It has been posted absolu-bloody-lutely everywhere. I'm sure you've all seen it.
A somewhat woman walks down the street behind a hidden camera and lots of guys try to speak to her, one or two of them become outright freaky.
As per usual I am skeptical of this video and the "OMG women have it so hard! Woo feminism!" conclusions everyone is drawing for it. Which has of course gotten me into trouble with some friends who seem to be taking it as a very 'with us or against us' issue.
First up....Is this not the way American dating culture is constructed? As always I am at pains to point out here that I am a long way from an expert and am just going from what I've learned from the media. But...isn't the way things work in America that guys are expected to hit on random girls and try and get their magical phone number?
Women like this system because it means they don't have to make the effort and they get free food so.... Yeah.
Secondly, and far more importantly with my criticism. Something that all the reporting has missed out on- the entire thing is schilling for a charity devoted to stopping "Street harassment". On that...well most of the stuff in the video wasn't harassment; some certain was, and a lot of the rest was rude, but most wasn't harassment.
And a charity for stopping street harassment? Sorry but...as lame as it may be for victims of it there are far more pressing problems out there for both people in general and feminists to be dealing with (domestic abuse anyone?). This has got to be one of the stupidest ideas for a charity ever.
This really ties into the growing modern trend for these oh so meaningful viral videos...they just annoy me. Nobody seems to get the idea of charity cannibalisation. These bandwagons that last for a month then dissapear...I mean can anyone even remember what charity that ice bucket thing was collecting for (not that most people realised it or donated)?
So yeah...there's my little rant. I'm curious to see the views of people on here since it isn't a place which toes the PC bandwagon jumping line.
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
First up....Is this not the way American dating culture is constructed?
No.
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
.I mean can anyone even remember what charity that ice bucket thing was collecting for (not that most people realised it or donated)?
ALS :smarty:
http://www.funnyordie.com/articles/ebf5e34fc8/10-hours-of-walking-in-nyc-as-a-man
I have to say I find it bizarre and when I was in NYC everybody looked to be rushing by not harrasing each other. But I am not a woman in NYC so how would I know it is not right? Generally I thought it was considered pretty douchey to cat call or talk to strange women alone on the street.
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
It has been posted absolu-bloody-lutely everywhere. I'm sure you've all seen it.
A somewhat woman walks down the street behind a hidden camera and lots of guys try to speak to her, one or two of them become outright freaky.
As per usual I am skeptical of this video and the "OMG women have it so hard! Woo feminism!" conclusions everyone is drawing for it. Which has of course gotten me into trouble with some friends who seem to be taking it as a very 'with us or against us' issue.
First up....Is this not the way American dating culture is constructed? As always I am at pains to point out here that I am a long way from an expert and am just going from what I've learned from the media. But...isn't the way things work in America that guys are expected to hit on random girls and try and get their magical phone number?
Somewhat attractive woman I assume?
No, no it's not.
To be fair, there were several instances shown that take a rather great stretch to call "harassment".
But not too much more than the overly creepy number.
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
I'm curious to see the views of people on here since it isn't a place which toes the PC bandwagon jumping line.
You're still a sociopath.
For the record, she is a hottie, and I would certainly admire her in passing. But I'm not the "hey baby, 'sup?" type. :sleep:
I tried out a piropo on a Colombian hottie that worked in my department at the IMF once and got her to blush.
Quote from: Tonitrus on October 30, 2014, 09:00:16 PM
For the record, she is a hottie, and I would certainly admire her in passing. But I'm not the "hey baby, 'sup?" type. :sleep:
She's quite the hottie, but you're supposed to notice her by not noticing her.
I never understood the need for cat calls and all that other bullshit, and hate being around guys that are. It's insulting and impolite. Act like you've been in the end zone before, and hand the ball to the ref. No need to spike it and dance like an idiot.
The proper, polite and gentlemanly thing to do is mind your tongue, don't ogle, and wait until you are home to masturbate. After you get her plates and find out where she lives.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 30, 2014, 09:06:15 PMAct like you've been in the end zone before, and hand the ball to the ref. No need to spike it and dance like an idiot.
Yeah, I always feel sorry for all the dudes you see posting blubbering comments on pretty girls' social media accounts as well. It's like I'm feeling the embarrassment they should be feeling but aren't. I pretty much think the catcallers are those same guys.
OTOH, it must work once in a while. I mean people don't continue behavior in large numbers if that behavior always fails to achieve a positive result. Maybe the funnyordie dude should do an experiment where he catcalls at women for ten hours and see how many numbers he gets. :P
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 30, 2014, 09:25:57 PM
OTOH, it must work once in a while. I mean people don't continue behavior in large numbers if that behavior always fails to achieve a positive result. Maybe the funnyordie dude should do an experiment where he catcalls at women for ten hours and see how many numbers he gets. :P
Are they actually cat calling to score numbers? If they are I guess I can see it but the sense I get it is more about just being a douche for the LOLs.
