Family Matters?

[Malthus]

I'm not so happy about my brother's constant 'encouragement' to come visit his house in Iowa. Which is like two days away by car, and not near any air transport. Where, as far as I know, there is nothing to do but hang out with him, his wife, and their two hyperactive daughters ...

You should fly to Chicago, make him come meet you there, spend a day or two hanging out in Chi, then go back to Iowa with him for a few days, and make him drive you back to O'Hare when you leave.  After all, if he wants you to visit so much, I'm sure he won't mind...

We met up in Chicago last summer, had a great time there. 

The problem with having him drive us from Des Moines or Chicago is that, if we stay for any length of time, not having a car seriously limits our mobility ... he lives in the middle of suburban nowhere. There is literally nothing to do within walking distance, but hang out in his house. Hanging out with his kids is okay as long as they are distracted, but half an hour of them is about all I can stand otherwise ... and I usually like kids. His are 'difficult'.

The thought of being trapped in his house for days with his kids gives me the shudders. 

I could I suppose rent a car, but even so, the attractions near his house are pretty limited. But at least that way I could get out of it.

[derspiess]

My family is close and we all enjoy being together.  My oldest brother seems to get a bout of higher conflict syndrome every now & then but otherwise we get along great.  We're a bit boring compared to my wife's family, but hey, we're WASPs.

[Capetan Mihali]

higher conflict syndrome

What's that mean?

[mongers]

higher conflict syndrome

What's that mean?

He's three inches shorter than derspiess.

[Capetan Mihali]

I could I suppose rent a car, but even so, the attractions near his house are pretty limited. But at least that way I could get out of it.

Yeah, that's a must.  You could even come up with daytrips within 2-3 hours drive to ensure that you're out and about.  Or maybe time it with the state fair to really soak up the Middle Americana?  I recall the Iowa State Fair introducing a lot of those gimmicky, 11000-calorie fair foods.   Or just drive to Iowa City every day to drink boilermakers and sing karaoke with Adm. Yi.

[Barrister]

I'm not so happy about my brother's constant 'encouragement' to come visit his house in Iowa. Which is like two days away by car, and not near any air transport. Where, as far as I know, there is nothing to do but hang out with him, his wife, and their two hyperactive daughters ...

You should fly to Chicago, make him come meet you there, spend a day or two hanging out in Chi, then go back to Iowa with him for a few days, and make him drive you back to O'Hare when you leave.  After all, if he wants you to visit so much, I'm sure he won't mind...

We met up in Chicago last summer, had a great time there. 

The problem with having him drive us from Des Moines or Chicago is that, if we stay for any length of time, not having a car seriously limits our mobility ... he lives in the middle of suburban nowhere. There is literally nothing to do within walking distance, but hang out in his house. Hanging out with his kids is okay as long as they are distracted, but half an hour of them is about all I can stand otherwise ... and I usually like kids. His are 'difficult'.

The thought of being trapped in his house for days with his kids gives me the shudders. 

I could I suppose rent a car, but even so, the attractions near his house are pretty limited. But at least that way I could get out of it.

Sounded like our trip to Brazil.  There we are in Brazil - but in the middle of latin-american suburban nowhere.  A couple of times we pestered and got rides to the beach, but we also spent several days just sitting around the house.

I think it's probably important to spend time with your brother M, but I would second the idea of renting a car.  It doesn't have to be anything important you're seeing, just as long as it's an excuse to get out of the house.

I think I'm pretty close with my family.  A lot of you guys are talking about extended family - aunts, uncles and cousins.  I very rarely see them these days.  But my brother and my parents - compared to when we lived in Yukon, we see them multiple times per year.  It's kind of nice.

[Iormlund]

My brother moved far away when he finished uni. I might get to see him sporadically if I can successfully trick my new employers into sending me to Germany, since he lives in Berlin now. The rest I see regularly.

[Capetan Mihali]

I could I suppose rent a car, but even so, the attractions near his house are pretty limited. But at least that way I could get out of it.

Yeah, that's a must.  You could even come up with daytrips within 2-3 hours drive to ensure that you're out and about.  Or maybe time it with the state fair to really soak up the Middle Americana?  I recall the Iowa State Fair introducing a lot of those gimmicky, 11000-calorie fair foods.   Or just drive to Iowa City every day to drink boilermakers and sing karaoke with Adm. Yi.

Actually, I would definitely go in August and time it with the fair.  It's held in Des Moines over 11 days, and I bet Carl would enjoy it if you were brave enough to bring him along.

Otherwise, from where I recall your brother teaching, it looks like Omaha is about 2.5 hours away, and must have some decent museums.  And I know they have had a little bit of an "urban revival" there in the last 10-15 years.  It's <2 hours to Iowa City, which is supposed to be a decently interesting university town.  I don't know what the nature scene in Iowa is like; obviously it's flat and not incredibly wooded, but I bet going to a quiet lake on a hot summer day would be nice.

[derspiess]

higher conflict syndrome

What's that mean?

Might not have gotten the term right-- it's when someone has a great tendency to blow a minor issue out of proportion, act as if they are a martyr, and spend more time fighting over the issue than it's worth.

[Malthus]

higher conflict syndrome

What's that mean?

Might not have gotten the term right-- it's when someone has a great tendency to blow a minor issue out of proportion, act as if they are a martyr, and spend more time fighting over the issue than it's worth.

Heh, my wife's sister is like that, to an absurd degree.

Her kids allegedly get smaller scoops of ice-cream than their cousins at the store, and it's a major event - two years later. Not only is this injustice allegedly world-shaking, in fact the most unfair thing ever, it is also symbolic of the injustice she has suffered from her whole life, in which she has always gotten the short end of the stick (actual incident! and the sad part is - the scoops were the same size). 

[crazy canuck]

Growing up I had a close extended family.  But so many of the people that made up that group have now died that it is not the same at all.  The experience for my boys is quite different.  All my grandparents were present at my wedding but both of their Grandmothers died when they were young.  It is hard to replace that loss.

[garbon]

My family is still pretty close (well when the various members are speaking to one another ) though that's really now become reduced to my immediate family and the families of two of my mother's siblings. I think in large part that's driven by my mother and aunt and I wonder apart from a couple of us, how close things will still be in the future.

Of course, the situation is a bit different for apart from my one cousin none of the kids in my generation (in that group of 3 families) have any children.

[Valmy]

Of course, the situation is a bit different for apart from my one cousin none of the kids in my generation (in that group of 3 families) have any children.

You guys are still pretty young though right?

[garbon]

Of course, the situation is a bit different for apart from my one cousin none of the kids in my generation (in that group of 3 families) have any children.

You guys are still pretty young though right?

We range from about 20 to 33, so certainly there is time. One factor I didn't mention though is that few of us (and I don't count myself in that) have had any serious long-term relationships.

Very different from my father's side of the family where my grandfather was also someones great great grandfather before he died in his 70s.

[Malthus]

Of course, the situation is a bit different for apart from my one cousin none of the kids in my generation (in that group of 3 families) have any children.

You guys are still pretty young though right?

Yeah garbon, better get cracking on that ASAP.