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Facebook Follies of Friends and Families

Started by Syt, December 06, 2015, 01:55:02 PM

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Valmy

Quote from: CountDeMoney on April 19, 2017, 01:50:19 PM
The fuck is that supposed to mean, anyway? 
Every day I don't get my shit pushed in from anal rape THEY DO



The criminals are getting buff and then they are going to like...um...be scary I guess.
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Duque de Bragança


Malthus

Quote from: CountDeMoney on April 19, 2017, 01:50:19 PM
The fuck is that supposed to mean, anyway? 
Every day I don't get my shit pushed in from anal rape THEY DO

It is terrifying to think of how much stronger their sphincters are than yours! 
The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane—Marcus Aurelius

CountDeMoney

Quote from: Malthus on April 20, 2017, 09:12:04 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on April 19, 2017, 01:50:19 PM
The fuck is that supposed to mean, anyway? 
Every day I don't get my shit pushed in from anal rape THEY DO

It is terrifying to think of how much stronger their sphincters are than yours!

Ed can make balloon animals with his.

Ed Anger

Stay Alive...Let the Man Drive

DontSayBanana

Experience bij!

Tonitrus


Liep

Quote from: Tonitrus on April 21, 2017, 01:06:30 AM
That recent Facebook spree-killer.

How do you kill on Facebook, asking for a friend.
"Af alle latterlige Ting forekommer det mig at være det allerlatterligste at have travlt" - Kierkegaard

"JamenajmenømahrmDÆ!DÆ! Æhvnårvaæhvadlelæh! Hvor er det crazy, det her, mand!" - Uffe Elbæk

Habbaku

The medievals were only too right in taking nolo episcopari as the best reason a man could give to others for making him a bishop. Give me a king whose chief interest in life is stamps, railways, or race-horses; and who has the power to sack his Vizier (or whatever you care to call him) if he does not like the cut of his trousers.

Government is an abstract noun meaning the art and process of governing and it should be an offence to write it with a capital G or so as to refer to people.

-J. R. R. Tolkien

CountDeMoney

 :lol: Shove that one up your sister's Facebook, Syt.

Syt

I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops.
—Stephen Jay Gould

Proud owner of 42 Zoupa Points.

Syt

I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops.
—Stephen Jay Gould

Proud owner of 42 Zoupa Points.

Eddie Teach

To sleep, perchance to dream. But in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?

Syt

http://musingsofapoeticsoul.co/article/high-school-in-1970-vs-2015-this-is-so-accurate-it-hurts/?utm_source=facebook&utm_campaign=Mikael&utm_medium=ultimate80s

QuoteScenario 1: Jack goes quail hunting before school and then pulls into the school parking lot with his shotgun in his truck's gun rack.

1970 — Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack...

2015 — School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.


Scenario 2: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1970 — Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

2015 — Police called and SWAT team arrives they arrest both Johnny and Mark. They are both charged with assault and both expelled even though Johnny started it.


Scenario 3: Jeffrey will not be still in class, he disrupts other students.

1970 — Jeffrey sent to the Principal's office and given a good shouting by the Principal. He then returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2015 — Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin He becomes a zombie. He is then tested for ADD... The school gets extra money from the state because Jeffrey has a disability.


Scenario 4: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives screams at him.

1970 — Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college and becomes a successful businessman.

2015 — Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. The state psychologist is told by Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison... Billy's mom has an affair with the psychologist.


Scenario 5: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1970 — Mark shares his aspirin with the Principal out on the smoking dock..

2015 — The police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations... His car is then searched for drugs and weapons.


Scenario 6: Pedro fails high school English.

1970 — Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

2015 — Pedro's cause is taken up by the state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist... ACLU files class action lawsuit against the state school system and Pedro's English teacher... English is then banned from core curriculum... Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.


Scenario 7: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the Fourth of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up a red ant bed.

1970 — Ants die.

2015 — ATF, Homeland Security, and the FBI are all called. Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism... The FBI investigates his parents —and all siblings are removed from their home and all computers are confiscated. Johnny's dad is placed on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.


Scenario 8: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1970 — In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2015 — Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy

I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops.
—Stephen Jay Gould

Proud owner of 42 Zoupa Points.

Syt

I always love those "kids then vs. kids today" posts - well, who's setting the rules for the kids today, eh? Very often the kids from back then, no?
I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops.
—Stephen Jay Gould

Proud owner of 42 Zoupa Points.