'How did you and mommy meed daddy?' 'Well I saw her walking down the street and she was hot so I said 'Daaayum girl'
Is not typically the story you expect :P
I just smugly assume that the guys who cat-call are the same types who would be become gang rapists in situations where society/law-and-order break down. :sleep:
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 30, 2014, 09:25:57 PM
OTOH, it must work once in a while. I mean people don't continue behavior in large numbers if that behavior always fails to achieve a positive result. Maybe the funnyordie dude should do an experiment where he catcalls at women for ten hours and see how many numbers he gets. :P
When I was taught how to sell door to door they said that even the most socially inept guy would make 1 sale in 30 if he spoke clearly and politely and that the same was true for asking out random women. I have not teasted that theory however.
Quote from: jimmy olsen on October 30, 2014, 11:46:13 PM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 30, 2014, 09:25:57 PM
OTOH, it must work once in a while. I mean people don't continue behavior in large numbers if that behavior always fails to achieve a positive result. Maybe the funnyordie dude should do an experiment where he catcalls at women for ten hours and see how many numbers he gets. :P
When I was taught how to sell door to door they said that even the most socially inept guy would make 1 sale in 30 if he spoke clearly and politely and that the same was true for asking out random women. I have not teasted that theory however.
It isn't true. :(
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxyySRgrYsU
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 30, 2014, 09:12:51 PM
It's like I'm feeling the embarrassment they should be feeling but aren't.
German has a word for that: "fremdschämen." :P
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/fremdsch%C3%A4men
On the video it wasnt all cat calling.
Some of it was; the old guys saying smile for instance. But going up to her and trying to speak to her isnt what i would class as cat calling.
As to the guys being rapists in the making.... The silent followers sure. But ive known guys into the whole american style pickup thing and though kinda creepy i dont think they would hurt anyone.
I'm not getting that many cat calls.
it's been done a few years ago in Brussel. The result wasn't nice.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 30, 2014, 01:37:39 PM
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
.I mean can anyone even remember what charity that ice bucket thing was collecting for (not that most people realised it or donated)?
ALS :smarty:
37, Warsaw, male? :unsure:
Quote from: Tyr on October 31, 2014, 02:43:11 AM
the whole american style pickup thing
:bleeding:
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
First up....Is this not the way American dating culture is constructed? As always I am at pains to point out here that I am a long way from an expert and am just going from what I've learned from the media. But...isn't the way things work in America that guys are expected to hit on random girls and try and get their magical phone number?
What the fuck, Tyr?
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 30, 2014, 09:06:15 PMThe proper, polite and gentlemanly thing to do is mind your tongue, don't ogle, and wait until you are home to masturbate. After you get her plates and find out where she lives.
:lmfao: :lmfao: :lmfao:
Quote from: The Brain on October 31, 2014, 02:48:40 AM
I'm not getting that many cat calls.
They never call, do they?
Quote from: Syt on October 31, 2014, 12:09:23 AM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 30, 2014, 09:12:51 PM
It's like I'm feeling the embarrassment they should be feeling but aren't.
German has a word for that: "fremdschämen." :P
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/fremdsch%C3%A4men
We have an expression in Spanish for that as well, "vergüenza ajena", literally "other people's shame". I have bundles of that, can't stand watching people making fools of themselves, must be the reason why I never enjoyed The Office. :P
Germans have a word for everything.
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 05:59:43 AM
Germans have a word for everything.
Do they have a word for having words for everything?
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 05:59:43 AM
Germans have a word for everything.
Unfortunately. "Handy", I'm looking at you. :glare:
Be careful not to confuse "handy" and "handsy". :yeahright:
Quote from: The Brain on October 31, 2014, 06:16:44 AM
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 05:59:43 AM
Germans have a word for everything.
Unfortunately. "Handy", I'm looking at you. :glare:
Yep that shit be lame.
I used to know a girl who was ~19-20 and gorgeous--she worked at the same restaurant as me, but also at a nightclub and did work at events like boxing matches and nascar. One day we went to the mall together after school had gotten out, and she got so many comments. One guy driving by actually yelled, "I want to fuck you!"
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
:bowler:
Quote from: Valmy on October 30, 2014, 08:31:58 PM
I have to say I find it bizarre and when I was in NYC everybody looked to be rushing by not harrasing each other. But I am not a woman in NYC so how would I know it is not right?
