http://www.theonion.com/content/index (http://www.theonion.com/content/index)
Believe it or not, it has happened. Not even our beloved humour websites are inmune to the crisis.
Here's a statement of the publisher:
http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/well_ive_sold_the_paper_to (http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/well_ive_sold_the_paper_to)
Here's a selection of their new batch of pro-China articles:
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/american_consumer_masses_agree_it?utm_source=a-section (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/american_consumer_masses_agree_it?utm_source=a-section)
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/china_strong?utm_source=a-section (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/china_strong?utm_source=a-section)
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nothing_at_all_happens_to_28?utm_source=a-section (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nothing_at_all_happens_to_28?utm_source=a-section)
http://www.theonion.com/content/news/yao_ming?utm_source=a-section (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/yao_ming?utm_source=a-section)
http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/american_children_like_me_are?utm_source=a-section (http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/american_children_like_me_are?utm_source=a-section)
You should also check their new sponsors:
http://www.yuwanmei.com/ (http://www.yuwanmei.com/)
Read and weep.
:lol:
I wonder what Yu Wan Mei actually means (if anything...)
And what brought this on? Have the Chinese bought a real paper too?
Watched yesterday the "Today Now" video about the productive wife gone missing :lol:
:lol:
In my head all the articles are read by the strident chinese news reader from People's General. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxC4BGqPVuQ&feature=related
Quote from: The Larch on July 21, 2009, 06:44:19 AM
Here's a statement of the publisher:
http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/well_ive_sold_the_paper_to (http://www.theonion.com/content/columnists/well_ive_sold_the_paper_to)
QuoteAfter subjecting me to a good 20 minutes of infernal bowing and other assorted chinky-dinkery
:lmfao:
pretty good. I wonder if the Chinese "get it?"
Quote from: saskganesh on July 21, 2009, 12:08:02 PM
pretty good. I wonder if the Chinese "get it?"
Highly doubt it. If they thought an obviously fake article was real news in the past, they probably have the PLA scrambling right now to find out if they own a company called Yu Wan Mei.
I know American-style sarcasm doesn't always translate well. My mother in law is unable to detect any of it, for example.
I figured.
anyone have an idea about Chinese Comedy? Does it exist and is it funny?
Very funny. :D
Quote from: saskganesh on July 21, 2009, 12:48:09 PM
anyone have an idea about Chinese Comedy? Does it exist and is it funny?
Jackie Chan can be amusing.
QuoteCollapsed Mine Used As Excuse To Stall Coal Extraction
CASSVILLE, WV—Although rescue workers have cleared a path wide enough for the usable coal to be extracted through, and miners trapped inside are not so hurt or oxygen-deprived that they could not continue with their tasks, Willard Energy officials decided to halt operations Monday following the collapse of one of their most profitable mines. Company CEO Kenneth Morgan, who should know better than to let emotion interfere with business, offered no explanation as to why paramedics currently digging out the miners are not also collecting coal, or at the very least sending back a load of the precious resource with every body they find. At press time, the Mine Safety and Health Administration has yet to investigate how this tragedy, which may leave tons of coal forever entombed, could have been prevented. 鱼
I like this new theme to the stories... :D
Sounds like the Onion has a very shaky grasp on the differences between Japanese and Chinese. I suppose it is to be expected.
Quote from: Jacob on July 21, 2009, 02:35:39 PM
Sounds like the Onion has a very shaky grasp on the differences between Japanese and Chinese. I suppose it is to be expected.
Wow I hope none of that applies to the Japanese.
Quote from: The Larch on July 21, 2009, 06:44:19 AM
http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/american_children_like_me_are?utm_source=a-section (http://www.theonion.com/content/opinion/american_children_like_me_are?utm_source=a-section)
No fucking way a kid with that face weighs 150 lbs.
Quote from: Valmy on July 21, 2009, 02:59:02 PMWow I hope none of that applies to the Japanese.
For one, the Chinese would not engage in bowing, for example "after subjecting me to a good 20 minutes of infernal bowing and other assorted chinky-dinkery". Incessant bowing is a Japanese thing, not Chinese.
That said, I guess it's not so much a matter confusing Japanese and Chinese (though there is that), but rather that the entire thing is making fun of a media created pan-Orientalist pastiche rather than anything real.
