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General Category => Off the Record => Topic started by: Viking on April 13, 2011, 01:45:55 PM

Title: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Viking on April 13, 2011, 01:45:55 PM
http://www.dagbladet.no/2011/04/13/nyheter/garden/innenriks/16176263/

I would laugh, but I must cry.

As part of the end of the tour of the present guard the guard staff decided to launch a surprise armed alert to demonstrate the Guards state of alert. These alerts are there to mobilize the guard in case of an emergency or attack on the Royal Palace.

So, they sounded the surprise alarm expecting all the guard to form up as they had practiced before. Now, enough Guardists turned out to to man all alarm stations, but a substantial number did not assemble and were found hiding in the toilets and under their beds as well as a few fleeing from the base barracks itself by fleeing over the outer fence.

This is so fucking embarrassing for the Norwegian Army. The members of the guard volunteer and compete for guard duty, but yet the guard seems to have no esprit de corps.

Something is rotten in the state of Norway. The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Habbaku on April 13, 2011, 01:54:01 PM
This reminds me of the Sharpe movie in which Sharpe gets to deal with the Spanish royal guard...

Are those that were caught fleeing, etc., going to be severely punished?  Is that equivalent to desertion?
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Norgy on April 13, 2011, 01:54:40 PM
Quote from: Viking on April 13, 2011, 01:45:55 PM
The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.

Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: HVC on April 13, 2011, 02:03:51 PM
Quote from: Norgy on April 13, 2011, 01:54:40 PM
Quote from: Viking on April 13, 2011, 01:45:55 PM
The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.


Does the crown have a seperate security force (a la the secret service)?
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Viking on April 13, 2011, 02:13:18 PM
Quote from: Habbaku on April 13, 2011, 01:54:01 PM
This reminds me of the Sharpe movie in which Sharpe gets to deal with the Spanish royal guard...

Are those that were caught fleeing, etc., going to be severely punished?  Is that equivalent to desertion?

Probably nothing serious, though I expect they will either be discharged or moved to less "prestigious" units.
Quote from: HVC on April 13, 2011, 02:03:51 PM
Quote from: Norgy on April 13, 2011, 01:54:40 PM
Quote from: Viking on April 13, 2011, 01:45:55 PM
The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.


Does the crown have a seperate security force (a la the secret service)?

The Police provide personal security to the king, the government and visiting dignitaries.


Quote from: Norgy on April 13, 2011, 01:54:40 PM
Quote from: Viking on April 13, 2011, 01:45:55 PM
The Air Force, The Telemark Battalion (regular army unit deployed on UN and NATO missions) and the Kystjegerne (norwegian special forces with operate with the SBS) have fought recently and had no problems dealing with killing and being killed.

Exactly.

The Guards aren't soldiers - they're just another tourist attraction. Marching band and boys playing at being soldiers. Might as well just hire actors.

If they were the last line of defence, or first for that matter, Norway would indeed be in dire straits. But they aren't. This is another tempest in a tea cup. The real military role of his majesty's guards is non-existent.



Obviously they are not serious, but they are supposed to be a real unit in the army. They are supposed to be more than a marching band, honor guard and drill squad for state occasions and military tattoos. They are supposed to be one company of stood up infantry men, in addition to other duties.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Norgy on April 13, 2011, 02:21:30 PM
Quote from: Viking on April 13, 2011, 02:13:18 PM

Obviously they are not serious, but they are supposed to be a real unit in the army. They are supposed to be more than a marching band, honor guard and drill squad for state occasions and military tattoos. They are supposed to be one company of stood up infantry men, in addition to other duties.

I think the ship sailed there when they started to compete for military tattoo honours.
Besides, king's guard duty is sought after because it's light duty in Oslo. Booze, women and pay? Most males around 20 would gladly do a bit of marching and wear a silly hat for that.

Not that I don't agree that they should in fact be a military unit, but seeing as we fail to even provide enough plumbers and carpenters, I don't see young men flocking to become lowly soldiers.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Warspite on April 13, 2011, 04:07:20 PM
I thought you guys would have a rotation system for ceremonial duty; our Guards and cavalry units do their time on Horseguards and outside Buckingham Palace, but they also mix it up in Afghanistan.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: jamesww on April 13, 2011, 04:12:07 PM
I don't know the details, but I get the impression that the Guards infantrymen deployed at guard positions around London are supposed to be capable of reacting in an emergency. Though they may well not carry any ammunition, but would be promptly issued it from near at hand ? 

There's a barracks, whose name escapes me, in central London on birdcage walk, equidistant from Whitehall/Westminster and Buckingham palace , I'd be surprised if there weren't ready military assets there available to deploy if the police have a sudden serious crisis on their hands.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Slargos on April 13, 2011, 04:18:44 PM
I would've posted this, but I realized I've been ragging too much on the inept Norwegians lately.  :lol:

Norway really is a freak of a nation.

Norgy's excuses ring hollow. Having Guards soldiers hide under their beds during a call to arms is fucking embarrassing.  :D

Perhaps they can hire some Swedes instead. Seems if you need to get actual work done in this country, you can't turn to Norwegians.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: chipwich on April 13, 2011, 05:37:14 PM
I fully expect a military marching band to die for their country at a moments notice.

Certain college marching bands too.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Warspite on April 13, 2011, 05:55:28 PM
Quote from: jamesww on April 13, 2011, 04:12:07 PM
I don't know the details, but I get the impression that the Guards infantrymen deployed at guard positions around London are supposed to be capable of reacting in an emergency. Though they may well not carry any ammunition, but would be promptly issued it from near at hand ? 

There's a barracks, whose name escapes me, in central London on birdcage walk, equidistant from Whitehall/Westminster and Buckingham palace , I'd be surprised if there weren't ready military assets there available to deploy if the police have a sudden serious crisis on their hands.

