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Usury Quest: The Quest to Impress Mono AAR

Started by Valmy, August 12, 2016, 09:28:57 PM

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Valmy

August 12, 2016, 09:28:57 PM Last Edit: August 12, 2016, 09:34:17 PM by Valmy


Now it is time to strike FORTH and win vast hoards of loot in the dungeons of Usury Quest!

If you are not aware of my heroic quest you can see the first great adventure in the investing thread:

QuoteOk so I am asking around and I am told the most hands on low risk-ish short term investiness entertainment for my money is peer to peer lending. Like Lending Club or something which apparently has been a thing for awhile but I had never heard of it before. Is that better? I am thinking of putting in a hundred bucks a month to fool around with and posting an AAR around the first of the month here so you can all laugh at/cheer me as I goof around in the world of high stakes video games.


QuoteOk so yesterday it was time to start my grand adventure in the deep dungeons of LENDING CLUB. Oh what vile monsters will devour my soul in this abyss of usurious darkness?

Alright so here we go:



Hell yeah! Viper can tell you I always play on hard mode. Also I am only investing $100.00 so might as well.

Speaking of $100.00 I must arm myself with my noobie sword.



Now to slay the...um wait what?



Friday? Ok damn I will come back on Friday.

Ok so today I load it up all excited to get in there and start battling the noobie notes of doom but...



FUCK this game takes forever to load up.



I will tell Total Biscuit to do a very harsh review of this game.

Anyway so...I guess I will start this all next week then. At least me losing all my money immediately will not happen!

Alright so now you know what I am doing! ONWARDS!

Ok so now I have my fully armed and operational newbie $100.00.



Aha! Now which newbie note should I do battle with first? Hmmmm.

Ok so this is how this is going to work. I invest in loans at $25.00 a pop entitling me to a tiny bit of the monthly payment the borrower makes on the note. Got it?



Alright! Ok that is enough Zelda for a bit.

Let us venture into the first dungeon:



Which is what it looks like in Everquest.

But here it looks like this:



Just like Cave Rats these notes have low hit points, poor armor, and do little damage...er...I mean they have low rates, short terms, and are for low amounts.

I tell you I was tempted a bit to venture down a bit deeper and lusted for a fat 9% rate to gather in a mighty $0.75 a month. A princely sum indeed. But the dangers were too much:



TEH HORRAH! So no I will level up a bit in the newbie zone.



Ah yeah! Four percent projected profit baby!



With such high rolling stakes I am sure you are all riveted  :P

Anyway now I have to wait for these notes to be funded and then I start making the phat lewts. Tune in next month as I venture deeper into the dark dungeons of Usury Quest in search of further death and glory.

Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Ed Anger

#1
August 12, 2016, 09:41:01 PM
A hundred bucks won't impress Mono.
Stay Alive...Let the Man Drive

Valmy

#2
August 12, 2016, 09:43:18 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on August 12, 2016, 09:41:01 PM
A hundred bucks won't impress Mono.

No this is going to have to be a really long AAR for me to do that :P
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

CountDeMoney

#3
August 12, 2016, 09:59:20 PM
Meh, I'd rather save the trouble and effort, and just let these Nigerian guys I've heard about turn my money into more money.

viper37

#4
August 12, 2016, 10:08:46 PM
is that one of those automated trading software?
I don't do meditation.  I drink alcohol to relax, like normal people.

If Microsoft Excel decided to stop working overnight, the world would practically end.

Valmy

#5
August 12, 2016, 10:24:47 PM
Quote from: viper37 on August 12, 2016, 10:08:46 PM
is that one of those automated trading software?

Nah. I was going to do something like that but DGuller told me I would be broke in like 2 seconds. So instead I am doing the Peer to Peer lending thing.
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

CountDeMoney

#6
August 12, 2016, 10:30:50 PM
Quote from: Valmy on August 12, 2016, 10:24:47 PM
So instead I am doing the Peer to Peer lending thing.

Yeah, I knew some guys that would do that.  Lend you some money until payday, and peer over your shoulder at the bank window while you cashed your paycheck.

Eddie Teach

#7
August 13, 2016, 09:32:07 AM
Quote from: Ed Anger on August 12, 2016, 09:41:01 PM
A hundred bucks won't impress Mono.

Yeah that's just dinner.
To sleep, perchance to dream. But in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?

celedhring

#8
August 13, 2016, 10:54:58 AM
Can you hire goons to collect or is that a DLC?

Valmy

#9
August 13, 2016, 11:43:48 AM
Quote from: celedhring on August 13, 2016, 10:54:58 AM
Can you hire goons to collect or is that a DLC?

I think that is part of the fee Lending Club collects from you  :ph34r:
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Drakken

#10
August 13, 2016, 01:08:11 PM
Interesting.

How does it work, how do you gain profit? What if the loan isn't repaid?

Valmy

#11
August 13, 2016, 01:35:44 PM Last Edit: August 13, 2016, 01:39:19 PM by Valmy
Quote from: Drakken on August 13, 2016, 01:08:11 PM
Interesting.

How does it work,

Somebody wants some money so they apply to Lending Club for a loan. If they are approved Lending Club sends it to their investors, me and other richer people, to fund the loan. All of Lending Club's money is made via the transaction fees.

Quotehow do you gain profit?

I own a certain percentage of the loan so I get a certain percentage of the monthly payment. In the case of the 5,000.00 loan I own .5% of the monthly payment in both principal and interest. If the loan actually goes its entire 36 month term I will end up with...eh...something like an 8% total profit I think on 5.32% annual interest. But if they pay it off early then well I make less than that.

QuoteWhat if the loan isn't repaid?

Then I lose some percentage of $25.00 :weep: though Lending Club will send their collectors of DOOM after them I think.

Hence why I was so conservative in my initial loans.
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Josquius

#12
August 13, 2016, 02:12:58 PM
Money lending?
But....
What about your immortal soul ?
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██████

Valmy

#13
August 13, 2016, 03:35:23 PM
Quote from: Tyr on August 13, 2016, 02:12:58 PM
Money lending?
But....
What about your immortal soul ?

It profits a man nothing to give his soul for the whole world...but for 4% of 100 dollars, Valmy?

Still worth more than Wales :P

See that was a 'A Man for all Seasons' reference.
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

mongers

#14
August 13, 2016, 05:02:28 PM
I opened the thread expecting to read about an anime themed MMO.  :hmm: :hmm:
"We have it in our power to begin the world over again"
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