Porn induced erectile dysfunction

[Ideologue]

Yeah, I'd say like 50%.  I count that as normal DS.

50% of chicks like to be choked?

Do you mean, a hand placed near the throat or do you mean actually restricting airflow?

Pressures on arteries.  I've never met anyone who likes their trachea manipulated.  (Also, it was a little joke, given as it is based on a sample of women who wanted to have sex with me. )

[Jacob]

I saw a show that interviewed teens about porn (it was BBC 3, I was waiting for Stacey Dooley ) and I didn't think it was normal that all the girls were saying how much the guys wanted to cum on their face. I think that's a result of porn. If the girls wants to do it fine, but I don't think (and the girls didn't) think it should be seen as normal vanilla sex.

Having said that maybe that's how heterosexuals have always courted?

No.

Facials are from porn - they're the way that they can show it's for real. Ejaculating on the face is the most intimate way to *show* ejaculation because the face is very personal; and showing some guy ejaculating inside a women is not visually stimulating.

That it has become a standard is very much evidence of the influence of porn IMO.

It also adds a humilation-D/S factor to the situation.

[CountDeMoney]

I remember reading a (stridently feminist) analysis of pornography in which the prevalence and popularity of oral sex in porn (particularly facials, swallowing, and the portrayal by actresses of a wanton desire to perform fellatio comparable to hunger) is due to a subconscious male desire to make up for the inability to breastfeed, and that oral sex and the subsequent "feeding" of semen is to compensate that.

While a compelling argument, personally I think it's due to the very conscious male desire to just see his penis in a woman's mouth.  Sometimes a blowjob is just a blowjob.

[MadImmortalMan]

I've dated women who won't do blowjobs. And also some who desperately wanted to do them. That analysis does not explain it.

[Ideologue]

If I'd had regular access to porn at that age, it's possible I wouldn't be as fucked up as I am.  Certainly, if I'd had regular sex in high school, I'd be president by now.  And I'm only 32.  That's the difference it would have made.

I think this is another example of how porn fucks people up. Lots and lots of people don't have sex in high school.

Well, lots and lots of people ain't me.  You know me.  You know it's a valid thesis.

We could just say "if I'd had a girlfriend."  But, no, I wouldn't have gotten any true validation.  I had a girlfriend at age 18 for half a year and we didn't have sex (excepting one--one--handjob).  I can't really count that as a romantic relationship, can I?  Which means I was never loved until Korea came along when I was 23 and my brain had mostly taken its final form.  It's also probably why I fucked that up so badly.

[Jacob]

Well, lots and lots of people ain't me.  You know me.  You know it's a valid thesis.

We could just say "if I'd had a girlfriend."  But, no, I wouldn't have gotten any true validation.  I had a girlfriend at age 18 for half a year and we didn't have sex (excepting one--one--handjob).  I can't really count that as a romantic relationship, can I?  Which means I was never loved until Korea came along when I was 23 and my brain had mostly taken its final form.  It's also probably why I fucked that up so badly.

Age 23 is not particularly uncommon for "first proper relationship" and/or sex, I don't think. I mean, it sure feels like it when you're 16 and want to get laid and it takes another seven years, but there's a lot of things to figure out. And, of course, most people who are older than 16 will front to most of their peers.

[Ideologue]

But unless you haven't looked into it--and there's no reason for you to have, I guess--the vast, vast majority of porn is regular old sex jazzed up with a cinematic presentation.  Or at least the same kind of sex I've had with pretty much every partner I've ever had.  (Only one had an objection to facials, but did swallow.)

I think your liking of facials are a good indication of how porn has influenced sex, since they're pretty much the definition of an porn-like act performed for the camera. That you have developed such an attachment to that act is, I'd wager, down to your consumption of porn.

Now, I'm not saying it's particularly unhealthy, but it's a good illustration of how that influences how people approach sex.

I don't think that it's beyond the pale to assume that other acts and the general attitudes shown in porn also influences attitudes, especially in young people (and I believe a few people in this thread have said studies support that assumption).

Also, I think your assertion that most porn is "just two people fucking" is a little blithe - you've got all kinds of racial fetishization, all kinds of dominance and submission, all kinds of humiliation porn, all kinds of class and race conflicts, hints at inappropriate ages etc etc.