While the former might be true, that isn't true of catcalling.
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
Ditto Toronto. ;)
I don't think I've ever heard someone cat-calling a woman here ... indeed, any form of communication between strangers, unless absolutely necessary, is extremely unusual.
I've never looked at cat calling so much as attempts at having a conversation. Seems more akin to the crazy homeless man who can't help but shout out his crazy thoughts.
Quote from: garbon on October 31, 2014, 09:19:21 AM
I've never looked at cat calling so much as attempts at having a conversation. Seems more akin to the crazy homeless man who can't help but shout out his crazy thoughts.
The stereotype I have in my mind is of one guy impressing his crew of buddies with his boldness - the construction worker or the hooded gang-banger harrasing passing women while his friends grin and maybe join in.
That said, I've not really seen it in real life much.
We used to have an ugly old guy on the subway who would go to each woman and girl on the train, ask them politely if he could invite them for a beer, and if they refused he'd move on to the next one.
I wonder what became of him. :hmm:
I know they edited it out most of the white dudes(they said so in interviews) but It was quite telling that most of the cat-callers were drug dealers & drug dealers look alike.
btw, Tyr, I agree with out. Americans you are blind, this is how your dating culture starts for out of high school people.
Quote from: Malthus on October 31, 2014, 09:23:26 AM
Quote from: garbon on October 31, 2014, 09:19:21 AM
I've never looked at cat calling so much as attempts at having a conversation. Seems more akin to the crazy homeless man who can't help but shout out his crazy thoughts.
The stereotype I have in my mind is of one guy impressing his crew of buddies with his boldness - the construction worker or the hooded gang-banger harrasing passing women while his friends grin and maybe join in.
That said, I've not really seen it in real life much.
Well it isn't just that. Most recent example was this business woman walking in a skirt. Some young guy gave some sort of "compliment" - she smiled awkwardly while walking away and then he gave another. End scene.
Quote from: garbon on October 31, 2014, 09:52:43 AM
Quote from: Malthus on October 31, 2014, 09:23:26 AM
Quote from: garbon on October 31, 2014, 09:19:21 AM
I've never looked at cat calling so much as attempts at having a conversation. Seems more akin to the crazy homeless man who can't help but shout out his crazy thoughts.
The stereotype I have in my mind is of one guy impressing his crew of buddies with his boldness - the construction worker or the hooded gang-banger harrasing passing women while his friends grin and maybe join in.
That said, I've not really seen it in real life much.
Well it isn't just that. Most recent example was this business woman walking in a skirt. Some young guy gave some sort of "compliment" - she smiled awkwardly while walking away and then he gave another. End scene.
Heh, some guy complemented a random stranger on their looks in Toronto on the street or transit, I'd be frozen in shock. :lol:
Quote from: Grey Fox on October 31, 2014, 09:34:56 AM
I know they edited it out most of the white dudes(they said so in interviews) but It was quite telling that most of the cat-callers were drug dealers & drug dealers look alike.
btw, Tyr, I agree with out. Americans you are blind, this is how your dating culture starts for out of high school people.
What the fuck, Grey Fox?
There is a difference between hitting on a single girl in bar by offering to buy her a drink and approaching a complete stranger in the broad daylight in the street. Anyone who does not understand that is either a pervert or a sociopath.
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:02:19 AM
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
You would so love Toronto.* Home of severe repression, particularly in public. ;)
*Well, except for the weather. No-one loves Toronto's weather.
The mentality of cat-calling some girl on the sidewalk is so foreign to me. I've never had the slightest urge to do that, nor have I ever known a guy who would.
I'm thinking it's just a lower-class thing.
Quote from: Malthus on October 31, 2014, 10:04:43 AM
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:02:19 AM
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
You would so love Toronto.* Home of severe repression, particularly in public. ;)
*Well, except for the weather. No-one loves Toronto's weather.
Places with shitty weather is what Polish immigrants love. That's why so many Poles moved to Chicago of all places.
I was wondering if the person with the camera was visible to the bystanders. If so, they may have thought the woman was an actress or some kind of celeb and that spurred some of the comments on how nice she looked because they thought they were talking to a celebrity.
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:01:11 AM
Quote from: Grey Fox on October 31, 2014, 09:34:56 AM
I know they edited it out most of the white dudes(they said so in interviews) but It was quite telling that most of the cat-callers were drug dealers & drug dealers look alike.
btw, Tyr, I agree with out. Americans you are blind, this is how your dating culture starts for out of high school people.
What the fuck, Grey Fox?
There is a difference between hitting on a single girl in bar by offering to buy her a drink and approaching a complete stranger in the broad daylight in the street. Anyone who does not understand that is either a pervert or a sociopath.
