There's an enormous locust in my kitchen

[Valdemar]

I saw that, but that aint pedrito

V

[Pedrito]

Why did you boil it in oil????

And where is the pic of the dead beast?

V

Some explainations on the horrible ending of the grasshopper:

I cooked fried chicken for the kids; when I finished cooking, I did not drain the oil into the sink, but put the pan beside it (never, never decision was more serendipitously right!); in the sink there was a large pan cover.
I merrily started cooking the adults' meal (fried rice with five spice chicken and chives), when the smoke coming from the wok did disturb the beast, wherever it was. It started flying again around the kitchen, and I was (again) screeching like a girl, when all of a sudden the monster ended its flight under the cover in the sink.
Taking all of my courage out, I approached the sink, took the oil pan and poured it into the sink

Suddenly there were noises a bit like the ones made by the victims of Victor, L'Eliminateur in Luc Besson's Nikita.

After some time they stopped.

The kids came to look at the corpse; then my wife threw it outside.

No pics, sorry.

L.

[Malthus]

You literally got medieval on it. 

[sbr]

You pour oil down the sink?!

[Pedrito]

You pour oil down the sink?!

IT WUZ AN EMERGENCY

L.