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Dazzling Urbanite managers, to me!

Started by CountDeMoney, May 12, 2009, 05:28:47 AM

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CountDeMoney

May 12, 2009, 05:28:47 AM
Why is it that dazzling urbanites can't stay healthy?

My previous dazzling urbanite missed a shitload of work because she was constantly enemic.  Luckily, I got to fire her for theft.

My new dazzling urbanite, the one I've had since November, is wonderful to work with, but goddamn if she doesn't have asthma issues and calls in sick when the pollen count is too high.

Who the fuck gets sick over allergies?  What the fuck?  Why the fuck can't black people stay healthy?

/rant off.

Caliga

#1
May 12, 2009, 05:31:37 AM Last Edit: May 12, 2009, 05:36:09 AM by Caliga
I had a dazzling urbanite employee who was actually quite reliable, except for the time she had to be out for surgery on her FUM.*

She eventually quit after deciding everyone in the department was out to get her and was racidistic, though.  She unsuccessfully tried to sue us at least twice, too.


* 'thumb' for those of you who don't speak jive.  :)
0 Ed Anger Disapproval Points

Olive

#2
May 12, 2009, 06:04:55 AM
This is funny. Nice rant. :)

Darth Wagtaros

#3
May 12, 2009, 06:28:52 AM
Quote from: Olive on May 12, 2009, 06:04:55 AM
This is funny. Nice rant. :)
Fo realz?
PDH!

Grey Fox

#4
May 12, 2009, 06:46:35 AM
It's the swinez fluz my nizzle, fo' shizzle.
Colonel Caliga is Awesome.

derspiess

#5
May 12, 2009, 08:58:51 AM
My department is pretty solid in that regard.  I bring in KFC & Chick-fil-a, and reap all sorts of goodwill.
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

Ed Anger

#6
May 12, 2009, 09:10:52 AM
Quote from: derspiess on May 12, 2009, 08:58:51 AM
My department is pretty solid in that regard.  I bring in KFC & Chick-fil-a, and reap all sorts of goodwill.

hyuk, hyuk.
Stay Alive...Let the Man Drive

Valmy

#7
May 12, 2009, 09:12:14 AM
Quote from: derspiess on May 12, 2009, 08:58:51 AM
I bring in KFC & Chick-fil-a, and reap all sorts of goodwill.

Doh

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MadImmortalMan

#8
May 12, 2009, 11:16:02 AM
Just have her go to the doctor and get the shots. They work like a fucking miracle, and I can't imagine your health plan won't cover at least most of it.
"Stability is destabilizing." --Hyman Minsky

"Complacency can be a self-denying prophecy."
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garbon

#9
May 12, 2009, 11:31:01 AM
I used to get sick all the time with allergies as a kid. Meds are better now. :)
"I've never been quite sure what the point of a eunuch is, if truth be told. It seems to me they're only men with the useful bits cut off."

I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim.

derspiess

#10
May 12, 2009, 12:53:00 PM
Quote from: Valmy on May 12, 2009, 09:12:14 AM
Doh

It's true.  I've done pizza, sandwiches, etc. but nothing got the reaction the chicken got. 
"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

Josquius

#11
May 12, 2009, 12:53:46 PM
Dazzling urbanite? Explain please? It doesn't just mean black people does it, its something more...
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derspiess

#12
May 12, 2009, 12:59:06 PM
Quote from: Tyr on May 12, 2009, 12:53:46 PM
Dazzling urbanite? Explain please? It doesn't just mean black people does it, its something more...

I think it means just that.  It's a "Blazing Saddles" reference, btw.

"If you can play a guitar and harmonica at the same time, like Bob Dylan or Neil Young, you're a genius. But make that extra bit of effort and strap some cymbals to your knees, suddenly people want to get the hell away from you."  --Rich Hall

Caliga

#13
May 12, 2009, 01:09:57 PM
Quote from: derspiess on May 12, 2009, 12:59:06 PMI think it means just that.  It's a "Blazing Saddles" reference, btw.

:lol: I totally forgot about that, but you're right.
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Savonarola

#14
May 12, 2009, 01:21:51 PM
Quote from: derspiess on May 12, 2009, 12:53:00 PM
Quote from: Valmy on May 12, 2009, 09:12:14 AM
Doh

It's true.  I've done pizza, sandwiches, etc. but nothing got the reaction the chicken got.

Did you bring orange soda too?
In Italy, for thirty years under the Borgias, they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they had brotherly love, they had five hundred years of democracy and peace—and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock
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