Ayn Rand reviews Children's movies

[Ed Anger]

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/daily-shouts/ayn-rand-reviews-childrens-movies

A sampling:

"Lady and the Tramp"

A ridiculous movie. What could a restaurant owner possibly have to gain by giving away a perfectly good meal to dogs, when he could sell it at a reasonable price to human beings? A dog cannot pay for spaghetti, and payment is the only honest way to express appreciation for value. —One star.

"Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory"

An excellent movie. The obviously unfit individuals are winnowed out through a series of entrepreneurial tests and, in the end, an enterprising young boy receives a factory. I believe more movies should be made about enterprising young boys who are given factories. —Three and a half stars. (Half a star off for the grandparents, who are sponging off the labor of Charlie and his mother. If Grandpa Joe can dance, Grandpa Joe can work.)

"Frozen"

An exceptional woman foolishly allows her mooching family members to keep her from ruling a kingdom of ice in perfect solitude. She is forced to use her unique powers to provide free entertainment for peasants, without compensation. I liked the snowman, when he sang. —One star.

[11B4V]

"Old Yeller"

A farm animal ceases to be useful and is disposed of humanely. A valuable lesson for children. —Four stars.

[Ed Anger]

Seedy will enjoy the pro-cat focus in some reviews.

[11B4V]

If Grandpa Joe can dance, Grandpa Joe can work.

Also, there are no trains in this movie. I did like the talking clock, who attempted to take pride in his work despite constant attacks on his dignity by the candlestick. The candlestick did not take his job seriously.

[Norgy]

Just  . This goes on Facebook.
Ed, I know I've said it before, but I love you.

[Ed Anger]

 

[CountDeMoney]

If Grandpa Joe can dance, Grandpa Joe can work.

[Ideologue]

I can't dance.

[Siege]

Didn't Ayn Rand die decades ago?
I'm pretty sure she couldn't have watched Frozen.

[DontSayBanana]

Didn't Ayn Rand die decades ago?
I'm pretty sure she couldn't have watched Frozen.

You spelled too many words correctly.  You clearly haven't had enough Miller Lite this evening.  One and a half stars.

[Grinning_Colossus]

Didn't Ayn Rand die decades ago?
I'm pretty sure she couldn't have watched Frozen.

Ayn's contacts in Galt's Gulch naturally invented the Singularity long before we collectivists did, and she uploaded her brain to a machine that is now writing for The New Yorker.

[Josquius]

Frozen... Someday I must watch the whole thing. I guess if I mute the songs (half the freaking film) it won't be so bad..

[Norgy]

If Grandpa Joe can dance, Grandpa Joe can work.

Best line in the whole piece. 

[jimmy olsen]

Frozen... Someday I must watch the whole thing. I guess if I mute the songs (half the freaking film) it won't be so bad..

If you don't like the songs there's no point in watching it. The songs are what make or break a Disney film.

[The Brain]

I can't wait for the new Star Wars movies.