Languish.org

General Category => Off the Record => Topic started by: saskganesh on April 01, 2009, 07:55:25 PM

Title: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: saskganesh on April 01, 2009, 07:55:25 PM
He doesn't do impersonations (yet)  but based on the below story, I think he has a fine future being an after-dinner speaker, raconteur, and celebrity-charity do-gooder.

I hope he likes chicken.

QuoteBush bash

Dawn Walton, 17/03/09 at 8:49 PM EDT http://www.theglobeandmail.com/blogs/AlbertaWatch/

George W. Bush may not be the most popular president in U.S. history, but he's top-notch in the story telling department.

During a luncheon speech in Calgary today - the first since he left the White House - he regaled close to 2,000 people (those in attendance included former Alberta premier Ralph Klein and Senator Pamela Wallin as well as prominent Calgary businessman Fred Mannix and Brett Wilson) with tales of life inside and outside the Oval Office.

He said he's getting used to picking up dog poop, doing chores around his new Dallas home and running errands.

He said he was once "the most pampered man in the world," but now his wife, Laura, is busy reminding him of his status as a civilian and homebody.

"Just consider it your new domestic policy agenda," she told him.

He recalled the time he ventured out to buy a flashlight and batteries, but at the store he was met by a clerk who asked whether anyone ever told him he looked like George W. Bush, a sentiment to which he agreed.

"That must make you mad," the clerk responded, prompting a gusher of laughter from those assembled. (The clerk later asked him if he was looking for a job since the store was in need of a "greeter.")

Bush talked about his wife (She's awesome...She was an awesome First Lady.); his former secretary of state Condoleezza Rice (My dear, beloved Condi.); his former vice-president Dick Cheney (At least when my vice president shot somebody, it was on accident.); his dog, Barney (I'm crazy about Barney...I love that little guy.); former Russian president Vladimir Putin (Putin dissed my dog.); Prime Minister Stephen Harper (Harper has a good sense of humour.); whether Canada or the U.S. has the better financial system (You do.) and, movies that depict him (I don't pay attention to Hollywood.).

He went into detail about the time Putin tried to outshine Barney by showing off his massive hound during a summit as Harper looked on.

"Faster, stronger and bigger than Barney," said Putin.

"At least he only showed you his dog," Harper chimed in by way of support.


Bush also reflected on his popularity - or lack thereof - as hundreds of protesters gathered outside the convention centre. Four people would be arrested. Conjuring up the spirit of former Canadian prime minister John Diefenbaker, Bush said he never paid much attention to polls. "I've said many time that dogs know best the appropriate treatment of polls."

He mused more than once that he's going to get used to doing paid speeches.
After all, he has a mortgage to pay and no longer living in social housing. He said he plans to write a book so people will understand what it's like to sit in the Oval Office, a memoir that he hopes will give history more perspective by which his administration will be judged. In it he plans to outline the 12 toughest decisions he had to make during eight years in office.

Bush was not oblivious to the tight security - and a delay by Ticketmaster in getting in position to scan the tickets - that had guests waiting for more than an hour in the cold only to be greeted by a full-body pat down and search that pushed back his speech. He promised not to cut his time short.

"I'll sit here all day," he said at one point, "I'm flattered people even want to hear me in the first place."

"Putin dissed my dog." priceless.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: DontSayBanana on April 01, 2009, 08:01:09 PM
By all accounts, the guy seems fairly personable, and actually has a sense of humor that doesn't send you sneaking peeks at an encyclopedia. I remain convinced the guy got thrust into a bad situation as President and stands a real shot at being successful on the talking circuit.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Caliga on April 01, 2009, 08:02:30 PM
It would have been awesome if he took the greeter job at Wal-Mart. :(
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: DontSayBanana on April 01, 2009, 08:05:33 PM
You ever notice how, even when it's not what Bush actually says, most of the stories involving Bush also involve at least a minor element of "oh boy, he/she/they went there!"? Joking about Cheney shooting his hunting partner, f'rinstance.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Admiral Yi on April 02, 2009, 02:33:14 AM
Quote from: DontSayBanana on April 01, 2009, 08:05:33 PM
You ever notice how, even when it's not what Bush actually says, most of the stories involving Bush also involve at least a minor element of "oh boy, he/she/they went there!"? Joking about Cheney shooting his hunting partner, f'rinstance.
Article makes it seem he raised Cheney himself.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Richard Hakluyt on April 02, 2009, 02:40:52 AM
"He went into detail about the time Putin tried to outshine Barney by showing off his massive hound during a summit as Harper looked on.

"Faster, stronger and bigger than Barney," said Putin."

A bit of an insight into the way Putin thinks there, foreign policy ministers and departments take note.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Valmy on April 02, 2009, 09:39:12 AM
I always thought Bush was a good guy.  But there is that saying about good men doing the most harm in this world.

It is amazing how much more likeable presidents become once they leave office I have to say.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: PDH on April 02, 2009, 10:20:19 AM
Valmy, you are a good man.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Valmy on April 02, 2009, 10:21:01 AM
Quote from: PDH on April 02, 2009, 10:20:19 AM
Valmy, you are a good man.

