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General Category => Off the Record => Topic started by: Tonitrus on December 03, 2009, 12:24:34 PM

Title: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Tonitrus on December 03, 2009, 12:24:34 PM
Quote 'Elf' Jailed After Threat To Blow Up Santa At Georgia Mall

Thursday , December 03, 2009

AP

MORROW, Ga. —
A man dressed as an elf is jailed after police in Georgia say he told a mall Santa that he was carrying dynamite.

Police say Southlake Mall in suburban Atlanta was evacuated but no explosives were found.

Morrow police arrested 45-year-old William C. Caldwell III, who was being held without bond Thursday in the Clayton County jail. He was not part of the mall's Christmas staff.

Police say Caldwell got in line Wednesday evening to have his picture taken with Santa Claus.

Police say when Caldwell reached the front of the line, he told Santa he had dynamite in his bag. Santa called mall security and Caldwell was arrested.

Caldwell faces several charges, including having hoax devices and making terroristic threats.
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 01:03:41 PM
Quote from: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D
Heh, he can only be expecting coal in his Christmas stocking this year! 
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Martinus on December 03, 2009, 01:06:13 PM
Quote from: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 01:03:41 PM
Quote from: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D
Heh, he can only be expecting coal in his Christmas stocking this year!

Is this some euphemism for being anally raped by a black prison inmate?
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Malthus on December 03, 2009, 01:46:26 PM
Quote from: Martinus on December 03, 2009, 01:06:13 PM
Quote from: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 01:03:41 PM
Quote from: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D
Heh, he can only be expecting coal in his Christmas stocking this year!

Is this some euphemism for being anally raped by a black prison inmate?

The question is, whould he still be dressed as an elf at that point?
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Eddie Teach on December 03, 2009, 02:03:57 PM
You have some rather disturbing fantasies mal.
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Malthus on December 03, 2009, 02:06:40 PM
Quote from: Peter Wiggin on December 03, 2009, 02:03:57 PM
You have some rather disturbing fantasies mal.

I didn't even mention the candy canes.  :(
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 03:11:31 PM
Quote from: Martinus on December 03, 2009, 01:06:13 PM
Quote from: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 01:03:41 PM
Quote from: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D
Heh, he can only be expecting coal in his Christmas stocking this year!

Is this some euphemism for being anally raped by a black prison inmate?
Um, no...   :huh:  It's about the idea of badly behaved kids being punished by getting a lump of coal for Christmas. Parents used to say that, maybe still do, to keep kids in line, especially around Christmas.
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Malthus on December 03, 2009, 03:17:13 PM
Quote from: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 03:11:31 PM
Quote from: Martinus on December 03, 2009, 01:06:13 PM
Quote from: KRonn on December 03, 2009, 01:03:41 PM
Quote from: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D
Heh, he can only be expecting coal in his Christmas stocking this year!

Is this some euphemism for being anally raped by a black prison inmate?
Um, no...   :huh:  It's about the idea of badly behaved kids being punished by getting a lump of coal for Christmas. Parents used to say that, maybe still do, to keep kids in line, especially around Christmas.
\

The Germans, of course, do that one better.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krampus

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Nikolaus_krampus.png

This is just wrong, and seems to incorporate Marti's interpretation:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Krampus_still_looking_st_Nicholas_looks_on.jpg

"This Xmas, ask for anal"

Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Ed Anger on December 03, 2009, 03:19:51 PM
Quote from: dps on December 03, 2009, 12:38:59 PM
A 45-year old man getting in line to have his picture taken with Santa Claus should probably raised some warning flags to start with.   :D

Look, that fat fucker promised me a cylon raider when I was kid. He is going to deliver on that promise.

:mad:

Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: DGuller on December 03, 2009, 04:03:37 PM
I wonder how often parents actually do put a lump of coal in their child's stocking.  That has to be some badass way to discipline a child.
Title: Re: Insurgent elf terrorist targets Santa Claus with IED
Post by: Malthus on December 03, 2009, 04:13:17 PM
Quote from: DGuller on December 03, 2009, 04:03:37 PM
I wonder how often parents actually do put a lump of coal in their child's stocking.  That has to be some badass way to discipline a child.

[German] I still say dressing up as a demon and beating the shit out of them on Christmas is the way to go. [/German]