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General Category => Off the Record => Topic started by: mongers on April 21, 2009, 09:28:46 AM

Title: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: mongers on April 21, 2009, 09:28:46 AM
http://russiatoday.ru/Top_News/2009-04-14/Hairdresser_turns_robber_into_sex-slave.html?fullstory (http://russiatoday.ru/Top_News/2009-04-14/Hairdresser_turns_robber_into_sex-slave.html?fullstory)

QuoteHairdresser turns robber into sex-slave

14 April, 2009, 14:05

A hairdresser from the small Russian town of Meshchovsk has subdued a man who tried to rob her shop, and then raped him for three days in the utility room, Life.ru reports.

The incident occurred on Saturday, March 14. The working day was coming to an end at a small hairdressers, when a man armed with a gun rushed in and demanded the day’s earnings.

The frightened employees and customers agreed to fulfill his demand, but when the shop’s owner, 28-year-old Olga, was handing the money to the robber, she suddenly knocked him down on the floor and then tied him up with a hairdryer cord. The 32-year-old Viktor couldn’t have known that the woman was a yellow belt in karate.

Olga locked the unlucky robber in the utility room and told her colleagues that she was going to call the police – but didn’t do so. When everybody left home, she approached the man and ordered him to ‘take of his underpants’ threatening to hand him over to the police if he refuses to cooperate.

After that Olga raped her hostage for three long days. She chained Viktor to the radiator with pink furry handcuffs and fed him Viagra.

She eventually let the man go on Monday, March 16, saying: “Get out of my sight!”

Viktor went straight to hospital as his genitals were injured, and then to the police.

Olga was resentful when she was taken by the police.

“What a bastard,” the woman said about Viktor. “Yes, we had sex a couple of times. But I’ve bought him new jeans, gave him food and even gave him 1.000 roubles (around $ 30) when he left.”

After that she wrote a notice to the police claiming the man tried to rob her shop.

Both Olga and Viktor may now face prison terms. The woman could be convicted of rape, while the man of robbery.

(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Frussiatoday.ru%2Fs%2Fobj%2F2009-04-14%2Frapper.858.jpg&hash=517c38dc14cb058b727c5517f77b4ff623244d22)

Olga (image from http://life.ru)
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Weatherman on April 21, 2009, 09:30:18 AM
:perv:
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:30:58 AM
Damn how about that.   A woman can rape a man after all.  I never considered the viagra angle.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: DisturbedPervert on April 21, 2009, 09:32:26 AM
Normally you have to pay for the treatment he got, and this guy got cash, food, and clothes.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:34:02 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on April 21, 2009, 09:32:26 AM
Normally you have to pay for the treatment he got, and this guy got cash, food, and clothes.

Well he did suffer genital damage...I don't know about you but that sounds pretty unpleasant.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 09:36:43 AM
Now this is a Languish story if I've ever seen one.  :lol:
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: DisturbedPervert on April 21, 2009, 09:37:25 AM
He had a 28 year old chick riding his cock for three days, a bit of soreness is normal.  He's gonna have another orifice that's gonna be hurting a lot more because he was dumb enough to go to the cops.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 09:37:40 AM
Quote from: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:34:02 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on April 21, 2009, 09:32:26 AM
Normally you have to pay for the treatment he got, and this guy got cash, food, and clothes.

Well he did suffer genital damage...I don't know about you but that sounds pretty unpleasant.
Ok, so you are only two days after marriage and already you are posting here how unpleasant it is to have multiple sexual intercourses with a 28 y.o. blonde Russian chick...

Damn, grallon was right. :(
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:38:38 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on April 21, 2009, 09:37:25 AM
He had a 28 year old chick riding his cock for three days, a bit of soreness is normal.  He's gonna have another orifice that's gonna be hurting a lot more because he was dumb enough to go to the cops.

True that.  I hope he enjoys Russian Prison.

But maybe he is a gay criminal and hated having the chick ride him and is looking forward to the jail part.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Caliga on April 21, 2009, 09:39:29 AM
 :blink:
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:39:49 AM
Quote from: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 09:37:40 AM
Ok, so you are only two days after marriage and already you are posting here how unpleasant it is to have multiple sexual intercourses with a 28 y.o. blonde Russian chick...

Damn, grallon was right. :(

I have never been raped and have no idea if it would be pleasant or not.  I prefer to avoid having sex with Russians in any case.  Dirty buggers.

