QuoteThe 'Spy' Who Fooled the EPA
Under deep CIA cover at the Office of Air and Radiation.
Nov. 21, 2013 7:02 p.m. ET
The Environmental Protection Agency wants to be the nation's super-regulator, though it might first try to regulate its own employees. At least the ones pretending to be James Bond.
The Department of Justice in late September announced a plea agreement with John C. Beale, until recently a senior career employee at EPA's Office of Air and Radiation. Beale, 64, has admitted to devoting most of his 23-year career to bilking taxpayers of some $900,000 in pay and expenses. "Saturday Night Live" couldn't come up with this story.
Information released by law enforcement, and details from an investigation by Louisiana Senator David Vitter, show that the fraud began when Beale stated in his 1989 EPA job application that he'd worked for the U.S. Senate, though there is no record of such employment. By 1994 Beale was claiming he was a CIA operative to justify prolonged absences. Apparently this raised no eyebrows at EPA.
Prosecutors estimate that from 2000 to 2013 Beale was absent from his EPA duties for a total of 2.5 years, claiming to be working for "Langley" or on a special EPA "research project." In 2008 he was gone for six months but never submitted a leave request. Around May 2011, Beale claimed to be retiring and celebrated with colleagues on a dinner cruise. An EPA manager admitted to not seeing Beale at the office after that, though not noticing until November 2012 that Beale was still on the payroll.
Beale used his "research" excuse to have taxpayers fund at least five trips to Los Angeles—worth $57,000 in travel expenses—to visit relatives and stay at nice hotels. Beale also claimed that he'd contracted malaria while serving in Vietnam, requiring taxpayers to cough up $18,000 for a handicapped parking spot in downtown Washington, D.C. He didn't serve in Vietnam and he didn't have malaria.
Beale was paid despite his absences and he received retention incentive bonuses that for a time made him among the highest paid employees at EPA. Mr. Vitter's office has noted that Beale was only approved to receive these bonuses for six years, yet EPA somehow handed them out for 23. Spooks the world over are jealous.
To recap: The same agency that wants to regulate the nation's carbon economy failed to vet a new hire, swallowed his spy stories, and paid a salary and bonuses to an employee who didn't come to work and whom it didn't notice was missing. EPA Inspector General Arthur Elkins, who is investigating the agency's employment and supervisory practices, says this fraud was the result of "an absence of even basic internal controls at the EPA."
Mr. Vitter is pushing for a Senate hearing into EPA mismanagement, but Environment and Public Works Chairman Barbara Boxer is resisting. Amid all of the other current demonstrations of government incompetence, perhaps she figures this is simply too embarrassing.
Ignoring the editorializing on EPA regulations, I'm more interested in the employee here. Pretty epic that he lies about his resume to get hired (that part is mundane/common), claims he is working for the CIA and that the EPA is just his cover job (this raises no eyebrows with his supervisors) and games the retention bonus system and travel expense systems to get improperly paid for $900,000 over the course of his career. He then stages a fake retirement for himself in 2011 and simply stops coming into work, but has never actually done the paperwork required to leave his job or actually retire, so he continued receiving normal paychecks during that time.
Probably not an isolated incident...
QuoteBeale also claimed that he'd contracted malaria while serving in Vietnam, requiring taxpayers to cough up $18,000 for a handicapped parking spot in downtown Washington, D.C. He didn't serve in Vietnam and he didn't have malaria.
:lol: That's hilarious.
I mean, if you're gonna go, go all the way: straight to a handicapped parking spot. :lol:
QuoteHe then stages a fake retirement for himself in 2011 and simply stops coming into work, but has never actually done the paperwork required to leave his job or actually retire, so he continued receiving normal paychecks during that time.
I wish I had thought of that.
Quote"Saturday Night Live" couldn't come up with this story.
WRITING.
Anyway, he should be shot, but I have considered intimating that I've been doing data analysis for the NSA. (Actually, I was wondering--someone's gotta read those emails, right? :hmm: )
Quote from: OttoVonBismarck on November 21, 2013, 10:27:23 PM
QuoteThe 'Spy' Who Fooled the EPA
Under deep CIA cover at the Office of Air and Radiation.
