Valmy's ADHD Dragon Age playthrough

[Valmy]

Well I know those NOW. Well except the Flemeth one. Like hell I am clicking on that spoiler 

[viper37]

Well I know those NOW. Well except the Flemeth one. Like hell I am clicking on that spoiler 

it's tempting you, click it! click it!

About this:
I find that hard to believe since there is a chance this child may not even exist if you did not do the ritual.
IIRC, if you don't do it, another Grey Warden may do it, or if not, she leaves and you never see her again and I think she managed to get pregnant somehow, somewhere, anyway.  Not too sure, I'd have to replay DA:I with variations in the keep.

[Valmy]

the post game DLC was cancelled due to negative reactions to the base game.  I figure the DLCs did not sell as expected either, despite how good they were.

The irrational nerd rage was intense with that title as I recall. Oh well. I should just be glad they made a third one.

[Valmy]

Ok wow so a lot happened. Yet not a lot happened. Dragon Age 2, at least so far, does not have a big over-arching narrative that makes for easy AARs but it does have tons and tons of fairly interesting minor quests. So I will do my best to not let this be a monstrously long entry.

Ok so Kirkwall, despite being known as the 'City of Chains' and featuring charming suffering slave art, is a fairly unpleasant place. The Viscount seems like a decent guy but seemingly every single institution in this place is rotten. Well except maybe the whore house, that seems legit. Anyway.

So just to demonstrate this Urien gets approached by a city Magistrate to capture a notorious criminal hiding out in some old ruins outside of town.



'It is standard procedure to hire notorious mercenaries in this case. Here we do things by the book. Which book I have no idea'

So we go and find the guy to discover he is a murderer who kidnaps elven children and murders them, because he thinks they are pretty and then kills them for the dark feelings that come up inside of him. He claims he is possessed by demons, but he is no mage just a fucked up person. He has fled to a demon infested ruin and begs Urien to kill him. But the fucked up part is his father is the Magistrate and he keeps letting him go and allowing him to continue his crimes. So Urien complies with his request and kills him. Then the Magistrate is furious and vows revenge.

Urien has learned a lesson: in similar situations best to just kill the guy and lie that he escaped. I guess he is now a hero to the City Elves, for all the good that does him.

But then things get really weird.

So Urien got a job through the Red Iron Mercenaries, his former...erm...indenture holders I guess, to help a dwarf merchant recover a cargo of Lyrium. But the whole thing was a hoax. The group finds the "cargo" in the alienage and then gets ambushed by a bunch of Tevinter slave traders?! It turns out they are after an escaped elf slave, a bizarre magical warrior named Fenris who is kind of the anti-Anders. Having been a slave to mages in a magical society he has little of the bizarre Rousseauian idealism that Anders has towards the mages. Rather he is more Hobbesian and fears allowing mages to be freed from Leviathan.



'So...what anime did you steal your hair from?'

So he says he is going to break into his masters estate in Hightown and murder him before he can skip town. Well that sounds legit so Urien goes along. They hack through tons of fade monsters the Tevinter Magister summoned to meet us there. Only to find that his master had already slipped out. Well he is a mage so maybe he used the flu network. And it seems because the laws of the wild west run Kirkwall if you break into somebody's house and kill them you just get to keep their house, so Fenris moves in and promises to help Urien from now on. We go from assassin to vengeful human murderer to psychotic mage-hater. I think there is a rule that as we go through each game the elves just keep getting more dangerous. Oh and Fenris has Lyrium tattoos etched into his skin that give him magical powers. This means he will be a slightly different warrior than Urien even though they are both two handed scrappers.



'Don't feel bad. Bethany has been casting spells in front of people for over a year and you are the first one to notice.'

Seriously though. It is not like we have to keep Bethany in a secret compartment in our hovel like some secret English Catholics hiding illicit priests. She literally will cast spells right in front of fanatical Templars and they will not bat an eye. Then this guy comments on it. Ok if you are going to have story/gameplay segregation at least be clear on the rules. I bet this is even more bizarre if Hawke is a mage.

In any case we have probably not seen the end of the Tevinter Magister and his attempt to recapture Fenris. Watch this space and so forth.

Next Urien meets up with Anders outside of the Chantry. This being one of his plans I think we know what to expect.



'LOLZ'

So we go in meet Karl and his has indeed, against all tradition and Chantry law, been made tranquil. And he has led the Templars here. Way to go Anders. Then the fade spirit takes control.



'Wait....this is a spirit right? Because it is not acting like a spirit'

So we, like the when Lorcan helped Anders, ended up hacking through nutty Templars. Once we win the presence of the fade spirit somehow restores the tranquil for a bit and he asks Anders to kill him and Anders complies. We get back to Anders' underground lair and he explains that he is possessed by Justice from Awakenings. And that is only the beginning. Anders insists that Justice needed a body to possess once Kristof's body decayed.



'Um no you didn't'

It was Nathaniel who offered to help Justice like this not Anders. Awakenings Anders wouldn't have helped anybody. Then Anders says he and Justice were going to team up to save children from being torn from their parents and being sent to the Circle. Arl Eamon will tell you that is a great plan. Only that didn't happen at all. Justice offered to help Anders free the mages and Anders told him to fuck off. Anders had no problem with babies being harvested by blood mages in Awakenings so where did this 'OMG thing of the children!' stuff come from? Anders and Justice were never friends or really friendly. This just makes no sense, again Awakenings came out only a year before DA2 so surely all the writing and plot for DA2 was already done. They couldn't have set this up like...at all? Anders went right from charming funny selfish jerk guy to selfless angry freedom fighter guy? Just...headdesk. At least this development insures Urien will be the only British funny guy in the party.

Which brings me to the worst part. Ok so Justice went into Anders and got corrupted by his firey rage and is now a demon on vengeance who can possess him at moments when he gets angry. Essentially I have a mage Incredible Hulk on my team now. He is likely to go crazy and blow up the city at any moment. And given how unhinged and off the reservation the Templars that is almost certain. I am almost fascinated to see the trainwreck unfold.

There is a rule in Dragon Age where Isabela must be introduced beating up people in seedy establishments.