Take that back!
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: derspiess on April 02, 2009, 10:50:16 AM
Quote from: Valmy on April 02, 2009, 09:39:12 AM
It is amazing how much more likeable presidents become once they leave office I have to say.

Well, when the 24/7 smear machines are turned off (or redirected), it's easier to see them in a positive light.  That goes for Clinton as well as Bush.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: BuddhaRhubarb on April 02, 2009, 11:00:27 AM
Harper is a humourless churl but otherwise funny story. I am sure Bush will do at least as well as Bubba on the post Prez cash-in via public speaking. (ironically enough)
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Valmy on April 02, 2009, 11:01:37 AM
Quote from: derspiess on April 02, 2009, 10:50:16 AM
Well, when the 24/7 smear machines are turned off (or redirected), it's easier to see them in a positive light.  That goes for Clinton as well as Bush.

Yep.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: fhdz on April 02, 2009, 11:07:03 AM
Harper's quip was funny. :D
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: saskganesh on April 02, 2009, 11:23:30 AM
Quote from: fahdiz on April 02, 2009, 11:07:03 AM
Harper's quip was funny. :D

If he showed his "human" side more, it would be a big benefit to him. He comes off as cold and callous much of the time.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: The Brain on April 02, 2009, 11:24:28 AM
I wish Hitler had gotten a chance to do what Bush is doing. I think people would have viewed Hitler in a different light. :(
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: BuddhaRhubarb on April 02, 2009, 11:37:26 AM
wow didn't even take a page for the Hitler comparison. still too soon for Bushie. I can't wait til Bush himself starts opening his speeches with jokes about how he was worse than Hitler.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: DGuller on April 02, 2009, 11:39:41 AM
Quote from: BuddhaRhubarb on April 02, 2009, 11:37:26 AM
wow didn't even take a page for the Hitler comparison. still too soon for Bushie. I can't wait til Bush himself starts opening his speeches with jokes about how he was worse than Hitler.
What did you expect, that's a pretty obvious comparison.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: fhdz on April 02, 2009, 11:39:58 AM
Quote from: The Brain on April 02, 2009, 11:24:28 AM
I wish Hitler had gotten a chance to do what Bush is doing. I think people would have viewed Hitler in a different light. :(

They'd have seen his awesome dancing skills. :(
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Savonarola on April 02, 2009, 11:42:24 AM
Quote from: DGuller on April 02, 2009, 11:39:41 AM
Quote from: BuddhaRhubarb on April 02, 2009, 11:37:26 AM
wow didn't even take a page for the Hitler comparison. still too soon for Bushie. I can't wait til Bush himself starts opening his speeches with jokes about how he was worse than Hitler.
What did you expect, that's a pretty obvious comparison.

:yes:

I heard that Stalin once dissed Hitler's dog.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Ed Anger on April 02, 2009, 01:54:34 PM
Quote from: Savonarola on April 02, 2009, 11:42:24 AM


:yes:

I heard that Stalin once dissed Hitler's dog.

Stalin fucked Blondie.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Savonarola on April 02, 2009, 02:01:02 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 02, 2009, 01:54:34 PM

Stalin fucked Blondie.

The entire band, or just Debbie Harry :unsure:
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Ed Anger on April 02, 2009, 02:04:18 PM
Quote from: Savonarola on April 02, 2009, 02:01:02 PM
Quote from: Ed Anger on April 02, 2009, 01:54:34 PM

Stalin fucked Blondie.

The entire band, or just Debbie Harry :unsure:

She had a heart of glass.

If you don't get it, Blondie was Hitler's German Shepard.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: The Brain on April 02, 2009, 02:13:29 PM
Did Stalin fuck Angel Eyes and Tuco too?
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: saskganesh on April 02, 2009, 03:07:16 PM
didja know that Debbie Harry is on tour this spring with the New Cars?
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: saskganesh on April 02, 2009, 03:09:00 PM
Quote from: The Brain on April 02, 2009, 11:24:28 AM
I wish Hitler had gotten a chance to do what Bush is doing. I think people would have viewed Hitler in a different light. :(

likely not. nobody likes a quitter. Swedes excepted.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: Savonarola on April 02, 2009, 03:15:46 PM
Quote from: saskganesh on April 02, 2009, 03:07:16 PM
didja know that Debbie Harry is on tour this spring with the New Cars?

I heard rumors; I think I'll read some reviews before I go see that.
Title: Re: BushII returns as ... a comedian
Post by: DontSayBanana on April 02, 2009, 07:36:56 PM
Quote from: derspiess on April 02, 2009, 10:50:16 AMWell, when the 24/7 smear machines are turned off (or redirected), it's easier to see them in a positive light.  That goes for Clinton as well as Bush.

It's also harder to appreciate a bumbling, "everyday joe" sense of humor in a man whose hand is constantly hovering over the red button. ;)