Wellington Barracks. I think the troops there are just out of training, though I know a Captain there, managing a lot of the ceremonial duties, who recently came back from deployment in Afghanistan. He said it was odd having gone from shooting at Taliban and eating dust all day long to incessantly polishing brass buttons and arranging road closures.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: derspiess on April 13, 2011, 06:01:10 PM
WTF.  I would think that at that age you'd be going on pure adrenaline & ready for a fight if you thought the shit was hitting the fan.  Those cowards need to be purged from the ranks-- whatever their functional day-to-day role is, they're soldiers & should be expected to act as such.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: jamesww on April 13, 2011, 06:06:56 PM
Quote from: Warspite on April 13, 2011, 05:55:28 PM
Quote from: jamesww on April 13, 2011, 04:12:07 PM
I don't know the details, but I get the impression that the Guards infantrymen deployed at guard positions around London are supposed to be capable of reacting in an emergency. Though they may well not carry any ammunition, but would be promptly issued it from near at hand ? 

There's a barracks, whose name escapes me, in central London on birdcage walk, equidistant from Whitehall/Westminster and Buckingham palace , I'd be surprised if there weren't ready military assets there available to deploy if the police have a sudden serious crisis on their hands.

Wellington Barracks. I think the troops there are just out of training, though I know a Captain there, managing a lot of the ceremonial duties, who recently came back from deployment in Afghanistan. He said it was odd having gone from shooting at Taliban and eating dust all day long to incessantly polishing brass buttons and arranging road closures.


Does the one enable the other ?

Funnily enough a couple of days ago I was talking with army veteran, who'd served in the middle east during the retreat from empire, and he made the point about what we might called the 'stupid shit' being absolutely necessary.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Josquius on April 13, 2011, 06:48:14 PM
:lol:
Second paragraph made me laugh, was expecting them to be screw ups but wasn't expecting that.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Darth Wagtaros on April 13, 2011, 08:10:06 PM
I think the Union of Kalmar would have prevented this sad state of affairs.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: CountDeMoney on April 14, 2011, 06:01:35 AM
Quote from: Slargos on April 13, 2011, 04:18:44 PM
Norgy's excuses ring hollow. Having Guards soldiers hide under their beds during a call to arms is fucking embarrassing.  :D

I'd rather have a handful of Norwegian merchant marines.  Get 'em a bit liquored up, and they can take on anybody.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Viking on April 14, 2011, 06:34:45 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on April 14, 2011, 06:01:35 AM
Quote from: Slargos on April 13, 2011, 04:18:44 PM
Norgy's excuses ring hollow. Having Guards soldiers hide under their beds during a call to arms is fucking embarrassing.  :D

I'd rather have a handful of Norwegian merchant marines.  Get 'em a bit liquored up, and they can take on anybody.

There are no more Norwegian merchant marines. The only thing Norwegian about the Norwegian merchant fleet today is the location of the summer home that the owners can only spend 90 days a year in for tax reasons.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Grallon on April 14, 2011, 09:31:17 AM
The one directly facing your King(?) is quite pretty.  They should ditch the silly round hats though - I'm sure it doesn't help morale.



G.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Brazen on April 14, 2011, 09:39:14 AM
Aren't these the lot that have a Scottish penguin as their commander?
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Razgovory on April 14, 2011, 09:39:20 AM
Is this the unit that has a penguin as a colonel?
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Razgovory on April 14, 2011, 09:39:42 AM
Quote from: Brazen on April 14, 2011, 09:39:14 AM
Aren't these the lot that have a Scottish penguin as their commander?

Damn, you beat me to it!
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: The Brain on April 14, 2011, 11:28:26 AM
Norway is a failed state.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Valmy on April 14, 2011, 11:30:29 AM
Quote from: derspiess on April 13, 2011, 06:01:10 PM
WTF.  I would think that at that age you'd be going on pure adrenaline & ready for a fight if you thought the shit was hitting the fan.  Those cowards need to be purged from the ranks-- whatever their functional day-to-day role is, they're soldiers & should be expected to act as such.

Well I would think even cowards could find the courage to show up for a drill :P
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Viking on April 14, 2011, 11:57:38 AM
Quote from: Grallon on April 14, 2011, 09:31:17 AM
The one directly facing your King(?) is quite pretty.  They should ditch the silly round hats though - I'm sure it doesn't help morale.



G.

All ceremonial units have silly hats.
I thought silly hats were ghey?
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Tonitrus on April 14, 2011, 07:32:08 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on April 14, 2011, 06:01:35 AM
Quote from: Slargos on April 13, 2011, 04:18:44 PM
Norgy's excuses ring hollow. Having Guards soldiers hide under their beds during a call to arms is fucking embarrassing.  :D

I'd rather have a handful of Norwegian merchant marines.  Get 'em a bit liquored up, and they can take on anybody.

I'd rather have a Norwegian Bik...wait...does Norway have a Bikini Team, or only Sweden?
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Viking on April 14, 2011, 07:40:06 PM
Quote from: Tonitrus on April 14, 2011, 07:32:08 PM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on April 14, 2011, 06:01:35 AM
Quote from: Slargos on April 13, 2011, 04:18:44 PM
Norgy's excuses ring hollow. Having Guards soldiers hide under their beds during a call to arms is fucking embarrassing.  :D

I'd rather have a handful of Norwegian merchant marines.  Get 'em a bit liquored up, and they can take on anybody.

I'd rather have a Norwegian Bik...wait...does Norway have a Bikini Team, or only Sweden?

Sorry, only Sweden.
Title: Re: H.M. The King's Royal Guard
Post by: Razgovory on April 14, 2011, 09:26:46 PM
The Silly hats look like those ones for the elite Italian units.  That's not a good sign.