Yes, American dating culture has been misinterpreted by scores of millenials that are turning into sociopaths.
Quote from: derspiess on October 31, 2014, 10:06:18 AM
The mentality of cat-calling some girl on the sidewalk is so foreign to me. I've never had the slightest urge to do that, nor have I ever known a guy who would.
I'm thinking it's just a lower-class thing.
Yeah. Of course, I can imagine from the women's perspective it can be pretty threatening or at least uncomfortable even if this is "only" done by lower class men.
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:10:54 AM
Quote from: derspiess on October 31, 2014, 10:06:18 AM
The mentality of cat-calling some girl on the sidewalk is so foreign to me. I've never had the slightest urge to do that, nor have I ever known a guy who would.
I'm thinking it's just a lower-class thing.
Yeah. Of course, I can imagine from the women's perspective it can be pretty threatening or at least uncomfortable even if this is "only" done by lower class men.
I'm detecting sarcasm but I'm not sure I'm seeing your point.
Quote from: derspiess on October 31, 2014, 10:06:18 AM
The mentality of cat-calling some girl on the sidewalk is so foreign to me. I've never had the slightest urge to do that, nor have I ever known a guy who would.
I'm thinking it's just a lower-class thing.
Are you familiar with the Argentinian piropo?
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:10:54 AM
Yeah. Of course, I can imagine from the women's perspective it can be pretty threatening or at least uncomfortable even if this is "only" done by lower class men.
Well right. You do not talk to women alone on the street for this reason. The fear is also why these jerks can get away with it.
Quote from: Valmy on October 31, 2014, 10:17:13 AM
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:10:54 AM
Yeah. Of course, I can imagine from the women's perspective it can be pretty threatening or at least uncomfortable even if this is "only" done by lower class men.
Well right. You do not talk to women alone on the street for this reason. The fear is also why these jerks can get away with it.
They can get away with it because, literally, there is nothing to stop them - assuming their own embarassment or sense of the impropriety of harrasing someone like that doesn't (as it certainly would stop me ;) ).
Complementing someone in public, however disquieting, isn't illegal, and most women aren't about to start a fight over it; nor will strangers step in, unless the complimenter/harrasser does something more.
Quote from: Tyr on October 30, 2014, 01:29:24 PM
It has been posted absolu-bloody-lutely everywhere. I'm sure you've all seen it.
For the record, this is a poor way to start a thread. :thumbsdown:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0uQInTECI4
part of the brussels version
90s NYC version: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_Q-Y3dllVQ
Quote from: Crazy_Ivan80 on October 31, 2014, 10:28:45 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0uQInTECI4
part of the brussels version
It seems this is too brutally sexist for American eyes.
Are the harrasers Walloons or Flems?
Quote from: Valmy on October 31, 2014, 10:36:59 AM
Is that some sort of forbidden dance?
Clever lines for pretty girls on the street.
The classic is
Que curvas,
y yo sin frenas.
What curves,
and my brakes are out.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 30, 2014, 09:06:15 PM
Quote from: Tonitrus on October 30, 2014, 09:00:16 PM
For the record, she is a hottie, and I would certainly admire her in passing. But I'm not the "hey baby, 'sup?" type. :sleep:
She's quite the hottie, but you're supposed to notice her by not noticing her.
I never understood the need for cat calls and all that other bullshit, and hate being around guys that are. It's insulting and impolite. Act like you've been in the end zone before, and hand the ball to the ref. No need to spike it and dance like an idiot.
The proper, polite and gentlemanly thing to do is mind your tongue, don't ogle, and wait until you are home to masturbate. After you get her plates and find out where she lives.
POTM.
I don't see the problem with ogling.
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 10:58:11 AM
I don't see the problem with ogling.
It is not polite to stare at people -_-
Quote from: alfred russel on October 31, 2014, 08:38:24 AM
I used to know a girl who was ~19-20 and gorgeous--she worked at the same restaurant as me, but also at a nightclub and did work at events like boxing matches and nascar. One day we went to the mall together after school had gotten out, and she got so many comments. One guy driving by actually yelled, "I want to fuck you!"
So basically if I'd been born a gorgeous woman, I'd have been happy. Called it.
Quote from: Valmy on October 31, 2014, 10:58:54 AM
It is not polite to stare at people -_-
In my experience nice looking girls enjoy being looked at and appreciated.
I'll only allow a gentleman to approach after his manservant brings me his card, then my chaperone will arrange a respectable meeting place.