Nov. 21, 2013 7:02 p.m. ET
The Environmental Protection Agency wants to be the nation's super-regulator, though it might first try to regulate its own employees. At least the ones pretending to be James Bond.
Seen this a while ago but cant remember where. Mind boggling really. Utter management incompetence
Quote from: 11B4V on November 22, 2013, 02:37:18 AM
Quote from: OttoVonBismarck on November 21, 2013, 10:27:23 PM
QuoteThe 'Spy' Who Fooled the EPA
Under deep CIA cover at the Office of Air and Radiation.
Nov. 21, 2013 7:02 p.m. ET
The Environmental Protection Agency wants to be the nation's super-regulator, though it might first try to regulate its own employees. At least the ones pretending to be James Bond.
Seen this a while ago but cant remember where. Mind boggling really. Utter management incompetence
Quote from: sbr on November 22, 2013, 08:22:04 AM
Quote from: vinraith on November 22, 2013, 02:37:18 AM
Quote from: OttoVonBismarck on November 21, 2013, 10:27:23 PM
QuoteThe 'Spy' Who Fooled the EPA
Under deep CIA cover at the Office of Air and Radiation.
Nov. 21, 2013 7:02 p.m. ET
The Environmental Protection Agency wants to be the nation's super-regulator, though it might first try to regulate its own employees. At least the ones pretending to be James Bond.
Seen this a while ago but cant remember where. Mind boggling really. Utter management incompetence
Howdy Vinraith. LTNS.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 21, 2013, 10:33:47 PM
QuoteBeale also claimed that he'd contracted malaria while serving in Vietnam, requiring taxpayers to cough up $18,000 for a handicapped parking spot in downtown Washington, D.C. He didn't serve in Vietnam and he didn't have malaria.
:lol: That's hilarious.
I mean, if you're gonna go, go all the way: straight to a handicapped parking spot. :lol:
Steal $20 and you are a petty thief. Steal a million and you are either a hero or the Government.
Terry Pratchett.
Quote from: Darth Wagtaros on November 22, 2013, 10:02:00 AM
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 21, 2013, 10:33:47 PM
I mean, if you're gonna go, go all the way: straight to a handicapped parking spot. :lol:
Steal $20 and you are a petty thief. Steal a million and you are either a hero or the Government.
Terry Pratchett.
I applaud his wherewithal to go for the handicapped parking spot. No convenience is too trivial for this man.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 21, 2013, 10:33:47 PM
QuoteBeale also claimed that he'd contracted malaria while serving in Vietnam, requiring taxpayers to cough up $18,000 for a handicapped parking spot in downtown Washington, D.C. He didn't serve in Vietnam and he didn't have malaria.
:lol: That's hilarious.
I mean, if you're gonna go, go all the way: straight to a handicapped parking spot. :lol:
Yeah, hilarious. Frigging shoddy due diligence on giving this guy Vet's benefits!
Among others. HR during his hiring process, but mainly his immediate supervision.
6 months without a proper leave slip? Consistent payroll issues? $57,000 in expense reports?
Shit, I would get the nasty phone call from Finance in a heartbeat if I forgot to submit somebody's credit card statement, or didn't get their time slip in by 10am. And heaven help me if I let somebody stay at a Hilton instead of a Motel 6. What the fuck.
Although, I did appreciate the "editorializing", as Otto pointed out. ZOMG TEH EVUL REGULATORS CANT REGULATE EXPENCE REPORTS HOW CAN THEY REGULATE TEH POLLUTION
If anything, this story should make the GOPers happy: no regulation was involved with this guy at all. He exercised his libertyism and freedomtude to the best of his abilities. He was truly a self-made man, relying upon his gifts, abilities and initiative.
I think what I like the most is him staging a retirement party for himself, then he stops going into work all while continuing to collect a full paycheck. The sheer balls it takes to pull something off like that, and I'm sure they gave him a big retirement party and send off, too.
Oh, you know the fucker got one hell of a watch. Probably picked it out himself.
Quote from: CountDeMoney on November 21, 2013, 10:33:47 PM
I mean, if you're gonna go, go all the way: straight to a handicapped parking spot. :lol:
Its the big lie that is the hardest to disprove.
I bet the guy is a Frank Abagnale fan.
Hell, it would not surprise me if this guy is a sock puppet here.