News:

And we're back!

Main Menu

The Valve New Employee Handbook

Started by Syt, April 22, 2012, 03:27:10 PM

Previous topic - Next topic
Print
Go Down Pages1
User actions

Syt

April 22, 2012, 03:27:10 PM
I am, somehow, less interested in the weight and convolutions of Einstein's brain than in the near certainty that people of equal talent have lived and died in cotton fields and sweatshops.
—Stephen Jay Gould

Proud owner of 42 Zoupa Points.

Ed Anger

#1
April 22, 2012, 03:32:04 PM
They left out the provision that employees must purchase 50 dollars of hats every quarter in team Fortress 2.
Stay Alive...Let the Man Drive

Razgovory

#2
April 22, 2012, 04:07:27 PM
Maybe if they had a more traditional structure, half life 2 episode 3 would be out by now.  Ah well,  I swear by Steam.  Great program.  I buy games cheap, don't have to keep track of CDs.  This makes Raz Happy.
I've given it serious thought. I must scorn the ways of my family, and seek a Japanese woman to yield me my progeny. He shall live in the lands of the east, and be well tutored in his sacred trust to weave the best traditions of Japan and the Sacred South together, until such time as he (or, indeed his house, which will periodically require infusion of both Southern and Japanese bloodlines of note) can deliver to the South it's independence, either in this world or in space.  -Lettow April of 2011

Raz is right. -MadImmortalMan March of 2017

grumbler

#3
April 22, 2012, 06:29:45 PM
QuoteValve has an incredibly unique way of doing things...
:lmfao:
The future is all around us, waiting, in moments of transition, to be born in moments of revelation. No one knows the shape of that future or where it will take us. We know only that it is always born in pain.   -G'Kar

Bayraktar!

Habbaku

#4
April 22, 2012, 06:47:26 PM
:unsure:
The medievals were only too right in taking nolo episcopari as the best reason a man could give to others for making him a bishop. Give me a king whose chief interest in life is stamps, railways, or race-horses; and who has the power to sack his Vizier (or whatever you care to call him) if he does not like the cut of his trousers.

Government is an abstract noun meaning the art and process of governing and it should be an offence to write it with a capital G or so as to refer to people.
-J. R. R. Tolkien

Jaron

#5
April 22, 2012, 06:49:02 PM
Quote from: grumbler on April 22, 2012, 06:29:45 PM
QuoteValve has an incredibly unique way of doing things...
:lmfao:

Someone spotted the elephant in the room! :lol:
Winner of THE grumbler point.

Grey Fox

#6
April 22, 2012, 06:51:46 PM
Man, I couldn't work there. I would just do nothing all day.
Colonel Caliga is Awesome.

PDH

#7
April 22, 2012, 08:36:45 PM
Jaron, it is good to have you back.
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
-Umberto Eco

-------
"I'm pretty sure my level of depression has nothing to do with how much of a fucking asshole you are."

-CdM

Jaron

#8
April 22, 2012, 08:45:52 PM
Thank you PDH. It is good to be back in your internet.
Winner of THE grumbler point.

PDH

#9
April 22, 2012, 08:49:36 PM
My internet only goes to the Wyoming border, from there on it is Mormon-run.
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
-Umberto Eco

-------
"I'm pretty sure my level of depression has nothing to do with how much of a fucking asshole you are."

-CdM

Jaron

#10
April 22, 2012, 08:52:34 PM
Hey, I have the option to become Mormon. These people line up to baptize me like they have a secret punch card they can redeem for prizes once I make the plunge.
Winner of THE grumbler point.

PDH

#11
April 22, 2012, 09:00:48 PM
Wyoming joke

Q - Why do you always take 2 Mormons with you when you go fishing?

A - Because if you only take one he will drink all your beer.
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
-Umberto Eco

-------
"I'm pretty sure my level of depression has nothing to do with how much of a fucking asshole you are."

-CdM

Jaron

#12
April 22, 2012, 09:26:15 PM
Heeheehee. It's funny because it is true.
Winner of THE grumbler point.

CountDeMoney

#13
April 22, 2012, 10:11:45 PM
It's employee handbooks like that that make me hate Corporate America(tm) even more.
Print
Go Up Pages1
User actions