'I may seem like an invincible force for destruction now but once I am actually in your party I will just be a normal rogue'

Isabela wants Urien's help as her second dueling some guy named Hayder outside the Chantry. I am sure we are just going to be standing there marking off their ten paces.



'Yes and it seems you got a new tailor since then. I approve.'

So we go to the Chantry at night for this gentlemanly duel and instead a large group of mercenaries swoops down to kill Isabela instead. Quel scandal! So after winning that fight they find Hayder inside the Chantry (man not even a priestess keeping a vigil or something? You can just walk into the Chantry and do whatever at night? Ah well) and he reveals Isabela released a bunch of slaves so got her ship destroyed in retribution. Also a valuable relic is lost. So her former employer is trying to kill her. I really know how to pick excellent party members. So after taking care of Hayder Isabela joins my merry crew. She needs to find a 'relic' she lost to get to him so he will stop trying to kill her. Well ok then that sounds like a lot to go on, Urien will keep his eyes open for a 'relic' of some sort. She then hires Urien to help out a friend of hers.

We do help Isabela's friend and after great danger find his missing cargo at the docks and it turns out the cargo was explosives. He insists it is all legit. Who is his employer? The Orlesian military? On the positive side it seems he sells and makes poisons which would be something nice for Isabela to use being a dual-wielding backstabbing type.

Ok then there was a case of an Orlesians missing wife. Let me just say they were not on good terms but he wants me to find her to clear his name of murder. The Templar Emeric, the guy who had captured Jowan and Arl Howe had locked up in Origins, is also looking for her and gives me a tip to talk to her elf boytoy in the brothel. This eventually leads Urien to finding a lair of abominations and demons and her remains along with her wedding ring. Obviously used for blood magic. Charming. So they take her body to Emeric for proper burial and the ring back to her husband. When he finds out she was dead he refuses the ring not wanting to be under suspicion. It was nice to see Emeric has recovered from his ordeal and is out and about again. There is also another Origins related quests. They uncovered an anti-Amaranthine conspiracy related to Amaranthine's growing power after being saved by Lorcan. Man they rebuilt faster than I thought.

Sorry I am probably not telling this very well. This part is really heavy on sub-plots. I keep being pulled in so many different directions.

So let's talk about going outside the city. Ok one of the many things Urien is into is searching for missing Templar recruits. So they do that on the way to the Dalish Elves (to return Flemeth's amulet...remember that?). They track the Templar to a road outside the city but it seems the Knight-Captain of the Templars has found him already. And it is Cullen, that young knight tortured and made unstable by Udred's attempted coup in the Circle Tower in Origins. I guess becoming mentally unfit to do your job means transfer to Kirkwall and rapid promotion. Then something impossible happens...

The Templar fugitive is an abomination and summons demons. They put them down then Cullen says what I was thinking.



'Indeed...how is that possible?'

So was this Templar recruit a mage? More on this quest later. But I guess between Emeric and Cullen Ferelden has a policy of sending all their Lyrium addicted traumatized Templars to Kirkwall. That explains so much.



'So glad this guy is in charge'

For being a militant paranoid guy Cullen didn't seem to notice Bethany casting all those spells a second ago.

So anyway on to the Dalish elves. They have gotten more...celtic than before. They now sport Welsh accents. I guess that makes some sense, it was weird they and the dwarves had the same accent. It is the exact same Dalish clan as the one from the Dalish Elf Origin in DA:O. Probably not a coincidence. The Keeper tells them to join up with Merrill, also from the Dalish Elf Origin, and take the amulet to the top of the mountain.



'She paints with all the colors of the winds'

The Elves call Flemeth Asha'bellanar. Ok so there are demons all the way up this mountain. Why is not really explained. Merrill is going to go with us after we perform the ritual. We find out why from the disdain her fellow Dalish hold for her. Though to be fair the Dalish can be a little touchy. During another quest later on they find one of the human werewolves Lorcan saved back in Origins. It seems the Dalish are tracking them all down and murdering them for the terrible crime of being cursed by their own keeper. Even questioning this rather unreasonably bloodthirsty policy was a death sentence.

But the reason the elves want to banish Merrill is probably because she is a blood mage. My group is going to have a blood mage and an abomination? It is like mage bingo. Or maybe that is not the reason. Merrill mentions that she is going to save her clan from something. So probably more backstory there.



'LOL she'll be fine. The only person who notices mages casting spells is Fenris.'

So they get to the altar on the mountain and Merrill does a ritual and BOOM Flemeth appears. She notice 'Merrill' is one of the 'people' and asks if she knows who Flemeth is. Um...so...is Flemeth connected to the elves in some way? Are the Old Gods also Elf Gods? Merrill does not know since she is Dalish and doesn't know anything. Anyway hilariously enough Urien revives Flemeth after Lorcan kills her. Funny.



'Well played Witch, well played.'

She kind of says what Morrigan said at the end of Witch Hunt. Huge changes are about to hit the world. But she says Urien is going to be the one who gets it started and he has her sympathy. Huh I guess things are going to go well for our hero. Then she turns back into her normal dragon Old God shape and flies away. They journey up to the top of the mountain and fight a bunch more demons, including a revenant. The fact that Merrill is immortal, not having officially joined the party yet, really helped. All they found was a barrier force field covering a cave. Meh.

So Merrill moves to the Alienage. She is quite the bookish nerd who is awkward among people. Just a sweet little mousey kind of Blood Mage.



'She just moved here and her house is already nicer than mine.'

In addition to this we help Aveline with the bandits and take out the assassins who murdered Sebastian's family. He is grateful and goes off to get Viscount help gaining back the throne of Starkhaven. Yeah that is not going to go anywhere. The Guard Captain is furious at Aveline for...doing her job or something. Urien and Aveline find out that it is because the Guard Captain is corrupt and is sending solitary guards laden with valuables to get ambushed by these guys. So they will have to deal with that.

Cullen told them that the missing Templar recruits were seen visiting the brothel but he was getting no where being the militant bore that he is. So Urien went and found the prostitute in question who used blood magic to control his mind and she nearly made him slit his own throat before Bethany saved him. The prostitute was turned in to the Templars and she informed him there is a cabal of Blood Mages trying to restore mage rule over the entire world hiding in the city. Which is weird because Anders said no mage would ever want to rule over anybody. So we need to track them down.

