TV/Movies Megathread

[Ed Anger]

I fucking hate the Rescuers.

[Ideologue]

The first one or Down Under?

[CountDeMoney]

Antichrist (2009).  This incoherent mess of a film is also about the terrifying reality of nature, both human and otherwise, and is at its best when it is propounding its central idea that life necessarily entails far more suffering than happiness, and emphasizing its point with beyond-R ultraviolence to the generative organs of its characters.

It's at it's worst when Lars von Trier is aimlessly running around in the woods with a video camera and can't get his actors, also aimlessly running around in the woods, to stay in the fucking frame.  Half of this film is shot beautifully: the opening shower/hardcore sex/child death sequence, in black and white and overcranked, is amazing, and its glistening pearls of slowly falling water droplets clearly inspired the Slo-Mo scenes in Dredd; I also really enjoyed it when Trier used the Smudge tool or whatever to make it look like parts of the frame were warping.  The other half is hideous: approaching Paul Greengrass levels of shakiness, and violating all sorts of composition and montage rules, probably purposefully but with great ugliness.

But, yeah, this is the one movie where you can see a guy get jerked off right after he has his goober smashed so that he ejaculates blood all over his wife's shirt.  And as such I cannot say I don't recommend it at least a little bit.

C+

I don't know what your beef is with higher education;  you practice grade inflation more than Harvard professors getting daily blowjobs from 20 year old coeds who "just need this A soooo much, oh my God, my parents will kill me and I'll just die."

[Ed Anger]

The first one or Down Under?

All

[Ideologue]

The first one or Down Under?

All

  You just hate Disney cartoons.

I don't know what your beef is with higher education;  you practice grade inflation more than Harvard professors getting daily blowjobs from 20 year old coeds who "just need this A soooo much, oh my God, my parents will kill me and I'll just die."

Look, if every horror movie had someone cut off their own clitoris with a pair of scissors, in frame, it would be lower.  But they don't.  So it isn't.  Chaos reigns.

[Ed Anger]

No I don't.

[Tonitrus]

I liked the Gummy Bears.

[CountDeMoney]

I liked the Gummy Bears.

Yeah, but there weren't any Gummy clits clipped off with wire cutters, so it gets a D.

[Ed Anger]

I liked the Gummy Bears.

WHAT THE FUCK

[Razgovory]

Finally saw the last episode of the X-files.  Good lord that sucked.  Most of the episode is Mulder being tried by a military tribunal, where they sum up the last 9 years of the show.  Okay, that's a little dull, but whatever you get an excuse to have all the people on the show come on for the finale.  They even have dead characters show up, and talk to Mulder when nobody is around.  This wouldn't be so bad if they didn't include the three funny support characters that were killed off for no good reason  three episodes ago, but again whatever.  The result of this trial is that Mulder and Walter Skinner (who functions as Mulder's lawyer) spin absurd story line after absurd storyline with no concrete evidence to back it up.  I figured they were going to have some draw card, some kind of evidence that would shock the court room.  In fact, they have a kid as a witness who on a few episodes previously who had the abilities to read minds show up as a witness.  He shows up says he can reads everyone's mind and tells them that one of the judges is an alien.  But instead of you know, demonstrating he can read minds which would probably be helpful, he just leaves.  I thought of a bunch of different ways the episode could have ended that were much better then they showed.  Bleh.

And mind you they made the last episode all about one character who has not appeared on any of the other episodes that season.  They really deserved to be cancelled. 

[Neil]

I fucking hate the Rescuers.

Probably because you're a fag.

Desolation of Smaug:  A-.  Reminded me of one of those 80s adventure movies.

[Josquius]

I haven't seen the rescuers since I was a kid but back then it was one of my favourite Disney films

[Ideologue]

I liked the Gummy Bears.

Yeah, but there weren't any Gummy clits clipped off with wire cutters, so it gets a D.

You know, you'd probably be a lot happier if you just mapped the F through A+ scale onto a stars and half stars scale.

Well, maybe not.  You'd probably be even more pissed about The French Connection when you realized a B is roughly equal to 2 1/2 stars.

[CountDeMoney]

You're from Generation Fail.  I expect no less in the taste department when it comes to movies.  Harumph.

[Eddie Teach]

Antichrist (2009).
C+