Barrister's obnoxious thread full of smug parenting stories

[AnchorClanker]

Exactly. 

[CountDeMoney]

I prefer being an uncle as well.  Crazy Uncle Jay Jay lets us stay up late and watch age-inappropriate TV when he babysits, yay!

I'll write my nieces letters now and then, they get a charge over getting their own mail.  Makes them feel big.

[Ed Anger]

I used to feed my nephews candy right before my bro would pick his kids up. ENJOY THE SUGAR RUSH.

[Syt]

We're at 19 weeks.  Due date is October 8th.

I like that date. 

[Valmy]

Ok so I bought David a plastic tee ball set for Christmas just so we had another thing to play with outside.  Every once in a while we go and hit a few plastic balls around the yard and David generally likes just being able to swing a bat around and generally gets more tee than ball.  But today we went out and he was just crushing (for a 2.5 year old anyway) line drives all over the yard.  After each hit he would raise his hands and exclaim 'I'm a baseball player!'

I think I had a dadgasm.

[derspiess]

  Good stuff. 

Once Tommy settled in as a left-handed batter he's been hitting pretty consistently.  He kept switching up his throwing and batting, but it looks like he throws right and bats left. 

[Grey Fox]

My daughter turned 2 today!

Incidently, BB's oldest turned 3.

HBs all around.

[Barrister]

My daughter turned 2 today!

Incidently, BB's oldest turned 3.

HBs all around.

[katmai]

Damn Breeders

[Barrister]

Damn Breeders

Whatever, Marti.

[katmai]

I don't have to be gay to hate you damn people overpopulating the world!

[Barrister]

I don't have to be gay to hate you damn people overpopulating the world!

Canada has negative population growth (until you factor in immigration).  I'm just doing my part.

[katmai]

Uke halfbreeds aren't an improvement...

[Barrister]

Uke halfbreeds aren't an improvement...

True they aren't Ukrainian true-bloods...

[Barrister]

Timmy decided we had to go see the wild animals the other day.  So he put two chairs together so we could go on the "train".  We sat down on the chairs, made some train sounds, and we were at the jungle.  So then Timmy would take me around to different corners of the house.  We'd go into the kitchen, he'd point at the cupboards and he say "Look!  It's a MONKEY!!!" (emphasis in the original).

My favourites were the giraffe that was hiding behind the bedroom door, and the hippopotamus that was under the kitchen table.



That same day we were in the basement.  I was giving him horsey rides, getting on all fours and he'd ride on my back.  But horsey rides weren't interesting enough I guess, because soon I was a buffalo instead, giving buffalo rides.  My name was Daddy Buffalo, as in "go here Daddy Buffalo".  Timmy would ride to different corners of the basement, where he'd then tell me to stop because he had to go to a store.  We made stops at the Chair Store and the Food Store, for example.  Then he's tell me to take a rest and go to sleep - but only because 30 seconds later he'd yell out "Cock a Doodle Doo!!!" and we'd be back at it again.



And I have no idea if anyone is interested in these stories or not - I'm mostly posting them here for my own benefit.  I like opening this thread and going over past anecdotes.