Peter Pan Syndrome and Sexual Economics

[Valmy]

So perhaps, ultimately, the conclusion is that gender roles started to disappear and the dynamics now works both ways when it comes to heterosexual couples and not just with men being always "providers".

'Started'?  Pretty sure this has been going on for awhile now.  Everybody except the pretty well off need both partners working.

But I am not sure what that has to do with the phenonmenon we are discussing in the article.  Do gay men also have a hard time growing up and working hard in their careers or whatever if they have sex?

[Martinus]

So perhaps, ultimately, the conclusion is that gender roles started to disappear and the dynamics now works both ways when it comes to heterosexual couples and not just with men being always "providers".

'Started'?  Pretty sure this has been going on for awhile now.  Everybody except the pretty well off need both partners working.

But I am not sure what that has to do with the phenonmenon we are discussing in the article.  Do gay men also have a hard time growing up and working hard in their careers or whatever if they have sex?

It's easier to find casual sex but it's harder to keep a relationship going (compared to heterosexual couples).

[Malthus]

Incidentally, I think gay men (or perhaps equally well gay women but that's the area I know nothing about) are perhaps a better group to study these tendencies as you do not have to provide for actual (or imagined) gender differences...

And despite the lack of such differences, age difference is more frequent than not, with all the sugar daddy/cougar/boy toy/trophy wife mechanics in place.

So perhaps, ultimately, the conclusion is that gender roles started to disappear and the dynamics now works both ways when it comes to heterosexual couples and not just with men being always "providers".

Gay men traditionally did not make good analogies for straight relationships for the simple reason that, in the past, gay relationships were not as public and socially-acceptable as straight ones and so were not subjected to the same social pressures (this is I think slowly changing what with gay marriage and all).

What the article in the OP misses, in large part, is the significance of these social pressures to the average person.

For example, most men work hard, not just to "get sex", but because they wish to have high social status (or put less baldly, they wish their families and friends to think well of them). In the past, social status was gained by women by "marrying well", but can now be gained by professional accomplishments, just like men, etc. For middle-class types at least, there still exists a certain amount of stigma associated with obviously unbalanced-in-status relationships. 

Gay men, being subject already to middle-class social disapproval (again, traditionally and this is changing - in my city for example it is only true among the minority these days), are going to have a very different dynamic. 

[Legbiter]

I could take what you wrote, and remark that women switch from craving "alpha" males to settling with plain providers not when they have enough of being abused, but when they feel they are nearing the end of their prime.

And in fact you'd be very correct. A significant amount of women now spend their hottest years riding around on the cock carousel until the Wall beckons and they jump off into the arms of a moist-eyed herb, there to provide a family and retirement from the carousel before the last remaining eggs dry out. Those who fail to exit on time, or misjudge their jump, splatter badly/turn into cat ladies, and serve as a warning to the next generation.

With men you get the same effect via the WOW basement dwelling introvert demographic that disease, accidents, violence and war used to take care of before.

What this means is a bonanza for the man with enough mojo to give women what they want.

[Warspite]

Discussions about sex and relationships here always seem to have a tinge of bitterness about them.

[mongers]

Discussions about sex and relationships here always seem to have a tinge of bitterness about them.

No I think the real bitterness is with those here who aren't discussing it. 

[CountDeMoney]

Discussions about sex and relationships here always seem to have a tinge of bitterness about them.

No I think the real bitterness is with those here who aren't discussing it. 

Treat the queens like whores, and the whores like queens.

Fin.

[garbon]

Discussions about sex and relationships here always seem to have a tinge of bitterness about them.

No I think the real bitterness is with those here who aren't discussing it. 

Treat the queens like whores, and the whores like queens.

Fin.

Don't you treat me like a whore.

[CountDeMoney]

Yeah, sure...the lips say "no", but the eyes say "spank me like a naughty, naughty 5th grade math teacher".

[garbon]

Yeah, sure...the lips say "no", but the eyes say "spank me like a naughty, naughty 5th grade math teacher".

You'd better check yourself, before you wreck yourself.

[Eddie Teach]

Yeah, sure...the lips say "no", but the eyes say "spank me like a naughty, naughty 5th grade math teacher".

You'd better check yourself, before you wreck yourself.

He said a math teacher, not a P.E. teacher.

[CountDeMoney]

Yeah, sure...the lips say "no", but the eyes say "spank me like a naughty, naughty 5th grade math teacher".

You'd better check yourself, before you wreck yourself.

Naughty, naughty actuary?

[garbon]

Yeah mentioning DGul really does it for me.

[Brazen]

How does that work for older women? "Pretend I'm your teacher. Undermine my authority"?

[Valmy]

Discussions about sex and relationships here always seem to have a tinge of bitterness about them.

Well it is sort of hard for anybody to discuss these issues without it bringing up their particular past