And then there are tons of other things going on. There are so many subplots and subplots to subplots it hurts my head trying to keep track of all of them. I have not even really talked about the Qunari yet, that is a thing. Eventually Urien is going to have to choose between mages and Templars it seems. Both sides are incredibly dangerous and out of control. I sure would prefer to remain neutral. These Templars just flaunt Chantry rules and are clearly driving the mages to insanity with their illegal ways. The Chantry is just sitting by and letting this happen. Abominations and blood mages are committing horrendous crime after horrendous crime.

The government of Kirkwall is thoroughly corrupt and intrigue and backstabbing are everywhere.

Basically this is a lot of fun.

They take the information provided by Abominanders and 50 Sovereigns to Varric's brother and he is delighted. He tells Urien to handle everything he needs to handle in the city before they go since they are going to be gone for weeks if not months. You might be waiting a bit dwarf, Urien has a long to-do list.

I am guessing I have recruited everybody by now:



From left to right:

Broody guy (Varric to Fenris: Friend, if your brooding were anymore impressive, women would swoon as you passed. They'd have brooding babies in your honor.). He is almost too broody to even be Elfy Nathaniel.

Absurdly sexy sexually liberated pirate woman. A force for stability on my team, which says something about the team.

Funny Dwarf.

Badass warrior who should be the hero instead of Urien

Urien, funny British guy with huge maul. Trying to survive and do the right thing in messy world. And have fun.

Bethany, sweet apostate sister.

Awkward geeky Blood Mage

Horrifying Abomination who will probably murder us all.

Hilarity is sure to ensue. For the glory of House Amell!

[Valmy]

One of the leaders of the Qunari, the Arishok to whom Sten was serving in Origins, has been shipwrecked in Kirkwall and isn't going anywhere. He and hundreds of his people have set up shop in a section of Kirkwall and nobody knows what exactly he is doing. Keep in mind this is one of three people who rule the entire Qunari nation so it must be important. Many unscrupulous people see opportunity here. The Qunari are the world leaders in explosives so one enterprising dwarf thinks that if we kill off outlaw Qunari who have abandoned the Qun, called Tal-Vashoth, maybe the Arishok will hand over valuable explosives knowledge.



'Yes the Qunari are the sort of easy going people to casually sell military technology. Oh and since when did they have horns on their heads?'

Yeah some sort of nuclear fallout in the Qunari homelands has led to some kind of mutation resulting in a dramatic change in their appearance. Of course something similar happened to elfy ears which now look even more clownish having been WOW-ified. No wonder Velanna elected to disappear into the Deep Roads.

The Tal-Vashoth are on the Wounded Coast.



'*rim-shot*'

While hunting for them they find a dead Grey Warden with some interesting documents.



'Avernus ethically blood-magics away'

They place the documents in a Grey Warden dead drop later on. Urien gets a letter from the Wardens thanking him for his efforts after that. I guess he sent a return address along with the documents.

While on the wounded coast they have that confrontation with the Dalish Elves trying to kill that former Werewolf I mentioned earlier. It is also here that they find the Viscount's son. Oh wait I never did mention that did I? Well the Viscount's son has run off with one of the Qunari and the Viscount hired a murderous group of mercenaries to rescue him. Urien decides his more subtle approach may get the job done better.



'Yes I am sure we will have a nice reasonable chat over tea'

Indeed the Winters kill the Qunari, so the Viscount's son refuses to go with them. They are about to take him by force when Urien shows up and tries to cool down everybody. Then the leader of the group recognizes him as a rival and a massive battle ensues. Man that did not go well. However the Viscount's son is grateful and they return him to the palace. The hunt for the Tal-Vashoth will have to take place another day.



'You don't understand me dad! YOU NEVER WILL!'

I bet the Viscount's son will be grounded for awhile. At least this helps gets Urien known to the powers that be. So now Urien goes after the blood mages trying to take over the world. These blood mages are capturing Templars and forcing demons into them to destroy the Templar Order. They have to use recruits because they lack the usual Templar immunities.



'These blood mages are so powerful they keep the Veil in a box'

They find the last living Templar recruit, Keran, and the blood mage leaders.



'You see Anders? You see! Oh wait didn't bring you did I...'

So we rescue Keran and bring him back to Cullen and the Templars. Urien lets him know he may be possessed. Cullen freaks out and wants to boot Keran out of the order but Urien convinces him that would be a terrible idea. Cullen can be reasoned with. To a surprising degree actually considering what he has been through.



'Almost like the mages should be partners with the Templars...damn Cullen there is some Greagoir in you yet.'

Maybe the Templars are not entirely lost to insanity. Urien files with revelation away for latter use, in his file that reads 'get Meredith removed and Cullen put in her place'. Huh maybe he should get a more ambiguous name for that file.



'Thanks I live to help my friends the Templars. Pay no attention to the apostate mage over my right shoulder.'

That is their father's staff. When you decide to put a naked woman on top of your magical staff remember your daughter may use it someday.

With the Templars and Viscount becoming aware of their good friend Urien and House Amell it is time to deal with the City Guard. Urien and Aveline save the patrolling guard from the corrupt Guard Captain's bandit friends. The guard, Donnic, is appreciative....very appreciative.



'Hey I helped to! Am I not also beautiful? Is my beard not impressively fuzzy?'

They find evidence of the Guard Captain's betrayal and bring it to the Viscount. The Guard Captain stoically marches off the prison in disgrace, a tragic figure. Hehe just kidding.



'At least you are already friends with all the criminals in Kirkwall. Should prevent that awkward 'getting to know everybody' stage when you get to prison.'

Aveline, the greatest hero in Kirkwall, is named to be his replacement. Urien finally gets a flirt line with her and takes it.



'Thanks I just admire you so much....wait 'friend'? This isn't going to happen is it?'



'No...no it is not. Donnic you smoothy.'

At least now there is one public official in Kirkwall we can count on.

