TV/Movies Megathread

[Ideologue]

Actually, commercials don't bother me that much  I guess without 'em movie tickets would cost like $2 more.

[Ed Anger]

Is it common for theaters to show 25 minutes of commercials before the movie starts?

If I miss any previews, I get pissy.

I GOTS TO SEE MAH TWILIGHT PREVIEWS.

[Neil]

I thought it was an very fun movie. I am very glad my daughter begged me to watch it with her.


The stars were gorgeous, and they even had a few cast members who were rather average, which was kind of cool. Rebel Wilson was outstanding.

I thought it was a cute little movie, too.  It's normally not my fare, but it came on while I was playing WoT so I left it on.  I have an Anna Kendrick thing anyway, so that didn't hurt either.

My niece wants to see it, but I think it's still a bit risque for a 9 year old.

Anna Kendrick plays an unlikeable jerk in that movie.

[CountDeMoney]

I don't care;  she's got a great smile, and a lovely small mouth and Kennedyesque jawbones that would look wonderful unhinging like a snake to swallow my knob.

[Ideologue]

Which Kennedy?

[CountDeMoney]

Arnold.

[viper37]

NCIS

Sorry, Tiva 'shippers! Cote de Pablo, who played main character Ziva David, has opted not to return to CBS' hit police procedural in its 11th season, thus permanently crushing the hopes and dreams of fans who wanted her to hook up with leading man Tony DiNozzo. CBS boss Les Moonves said Pablo was offered "a lot of money" to stay in the role, but "ultimately she decided she didn't want to do the show" – though she will appear in two episodes next season to wrap up Ziva's story line. At the very least, we hope they'll put to bed (perhaps literally?) speculation about what really happened between Ziva and Tony in Paris!

Damn.  One of the main reasons to watch the show has just disapeared.  They might has well cancell it now.

[CountDeMoney]

NCIS 

[jimmy olsen]

A Disney movie was inaccurate!

http://www.slate.com/articles/health_and_science/science/2013/08/finding_nemo_and_finding_dory_clownfish_are_sex_changing_hermaphrodites.html

[Admiral Yi]

My biggest beef with Pitch Perfect was that it was supposed to be a capella singing competition but they beefed up all the songs with instrumentation.

[Ed Anger]

NCIS 

Unimpressed with Navy super cops? 

[Ed Anger]

I'd rail Cote De Pablo until a hole was ripped into the fabric of space.

[garbon]

NCIS 

Right I saw a mention of it the other day (I guess the guy who was once married/or engaged to Jessica Alba from Dark Angel is in it) and I was like excuse me?

[Ideologue]

Samurai Rebellion (1967).  Isaburo Sasahana (Toshiro Mifune) is forced to take his lord's former mistress into his household as his son's wife.  Against all odds, the two kids actually fall in love.  Then the lord demands that she come back.  Samurai rebellion ensues.  It's a slow, slow burn, as every possible political avenue is exhausted before the violence, but it's compelling because we know the violence is inevitable, they know the violence is inevitable, and it can erupt at any moment.  Shame that the violence is choreographed poorly.  For example, one guy who clearly has his head cut off, although he is obscured by Mifune's body in the shot, stands up before they cut.  Christ.  I know these movies weren't that expensive, and that reshoots are, but you really didn't notice that botched take?  Tatsuya Nakadai also stars.  He and Mifune fight for, I believe, the last time, and, man, that guy is like the Washington Generals of samurai films.  I love him.  B+

Hidden Fortress (1958).  These two fucking poors ruined this otherwise promising film.  You know what I don't remember from Star Wars?  The part where C3PO and R2D2 draw straws to see who gets to rape Princess Leia first.  C+

Hara-Kiri: Death of a Samurai (2012).  Remake of the 1960 classic (I guess), but this one was on Instant Watch, so I instantly watched it.  A ronin arrives at a castle asking permission to commit seppuku on their grounds; they tell him of a similar recent visitor, who was using the old samurai suicide bluff to extort a few ryo out of their coffers, and how they called his bluff and made him die.  But the ronin has a story to tell them, about why he has no intention of ever walking out these castle gates.

Features the most poverty I've ever seen on film: one of the featured ronin has just sold his sword to buy medicine and eggs for sick wife.  Some filthy urchin barrels around a corner, crashes into him, and the eggs crack upon the ground.  He hesitates only for a moment before kneeling and sucking the yolk out of the dirt.

Badass ending too.  B+

Stray Dog (1949).  The world's worst cop (Toshiro Mifune) loses his gun to a pickpocket, so Takashi Shimura takes him on a training day through the mean streets of Japanese City Whose Name I Didn't Catch, Probably Tokyo.  Pretty okay, I guess, but more than a little flat due to no one important dying.  Imagine the second half of High and Low, then, but with a really inept detective.  C+

Assault on Precinct 13 (1976).  Cool siege movie by my main man John Carpenter.  Great score.  Feels like it's missing a third act, but such is low-budget action filmmaking I guess.  B

John Dies at the End (2012).  The supernatural world collides with our own in this ground-level, extremely-quasi-Lovecraftian horror-comedy.  Feels like a John Carpenter movie.  At the end everything is a little too explained and patly dealt with.  Very They Live in that regard, but not as cool.  Still, bonus points for trying, and it's funny.  B+

Meeting Evil (2009).  Garbage thriller about Sam Jackson being EEEVIL, Luke Wilson meeting him, and failing to join the phylum the rest of the human race is in.  Vaguely interesting twist, but the movie is unsalvageable. D+

Moon (2009).  YEAH SAM ROCKWELL.  CLONES.  A+

Evangelion 1.11 (2010).  God in His heaven, Shenji Ikari is the worst protagonist ever dreamed by man.  And this is supposed to be the reworked version where he's less of a pussy.  Looks cool as shit, though, except in the gross, extremely creepy, FBI watchlist-level fanservice scenes.  Ugh.  D+

Speed Racer (2010).  YEAH COLORS.  SPORTSMANSHIP.  A+

Solaris (2002).  Soderbergh's deborification of the obscure (to me, because I gave up 45 minutes in) Tarkovsky classic.  Not as good as I remember, but still very good.  Fine acting.  B+

I Saw the Devil (2010).  Oh man, I need to finish watching this.  I

Kick-Ass (2010).  Second viewing.  I was shocked that I liked it when I saw it last year.  Anchored by a winning combination of solid performances, goofy charm, enjoyable ultraviolence, extremely selective psychological realism, and possibly some kind of nebulous but resonant theme of self-improvement, it's a high recommend.  A

Kick-Ass 2 (2013).  Not nearly as high a recommend, but like Wags said, it's fun.  Full review: Damn hell ass superheroes B

[Ideologue]

And Blackfish is actually showing around here tomorrow.  I couldn't have been more pleased, except what I was looking up was Wong Kar-Wai's The Grandmaster.  Least fun fact: it's not getting a wide release till August 30.