Vampire teenage girl heartthrob: "I'm allergic to vaginas"

Started by Martinus, February 16, 2010, 10:11:14 AM

Previous topic - Next topic
Print
Go Down Pages 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
User actions

Viking

#30
February 16, 2010, 06:08:30 PM
Quote from: garbon on February 16, 2010, 06:00:10 PM
Quote from: The Brain on February 16, 2010, 01:19:41 PM
Many people are allergic to things they really like. Not exactly strange.

I'm allergic to dogs. :(

I'm sorry, you can't have the full experience of being human then. Can you take antihistamines or something?
First Maxim - "There are only two amounts, too few and enough."
First Corollary - "You cannot have too many soldiers, only too few supplies."
Second Maxim - "Be willing to exchange a bad idea for a good one."
Second Corollary - "You can only be wrong or agree with me."

A terrorist which starts a slaughter quoting Locke, Burke and Mill has completely missed the point.
The fact remains that the only person or group to applaud the Norway massacre are random Islamists.

sbr

#31
February 16, 2010, 06:16:33 PM
My oldest ended up having to be a C-section; I was up by mom's head with a short little sheet blocking our view of the surgery.  After a bit the doctor says "Hey Dad look", assuming he was finished I looked over the sheet.  He had one hand under the chin and the other on the back of her head and was pulling her out of mom's stomach like something from a terrible horror movie.    :x

I let the doc know I was not pleased at all.

Darth Wagtaros

#32
February 16, 2010, 06:19:06 PM
Quote from: sbr on February 16, 2010, 06:16:33 PM
My oldest ended up having to be a C-section; I was up by mom's head with a short little sheet blocking our view of the surgery.  After a bit the doctor says "Hey Dad look", assuming he was finished I looked over the sheet.  He had one hand under the chin and the other on the back of her head and was pulling her out of mom's stomach like something from a terrible horror movie.    :x

I let the doc know I was not pleased at all.
He probably thought you'd find the sight arousing. 
PDH!

garbon

#33
February 16, 2010, 06:21:44 PM
Quote from: Viking on February 16, 2010, 06:08:30 PM
I'm sorry, you can't have the full experience of being human then. Can you take antihistamines or something?

My family had a dog when I was growing up. She was great.
"I've never been quite sure what the point of a eunuch is, if truth be told. It seems to me they're only men with the useful bits cut off."
I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim.

sbr

#34
February 16, 2010, 06:24:17 PM
Quote from: Darth Wagtaros on February 16, 2010, 06:19:06 PM
Quote from: sbr on February 16, 2010, 06:16:33 PM
My oldest ended up having to be a C-section; I was up by mom's head with a short little sheet blocking our view of the surgery.  After a bit the doctor says "Hey Dad look", assuming he was finished I looked over the sheet.  He had one hand under the chin and the other on the back of her head and was pulling her out of mom's stomach like something from a terrible horror movie.    :x

I let the doc know I was not pleased at all.
He probably thought you'd find the sight arousing.

He was: mistaken.

Darth Wagtaros

#35
February 16, 2010, 06:35:02 PM
Quote from: sbr on February 16, 2010, 06:24:17 PM
Quote from: Darth Wagtaros on February 16, 2010, 06:19:06 PM
Quote from: sbr on February 16, 2010, 06:16:33 PM
My oldest ended up having to be a C-section; I was up by mom's head with a short little sheet blocking our view of the surgery.  After a bit the doctor says "Hey Dad look", assuming he was finished I looked over the sheet.  He had one hand under the chin and the other on the back of her head and was pulling her out of mom's stomach like something from a terrible horror movie.    :x

I let the doc know I was not pleased at all.
He probably thought you'd find the sight arousing.

He was: mistaken.
Or you are: repressing. 
PDH!

Jaron

#36
February 16, 2010, 09:17:46 PM
Lets vote. Has Tyr actually ever seen a vagina? (excluding his birth)
Winner of THE grumbler point.