Have I mentioned the runaway elf-blood yet? No? Ok so in the Alienage a former Dalish woman's human son is a mage and she was protecting him. But he was showing signs of having demons tempting him so she recommended he go the Circle. He ran off. So Ser Trask and Urien are looking for him. Ser Trask is a good man and is very worried he has been captured by slavers or killed and encourages Urien to track him down since as a Templar he will attract too much attention. Urien first goes to the mages' father, an Antivan merchant in Lowtown. He is hesitant to trust them.



'Bethany is Urien's delegate for sympathy providing'

I mean how could you not trust her? He tells Urien he referred his son to an ex-Templar named Samson. Well Samson turned him over to a guy that sold the boy into slavery. This is all very confusing since I swore only elves could be slaves, even in the Tevinter Imperium. David Gaider really needs to keep his lore straight.

Anyway rescuing mage slaves sounds like a rare something Fenris and Abominanders might both like so Urien brings them along.



'Humans, elves, Kirkwall government officials...it seems everybody is fair game to the Tevinters.'

The slaver there is named 'Danzig'. Weird. Maybe his parents never got over Danzig becoming a Free City in the Treaty of Versailles. Fenris, Urien's torture delegate, makes him tell them where the Elf-blood boy has been taken using his Lyrium powers. Then they kill all the slavers. Man how many armies of men do the Tevinters have scouring Thedas for slaves? They must be seriously short on labor these days. The slave base is also on the Wounded Coast. It is just the place to be.

Urien and company charge in and take care of the slavers. The mage, Feynriel, was trying to escape to the Dalish instead of be taken to the Circle. The Dalish do something similar with mages, they remove them from their families and put them in the care of the Keeper and the rest of the clan keeps an eye on them and makes sure they do not become abominations. But it is generally much freer and certainly much better than the illegal mismanagement going on in the Kirkwall Circle. Merrill assures him being a mage will not be his problem with the Dalish, his insufficient elfyness will. He seems to do alright though when they visit him later. Besides...



'One less potential abomination in Kirkwall? I call it a win.'

Now they finally can take care of those Tal-Vashoth.



'Once you leave the Qun you also leave your clothes behind'

Ok now I think I mentioned they were working for a mine owner whose workers were being attacked in a mine called the Bone Pit outside of town. I didn't? Well ok they are. So after the extermination of the Tal-Vashoth raiders they journey into the Bone Pit and try to find out what was happening to the workers. Well it seems the workers mined into a Dragon lair and are getting slaughtered. Obviously some OSHA regulation irregularities are occurring. Eventually they fight through the baby dragons to find Momma. Here you will see the heroic badassness of Aveline in action.



'That all you got?'

Once that is done they return to Kirkwall. The mine owner is so impressed he makes Urien part owner and Urien immediately offers the few surviving workers a generous raise to return to work. The owner tells Urien to let him handle the business stuff and Urien can handle the dragon exterminating stuff from now on. Probably wise.

The noble Ser Trask has another job for Urien. A group of Stakhaven mages have escaped and are held up...where else...but the Wounded Coast.



'The Templar with a heart of gold'

By the way the reason Ser Trask is like that is because his daughter was a mage. She was held by some of the slave traders Urien and company found during the Feynriel quest. She blew herself up as an abomination. Again it seems humans are now slaves in Tevinter. I forgot to mention that earlier there is a lot of stuff going on.

He wants Urien to go in and try to reason with the mages before the more militant Templars show up. Urien goes in and, of course, there are abominations and walking corpses everywhere. Abominanders notes that he hates it when mages do this kind of thing to escape Templars, it just further justifies how mages are treated. Too true. I hope he remembers that before he goes full abomination on Urien and kills them all. One mage has had enough and runs to Ser Trask on his own to return to the circle. They find the blood mage rebel leader inside and he and his likeminded apostates and abominations attack them. After the battle the few remaining mages thank Urien and company and ask us to help them escape. They promise to go another nation where the Templars are not as out of control. That sounds like a good plan.



'Life is just too boring for Urien'

So with the mages following at a discrete distance Urien heads out to meet the militant Templars. They are all ready to charge in and slaughter the mages, not being satisfied with the one Ser Trask has managed to capture.



'Fortunately all bullshitting has been delegated to Varric'

The Templars buy it. Urien tells them the leader of the Apostates escaped out the back of the caves and the Templars run off to investigate. The Starkhaven mages escape, hopefully to a more law abiding Circle. Urien is carefully playing on both sides still. The center must hold. Cullen and Trask seem like Templars who can be reasoned with.

With that done It is time for Urien to meet up with the dwarf merchant who wanted him to slaughter the Tal-Vashoth.  They are to meet the Arishok to tell him the Tal-Vashoth are taken care of and ask would he please turn over vital military secrets in their place. Oddly Isabela chickens out and runs off before they enter the compound. Huh. Does Isabela have an irrational fear of Qunari or...maybe a rational one? Maybe she stole somebody's sword. So instead Urien takes Fenris. This turned out to be a good move since Fenris knows Qun.



'A growing lack of disgust? Fenris is basically the Talleyrand of Qunari diplomacy'

I guess I know who will be coming along in future dealings with the Arishok. I guess it makes sense, the Tevinters and the Qunari have been at war a long time. Anyway the Arishok tells the dwarf to go fuck himself as one would expect. Still no clue what the Arishok wants in Kirkwall except he disapproves of Kirkwall a lot and the Qun is why.

The last mission Urien does also involves the Qunari and it is a bit convoluted. Urien gets hired by a Sister of the Chantry to smuggle a Qunari mage to freedom.



'See Anders and Merrill? It could be worse.'

So basically Qunari mages have their mouths sewn shut and they have to wear this giant collar that keeps then compliant and controlled. Urien and company smuggle him out and he automatically does whatever Urien tells him...freaky. Once they escape a large unit of Qunari are waiting for them. They demand Urien turn the Qunari mage, the Priestess named him Ketojan 'The Bridge between worlds', over to them and Urien refuses and they have to defeat the Qunari unit. Once they are defeated Urien uses their slave rod to free Ketojan from mind control. He thanks Urien and names him an honorable man but it seems the Qun demands he die. So he immolates himself 'Buddhist Monk in Vietnam' style. Ah the Qun.

The whole quest was a setup. The Chantry Priestess hoped Urien would be killed by the Qunari and the massacre used as anti-Qunari propaganda. Kind of a convoluted plan there Sister.