Quote from: Jacob on July 21, 2009, 03:17:42 PM
That said, I guess it's not so much a matter confusing Japanese and Chinese (though there is that), but rather that the entire thing is making fun of a media created pan-Orientalist pastiche rather than anything real.
Duh.
I suspect they might have covered the Chinese getting confused angle.
The Chinese version of the companies' website is un google translatable (maybe it explains wtf is happening?) and just what does the company name mean?
I'm going to try and get a Chinaman on this asap.
edit- nah, it just means fish perfect.
Apparently though the Chinese speakers on videos have crap accents.
Quote from: Jacob on July 21, 2009, 03:17:42 PM
Quote from: Valmy on July 21, 2009, 02:59:02 PMWow I hope none of that applies to the Japanese.
For one, the Chinese would not engage in bowing, for example "after subjecting me to a good 20 minutes of infernal bowing and other assorted chinky-dinkery". Incessant bowing is a Japanese thing, not Chinese.
That said, I guess it's not so much a matter confusing Japanese and Chinese (though there is that), but rather that the entire thing is making fun of a media created pan-Orientalist pastiche rather than anything real.
Yeah, but nobody really cares about the differences between the cultures, and the Chinese were slow on the ball. Because the Japanese had a good, acquisitive economy before the Chinese did, Oriental stereotypes are bound to be influenced by the older stuff from the eighties and nineties.
Quote from: Neil on July 21, 2009, 04:46:15 PMYeah, but nobody really cares about the differences between the cultures, and the Chinese were slow on the ball. Because the Japanese had a good, acquisitive economy before the Chinese did, Oriental stereotypes are bound to be influenced by the older stuff from the eighties and nineties.
Certainly.
That won't stop me from acting smug and superior towards the idiots who can't tell the difference :)
Quote from: Jacob on July 21, 2009, 05:43:06 PM
Quote from: Neil on July 21, 2009, 04:46:15 PMYeah, but nobody really cares about the differences between the cultures, and the Chinese were slow on the ball. Because the Japanese had a good, acquisitive economy before the Chinese did, Oriental stereotypes are bound to be influenced by the older stuff from the eighties and nineties.
Certainly.
That won't stop me from acting smug and superior towards the idiots who can't tell the difference :)
And that's certainly alright. I do the same thing, acting superior to people who think that Chinese are humans. Actually, I act superior towards just about everyone.
Quote from: Jacob on July 21, 2009, 03:17:42 PM
For one, the Chinese would not engage in bowing, for example "after subjecting me to a good 20 minutes of infernal bowing and other assorted chinky-dinkery". Incessant bowing is a Japanese thing, not Chinese.
That said, I guess it's not so much a matter confusing Japanese and Chinese (though there is that), but rather that the entire thing is making fun of a media created pan-Orientalist pastiche rather than anything real.
Infernal bowing is not incessant bowing. And infernal bowing can also known as "kowtowing", which is from Chinese mandarin. So yeah, for one, the Chinese would engage in bowing as we know it.
That said, stop being such an Asianazi.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on July 21, 2009, 06:30:09 PM
That said, stop being such an Asianazi.
He's gone native. Just like you'd like to do.
Quote from: Neil on July 21, 2009, 07:07:47 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on July 21, 2009, 06:30:09 PM
That said, stop being such an Asianazi.
He's gone native. Just like you'd like to do.
That's goddamned right.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on July 21, 2009, 06:30:09 PMInfernal bowing is not incessant bowing. And infernal bowing can also known as "kowtowing", which is from Chinese mandarin. So yeah, for one, the Chinese would engage in bowing as we know it.
Not in any kind of business deal. Maybe the girls you've banged did that as part of your roleplaying sessions or whatever, but it isn't part of any sort of business or normal social practice.
QuoteThat said, stop being such an Asianazi.
Why?
Quote from: Jacob on July 21, 2009, 07:42:12 PMMaybe the girls you've banged did that as part of your roleplaying sessions or whatever, but it isn't part of any sort of business or normal social practice.
Roleplaying sessions ARE business practices. :mad:
QuoteThat said, stop being such an Asianazi.
QuoteWhy?
Because it's the fucking Onion, that's why.
And besides, reminds me of all the humorless historitards getting bent out of shape over
300, and that's just not you.