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:02:19 AM
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
In all fairness though, it seems the occasional outburst in the UK is every weekend where it is apparently mandatory to scream loudly on the street when you are drunk. And then drink until you pass out on said street, because otherwise you are a social outcast.
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 11:00:39 AM
Quote from: Valmy on October 31, 2014, 10:58:54 AM
It is not polite to stare at people -_-
In my experience nice looking girls enjoy being looked at and appreciated.
While chubby girls make videos of black men trying to pick them up.
Quote from: Ideologue on October 31, 2014, 10:59:48 AM
So basically if I'd been born a gorgeous woman, I'd have been happy. Called it.
Ide, it is not external factors that make you unhappy, it's your habit of self-pity.
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 10:58:11 AM
I don't see the problem with ogling.
As long as one is discreet about it, I don't either.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 31, 2014, 11:08:38 AM
While chubby girls make videos of black men trying to pick them up.
Black dudes love big girls. It's a match made in heaven.
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 11:00:39 AM
In my experience nice looking girls enjoy being looked at and appreciated.
I very much enjoy looking at and appreciating nice looking girls, so we're coming from the same place.
That said, it's been communicated to me that in many cases nice looking girls feign appreciation at attention from strangers because they've had enough bad experiences from not doing so, that feigning appreciation seems safer. Apparently, sometimes what starts out as appreciation very quickly turns into threats of violence and rape if the appreciator is dissatisfied with the response. I believe both of the videos linked in this thread illustrates that process.
It kind of sucks.
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 11:10:39 AM
Quote from: Ideologue on October 31, 2014, 10:59:48 AM
So basically if I'd been born a gorgeous woman, I'd have been happy. Called it.
Ide, it is not external factors that make you unhappy, it's your habit of self-pity.
I guess he figures it'd be hard to pity himself with the constant external validation. I think he's probably wrong. Besides, women get older too.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 31, 2014, 11:17:27 AM
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 11:10:39 AM
Quote from: Ideologue on October 31, 2014, 10:59:48 AM
So basically if I'd been born a gorgeous woman, I'd have been happy. Called it.
Ide, it is not external factors that make you unhappy, it's your habit of self-pity.
I guess he figures it'd be hard to pity himself with the constant external validation.
:)
QuoteBesides, women get older too.
Truly. :(
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 11:14:27 AM
Black dudes love big girls. It's a match made in heaven.
The brothers are really big on the whole impregnation and breeding thing, too. But it's not overtly hostile enough to be considered getting back at Whitey so it must be something tribal, like how wealth is measured by the amount of children or something.
Weird, weird stuff.
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 31, 2014, 11:17:27 AM
I guess he figures it'd be hard to pity himself with the constant external validation. I think he's probably wrong. Besides, women get older too.
Yeah, that's what he figures but the world has plenty of fucked up, unhappy, pretty rich kids. Just because a bunch of people want to fuck you doesn't mean you're going to be happy. It's been amply illustrated that plenty of people have serious issues that they're willing to take out on the people they want to and/or do fuck.
Quote from: derspiess on October 31, 2014, 11:13:56 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 10:58:11 AM
I don't see the problem with ogling.
As long as one is discreet about it, I don't either.
If you are being discrete it is not really ogling.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 31, 2014, 11:21:09 AM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 11:14:27 AM
Black dudes love big girls. It's a match made in heaven.
The brothers are really big on the whole impregnation and breeding thing, too. But it's not overtly hostile enough to be considered getting back at Whitey so it must be something tribal, like how wealth is measured by the amount of children or something.
Weird, weird stuff.
Which is unfortunate given how having lots of kids generally indicates you are going to be paying out all your wealth in child support.
:lol: Good one, Valmy.
Quote from: Valmy on October 31, 2014, 11:24:10 AM
Which is unfortunate given how having lots of kids generally indicates you are going to be paying out all your wealth in child support.
Lulz, like that ever gets paid.
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 11:21:43 AM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on October 31, 2014, 11:17:27 AM
I guess he figures it'd be hard to pity himself with the constant external validation. I think he's probably wrong. Besides, women get older too.
Yeah, that's what he figures but the world has plenty of fucked up, unhappy, pretty rich kids. Just because a bunch of people want to fuck you doesn't mean you're going to be happy. It's been amply illustrated that plenty of people have serious issues that they're willing to take out on the people they want to and/or do fuck.
Sure, everybody hurts, sometimes.
Anyway, I'm
being glib. Street harassment (when it rises to level of harassment) is shitty.
Also, I've been to gay bars and it's validating for like ten minutes and fucking obnoxious for the next three hours. Admittedly, the validation is invalid when it's coming from someone you're constitutionally not interested in.