In fact I had no idea somebody could rape me that way...that I could just go limp if I wanted.  Ah the wonders of ED drugs.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Ed Anger on April 21, 2009, 09:41:05 AM
I'm turned on.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Eochaid on April 21, 2009, 09:55:28 AM
Quote from: mongers on April 21, 2009, 09:28:46 AMThe 32-year-old Viktor couldn't have known that the woman was a yellow belt in karate.

  :lmfao: Being KOed by a YELLOW belt?  :lmfao:

Kevin
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Josquius on April 21, 2009, 10:06:12 AM
Quote from: Eochaid on April 21, 2009, 09:55:28 AM
Quote from: mongers on April 21, 2009, 09:28:46 AMThe 32-year-old Viktor couldn't have known that the woman was a yellow belt in karate.

  :lmfao: Being KOed by a YELLOW belt?  :lmfao:

Kevin
Noticed that one too. :lol:
Karate too...Belts in karate tend to be given out on a basis of how many lessons you've attended.

Awesome story though. Sounds like the plot to a porno.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: garbon on April 21, 2009, 10:18:50 AM
Viktor, eh?
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Neil on April 21, 2009, 10:22:07 AM
I always assumed that CdM's soulmate in Russia was Martinus.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Eochaid on April 21, 2009, 10:22:37 AM
Quote from: garbon on April 21, 2009, 10:18:50 AM
Viktor, eh?

Apparently has a hard time getting on with his life after being dumped :D

Kevin
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: DisturbedPervert on April 21, 2009, 10:39:13 AM
Quote from: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:38:38 AM
But maybe he is a gay criminal and hated having the chick ride him and is looking forward to the jail part.

Maybe.  But if not, on the list of possible disasters that can occur for your average criminal during an armed robbery, being tied and fucked for days by a hot young blonde is the best it's gonna get.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 01:57:11 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 21, 2009, 09:41:05 AM
I'm turned on.
TMI  :x
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Ed Anger on April 21, 2009, 01:59:09 PM
Quote from: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 01:57:11 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 21, 2009, 09:41:05 AM
I'm turned on.
TMI  :x

(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg390.imageshack.us%2Fimg390%2F4343%2Foliphant3.jpg&hash=dca9e3bc2826e5ce82808a4228e91fef11ef844a)
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 02:00:08 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 21, 2009, 01:59:09 PM
Quote from: Martinus on April 21, 2009, 01:57:11 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 21, 2009, 09:41:05 AM
I'm turned on.
TMI  :x

(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg390.imageshack.us%2Fimg390%2F4343%2Foliphant3.jpg&hash=dca9e3bc2826e5ce82808a4228e91fef11ef844a)
Racist.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Admiral Yi on April 21, 2009, 02:37:25 PM
Quote from: Tyr on April 21, 2009, 10:06:12 AM
Noticed that one too. :lol:
Karate too...Belts in karate tend to be given out on a basis of how many lessons you've attended.
That sounds more descriptive of Taekwondo.  I thought Karate was pretty stingy with belts.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: DGuller on April 21, 2009, 02:38:31 PM
Quote from: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 09:39:49 AM
In fact I had no idea somebody could rape me that way...that I could just go limp if I wanted.
Can you really?
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: The Brain on April 21, 2009, 02:47:19 PM
He thinks of alt-hist.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Caliga on April 21, 2009, 03:13:32 PM
Quote from: DGuller on April 21, 2009, 02:38:31 PMCan you really?

That's a good question.  I enjoy being blown so much that I'm not sure I could fail to enjoy it once it began, even if the person doing it was doing it "against my will".  :blush:
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 03:17:34 PM
Quote from: DGuller on April 21, 2009, 02:38:31 PM
Can you really?

I don't perform well under stress.

QuoteHe thinks of alt-hist.

I close my eyes and think of Tim's alt-hist map of England.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: lustindarkness on April 21, 2009, 03:29:23 PM
HOTT
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Caliga on April 21, 2009, 05:31:12 PM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.

:lol: WIN.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: CountDeMoney on April 21, 2009, 05:37:32 PM
I wanna check out Russia.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: fhdz on April 21, 2009, 05:45:41 PM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.

:lmfao:
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: jimmy olsen on April 21, 2009, 06:46:31 PM
Quote from: Valmy on April 21, 2009, 03:17:34 PM
Quote from: DGuller on April 21, 2009, 02:38:31 PM
Can you really?

I don't perform well under stress.