So that is it. 52 quests later and innumerable characters and plots and intrigue later they are ready to leave for the Deep Roads. This has been a tough one to recount I hope it has not been too confusing and you guys are still entertained. It certainly has been confusing for me, I actually had to take notes.

This game is actually kind of courageous the way they have the plot be a combination of greater and personal elements. There is no over-arcing world destroying threat there, just some of the elements of the game world being explored. They are really turning up the heat on the whole Mages-Templar thing in a way that is a bit over the top. But I guess what is there to prevent this kind of thing happening? I think I discussed in the DA:O part of the playthrough that the Circle system was unstable and only required unreasonable people in charge for it to fail. Well that seems to be happening, Knight-Commander Meredith is way over the line. Granted I have not talked to her yet so who knows? Whomever the First Enchanter of the this Circle is has not even been mentioned. I also look forward to seeing what Kirkwall looks like in the next time period.

Now I have made some fun of the Dalish ignorance of things Arlathan before but Merrill really takes ignorance to a whole new level. I get that she has never been to a human city before but she is acting like some Polynesian native just meeting British explorers rather than some local culture that has been in contact with humans for over 2000 years. I keep waiting for her to ask us about our boom sticks.  For example she said 'I do not understand why humans lock away their mages. It is a gift from the creators'. Ok Pocahontas, I get that you are a noble savage and everything but surely you have heard of the Tevinter Imperium? We are in a city covered with statues of elves enslaved to their magister masters. The guys who destroyed the culture you are trying to recreate? Ring any bells? Andraste, the human prophet who emancipated the elves? Never heard of her? I mean I thought this was some kind of geek elf who spent her time studying and is socially awkward. I don't know what she studied but not only does she seem not to know anything about Arlathan or human cities but she also is entirely ignorant of what we were told was common Dalish knowledge in DA:O.



'Sweetie you could carry around a sign that says 'I AM A BLOOD MAGE' and the Templars wouldn't notice.'

Now the expedition: I had planned for Urien to bring Bethany, Aveline, and Varric on the expedition if we couldn't bring everybody (I thought maybe there might be a basecamp a la Origins we could store everybody). But mother dear showed up and asked him not to take Bethany since if something happens all her children would be dead. Well that is a good point. Sweet sister will remain behind and Urien will take Abominanders instead. His Grey Warden talents might be useful. Besides no Templars to trigger his Vengeance Demon down there. Still feel bad what he has done to poor Justice



'If I do not come back please finish our work.'

Then we go back to Varric being interrogated by Cassandra ( so pretty when she is righteous)

She seems to think Urien and Bethany were anti-Chantry types dealing with Qunari, Abominanders, Merrill, Isabela, and other subversive scum. She refutes Varric's claim he was just in it for the money to restore his family fortune. She claims he had to have known what they would find down there. Woah. What are we going to find down there?

Varric says it was not so simple. She reminds him of the terrible things Urien did. Oh dear, I assure you Cassandra we meant well.



'Yes but they were all bad.'

The expedition starts on its way when a collapse of a tunnel stops them in their tracks. Dangerous side tunnels will have to be scouted to find an alternate route. Urien and company will be doing this of course. But then a real disaster occurs. Sandal is missing! Who will do our enchantments in the future?



'More likely we will find him with three dozen dead darkspawn laying around him'

Will our heroes prevail? What horrible deed is Urien going to do in the future? Find out...well you probably already played Dragon Age 2 and know but find out what I think when I find out.

What Urien Amell-Hawke did in Act 1:



They bluffed the Templars to allow the Starkhaven mages to escape.

They recovered the explosives for Isabela's friend Martin.

They killed the Magistrate's deranged son Kelder, at Kelder's request I might add.

They delivered the Viscount's son to his father and killed the mercenary captain of the Winters, Ginnis.

They killed Danzig the German Nationalist Tevinter Slave Trader.

They told the Orlesian Ghyslain about the death of his wife.

They defeated the Dragons in the Bone Pit mine.

They did not blackmail Ser Thrask about his daughter being a mage.

They did not kill the Blood Mage Idunna after Bethany broke her mind control over Urien.



They allowed Feynriel to go to the Dalish.

They rescued Keran from the Blood Mages and convinced Cullen to let him stay on.

They defended Ketojan, the Qunari mage, from the Qunari. He then burned himself to death to maximize the Qunari body count.

Karras, and the other radical Templars, were not killed. Rather they were bluffed by Varric and Urien.

[viper37]

'A dwarf with no beard? GUILTY!'

He has one.  He just wears it on his chest

The Hawke family is fleeing for their lives as Urien and little brother get there just as the horde does. I swear I do not get the timing around Lothering. How did Lorcan recover from his wounds and walk all the way up the road, do all that stuff in Lothering, and somehow leave before two guys who fled directly from the battle even get there? I have mentioned the weird things around Lothering and the timeline before that came up in DA:O. Eh probably best not to think about it.

They were in Lothering while Lorcan was there.  They fled from the battlefield to Lothering, waited and rested, then fled before the invading darkspawns.

I guess that solves the problem of he and Urien being built similarly as warriors.

Yep.  If you play a mage, Bethany gets crushed by the ogre.

Btw, about Hawke Sr being an apostate mage, there's a story in one of the DLC that will explain you why he wasn't too bothered by the Chantry

'Wait Amell? As in...Lorcan Amell?'
Mother is an Amell?
'Leandra Amell? So...my heroes are like Cousins or something?'

yes

Weird nobody ever said anything about Lorcan having any connection to Kirkwall and he never mentioned anything about having family in Lothering. Maybe they are distant relations or maybe being a circle mage Lorcan just didn't know anything about his family of apostates. Man I am now even more bummed about Cousin/Brother Carver dying so heroically. You will be avenged Carver. Oh wait you already were. And it seems the Amells are a famous noble family in Kirkwall and have an estate and everything. So that is nice.

Mages are usually taken very young into the circle and family contacts are frowned upon.  Much like the Jedi.  Since enrollment is mandatory or the alternative is to be made tranquil, the few that are found as older child/adults may retain some family contact.

