The Cat Megathread

[Norgy]

My parents cat eat like a queen these last two days. She sure does like her seafood.

Mine's getting pick. Only lightly poached fillet of cod, please. I'm certainly glad I haven't spoiled him in any way. 

He got hit slightly by a car two weeks ago. Of course, I took him to the vet, and he had his x-rays taken. Nothing broken. He limps a bit still, which looks funny. Sort of like a furry Herr Flick of the Gestapo of 'Allo, 'allo. Incidentally, if you have a cat, and it hasn't had full anastethic yet, you're in for a treat when that happens. Wiping up cat vomit is just so entertaining. 

[Martinus]

I thought I'd share this:

[Eddie Teach]

The texting instead of reading rings true, but wouldn't she at least drink her cocktail? 

[HVC]

I think she's angrily waiting for likes.

[CountDeMoney]

Even Mr. Jingles said I'm the fuck outta here.

[Ed Anger]

The life of a Jezebel blogger.

[Admiral Yi]

It's only 8 o'clock.  Still plenty of time to go out and get some of that dick she desperately needs.

[CountDeMoney]

It's only 8 o'clock.  Still plenty of time to go out and get some of that dick she desperately needs.

Character question, Yi:  do you believe in granting mercy fucks at closing time?  Within acceptable female parameters, that is?

[Admiral Yi]

Within acceptable parameters generally means it's not a mercy fuck.

Short answer: I've never given a mercy fuck.

I've asked for one a couple times. 

[Norgy]

I've given quite a few in the past. 

[CountDeMoney]

Within acceptable parameters generally means it's not a mercy fuck.

Physically, yeah...but you know off the bat whether she's scrambled eggs or not.

Short answer: I've never given a mercy fuck.

I've asked for one a couple times. 

Yes, I suppose "ohpleaseohpleaseohplease" counts. 

[Martinus]

I have given a couple of mercy fucks, I suppose.

[CountDeMoney]

I bet you have, you dirty little slut.

[Admiral Yi]

Physically, yeah...but you know off the bat whether she's scrambled eggs or not.

We have agreed several times in the past that psycho chicks are the best lays.

[CountDeMoney]

Physically, yeah...but you know off the bat whether she's scrambled eggs or not.

We have agreed several times in the past that psycho chicks are the best lays.

Just give them Berkut's name.