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How Not to Attract Tourists

Started by Baron von Schtinkenbutt, March 16, 2012, 07:41:06 AM

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Jacob

Quote from: CountDeMoney on March 16, 2012, 09:10:47 AM
Problem is, they come here, and they fucking stay.  And I'm up to my balls here in Russian cyber scam artists, Jamaican grass dealers, Chinese counterfeiters, Honduran car thieves, Nigerian stolen credit card rings and Korean dry cleaners that rip you off by not using the starch they charge you for.

Like I said before, the great thing about being an American is you don't have to see the world;  the world comes here and starts crime syndicates. 

Fuck them all.  I hope TSA puts their filthy 3rd world asses through the fucking gauntlet.

:lol:

You're such a putz sometimes.

crazy canuck

Quote from: Valmy on March 16, 2012, 09:51:49 AM
Quote from: crazy canuck on March 16, 2012, 09:42:57 AM
They learn that Americans watch it.

Fox News reports on its own ratings?  How unprofessional.

Let me connect the dots for you.  While most Americans are friendly warm and welcoming in their own country when they travel they often transform in the kind of person often seen on Fox news.  From an outsiders point of view therefore, Fox News and American tourists are self referencing reinforcers of the negative stereotype of the ugly American.

As an added bonus the latest GOP race also helps.

Valmy

Quote from: Malthus on March 16, 2012, 09:56:53 AM
By his own account, he's not a Canadian. He's Québécois. So we Canadians are off the hook.  :D

Yeah because Lettow always wraps himself in the American Flag.
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Valmy

Quote from: crazy canuck on March 16, 2012, 09:58:10 AM
While most Americans are friendly warm and welcoming in their own country when they travel they often transform in the kind of person often seen on Fox news.

Fat people? :P
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Eddie Teach

Quote from: Valmy on March 16, 2012, 10:01:26 AM
Yeah because Lettow always wraps himself in the American Flag.

Maybe if he was burning it. :shifty:
To sleep, perchance to dream. But in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?

Josquius

I wonder what would happen if someone actually did click those "Yes, I am a terrorist" boxes.
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CountDeMoney

Quote from: Malthus on March 16, 2012, 09:46:02 AM
For the US, of course, that would be Lettow.  :)

Sure, if the US were 1850's Georgia.

Eddie Teach

To sleep, perchance to dream. But in that sleep of death, what dreams may come?

garbon

Quote from: Baron von Schtinkenbutt on March 16, 2012, 07:41:06 AM
QuoteHow Not to Attract Tourists
AS Americans, we like to imagine our country as we think of ourselves: open-hearted and welcoming; efficient and practical; easygoing, above all. These values are the foundation of our culture, of an open economy fueled by ideas and immigration, and of our soft power — America's ability to change the world simply because it is admired.

Whatever foreigners think of the American experiment, though, it's unlikely the experience of crossing our border has made them think better of it.

This op-ed seems to share a number of the same opinions as a number of the Euros here.

I guess there's a reason you didn't post the rest of the op-ed. That form sounds like a nuisance but minor in the extreme.  I thought this was going to be something about bizarre hoops.  Besides we aren't the only country to ask for customs forms, which is an additional complaint in the article.
"I've never been quite sure what the point of a eunuch is, if truth be told. It seems to me they're only men with the useful bits cut off."
I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim.

garbon

Quote from: Malthus on March 16, 2012, 09:56:53 AM
Quote from: Valmy on March 16, 2012, 09:50:39 AM
Quote from: Malthus on March 16, 2012, 09:46:02 AM
For the US, of course, that would be Lettow.  :)

Well I presume all Canadians are like Grallon so that's fair.

By his own account, he's not a Canadian. He's Québécois. So we Canadians are off the hook.  :D

Then we're off the hook for Lettow who claims CSA citizenship.
"I've never been quite sure what the point of a eunuch is, if truth be told. It seems to me they're only men with the useful bits cut off."
I drank because I wanted to drown my sorrows, but now the damned things have learned to swim.

CountDeMoney

Quote from: Jacob on March 16, 2012, 09:57:51 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on March 16, 2012, 09:10:47 AM
Problem is, they come here, and they fucking stay.  And I'm up to my balls here in Russian cyber scam artists, Jamaican grass dealers, Chinese counterfeiters, Honduran car thieves, Nigerian stolen credit card rings and Korean dry cleaners that rip you off by not using the starch they charge you for.

Like I said before, the great thing about being an American is you don't have to see the world;  the world comes here and starts crime syndicates. 

Fuck them all.  I hope TSA puts their filthy 3rd world asses through the fucking gauntlet.

:lol:

You're such a putz sometimes.

I'm sure up there in your idyllic sylvan paradise of Disney's Canada, everybody with an accent shows up chock full of heady immigrant goodness, ready to become active participants in the Canadian Dream(tm) as  animated woodland creatures help them get dressed and work on their cobbling and other humble occupations, but down here--particularly in the Northeast Corridor--a substantial amount of immigrants are up to no goddamned good.

Valmy

I seem to recall Britain being quite a pain to get through customs compared to other Euro countries which just sorta wave you through with a yawn.  In Italy if they realized you were American they would not even check your passport.

It was pretty comical seeing a long line of backpackers being asked in robot fashion 'what is your business here in Britain'.

Um to get drunk and hit on your women dude.
Quote"This is a Russian warship. I propose you lay down arms and surrender to avoid bloodshed & unnecessary victims. Otherwise, you'll be bombed."

Zmiinyi defenders: "Russian warship, go fuck yourself."

Malthus

Quote from: Valmy on March 16, 2012, 10:01:26 AM
Quote from: Malthus on March 16, 2012, 09:56:53 AM
By his own account, he's not a Canadian. He's Québécois. So we Canadians are off the hook.  :D

Yeah because Lettow always wraps himself in the American Flag.

Listen, I don't wanna know *what* he does while wanking.
The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane—Marcus Aurelius

Josquius

Quote from: Valmy on March 16, 2012, 10:14:29 AM
I seem to recall Britain being quite a pain to get through customs compared to other Euro countries which just sorta wave you through with a yawn.  In Italy if they realized you were American they would not even check your passport.

It was pretty comical seeing a long line of backpackers being asked in robot fashion 'what is your business here in Britain'.

Um to get drunk and hit on your women dude.
You can hardly blame Brits at being suspicious of people claiming to be tourists.
Tourist? Coming TO Britain?

:P
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Sheilbh

Quote from: garbon on March 16, 2012, 10:11:02 AM
I guess there's a reason you didn't post the rest of the op-ed. That form sounds like a nuisance but minor in the extreme.  I thought this was going to be something about bizarre hoops.  Besides we aren't the only country to ask for customs forms, which is an additional complaint in the article.
I think you're the only country to charge for it though.  When I visited the US it was a form you filled out on-board, it was free, it was shorter than that form and it looked a lot less of a bureaucratic hassle than this:
https://esta.cbp.dhs.gov/esta/
When you add that to the proverbial delight of dealing with TSA staff it's just not a terribly pleasant place to travel to.

What I find extraordinary is that, from what I hear, Israeli security and screening which is far greater (and probably more effective than anywhere else in the world) is actually quite pleasant and well handled.
Let's bomb Russia!