Would you punish your child for lying to you and getting into trouble?

[viper37]

Interesting discussion I heard on radio these past couple of days, based in this news:
http://www.lavalnews.ca/tags/jade-marechal

Basic info:
The girl told her parents she was sleeping at a friend's place on Sunday night.  He friend and her parent's friends confrimed this to the girl's mother.  At the last minute, she cancelled the sleepover, instead she rented an hotel room to party with some other friends.
She never came back home the following day, so the mother alerted the police and the father, abroad, posted a message on FB with her picture asking for info if anyone had seen her.

Police found her totally drugged in a motel room with 3 other girls, most likely waiting to be shipped out to another province.  We don't know much more, police are keeping this quiet for now.

If something like this happens to your child (I certainly don't wish it and hope it never happens), once the relief of finding her alive and well (physically, at least) is passed, how do you react? You let it go thinking it's a good lesson she just had?  You restrict her movements out of the house?  Remove other priviledges?  Send her to a boot camp?

I'm curious.

[mongers]

[Languish]

Depends how good their lawyer was.

[/Languish]

[Eddie Teach]

Play it by ear. Was this experience hairy enough to "scare her straight" or will further punishment be required?

[Admiral Yi]

In the movies they always hug the kid and say "I'm just glad you're OK" while crying.  That's what I'd probably do.

[Razgovory]

Damn those other provinces, shipping our girls and what not.

[DGuller]

I'd find the guy who drugged her, and tell him to proceed with shipping her out.  I wouldn't let police bail her out of a valuable life lesson. 

[Razgovory]

It's a bit amusing that some kids get stoned and it's a plot by the Anglos to steal Quebecistani women.

[Camerus]

Depends on her age.  Given that she was old enough to rent a hotel room, I am guessing she is around 16... in which case a Draconian punishment would likely be counter productive.  So I guess I would use it as an opportunity to talk about safety and perhaps values.

[Monoriu]

I think punishment is the easy way out of telling myself that "I have done something about it".  The problem is it doesn't work. 

I will first tell her that I am glad she is back.  Then I will let her know what would likely have happened to her if the police wasn't involved.  Finally, I will tell her to get back on track to her life quest to join Goldman Sachs

[Eddie Teach]

What would you do if she told you "Goldman Sachs is for pussies, I'm going to work for Merill Lynch!"

[Monoriu]

What would you do if she told you "Goldman Sachs is for pussies, I'm going to work for Merill Lynch!"

That's perfectly fine 

[Jacob]

Yeah, I can't think of any punishment that would have a level of impact that would rise to "you were severely drugged and about to be trafficked out of province against your will" in terms of impact. Conversely, if she thought it was awesome to get super high with her friends and strange men who offered to take her on the road (i.e. she thought it was all cool) then I don't really think parental punishment is going to make much of a difference in what she does next.

So yeah, my reaction would be initial relief followed by attempts to make her realize the gravity of the situation (assuming that it's accurate) and the potential repercussions if things had gone differently.

[Admiral Yi]

What would you do if she told you "Goldman Sachs is for pussies, I'm going to work for Merill Lynch!"

Merill has always been and will always be a third tier firm.

[The Brain]

In the movies they always hug the kid and say "I'm just glad you're OK" while crying.  That's what I'd probably do.

You will do this "once the relief of finding her alive and well (physically, at least) is passed"? Weirdo.

[Monoriu]

What would you do if she told you "Goldman Sachs is for pussies, I'm going to work for Merill Lynch!"

Merill has always been and will always be a third tier firm.

So what?  Everybody knows Goldman is the best, but Merill is still one of the largest investment banks in the world.  What's important is personal salary, and I think Merill still pays very well.  If my child tells me she wants to get into Merill, I'll be super happy.