Eddie Teach

#37
February 16, 2010, 09:51:50 PM
Are you sure he wasn't created in a lab? :unsure:
To sleep, perchance to dream. But in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?

Martinus

#38
February 17, 2010, 03:22:05 AM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on February 16, 2010, 09:51:50 PM
Are you sure he wasn't created in a lab? :unsure:

Nah. No scientist would fuck up so badly.

Octavian

#39
February 17, 2010, 04:21:47 AM
Quote from: Barrister on February 16, 2010, 04:55:25 PM
My wife and I agreed that I'm going to be up near her head the entire time...

I have the same plan.

I fear however I will end up derspiessing when the time comes.
If you let someone handcuff you, and put a rope around your neck, don't act all surprised if they hang you!

- Eyal Yanilov.

Forget about winning and losing; forget about pride and pain. Let your opponent graze your skin and you smash into his flesh; let him smash into your flesh and you fracture his bones; let him fracture your bones and you take his life. Do not be concerned with escaping safely - lay your life before him.

- Bruce Lee

Queequeg

#40
February 17, 2010, 04:25:08 AM
Quote from: grumbler on February 16, 2010, 05:41:34 PM
Quote from: Queequeg on February 16, 2010, 04:51:59 PM
Slightly related, and very funny.
Hadn't heard of Rifftrax (aka MST3K for the internet) but it is a great concept.
If you listen closely, you'll notice that it is actually the same guys as MST3K.
Quote from: PDH on April 25, 2009, 05:58:55 PM
"Dysthymia?  Did they get some student from the University of Chicago with a hard-on for ancient Bactrian cities to name this?  I feel cheated."

The Larch

#41
February 17, 2010, 04:27:28 AM
I went to a life sciences museum in a school trip when I was a kid, and they had a video of a birth there. Scared the shit out of me.

Later I found there was a Facebook group for people that were traumatized by the same video.  :lol:

Razgovory

#42
February 17, 2010, 04:28:48 AM
Quote from: Queequeg on February 17, 2010, 04:25:08 AM
Quote from: grumbler on February 16, 2010, 05:41:34 PM
Quote from: Queequeg on February 16, 2010, 04:51:59 PM
Slightly related, and very funny.
Hadn't heard of Rifftrax (aka MST3K for the internet) but it is a great concept.
If you listen closely, you'll notice that it is actually the same guys as MST3K.

Also if you look at their website you'll notice it's the same guys as MST3K
I've given it serious thought. I must scorn the ways of my family, and seek a Japanese woman to yield me my progeny. He shall live in the lands of the east, and be well tutored in his sacred trust to weave the best traditions of Japan and the Sacred South together, until such time as he (or, indeed his house, which will periodically require infusion of both Southern and Japanese bloodlines of note) can deliver to the South it's independence, either in this world or in space.  -Lettow April of 2011

Raz is right. -MadImmortalMan March of 2017

Malthus

#43
February 17, 2010, 08:45:22 AM
Quote from: sbr on February 16, 2010, 06:16:33 PM
My oldest ended up having to be a C-section; I was up by mom's head with a short little sheet blocking our view of the surgery.  After a bit the doctor says "Hey Dad look", assuming he was finished I looked over the sheet.  He had one hand under the chin and the other on the back of her head and was pulling her out of mom's stomach like something from a terrible horror movie.    :x

I let the doc know I was not pleased at all.

Carl was a C-section. I didn't look, I stayed at the head end behind the sheet.

They asked if I wanted to cut the cord myself. I answered that I was happy to let the surgeon do his job.  ;) [Meanwhile thinking, "why cut? Animals in the wild would bite through that"]

What is up with that cord-cutting thing anyway? I can think of better bonding experiences. Hell, pretty well anything else would be a better bonding experience. 
The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane—Marcus Aurelius

DisturbedPervert

#44
February 17, 2010, 08:47:28 AM
Doesn't anyone chill in a waiting room smoking stogies and drinking bourbon anymore?
Print
Go Up Pages 1 2 3 4 5 6 7
User actions