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 11:15:57 AM
I very much enjoy looking at and appreciating nice looking girls, so we're coming from the same place.
That said, it's been communicated to me that in many cases nice looking girls feign appreciation at attention from strangers because they've had enough bad experiences from not doing so, that feigning appreciation seems safer. Apparently, sometimes what starts out as appreciation very quickly turns into threats of violence and rape if the appreciator is dissatisfied with the response. I believe both of the videos linked in this thread illustrates that process.
It kind of sucks.
I think the line is generally crossed when you open your mouth.
Quote from: derspiess on October 31, 2014, 11:25:44 AM
:lol: Good one, Valmy.
I know I need to stop presuming people are going to do the right thing.
Quote from: Ideologue on October 31, 2014, 11:27:19 AM
Also, I've been to gay bars and it's validating for like ten minutes and fucking obnoxious for the next three hours. Admittedly, the validation is invalid when it's coming from someone you're constitutionally not interested in.
You skinny ones certainly get the whistles. Don't want to be bothered by gays, take a chapter out of my book,
"Stout Like Me". :P
Quote from: Tamas on October 31, 2014, 11:07:23 AM
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:02:19 AM
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
In all fairness though, it seems the occasional outburst in the UK is every weekend where it is apparently mandatory to scream loudly on the street when you are drunk. And then drink until you pass out on said street, because otherwise you are a social outcast.
:yes:
http://thyra10.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/so-you-want-to-date-a-scandinavian/
(Brits and Scandinavians have more in common than is realised).
Quote from: Tamas on October 31, 2014, 11:07:23 AM
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:02:19 AM
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
In all fairness though, it seems the occasional outburst in the UK is every weekend where it is apparently mandatory to scream loudly on the street when you are drunk. And then drink until you pass out on said street, because otherwise you are a social outcast.
Then you would prefer Toronto.
Even when drunk, we still act repressed. :D
Quote from: Tyr on October 31, 2014, 12:14:18 PM
http://thyra10.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/so-you-want-to-date-a-scandinavian/
(Brits and Scandinavians have more in common than is realised).
Pretty accurate. But I don't see how this difference in culture is meant to be the reason for catcalls. If you walk in the wrong neighbourhoods in Copenhagen there'll be douchebags yelling inappropriate or threatening things too, of course there's not nearly as many people here so it'll probably take longer to get to a 100 but it'll come.
Quote from: Malthus on October 31, 2014, 12:16:00 PM
Then you would prefer Toronto.
Even when drunk, we still act repressed. :D
Or maybe you just don't go to the louder parts of town. :hmm:
Course this whole thing is really odd to me. Nobody talks to each other traveling down the street and if they tried, nobody would hear them. The windows get in the way. :D
10 hours walking in Skyrim as a woman in skimpy armor (video is 1:20)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gEAC7nl5n2g#t=50
Quote from: Liep on October 31, 2014, 12:29:02 PM
Quote from: Tyr on October 31, 2014, 12:14:18 PM
http://thyra10.wordpress.com/2013/08/31/so-you-want-to-date-a-scandinavian/
(Brits and Scandinavians have more in common than is realised).
Pretty accurate. But I don't see how this difference in culture is meant to be the reason for catcalls. If you walk in the wrong neighbourhoods in Copenhagen there'll be douchebags yelling inappropriate or threatening things too, of course there's not nearly as many people here so it'll probably take longer to get to a 100 but it'll come.
Its not just cat calls though, most of it is guys just trying to say hello.
Quote from: Liep on October 31, 2014, 12:29:02 PM
Pretty accurate. But I don't see how this difference in culture is meant to be the reason for catcalls. If you walk in the wrong neighbourhoods in Copenhagen there'll be douchebags yelling inappropriate or threatening things too, of course there's not nearly as many people here so it'll probably take longer to get to a 100 but it'll come.
Well the original NYC girl was admittedly doing this in the city in the US most known for rudeness and also probably knew the best streets to walk to in order to get this negative attention. I've literally never seen this happen in real life, but I don't hang out in the Bronx.
Quote from: Valmy on October 31, 2014, 10:35:27 AM
Quote from: Crazy_Ivan80 on October 31, 2014, 10:28:45 AM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H0uQInTECI4
part of the brussels version
It seems this is too brutally sexist for American eyes.
Are the harrasers Walloons or Flems?
generally immigrants (often muslims).
it's Brussels, barely any local people left between the eurocrats and the migrants
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 01:31:05 PM
Well the original NYC girl was admittedly doing this in the city in the US most known for rudeness and also probably knew the best streets to walk to in order to get this negative attention. I've literally never seen this happen in real life, but I don't hang out in the Bronx.
