Looking for advice about a friend

[Martinus]

So, I have this friend, who is in his mid-forties, single (gay). He lost his job over 2 years ago, and he has been unable to get one since (he has been mainly living off mainly stuff he got from his retired mother but this has now dried up as his brother and sister-in-law found out and convinced his mother to stop it). I don't think he has been very diligent in looking for a job (e.g. he is a Slavist literature graduate and knows Russian pretty well, so I tried to set him up with one of my exes who does pretty well giving private language lessons to students - he never even called him). He also has a bit of a drinking problem and has once borrowed some money from me but did not repay (it wasn't a huge amount so I did not bother him about it).

Now, as you know I have just moved to a new flat and I am even wondering whether I should bother renting out the old flat as it would be too much hassle for not that much gain, and I would have renovate it anyway, and planning for my mum to move there in autumn anyway etc. So now he is being kicked out of his flat because he cant pay the rent and asked if he can stay at my old flat for a couple of months. He didnt offer to pay.

He is a good friend of mine, as we meet weekly or bi-weekly with other people to chat and drink wine, so I would miss him as a friend if he was gone from my life. But I'm kinda afraid I may be getting into a tricky situation with him in future if he is unable to move out in a couple of months.

Advice?

[Zanza]

Help him in any way you can, but don't let him move into that flat. At least not if your tenancy laws are similar to ours. That would just postpone an inevitable conflict with him and probably make it much more bitter.

[Josquius]

Make it super clear to him that he's on a count down to a set date when your mother moves in. Occasionally move some of her stuff into the flat whilst he's there to make sure he gets the message.

[The Brain]

Whoa. Hope you find a job soon!

[Martinus]

Whoa. Hope you find a job soon!

[Martinus]

Help him in any way you can, but don't let him move into that flat. At least not if your tenancy laws are similar to ours. That would just postpone an inevitable conflict with him and probably make it much more bitter.

Well I wouldnt formally rent it out to him so while our tenancy laws are crazy he would have no legal standing if I changed locks some day and put his things out.

[MadImmortalMan]

Rent out the flat but not to him.

he is a Slavist literature graduate

Wow useful. 

[The Brain]

Can't you reevaluate your friendship? Solve a lot of problems.

[MadBurgerMaker]

I dunno.  You might just be postponing the "drama" until the Autumn if you let him stay at your old place until your mom moves in.  I guess if it's a couple of months, and you know he'll be out of there when he says, it's all good, but I....well I'd just say "my mom is moving in" there, "sorry buddy."

[garbon]

Help him in any way you can, but don't let him move into that flat. At least not if your tenancy laws are similar to ours. That would just postpone an inevitable conflict with him and probably make it much more bitter.

Yeah I'd worry about tenant laws.

[The Brain]

Remember that if you take him in you have to take responsibility for feeding him, walking him, washing him etc. Could be a good experience though that will prepare you for adult life.

[Legbiter]

Think I'd rather give him 2 months' worth of rent money than let him move in. You know he's just going to loaf for the next 2 months and then ask for more time and repeat until you forcibly kick him out.

[CountDeMoney]

(he has been mainly living off mainly stuff he got from his retired mother but this has now dried up as his brother and sister-in-law found out and convinced his mother to stop it).

Nice family.  Way to help out, even if he is a drunk.
I agree with Legbiter;  cash is easier to get rid of than a bad tenant.  Don't let him in.

The next phone number you give him should be for AA.  He needs that kind of help more than anything.

[CountDeMoney]

he is a Slavist literature graduate

Wow useful. 

Somebody over there must do something with it.

[Phillip V]

A good friend is someone who will sacrifice their life for you and do the work to provide food and shelter, not meet weekly or bi-weekly with other people to chat and drink wine.

Cut this anchor out of your life. If he is a leech to his own family, what do you think he is or will be to you?