Xmas 2014 - The Languish Way.

[CountDeMoney]

Read more on how The Elf On The Shelf is preparing the youngest generations for the realities of the perpetual surveillance state--

The Elf on the Shelf is preparing your child to live in a future police state, professor warns

For some, the Elf on the Shelf doll, with its doe-eyed gaze and cherubic face, has become a whimsical holiday tradition — one that helpfully reminds children to stay out of trouble in the lead-up to Christmas.

For others — like, say, digital technology professor Laura Pinto — the Elf on the Shelf is "a capillary form of power that normalizes the voluntary surrender of privacy, teaching young people to blindly accept panoptic surveillance and" [deep breath] "reify hegemonic power."

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/style-blog/wp/2014/12/16/the-elf-on-the-shelf-is-preparing-your-child-to-live-in-a-future-police-state-professor-says/

[garbon]

Why would I step foot in a mall?

You are such a poseur. 

And let's not support seasonal temp help in this shitty fucking economy or anything.  18,000, and the cunt can't even get presents wrapped by retirees forced to go back to work.

And destroy the environment by using extra gas?

[Caliga]

My mom keeps threatening to bring a mincemeat pie. 

I convinced her to make me a pecan pie but I have a feeling she'll bring the fucking mincemeat pie along too as a joke.

[Ideologue]

Read more on how The Elf On The Shelf is preparing the youngest generations for the realities of the perpetual surveillance state--

The Elf on the Shelf is preparing your child to live in a future police state, professor warns

For some, the Elf on the Shelf doll, with its doe-eyed gaze and cherubic face, has become a whimsical holiday tradition — one that helpfully reminds children to stay out of trouble in the lead-up to Christmas.

For others — like, say, digital technology professor Laura Pinto — the Elf on the Shelf is "a capillary form of power that normalizes the voluntary surrender of privacy, teaching young people to blindly accept panoptic surveillance and" [deep breath] "reify hegemonic power."

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/style-blog/wp/2014/12/16/the-elf-on-the-shelf-is-preparing-your-child-to-live-in-a-future-police-state-professor-says/
[/quotte]
"Capillary power." Lol. You human-hating anarchists.

[derspiess]

In my house, the Elf is more of an entertainment thing to see where he'll be every morning than an OMG HES WATCHING YOU thing (Lord knows I've tried). 

[Ideologue]

Guess I f'd up the quotes on that one. Oh well.

Should I give in to the guilt my stepmom is giving me over not coming home for Xmas Eve? Like, I literally JUST went.up there, I came back Sunday night. And I want to watch The Interview.

[Admiral Yi]

Yes.

[Ideologue]

I'm just going to be a complete asshole to my sister. I don't know what she expects. It's a,real.no-win situation, much as was never faced by Captain Kirk. I should've just said I was working, whicj is kinda actually true. It's where I am right now.

[derspiess]

My family ain't perfect, but I can't imagine not spending Christmas with them unless I'm in another country.

[Ideologue]

Well, your sister isn't a Judas cunt who makes you feel like garbage just by existing, also.

[derspiess]

Christmas is about resolving differences and seeing through the petty problems of family life.

[CountDeMoney]

For fuck's sake, Ide.  Just go, you have the rest of the year to be a schmuck to them.

[Admiral Yi]

No need to be mean. 

[Ideologue]

For fuck's sake, Ide.  Just go, you have the rest of the year to be a schmuck to them.

Yeah, but she won't notice the other 364 days of the year, and why should she?  She's the winner, I'm the loser.  And she spends every second I'm with her reminding me of it, and I'm done with it.

Life's too short.

I'll go see my parents on President's or MLK Day or something.  Do you think Jesus is better than Abe Lincoln or Dr. King?  Do you hate black people?  I mean, we all always suspected.  Now we know for sure, I guess.

P.S. obviously, I didn't go.  I did get a whiny bullshit non-apology exhortation to go upstate from my sister.  I thought she was supposed to be the one with social intelligence.

[Caliga]

Well, your sister isn't a Judas cunt who makes you feel like garbage just by existing, also.

You're hired, my good man.