Also, you're not a young woman walking through town unaccompanied.
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 01:55:39 PM
Also, you're not a young woman walking through town unaccompanied.
He's probably seen young women walking through town unaccompanied.
Yes, and I walk often accompanied by women who get plenty of thirsty looks. :P
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 02:00:47 PM
He's probably seen young women walking through town unaccompanied.
As have I.
I believe it's not uncommon to have different perceptions of events that are targeted directly at you compared to those that target others unlike you.
For example, elsewhere I was arguing in response to this video that there are some cultural differences in play and that we don't see this kind of cat-calling in the parts of Canada I live in. Because, you know, I've never really seen it at all.
In response I was informed by several young women party to the discussion that they do in fact experience cat-calling on a weekly basis, and they do live in the same part of Canada as I.
So yeah, maybe it's down to a difference in vantage points.
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 01:31:05 PM
I've literally never seen this happen in real life, but I don't hang out in the Bronx.
I'm in the village and the example I gave Malthus happened here this week.
Quote from: garbon on October 31, 2014, 02:15:52 PM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 01:31:05 PM
I've literally never seen this happen in real life, but I don't hang out in the Bronx.
I'm the village
A bit more humility, please, young man.
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 02:10:03 PM
Quote from: Admiral Yi on October 31, 2014, 02:00:47 PM
He's probably seen young women walking through town unaccompanied.
As have I.
I believe it's not uncommon to have different perceptions of events that are targeted directly at you compared to those that target others unlike you.
For example, elsewhere I was arguing in response to this video that there are some cultural differences in play and that we don't see this kind of cat-calling in the parts of Canada I live in. Because, you know, I've never really seen it at all.
In response I was informed by several young women party to the discussion that they do in fact experience cat-calling on a weekly basis, and they do live in the same part of Canada as I.
So yeah, maybe it's down to a difference in vantage points.
Agreed. I don't generally notice people being catcalled when I'm walking around but know that my sisters experienced/experience fairly often during the course of the year.
Quote from: Syt on October 31, 2014, 02:16:58 PM
Quote from: garbon on October 31, 2014, 02:15:52 PM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 01:31:05 PM
I've literally never seen this happen in real life, but I don't hang out in the Bronx.
I'm the village
A bit more humility, please, young man.
:lol:
:blush:
in the village. :(
Le Village c'est lui.
I do notice from time to time a certain...call it social pressure from other guys. Like a few months ago I was sitting on a bench waiting for a tram in Vienna and my wife went to a wurstelstand to get a snack. I was sitting there playing with my camera setting to see if I could get good night shots. So I take some pics of her order the sausage. This sounds way dirtier than it is. :P
Anyway these dudes nearby who didn't see us show up together start giving me dirty looks. Like I'm perving on a pretty girl in the street. There's a sort of, I don't know, protectiveness? I think it's the guy version of when all the girls in the room hate the prettiest one.
Quote from: Jacob on October 31, 2014, 02:10:03 PM
In response I was informed by several young women party to the discussion that they do in fact experience cat-calling on a weekly basis, and they do live in the same part of Canada as I.
So yeah, maybe it's down to a difference in vantage points.
I have seen young women getting cat called here from everything from construction workers to guys in suits. On one comical occasion a guy in a suit cat called a woman approaching me. The timing was just right for it to look like she and I were meeting on the street. The cat call died in his throat as he looked up at me. The girl and I both had a laugh and carried on our way...
I think that is a good illustration of what Jacob is talking about.
I'd like to hear from a person who has done a catcall. Why did you do it? What's the purpose?
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 03:19:51 PM
I'd like to hear from a person who has done a catcall. Why did you do it? What's the purpose?
I knew a guy in university who did it all the time. He did it because it was sometimes successful.
Quote from: crazy canuck on October 31, 2014, 03:21:19 PM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 03:19:51 PM
I'd like to hear from a person who has done a catcall. Why did you do it? What's the purpose?
I knew a guy in university who did it all the time. He did it because it was sometimes successful.
I guess I feel a little differently about it if you are actually trying to get with the women in question. But I think that is a minority of cat callers.
Quote from: Tamas on October 31, 2014, 11:07:23 AM
Quote from: Martinus on October 31, 2014, 10:02:19 AM
Quote from: Brazen on October 31, 2014, 08:44:38 AM
She should move to London where no strangers will talk to her ever.
I so love societies like this. Feelings are meant to be repressed and/or let out in an occassional outburst, not shared.
In all fairness though, it seems the occasional outburst in the UK is every weekend where it is apparently mandatory to scream loudly on the street when you are drunk. And then drink until you pass out on said street, because otherwise you are a social outcast.
