Barrister's obnoxious thread full of smug parenting stories

[Malthus]

Which is an idiotic attitude, as highways are the safest roads.  Which doesn't mean that you still don't need to be taught the basics.  But my instructors had the same attitude, so I had to learn it on my own as well.

Safest in terms of property or in terms of casualty?

In terms of everything.  Accident rate, fatality rate, property damage rate.  Road design >> low speed, when it comes to traffic deaths.  You may be going faster on freeways, but you're far less likely to hit another car, and far less likely to  come to a sudden stop if you do hit something.  You can't t-bone someone in an intersection on a highway, nor can you drift into opposing lane to hit someone head-on, which are two of the most dangerous types of accidents.

Heh, interesting.

Of course, by refusing to teach students the basics of highway driving, those instructors were doing their little bit to change those statistics. 

[Barrister]

So around 4:30, I'm outside with Timmy.  We're playing a little bit of road hockey, just one on one (I couldn't convince Andrew to come outside, and Joshua was outside, but happily playing with dead leaves and mud).

After 15-20 minutes, I see a father and son approaching.  The kid is one of the kids my wife looks after after school, but I've never met.  Their house is just outside of our cul-de-sac.  They're east indian, but they want to play hockey.

So we play two-on-two, adults against kids.  It was blast.  Unspoken but of course we let the kids win, though sometimes there wasn't so much "letting" as I might have liked.

My wife was watching from the upstairs window afterwards as I was cleaning up when it was time to come inside.  She asked why I had such a grin on my face.  I guess it was just such a Canadian fatherhood moment.

[Tonitrus]

Every night the local news reports someone dying on a two lane highway.

Happens all the time.  Somebody crossing that center line brings your day to a conclusion rather quickly.

The highway south of out town (the only way down to the Kenai peninsula) is notorious for that in the summer time.  Mostly due to dumb shits who cannot wait for when they get to the passing lanes (or trying to pass around the line of cars that is slowed down for some tourist trying to pull off to the side to look at the mountains/whales in the inlet) trying to pass in the oncoming lame.

[DGuller]

Every night the local news reports someone dying on a two lane highway.

I meant freeways then, roads that are built to interstate highway standards.  I didn't mean highways such as "Kings Highway" in Brooklyn.  Two lane roads are in fact the most dangerous kinds of roads out there.

[CountDeMoney]

So the 4th grade niece got elected to the student council, and won the election for Vice President.  I called her and wished her congratulations and offered her some words of advice and encouragement, as uncles are wont to do.

5 minutes later my sister calls back, asking me what "never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut" has to do with Political Science.  Told her it was a Morgenthau thing.

[Barrister]

Timmy had a hockey game at 5pm today.  Starting at 8am was a constant refrain of "how long till hockey?"

Dude - it's nine hours away. 

[Barrister]

Not obnoxious, and definitely not smug, parenting story.

Was dreaming last night - can't really remember what I was dreaming about, but it was pretty banal and uninteresting.  But I realized in my dream 'hey I haven't heard from the boys in a while'.  I remembered they were playing in the tub, so I run over - and two little bodies lying motionless at the bottom.

I awoke with a gasp, and couldn't really get back to sleep the rest of the night.  That was just awful.

[Malthus]

Not obnoxious, and definitely not smug, parenting story.

Was dreaming last night - can't really remember what I was dreaming about, but it was pretty banal and uninteresting.  But I realized in my dream 'hey I haven't heard from the boys in a while'.  I remembered they were playing in the tub, so I run over - and two little bodies lying motionless at the bottom.

I awoke with a gasp, and couldn't really get back to sleep the rest of the night.  That was just awful.

Gods. That's terrible.

When Carl was a baby, I used to have such nightmares. In my dream, I would wake up, run to his crib, and find him not breathing. Then I would wake up for real. And run to his crib. To find him breathing just fine.

Being totally sleep deprived made it worse, and the nightmares made me more sleep deprived.

Once, I actually had the dream-within-the-dream thing. In my dream, I woke up, ran to the crib, baby not breathing. Then, as usual, I woke up, ran to the crib - and he was REALLY not breathing! Then I woke up.

No more sleep for me that night. 

[derspiess]

So the 4th grade niece got elected to the student council, and won the election for Vice President.  I called her and wished her congratulations and offered her some words of advice and encouragement, as uncles are wont to do.

5 minutes later my sister calls back, asking me what "never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut" has to do with Political Science.  Told her it was a Morgenthau thing.

Lol Seedy the Gent.

[frunk]

The first week we had our daughter home one of us was awake at all times with the baby.  It might have cut down on our total sleep, but it meant that when we did sleep it was more restful since we knew the other person was watching out. 

[Valmy]

The first week we had our daughter home one of us was awake at all times with the baby.  It might have cut down on our total sleep, but it meant that when we did sleep it was more restful since we knew the other person was watching out. 

We did that with baby #1 as well.

With baby #2 we had no shits to give. If it lives through us sleeping then great.

[Ed Anger]

I turned my basement into a fighting pit for children.

[katmai]

I turned my basement into a fighting pit for children.

Worse than Hitler.

[Richard Hakluyt]

Vegetarian snacks for the kids between bouts though.

[Ed Anger]

VEGETARIAN? No faggoty on my watch mister! Raw meat! The blood of your opponents!