to deal with the Spanish royal guard...

Are those that were caught fleeing, etc., going to be severely punished?  Is that equivalent to desertion?

Probably nothing serious, though I expect they will either be discharged or moved to less "prestigious" units.

The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.

Does the crown have a seperate security force (a la the secret service)?

The Police provide personal security to the king, the government and visiting dignitaries.

The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.

Obviously they are not serious, but they are supposed to be a real unit in the army. They are supposed to be more than a marching band, honor guard and drill squad for state occasions and military tattoos. They are supposed to be one company of stood up infantry men, in addition to other duties.

[Norgy]

Obviously they are not serious, but they are supposed to be a real unit in the army. They are supposed to be more than a marching band, honor guard and drill squad for state occasions and military tattoos. They are supposed to be one company of stood up infantry men, in addition to other duties.

I think the ship sailed there when they started to compete for military tattoo honours.
Besides, king's guard duty is sought after because it's light duty in Oslo. Booze, women and pay? Most males around 20 would gladly do a bit of marching and wear a silly hat for that.

Not that I don't agree that they should in fact be a military unit, but seeing as we fail to even provide enough plumbers and carpenters, I don't see young men flocking to become lowly soldiers.

[Warspite]

I thought you guys would have a rotation system for ceremonial duty; our Guards and cavalry units do their time on Horseguards and outside Buckingham Palace, but they also mix it up in Afghanistan.

[jamesww]

I don't know the details, but I get the impression that the Guards infantrymen deployed at guard positions around London are supposed to be capable of reacting in an emergency. Though they may well not carry any ammunition, but would be promptly issued it from near at hand ? 

There's a barracks, whose name escapes me, in central London on birdcage walk, equidistant from Whitehall/Westminster and Buckingham palace , I'd be surprised if there weren't ready military assets there available to deploy if the police have a sudden serious crisis on their hands.

[Slargos]

I would've posted this, but I realized I've been ragging too much on the inept Norwegians lately. 

Norway really is a freak of a nation.

Norgy's excuses ring hollow. Having Guards soldiers hide under their beds during a call to arms is fucking embarrassing. 

Perhaps they can hire some Swedes instead. Seems if you need to get actual work done in this country, you can't turn to Norwegians.

[chipwich]

I fully expect a military marching band to die for their country at a moments notice.

Certain college marching bands too.

[Warspite]

I don't know the details, but I get the impression that the Guards infantrymen deployed at guard positions around London are supposed to be capable of reacting in an emergency. Though they may well not carry any ammunition, but would be promptly issued it from near at hand ? 

There's a barracks, whose name escapes me, in central London on birdcage walk, equidistant from Whitehall/Westminster and Buckingham palace , I'd be surprised if there weren't ready military assets there available to deploy if the police have a sudden serious crisis on their hands.

Wellington Barracks. I think the troops there are just out of training, though I know a Captain there, managing a lot of the ceremonial duties, who recently came back from deployment in Afghanistan. He said it was odd having gone from shooting at Taliban and eating dust all day long to incessantly polishing brass buttons and arranging road closures.

[derspiess]

WTF.  I would think that at that age you'd be going on pure adrenaline & ready for a fight if you thought the shit was hitting the fan.  Those cowards need to be purged from the ranks-- whatever their functional day-to-day role is, they're soldiers & should be expected to act as such.

[jamesww]

I don't know the details, but I get the impression that the Guards infantrymen deployed at guard positions around London are supposed to be capable of reacting in an emergency. Though they may well not carry any ammunition, but would be promptly issued it from near at hand ? 

There's a barracks, whose name escapes me, in central London on birdcage walk, equidistant from Whitehall/Westminster and Buckingham palace , I'd be surprised if there weren't ready military assets there available to deploy if the police have a sudden serious crisis on their hands.

Wellington Barracks. I think the troops there are just out of training, though I know a Captain there, managing a lot of the ceremonial duties, who recently came back from deployment in Afghanistan. He said it was odd having gone from shooting at Taliban and eating dust all day long to incessantly polishing brass buttons and arranging road closures.

Does the one enable the other ?

Funnily enough a couple of days ago I was talking with army veteran, who'd served in the middle east during the retreat from empire, and he made the point about what we might called the 'stupid shit' being absolutely necessary.

[Josquius]

Second paragraph made me laugh, was expecting them to be screw ups but wasn't expecting that.

[Darth Wagtaros]

I think the Union of Kalmar would have prevented this sad state of affairs.