QuoteHe thinks of alt-hist.


I close my eyes and think of Tim's alt-hist map of England.
What do you have against the British Empire?
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Josquius on April 22, 2009, 07:23:23 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on April 21, 2009, 02:37:25 PM
Quote from: Tyr on April 21, 2009, 10:06:12 AM
Noticed that one too. :lol:
Karate too...Belts in karate tend to be given out on a basis of how many lessons you've attended.
That sounds more descriptive of Taekwondo.  I thought Karate was pretty stingy with belts.
Nah, when I was younger I did karate. It really was a case of how many classes you'd attended. Yellow was 10 hours or something.
You got 12 year old kids who'd been doing it since they were 4 who were counted as black belts.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Iormlund on April 22, 2009, 07:27:16 AM
Huh, when I did karate you had to take an examination under an independent panel to get brown belt and beyond.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Razgovory on April 22, 2009, 07:30:04 AM
Huh.  How do you like that.  Maybe I should become a robber.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Valmy on April 22, 2009, 07:59:04 AM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.

Awesome :lmfao:
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Queequeg on April 22, 2009, 11:45:34 AM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.
This was the most obvious and best Russian Reversal joke ever. 
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: grumbler on April 22, 2009, 12:25:11 PM
Quote from: Queequeg on April 22, 2009, 11:45:34 AM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.
This was the most obvious and best Russian Reversal joke ever.
True.  I was surprised to get to the end of the thread without seeing it.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: jimmy olsen on April 22, 2009, 12:31:37 PM
Quote from: Tyr on April 22, 2009, 07:23:23 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on April 21, 2009, 02:37:25 PM
Quote from: Tyr on April 21, 2009, 10:06:12 AM
Noticed that one too. :lol:
Karate too...Belts in karate tend to be given out on a basis of how many lessons you've attended.
That sounds more descriptive of Taekwondo.  I thought Karate was pretty stingy with belts.
Nah, when I was younger I did karate. It really was a case of how many classes you'd attended. Yellow was 10 hours or something.
You got 12 year old kids who'd been doing it since they were 4 who were counted as black belts.

It all depends on the dojo and how traditional vs. business oriented they are.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Siege on April 22, 2009, 10:25:06 PM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.

:lol:

Where do these soviet reversal jokes come from?
Is it a movie?


Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Legbiter on April 22, 2009, 10:28:14 PM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.

:lol:

grumbler wins the thread.
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: frunk on April 22, 2009, 10:29:22 PM
Quote from: Siege on April 22, 2009, 10:25:06 PM
Quote from: grumbler on April 21, 2009, 05:28:43 PM
In Soviet Russia, woman rapes you.

:lol:

Where do these soviet reversal jokes come from?
Is it a movie?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yakov_Smirnoff#Russian_reversal_.28.E2.80.9CIn_Soviet_Russia_article_reads_you.E2.80.9C.29 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yakov_Smirnoff#Russian_reversal_.28.E2.80.9CIn_Soviet_Russia_article_reads_you.E2.80.9C.29)
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Siege on April 22, 2009, 10:35:40 PM
Quote from: Eochaid on April 21, 2009, 09:55:28 AM
Quote from: mongers on April 21, 2009, 09:28:46 AMThe 32-year-old Viktor couldn't have known that the woman was a yellow belt in karate.

  :lmfao: Being KOed by a YELLOW belt?  :lmfao:

Kevin


Yellow belt is the second belt, right?

In Israel it was White belt for Kyu 9-7, Lilac (I think is the english name) for Kyu 6 and 5, Green for 4 and 3, Maroon for 2 and 1, and then Black Belt for Dan 1 and above.

On other hand, some chicks can beat the shit out of you, and they might even have yellow hair, as this video proves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vC9eoy_xK3s&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vC9eoy_xK3s&feature=related)
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: Martinus on April 23, 2009, 12:17:35 AM
Quote from: Neil on April 21, 2009, 10:22:07 AM
I always assumed that CdM's soulmate in Russia was Martinus.
:D
Title: Re: CdM has a Soulmate in Russia.
Post by: DisturbedPervert on April 23, 2009, 04:52:51 AM
Quote from: Siege on April 22, 2009, 10:35:40 PM
On other hand, some chicks can beat the shit out of you, and they might even have yellow hair, as this video proves: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vC9eoy_xK3s&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vC9eoy_xK3s&feature=related)

:lol:

Most pathetic lizard ever.