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General Category => Off the Record => Topic started by: jimmy olsen on February 28, 2010, 11:29:31 AM

Title: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: jimmy olsen on February 28, 2010, 11:29:31 AM
Or you know, we could just plant rhye or barley or corn or some other grain instead. Seriously, way too hysterical.

http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2010/02/start-hoarding-wonder-bread.html
QuoteStart Hoarding Wonder Bread

27 Feb 2010 10:52 am

by Graeme Wood

The world's wheat is defenseless against a new fungus that causes stem rot.  Brendan Koerner says a billion people could die:

    The pathogen has already been detected in Iran and may now be headed for South Asia's most important breadbasket, the Punjab, which nourishes hundreds of millions of Indians and Pakistanis. What's more, Ug99 could easily make the transoceanic leap to the United States. All it would take is for a single spore, barely bigger than a red blood cell, to latch onto the shirt of an oblivious traveler. The toll from that would be ruinous; the US Department of Agriculture estimates that more than 40 million acres of wheat would be at serious risk if Ug99 came to these shores, where the grain is the third most valuable crop, trailing only corn and soybeans. The economic loss might easily exceed $10 billion; a simple loaf of bread could become a luxury.

The fungus, called Ug99 (sounds a bit like Ice 9, and acts a bit like it too), is a new strain of the same stuff that the late Norman Borlaug won the Nobel for defeating, and thereby possibly saving more lives than anyone has ever lived.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: CountDeMoney on February 28, 2010, 11:30:47 AM
A billion people could die and at least another billion will lose weight from staying away from so many carbs.  I say it's a win-win.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: DisturbedPervert on February 28, 2010, 11:37:36 AM
Wonder Bread contains wheat?
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Cecil on February 28, 2010, 11:46:08 AM
Correction. A billion third worlders could die. Around here it would be "Huh price of bread has gone up a lot lately" and then we wouldnt care overly much.  :P
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: MadImmortalMan on February 28, 2010, 03:07:45 PM
Maybe it's time to get in the commodity futures market.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: garbon on February 28, 2010, 05:29:14 PM
Roman Meal lasts forever.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Darth Wagtaros on February 28, 2010, 10:15:01 PM
I will have to start making soy bread. 
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Viking on March 01, 2010, 04:12:59 AM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on February 28, 2010, 11:37:36 AM
Wonder Bread contains wheat?

Wonder Bread contains bread?
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Admiral Yi on March 01, 2010, 04:34:05 AM
Quote from: Viking on March 01, 2010, 04:12:59 AM
Wonder Bread contains bread?
You thought it was 100% wonder?
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Darth Wagtaros on March 01, 2010, 07:18:31 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 01, 2010, 04:34:05 AM
Quote from: Viking on March 01, 2010, 04:12:59 AM
Wonder Bread contains bread?
You thought it was 100% wonder?
I wonder what's inside?
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Grey Fox on March 01, 2010, 07:32:11 AM
Or maybe you should stop growing so many corn.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Viking on March 01, 2010, 07:53:19 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on March 01, 2010, 04:34:05 AM
Quote from: Viking on March 01, 2010, 04:12:59 AM
Wonder Bread contains bread?
You thought it was 100% wonder?

Cardboard :contract:
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Jaron on March 01, 2010, 09:38:04 AM
Quote from: Grey Fox on March 01, 2010, 07:32:11 AM
Or maybe you should stop growing so many corn.

Why?
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Strix on March 01, 2010, 02:55:17 PM
I heard something similar about rice last year.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: crazy canuck on March 01, 2010, 04:07:58 PM
I like Rye bread. 
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: frunk on March 01, 2010, 04:16:24 PM
I keep reading this as Stevie Wonder's bread is making the world's wheat rot.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 04:37:59 PM
When we first came to US, our relatives who have already been living here warned us that American bread is different from what we were used to.  It was utterly tasteless, over-processed crap, unsuitable for consumption all by itself.  It turns out they were understating the difference.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Razgovory on March 01, 2010, 05:25:52 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 04:37:59 PM
When we first came to US, our relatives who have already been living here warned us that American bread is different from what we were used to.  It was utterly tasteless, over-processed crap, unsuitable for consumption all by itself.  It turns out they were understating the difference.

What is Russian bread like?
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 05:34:14 PM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 01, 2010, 05:25:52 PM
What is Russian bread like?
Fresh, for one.  It's baked on the same day it is sold, or pretty close.  There were even special stores that only sold bread products.  It was also not packed in air-tight plastic packages, so it had a very crunchy and delicious crust.