Also, for a noble family, it is usually not very well seen to have a mage in the family.  And I think being a mage discredits you from being any kind of land/title owning noble.

It does seem there is a nobleman, a count I think, who supposedly rules the city but the Templar commander Meredith is the real power.

Viscount.  But he's not a nobleman, he's an elected official. 
Minor spoiler:
[spoiler]And you can only rule with support from the Templars.[/spoiler]

[viper37]

'Enchantment!'
Huh. I guess before going to the Tower of Magi in Ferelden Sandal stopped off in Kirkwall. Actually it makes no sense for them to come here but it is nice to see a familiar face...not that Urien would find them familiar.

Well, it's been a year and the Archdemon has been defeated since a while now...

By the way Bioware went a little too crazy with the promotional items...either that or Uncle Gamlen has actually been spending the family fortune equipping an army.

Originally, the items you got depended on which store you pre-ordered the game.  When Bioware stopped supporting the game they gave all bonus items for free to anyone that bought the game at any time.

I guess I will do Mark of the Assassin in Act 2 and Legacy in Act 3 since it seems more important. I will try to find some logical place in the story to do so.

I recommend doing Legacy very late in Act 3.  The reason: in this DLC, you will get a super weapon that is upgraded (and actually, there's an exploit to buff it even higher than it should, if you want it...) with you as you raise level.  However, it won't upgrade anymore once you leave the DLC, so if you do it early on, you reach the end with an underleveled weapon (in your case, a sword).

Mark of the Assassin is also very, very though, so I'd say don't do it until Act 3.  And in there, there are different items/side story/quests depending on wich companion you take.  And also, there's a nasty bug in one of those dungeons, so save often in multiple places.

Ok so there is a shop that doubles as a charity for Ferelden refugees. The Fereldens are stuck in limbo. The Blight has been defeated but they cannot return home since they have no money and make up a detested underclass in Kirkwall. Ship captains are rumored to toss any Ferelden stowaways into the sea. Ferelden needs these people so maybe King Alistair and Queen Anora should get on that at some point. The Fereldens clearly know who their savior is.

Along the way, you will notice items being sold in stores that upgrade your companion's stats. You need to buy them in the Act you see them, they don't stay there indefinately.

This was written a mere year before DA2 was released, how could they write this when they clearly must have know about this plot in DA2?  Did they intentionally write a misleading epilogue to maximize the surprise? Yes he does leave the Wardens for a few weeks but that is supposed to be years after he is hailed as hero of Vigil Keep. At one year after Ostagar we should barely be started with Awakenings. Time is clearly run by magic or something. And furthermore there cannot be two British funny guys in one party. What is this? 'Dragon Age' or 'A bit of Hawke and Anders'? Thanks a lot David Gaider.

The game assumes the other final for Anders, no matter your choices: Anders was presumed dead at the Keep but he kinda faked his death:

From the wiki:

Despite the various potential outcomes of Awakening, Anders becomes a Grey Warden, meets Justice and survives. If Anders is left to defend Vigil's Keep and it was not fully upgraded, he doesn't die but rather escapes using a badly burned body in robes as a decoy. Anders tells this to Nathaniel Howe if they meet in the Deep Roads seven years later.
The Wardens force Anders to give Ser Pounce-a-lot to a friend in Amaranthine, claiming that he made Anders too soft. Anders misses the cat and keeps mentioning it.
A former templar, Rolan, infiltrates the Grey Warden ranks to keep a close watch on Anders. After Anders allows Justice to use his body as a host, Rolan accuses him of becoming an abomination and brings the templars down on him, stating that the Wardens agreed with the decision. Anders kills Rolan, the templars, and the Wardens and flees./

[viper37]

Oh and since when did they have horns on their heads?'

Qunari is more of a philosophical movement than a racial subtrait.  But yeah, they sorta of retconned it.

'You see Anders? You see! Oh wait didn't bring you did I...'

They're pushed to extremes by Templar's brutality

'Thanks I live to help my friends the Templars. Pay no attention to the apostate mage over my right shoulder.'

Ah, Fenris is the only one mentionning it, if you bring him with you and Bethany the first time.

Now the expedition: I had planned for Urien to bring Bethany, Aveline, and Varric on the expedition if we couldn't bring everybody (I thought maybe there might be a basecamp a la Origins we could store everybody). But mother dear showed up and asked him not to take Bethany since if something happens all her children would be dead. Well that is a good point. Sweet sister will remain behind and Urien will take Abominanders instead. His Grey Warden talents might be useful. Besides no Templars to trigger his Vengeance Demon down there. Still feel bad what he has done to poor Justice

Minor spoiler about the family for your next playthrough:
[spoiler]
if you ever decide to replay it and do it differently, the sibling you bring with you in the Deep Roads will die, unless you bring Anders with you.[/spoiler]

[Valmy]

He has one.  He just wears it on his chest

Boy, you aren't kidding. Maybe he will braid it at some point.

They were in Lothering while Lorcan was there.  They fled from the battlefield to Lothering, waited and rested, then fled before the invading darkspawns.

Well then I have to question their decision making anyway the timeline for DA:O and DA2 is more confusing than the Gospels.

Yep.  If you play a mage, Bethany gets crushed by the ogre.

Well I think I got the best of that deal. Carver seemed like kind of a tool. A heroic tool whose memory we shall forever hold dear.

Btw, about Hawke Sr being an apostate mage, there's a story in one of the DLC that will explain you why he wasn't too bothered by the Chantry

How...intriguing. I guess there has to be some reason he was not a blood mage or abomination. Or maybe he was. Guess I will find out.

'Wait Amell? As in...Lorcan Amell?'
Mother is an Amell?
'Leandra Amell? So...my heroes are like Cousins or something?'

yes

Yes indeed. How fortuitous I just happened to pick the human mage origin for this playthrough. Any relatives I can play in DA:I?

Mages are usually taken very young into the circle and family contacts are frowned upon.  Much like the Jedi.  Since enrollment is mandatory or the alternative is to be made tranquil, the few that are found as older child/adults may retain some family contact.

Also, for a noble family, it is usually not very well seen to have a mage in the family.  And I think being a mage discredits you from being any kind of land/title owning noble.