Just like Korea! :w00t:
Well, remember, you're not in Best Korea.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=7DCDYSJwwE4
10 hours as white man in New York: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EC21NF5rbSk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVD4RvsjbVc&src_vid=uP1Vxu2erq4&feature=iv&annotation_id=annotation_3342003099
Some people agree with me & Tyr on how this is how America dates.
Quote from: crazy canuck on October 31, 2014, 03:21:19 PM
Quote from: MadImmortalMan on October 31, 2014, 03:19:51 PM
I'd like to hear from a person who has done a catcall. Why did you do it? What's the purpose?
I knew a guy in university who did it all the time. He did it because it was sometimes successful.
:bleeding: Like I've said before, women can help themselves by not responding favorably to crap like this.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on October 30, 2014, 09:06:15 PM
Quote from: Tonitrus on October 30, 2014, 09:00:16 PM
For the record, she is a hottie, and I would certainly admire her in passing. But I'm not the "hey baby, 'sup?" type. :sleep:
...
I Act like you've been in the end zone before, and hand the ball to the ref. No need to spike it and dance like an idiot.
...
qft
and assume the close... right after you ask the waiter for the check turn to your date and say "I trust you have plenty of lube as I dont want to take a pregnancy risk on the first date."
"3 hours of walking in New York as a homosexual" video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6-ZYSZoDM
Still can't decide if it is a parody or serious. :hmm:
Quote from: Martinus on November 19, 2014, 10:36:48 AM
"3 hours of walking in New York as a homosexual" video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6-ZYSZoDM
Still can't decide if it is a parody or serious. :hmm:
I guess it would be "devastating" if that's what homosexuals in NYC had to go through daily. :hmm:
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:40:38 AM
Quote from: Martinus on November 19, 2014, 10:36:48 AM
"3 hours of walking in New York as a homosexual" video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6-ZYSZoDM
Still can't decide if it is a parody or serious. :hmm:
I guess it would be "devastating" if that's what homosexuals in NYC had to go through daily. :hmm:
It would be even more devastating if that is what homosexuals in NYC looked like.
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
Quote from: Martinus on November 19, 2014, 10:41:34 AM
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:40:38 AM
Quote from: Martinus on November 19, 2014, 10:36:48 AM
"3 hours of walking in New York as a homosexual" video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ls6-ZYSZoDM
Still can't decide if it is a parody or serious. :hmm:
I guess it would be "devastating" if that's what homosexuals in NYC had to go through daily. :hmm:
It would be even more devastating if that is what homosexuals in NYC looked like.
Well, some certainly do. We're a pretty wide community and maybe it would behoove you to be a little more tolerant? :blurgh:
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 19, 2014, 10:46:25 AM
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
The other day I shouted out "fuck you" to a man who bulldozed into me on the sidewalk - while I was on the phone with one of my salespeople. :blush:
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:59:19 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 19, 2014, 10:46:25 AM
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
The other day I shouted out "fuck you" to a man who bulldozed into me on the sidewalk - while I was on the phone with one of my salespeople. :blush:
Get off the sidewalk phone talker.
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:59:19 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 19, 2014, 10:46:25 AM
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
The other day I shouted out "fuck you" to a man who bulldozed into me on the sidewalk - while I was on the phone with one of my salespeople. :blush:
(https://languish.org/forums/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lmltbezwbf1qiz3j8o1_500.gif&hash=13f27638225e1ca22516fbfbd1db8ac5fa0a1f47)
Quote from: Grey Fox on November 19, 2014, 11:10:40 AM
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:59:19 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 19, 2014, 10:46:25 AM
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
The other day I shouted out "fuck you" to a man who bulldozed into me on the sidewalk - while I was on the phone with one of my salespeople. :blush:
Get off the sidewalk phone talker.
I was politely standing on the edge of the sidewalk as I didn't want to be one of those people who slowly walks where people are trying to get by. :angry:
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:59:19 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 19, 2014, 10:46:25 AM
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
The other day I shouted out "fuck you" to a man who bulldozed into me on the sidewalk - while I was on the phone with one of my salespeople. :blush:
Did he take you up on the offer?
So ... the takeaway message here is that, as a generality, New Yorkers are rude and abusive? :hmm:
Quote from: derspiess on November 19, 2014, 12:02:22 PM
Quote from: garbon on November 19, 2014, 10:59:19 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 19, 2014, 10:46:25 AM
LOL "What the fuck is your problem, man?"
In New York, that's not limited to gays.
The other day I shouted out "fuck you" to a man who bulldozed into me on the sidewalk - while I was on the phone with one of my salespeople. :blush:
Did he take you up on the offer?
:x