Barrister's obnoxious thread full of smug parenting stories

[derspiess]

My son is just over 14 months and i'm sure like every child that age is curious about everything.  Today he was reaching out and touching our unlit gas fireplace, pulling the panel at the bottom down and pulling on the wires, slapping the glass, etc.  The wife noticed him doing it and said "No touch" while I, a little more sharply than intended loudly shouted "HEY!".  He turned around, looked a little unsure, then went full quiver-lip cry.  I felt terrible.

You'll get used to it.  My kids may hate me sometimes but they do what I say.

[crazy canuck]

You'll get used to it. 

PRC, if you do you are doing something wrong. 

[Barrister]

So Grandma's been staying with us to help look after the boys during the day.

Yesterday, grandma took the boys down to the pond to feed the geese that are flying south for the winter.  Timmy was quite taken with this.

When they got home (at around the same time I did) he asks "Daddy can I be a goose?"  I said "sure".

So for the next ten minutes he's walking around on all fours going "honk honk honk!"

Then he decides he's hungry, and says "the goose wants bread".  He then insisted we feed him pieces of bread into his mouth.

The thing is, he's such a picky eater that if he wants to just eat dry bread like a goose, we let him.

[derspiess]

You'll get used to it. 

PRC, if you do you are doing something wrong. 

I meant you'll get used to feeling guilty.  Not that you wouldn't feel guilt.

[merithyn]

I meant you'll get used to feeling guilty.  Not that you wouldn't feel guilt.

I understood what you meant.

[crazy canuck]

You'll get used to it. 

PRC, if you do you are doing something wrong. 

I meant you'll get used to feeling guilty.  Not that you wouldn't feel guilt.

Ah ok.  My apologies

[Barrister]

I few more anecdotes posted for my own edification...


Timmy is using grandmas (my mom's) iPad to play a toddler game she has installed.  Somehow, and we don't know quite how, he starts playing some music that's on the iPad.  Some CCR / John Fogarty (I didn't know my mom was a fan).  Timmy starts dancing to it.  He convinces me and my wife to dance with him too.  Andrew also gets into the act. 

I never knew dancing to 'Centerfield' at 10am Saturday morning in our pajamas could be so much fun.


Today (Sunday) I go out to try and clean up the garage so we can park our vehicles in it for the rapidly approaching winter.  But Timmy wants to come out with me, so not so much gets accomplished.  Instead, we play a few different games, including hockey.

I bought a full-size wooden stick last year.  Timmy has a little plastic mini-stick with Lightening McQueen from Pixar's Cars on it.  We've played hockey before, just using a little plastic ball.  But today he asks me about the tape on my stick.  I reply that it's hockey tape.  Timmy then insists that I put hockey tape on his Lightening McQueen hockey stick, which of course I do.


After playing hockey, we go to Home Depot.  Time is enthralled when we hear the forklift, so we go and watch it load a pallet of flooring into the back of someone's truck.  But once we get into our own true, he tells me that he's ready for a nap (this in itself is remarkable).  But we try and stretch him out to get a few things for supper at the grocery store.  And at first he's fine - we find the one special grocery cart that's part fire-truck at the front for him to ride in.  So he's happy as we get our groceries.

But as we stand in the checkout, Timmy gets out and wants to push the cart.  Fine, fine - but we have to wait until we pay for the groceries.  He's okay with that.

Once we pay for the groceries though, we let Timmy push the cart.  He promptly runs into everything in sight.  We just try and help him 'steer' - and he looses it.  "I just want to push the cart!" "No I don't want any helping!"  I end up having to carry a screaming 3 year old out of the grocery store and into the truck.  In it he still screams all the way home, at which time I carry him into his bed and he promptly goes for a nap.

[Grey Fox]

Yep, being tired sucks.

[merithyn]

He did warn you. It's not his fault you ignored him.

[CountDeMoney]

Yeah, man.  Just from watching my nieces, miss the nap launch window at your own peril.

[Ed Anger]

That is why I keep a bottle of Jack Daniels in the car.

[PDH]

That is why I keep a bottle of Jack Daniels in the car.

I rub a little on my gums and the kids don't bother me anymore.

[Ed Anger]

That is why I keep a bottle of Jack Daniels in the car.

I rub a little on my gums and the kids don't bother me anymore.

[CountDeMoney]

That is why I keep a bottle of Jack Daniels in the car.

Hitting them with your flip flop instead probably wouldn't leave as many bruises, though.

[Ed Anger]

Too ethnic.