Yes I am aware with the basic dynamics. Also fortunate for Lorcan he was transferred to Ferelden with that circle being so comparatively well run. And I am sure the title will pass smoothly on to Lorcan's Old God son. Either that or one of Gamlen's many children he probably had with the prostitutes in the Blooming Rose.

Viscount.  But he's not a nobleman, he's an elected official.

Elected for life. And he obviously must be a nobleman. Sort of like a Doge or the King of Ferelden.

Minor spoiler:
[spoiler]And you can only rule with support from the Templars.[/spoiler]

Nope not clicking that!

[Valmy]

'Enchantment!'
Huh. I guess before going to the Tower of Magi in Ferelden Sandal stopped off in Kirkwall. Actually it makes no sense for them to come here but it is nice to see a familiar face...not that Urien would find them familiar.

Well, it's been a year and the Archdemon has been defeated since a while now...

At one point Wynne comments it has been almost a year since Lorcan left the Circle during DA:O. I guess I just figured the adventure in DA:O took a year or so. Then there has to be enough time for Oghren and Felsi to get married and have a kid and for Oghren to bugger off. Then Awakenings happens. Then some time passes and Witch Hunt happens. During Witch Hunt is when Sandal is at the Tower of the Magi.

Eh it is alright. Once we get to Act 2 everything works out again.

Originally, the items you got depended on which store you pre-ordered the game.  When Bioware stopped supporting the game they gave all bonus items for free to anyone that bought the game at any time.

Not sure what 'no longer supporting the game' means. They sure still made money off me from it

I recommend doing Legacy very late in Act 3.  The reason: in this DLC, you will get a super weapon that is upgraded (and actually, there's an exploit to buff it even higher than it should, if you want it...) with you as you raise level.  However, it won't upgrade anymore once you leave the DLC, so if you do it early on, you reach the end with an underleveled weapon (in your case, a sword).

Sounds like a plan. I do not use exploits or mods besides bug fixes though.

Mark of the Assassin is also very, very though, so I'd say don't do it until Act 3.  And in there, there are different items/side story/quests depending on wich companion you take.  And also, there's a nasty bug in one of those dungeons, so save often in multiple places.

I always have tons of saves. DA2 keeps track for some reason and it is kind of amazing. I was well over 500 in Act 1.

Along the way, you will notice items being sold in stores that upgrade your companion's stats. You need to buy them in the Act you see them, they don't stay there indefinately.

The armor upgrades. Yes I found the few in Act 1 and then went crazy looking through every other merchant. Fun times.

The game assumes the other final for Anders, no matter your choices: Anders was presumed dead at the Keep but he kinda faked his death:

Well that is a load of crap. But I already expounded on that enough. Abominanders is at least less of a creep than regular Anders, even though he is now a total bore.

[Valmy]

Qunari is more of a philosophical movement than a racial subtrait.  But yeah, they sorta of retconned it.

Yeah they are very clear any Qunari who stops following the Qun is not a Qunari at all.

They're pushed to extremes by Templar's brutality

Bastard has an explanation for everything!

Ah, Fenris is the only one mentionning it, if you bring him with you and Bethany the first time.

Yes I mentioned that

Fenris has an eye for mages...or at least a grasp for the obvious. Yes I understand story/gameplay segregation just something I find funny.

Minor spoiler about the family for your next playthrough:

[spoiler]if you ever decide to replay it and do it differently, the sibling you bring with you in the Deep Roads will die, unless you bring Anders with you.[/spoiler]

Thanks for continuing to blank these out

[Valmy]

Ok before I tell the harrowing tale of the Deep Roads expedition (quite literally as it turned out) I have one bit of errata to clear up.

Irminric, the lyrium withdrawn guy from Arl Howe's dungeon, is NOT the same Templar as Emeric in Kirkwall. Two different guys with no connection. I know you all were terribly confused so I am glad I could sort that out for you.

Before our heroes heroically hero there are a few thoughts shared in basecamp.



'The nugs Varric, they are delicious.'

'Now don't be too hard on yourself Abominanders. You have only forced us to massacre Templars once and haven't turned into an abomination and murdered us all yet.'

'Hurrah! Jokes only my age will get.'

They venture into the Deep Roads and fight lots of Hurlocks. I guess Shrieks and Genlocks suffered disproportionately high casualties during the Blight. Then they get attacked by that other Deep Roads classic: the giant spiders.



'BY ANDRASTE'S SHAPELY THIGHS THAT IS ONE HUGE SPIDER'

So big in fact I have no idea how it even moves around. You can easily trap it and kill it from a distance because of its huge size. So then they find Sandal...surrounded by piles of Darkspawn again...and he seems to have done something unholy to an ogre.



'Not enchantment...but whatever it was we hope to never find out'

If Sandal was just left in the Deep Roads for a few years the Darkspawn problem would be permanently solved. A bit further in they find the way around the blockage guarded by a Dragon. Damn do they live down here in the Deep Roads as well? What a charming place.



'Aveline, Hammer of the Wyrms, in action'

With that the way is clear. Bertrand is informed and the expedition journeys onwards. And there was much rejoicing.

Then came the time of the bitter cold...oh wait no...then they came across an ancient Thaig. One so ancient it contained no Paragon statues and all the usual Dwarven things. Bertrand insisted it was from before the time of the first Blight.



'I guess they had red glowy stuff before the first Blight.'

Seriously what is that red stuff? They never explain it. It made it look like the place had blood vessels.

Urien and company begin exploring the old Thaig and eventually find a strange altar with a valuable idol made of pure lyrium. Like something that would probably kill you if your skin came in contact with it. Bartrand is delighted to find such a valuable item in this exotic Thaig he decides to lock them in the room where they found the idol and keep all the money for himself.



'You broke my heart Fredo'

I just do not get this plan by Bartrand. He does not know the Thaig at all. For all he knows there could be a side door out of that room five feet away and Varric could be giving him noogies and tying his beard in knots in seconds. But as it turned out this almost was a death sentence so...a good try Bertrand. Trapped in a corner of the deep roads no living being has tread in millennia, they are quickly set upon by fade monsters and...something new! A new monster in Dragon Age? Amazing. They are rock monsters called the 'profane'. Eventually they meet one possessed by a demon and he explains the profane are dwarves who have been feeding on Lyrium for millennia and have eventually become these monsters. Then it offers us some sort of deal. Will they take this deal?