Those are my memories from 15 years ago.  I'm not sure what bread is like now, there are pretty strong economic incentives to just sell the pre-packaged carton in supermarkets, I'm sure.  Then again, I doubt that Russians would tolerate stale bread any more than they would tolerate lack of vodka, so I dunno.

However, Americans can get pretty close to tasting the real bread.  In New York City area, you can order freshly baked and frozen whole-wheat bread on FreshDirect, and keep it frozen.  Once you warm it up in a toaster, just enough to make it warm, but not enough to actually toast it, it tastes very much like a genuine Russian bread.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: CountDeMoney on March 01, 2010, 05:36:43 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 05:34:14 PM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 01, 2010, 05:25:52 PM
What is Russian bread like?
Fresh, for one.  It's baked on the same day it is sold, or pretty close.  There were even special stores that only sold bread products.  It was also not packed in air-tight plastic packages, so it had a very crunchy and delicious crust.

Luckily for us, unlike Eastern Europeans and Russians, we don't have to raise or produce our own food on a daily basis.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: DisturbedPervert on March 01, 2010, 05:37:52 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 05:34:14 PMThere were even special stores that only sold bread products. 

We call those bakeries
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 05:56:07 PM
Quote from: DisturbedPervert on March 01, 2010, 05:37:52 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 05:34:14 PMThere were even special stores that only sold bread products. 

We call those bakeries
Not the same thing.  The Russian bread stores contained mainly simple bread.  It was pretty much like a bread section in the supermarket.  American bakeries specialize more in stuff like pastries.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Cecil on March 01, 2010, 05:57:16 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 04:37:59 PM
When we first came to US, our relatives who have already been living here warned us that American bread is different from what we were used to.  It was utterly tasteless, over-processed crap, unsuitable for consumption all by itself.  It turns out they were understating the difference.

The thing that struck me when I went over there for vacation was how sweet all the baked products tasted. Much sweeter than I´m used to. Didnt fancy it at all.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: Malthus on March 01, 2010, 05:58:31 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 05:34:14 PM
Quote from: Razgovory on March 01, 2010, 05:25:52 PM
What is Russian bread like?
Fresh, for one.  It's baked on the same day it is sold, or pretty close.  There were even special stores that only sold bread products.  It was also not packed in air-tight plastic packages, so it had a very crunchy and delicious crust.

Those are my memories from 15 years ago.  I'm not sure what bread is like now, there are pretty strong economic incentives to just sell the pre-packaged carton in supermarkets, I'm sure.  Then again, I doubt that Russians would tolerate stale bread any more than they would tolerate lack of vodka, so I dunno.

However, Americans can get pretty close to tasting the real bread.  In New York City area, you can order freshly baked and frozen whole-wheat bread on FreshDirect, and keep it frozen.  Once you warm it up in a toaster, just enough to make it warm, but not enough to actually toast it, it tastes very much like a genuine Russian bread.

At least in the larger cities in Canada, fresh baked is pretty common.

I never buy my bread in a supermarket - there is a bakery at the end of my street. I'm pretty sure they make real bread.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: MadImmortalMan on March 01, 2010, 06:04:14 PM
Quote from: Cecil on March 01, 2010, 05:57:16 PM
Quote from: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 04:37:59 PM
When we first came to US, our relatives who have already been living here warned us that American bread is different from what we were used to.  It was utterly tasteless, over-processed crap, unsuitable for consumption all by itself.  It turns out they were understating the difference.

The thing that struck me when I went over there for vacation was how sweet all the baked products tasted. Much sweeter than I´m used to. Didnt fancy it at all.

I agree. Especially the mass-produced bread like Wonder. It's like a fluffy air-filled sugar bread. You buy a big loaf that's a foot long, but if you squeeze it together into a ball it's the size of your fist. Luckily, all grocery stores have lots of real breads to choose from as well now.
Title: Re: Start Hoarding Wonder Bread, Wheat Rot to Cause World Famine
Post by: DGuller on March 01, 2010, 06:06:14 PM
This times six or so is what the inside of a typical Russian bread store looks like, or at least how I remember it.

(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ftheeatenpath.com%2Fwordpress%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2010%2F01%2Fcinderella_bakery_cafe_black_bread_rack.jpg&hash=432a895b72359fc54d7a066e6734a267c3b57f56)