It's not that any given one of those types of porn are inherently "bad" - what consenting adults get off to is their business, as are their fantasies - but the aggregate of all this stuff nonetheless creates the illusion that there are all these hot chicks out there just gagging for your cock exactly the way that gets you off.

I wouldn't be surprised if the rise of the MRA, incels, red pill, PUA and other assorted masculinist losers is at least partially down to the prevalence of porn - their view of women and sex seems pretty consistent with the way they're depicted in porn these days at least.

Jake, I think these are all or mostly all good points, and would like to discuss them further.  Don't think I have time right now.

One minor counterpoint: sometimes ejaculating in a woman's (or, I suppose, a man's) mouth isn't entirely pleasurable.  It can give that overstimulated feeling.  And I would be SHOCKED to find out facials did not exist prior to the film medium.

Oh, and fyi I'm more into creampies these days.

[MadImmortalMan]

The girls seem to expect what they see in the porn nowadays. Dunno if that's good or bad. But it might be fun.

[CountDeMoney]

I've dated women who won't do blowjobs. And also some who desperately wanted to do them. That analysis does not explain it.

That's why meta analysis of sexual practices and affinities are practically useless:  everyone's wired differently.  And women are just as wired differently as men.  Just so happens that sometimes their buttons are harder to find and push than others.

[CountDeMoney]

Oh, and fyi I'm more into creampies these days.

[Jacob]

And I would be SHOCKED to find out facials did not exist prior to the film medium.

I'm sure they existed, but I'm pretty confident they were not considered "normal" acts. If they are now, that's an example of the normative influence of porn.

... and it's a bit of a pity, really, because if facials are "everyday vanilla sex" that takes away the transgressive frisson.

As an aside: I'd think that if you're really into performing facials on your girl and she's not super keen, you're going to get further with "yeah, I know it's kinda dirty, but it really does it for me; tell me what gets you off, and I'll do that too; let's push boundaries together" than "it's a normal thing and I'm going to imply that there's something wrong with you if you don't let me do it, even if you don't care for it."

[Ideologue]

Well, lots and lots of people ain't me.  You know me.  You know it's a valid thesis.

We could just say "if I'd had a girlfriend."  But, no, I wouldn't have gotten any true validation.  I had a girlfriend at age 18 for half a year and we didn't have sex (excepting one--one--handjob).  I can't really count that as a romantic relationship, can I?  Which means I was never loved until Korea came along when I was 23 and my brain had mostly taken its final form.  It's also probably why I fucked that up so badly.

Age 23 is not particularly uncommon for "first proper relationship" and/or sex, I don't think. I mean, it sure feels like it when you're 16 and want to get laid and it takes another seven years, but there's a lot of things to figure out. And, of course, most people who are older than 16 will front to most of their peers.

Well, it took me till about age 30 to learn how to lie to people in order to bolster my status and increase my own standing, confidence and chances of success, and I'm still bad at it, because I think it's evil.

MIM: no oral sex = dealbreaker.  I like giving it too much to go through a whole relationship feeling exploited.

[CountDeMoney]

"yeah, I know it's kinda dirty, but it really does it for me; tell me what gets you off, and I'll do that too; let's push boundaries together"

Oh, Jake.

[sbr]

 

[Ideologue]

And I would be SHOCKED to find out facials did not exist prior to the film medium.

I'm sure they existed, but I'm pretty confident they were not considered "normal" acts. If they are now, that's an example of the normative influence of porn.

... and it's a bit of a pity, really, because if facials are "everyday vanilla sex" that takes away the transgressive frisson.

As an aside: I'd think that if you're really into performing facials on your girl and she's not super keen, you're going to get further with "yeah, I know it's kinda dirty, but it really does it for me; tell me what gets you off, and I'll do that too; let's push boundaries together" than "it's a normal thing and I'm going to imply that there's something wrong with you if you don't let me do it, even if you don't care for it."

Remember Africa?  Didn't like facials.  Didn't care.  Maybe you meant the general you?

I can live without facials.

I couldn't live with someone so disgusted by semen that they wouldn't take it anywhere.  It's unromantic, awkward, and arguably even rude.  They might as well join a nunnery.  Or the priesthood, I guess.  But is it "wrong"?  "Wrong" implies a moral judgment.  Being dissatisfied with someone's sexual acumen is not, strictly speaking, a moral judgment.