'What he said'

So they fight the demon and its friends. And press onwards. Then they reach the vault where the goods of the dwarves are stored and....



'OMG it is the final boss from Mass Effect 2! Varric get me the Cain!'

Ok it is a profane of incredible ancientness and size. And this was one fuck of a hard fight. After a few hours of cussing and hear pulling I figured it out. It had some strange elements but nothing totally insane like the Harvester in DA:O. Basically once you hit this thing a bit it collapses into a ball and lets out rays of death. Your party has to run behind the pillars in the room to avoid them. Then it opens up allowing you to beat the hell out of it...but while it does so it summons lots of little profanes in. It is also very immune to fire which is too bad since a lot of our stuff is fire based. Really tough fight but I made it work and Urien got to look all badass.



'BOOM!'

Varric reveals these things are supposed to be legendary.



'Hey my cousin once met an elven one of those!'

Speaking of the Varterral...well it gets mentioned again soon. More on that later. The party opens the vault and...





'We're in the money
Come on, my honey
Let's spend it, lend it,
Send it rolling around!'

Wait until mother hears about this! It takes a week for Aveline, Varric, Anders, and Urien to make it back to Kirkwall (not sure what they ate on the way...nugs I suppose). Once they get there Urien rushes back to Uncle Gamlen's to find Cullen there taking Bethany to the Circle of Magi. NOOOOOOOOO my sweet sister



'This may be a bad time but love the new dress. Blue is really your color. Or is it white and gold? Sorry'

Cullen says that he will not be arrested for harboring an apostate because Bethany is such a good girl. Don't I know it Cullen.



'Um...we are rich now...that's good right?'

And so ends the Deep Roads expedition.

And back to the interrogation. Cassandra is sure Bethany going to the Circle is the catalyst for all that happened. Varris tells her she is wrong. I couldn't help but notice she is referring to Urien as the 'Champion'. Champion of what exactly? Did he win the Kirkwall Open? Has he been called this before? First I have noticed.



'I guess Varric regrets ever meeting Anders. I know the feeling'

Anders doing something horrible will be the most unsurprising thing ever. Anyway the Seekers thought Urien and the rest had all come to Kirkwall from Ferelden together to do whatever dirty deed had been done. Varric tells her it is not what she thinks and continues his story.

So the expedition made Varric and Urien rich. Urien spent the time buying back the old estate and working his way up the social order. Everybody knew who he was now. But puzzlingly the Qunari and the freaking Arishok (don't the Qunari need their supreme warlord lording over wars someplace?) were still there after three years doing whatever. They keep claiming they are waiting for the slowest ship in history to pick them up.

Three years later Urien is summoned by the Viscount. The Viscount is under some stress.



'You said it buddy...wait who is Orsino again?'

But I am sure whomever he is Urien knows, being the ambitious social climber he is. It seems the Arishok has asked to speak to Urien personally. The Viscount has no idea why.



'It is the beard. Get's them everytime.'

Isabela spends the period looking for her relic. The relic which is a relic of some kind which looks like a relic.  It is shocking she has not found it yet. In the interim she starts a massive bar brawl and get thrown in prison only for Aveline to pull some strings and get her released after a couple of weeks. Isabel had to promise to be a good girl from then on. We shall see.

Aveline is working like crazy trying to clean up the corrupt city guard. She is a total control freak, micromanaging everything. She spends her very rare off time making sure Urien and company are ok. The burden is wearing on her.

Varric's brother Bartrand has gone missing. He now is the leader of the Tethras merchant family. He is running it from his suite in the Hanged Man in Lowtown and keeping a low profile. The game notes he is not answering his letters from Orzammar, not sure what that is about. What happened to Bartrand? Sandal and the rest of the expedition made it back ok.

Fenris is still squatting in his mansion in Hightown and the neighbors have noticed. Avenline and company have done their best allowing him to stay there. His paranoia is starting to lessen, the slavers have not come after him, but he is still very insular and rarely sees anybody outside of his mercenary work.

Anders is becoming even more paranoid. The incident with Karl has convinced him the whole Chantry needs to be overthrown and he has been forming a revolutionary force to do that. Also the Vengeance Demon inside of him is taking over more and more. Joy.

Bethany passes the Harrowing (see? Told you there would be harrowing involved) and attains a high position in the Circle. She enjoys mentoring the apprentices and finds some Templars who are not so bad. She basically likes the Circle (She obviously resembles her cousin) but is concerned as the insane Templar Commander Meredith continues to tighten the screws.

Merrill is not adjusting at all to city life. People ignore her and she constantly gets in trouble or lost. At one time she ended up on a dog track in Darktown during a race by mistake.

And so it begins once more.

[viper37]

Well then I have to question their decision making anyway the timeline for DA:O and DA2 is more confusing than the Gospels.

Well, both share some similarities.  DA2 is Varric telling a story of how it happenned.  Some details are left or transformed for the sake of story telling

Yes indeed. How fortuitous I just happened to pick the human mage origin for this playthrough. Any relatives I can play in DA:I?

No, not really.  No matter the Inquisitor, he is not supposed to have any ties to previous characters.

[viper37]

Then some time passes and Witch Hunt happens. During Witch Hunt is when Sandal is at the Tower of the Magi.

ah, forgot about that one.

Not sure what 'no longer supporting the game' means. They sure still made money off me from it

fixing bugs, releasing new content.  That kind of minor stuff smaller studios sometimes manage to do while EA can't.

Sounds like a plan. I do not use exploits or mods besides bug fixes though.

It's ok, the same applies.

[viper37]

'Aveline, Hammer of the Wyrms, in action'
With that the way is clear. Bertrand is informed and the expedition journeys onwards. And there was much rejoicing.

Supposedly, the dragons are all but extinct.  Some luck we got there!

'I guess they had red glowy stuff before the first Blight.'

Seriously what is that red stuff? They never explain it. It made it look like the place had blood vessels.

Red lyrium.  More on this in DA:I.  Stay tuned for the next game
oh, they'll talk a bit about it in Chapter 2 & 3 too