How the wannabe super-morbidly-obese justify their lifestyle

[Brazen]

I came across this on a health and fitness forum. The poster had blogged about two women's battle to be the first to weight 1000lbs. Having been over 500lbs herself and slimmed to a healthy weight, the poster felt justified in having an opinion on the matter. She received the following rather starling comment, which is quite an insight into what's going on in the mind of these self-feeders:

Shannon

"I can't see how anyone could ever be truly happy that overweight... but these ladies say that they are. It has to be some mental issue..."

I think you have more to learn about yourself before you can claim to know much about these women. You freely admit that you can't see how anyone could ever be happy being so fat, and when confronted with the truth of such people you conclude they are mentally ill. You never stopped to question the thoroughness of your own perspective. People can enjoy all kinds of things that you don't care about, or even hate. You can't project your own experiences onto that of others.

I'm on a similar quest of weight gain, although not as heavy as those two and not nearly fool enough to blast my name and picture all over the media. But I'm heavy enough that I can attest to their honesty when they say they enjoy life at very high weights. I do too, and I enjoy putting weight on just as fervently as some people enjoy losing it. I'm in a scooter. I need oxygen. I need help getting up. A part of me enjoys the luxury of all the pampering I get, but that doesn't mean I don't pay my taxes like everyone else. (I work from home on IT and web development, and I guarantee you I've already paid more in taxes than many people contribute in a whole lifetime.) And a part of me misses going bicycling and walking around town, but that doesn't mean I don't get a great quality of life in my daily habits like eating, reading, conversations with friends, music, sex, the Internet, movies, and so on. What's so bad about my life? Is it that I can't run a marathon? Is it that my partner has to put his hands on me all the time to help me out? How are those bad things?

I don't exercise. I don't care to. I enjoy being unfit. It's a fetish thing. You're not being asked to empathize with it, but it's not really any different from the leather or shoes or fur or any of the other kinky stuff people come up with to satisfy themselves. I get sexual fulfillment from getting fatter, and that's worth a lot to me. If you've ever known sexual fulfillment yourself, you understand.

I know I'm not going to live forever. Who will? I'm focused on living well, not on meeting other people's expectations about what I'm supposed to be doing with my life. I am healthy for the time being. That's not a claim. That's a fact as surely as Susanne's doctor said about her in the article. I am under no delusions about the fact that for very big people like myself, sheer bulk (not fatness per se) causes a strain on the body. I've had heart problems that require me to take medication to stay healthy, and gastrointestinal problems associated with moving so much food and waste through my system, which also require medicine for me to stay healthy. With those medicines I am as healthy as the next person and have been able to continue to gain weight rapidly. Maybe you don't buy that someone who is healthy because of medicine is actually "healthy," but then we merely have a difference of agreement about word meaning and not the objective reality of the performance of my vital organs.

I can't make any claims that I'll stay healthy, but I won't. Who will? Maybe it'll happen to me sooner than to someone a few hundred pounds lighter. If that's how things turn out, leave it to me to deal with it. I am not asking for your concern. Nor is your criticism called for, or accurate, when it comes to the "burden" that fat people allegedly place on everyone else. Never mind that social welfare nets are for helping all people instead of just the ones who will use the fewest resources. And never mind that I buy private insurance and am subsidizing far more dangerous lifestyles than my own without being the least bit upset by it. And never mind that I already mentioned that I pay more than the average taxpayer because I am fortune enough to be on the higher end of the middle class. And never mind that I'm healthy today, with no indication at all of problems, making this whole line of discussion academic.

Instead, I might also remind you of that study out of the Netherlands a few years ago that discovered that obese people cost the health system less, because they live a few years shorter on average. That's right. Less. Fat people cost less. If it's really about costing money, we should all be huge. But there's also a study out just a couple weeks ago elaborating on the fact that fat itself is not a good indicator of who gets sick and who doesn't. It's other stuff, like genetics, or a roller coaster of weight gain and weight loss, or diet, or exercise, or the social stigma that fat people have to live with. That explains why a large percentage of obese people don't have more health problems than their thinner counterparts, and even live longer. Body fat seems to be an aggravating condition for a subset of the population who has existing health problems. For others, it seems to have little effect. Yet fat-bashers treat fat like a godsent allegory of shattered morality. Where's the sense in that?

Look at what those fat ladies' candor does for them: You yourself, and other people commenting here, are calling them mentally ill, suicidal, attention-seeking. I've heard it all. No self-respect. No self-discipline. Ugly. Stupid. Lazy. Smelly. "Gross." This is prejudice. Donna Simpson has gotten death threats on blogs and forums around the world (which I know because I've kept up with her story). People are totally okay with writing on the Internet their preference that human beings should be murdered for being fat.

This brutal hatred has nothing to do with the two fat women themselves, and everything to do with the people dishing out the bigotry. What makes you do it? "Mental issues"? Hah! I wouldn't dare presume. Maybe you honestly just never thought about it. Whatever the reason, you can do better. Not only are you depriving yourself of the opportunity to accept the truth, but you are actively persecuting a group of people and you don't seem to realize it. You can do so much better than that.

I'll tell you the worst thing for me about being fat: I hate being hated by people who don't know anything about me but think they know it all. I don't expect people to support my decision to be fat–real tolerance takes a long time, after all, and the fat acceptance movement is young–but I'd like it very much if folks like yourself and your gallery of commenters would think twice before making the kinds of accusations you're making.

In good will and all seriousness, I urge you to reconsider your attitude.

[Eddie Teach]

Instead, I might also remind you of that study out of the Netherlands a few years ago that discovered that obese people cost the health system less, because they live a few years shorter on average. That's right. Less. Fat people cost less.

This part makes perfect sense to me. She'll probably be dead in ten years.


I really don't want to think about the sexual fulfillment bits.

[Brazen]

This part makes perfect sense to me. She'll probably be dead in ten years.

At least she's got private healthcare. The sad fact is increasing amounts of NHS money is being wasted on people who can't put down the fork or walk to the end of the garden. Like other self-inflicted health epidemics like smoking, a lot of money has been invested in new techniques and procedures just to keep fat people alive. Bariatric surgery now seems to be the first course of action rather than diet and exercise, simply because a one-hour operation works out cheaper than months of consultancy.

[Ideologue]

I get sexual fulfillment from getting fatter, and that's worth a lot to me. If you've ever known sexual fulfillment yourself, you understand.

I guess I've never known sexual fulfillment.

[Josquius]

Instead, I might also remind you of that study out of the Netherlands a few years ago that discovered that obese people cost the health system less, because they live a few years shorter on average. That's right. Less. Fat people cost less.

It might be true. But...the way she takes 'a study' as gospel truth and throws it in people's face like that.

Anyway, total freak.

[Brazen]

Also what happens if the partner she depends on walks out and she can't find another chubby-chaser? She'll be found dead flopped out of bed and half-way to the fridge. Or toilet *shudders*

[CountDeMoney]

Also what happens if the partner she depends on walks out and she can't find another chubby-chaser?

There are over 41 million black people in the United States.  She'll find someone.

[Monoriu]

I'd like to be a friend of the fat acceptance movement 

[CountDeMoney]

I'd like to be a friend of the fat acceptance movement 

Yearbooks, class rings and haircuts are included.  So you're out, shitbird.

[Warspite]

It sounds like a terrific troll.

[Drakken]

She's just an extreme case of the so-called "fat acceptance movement". Of course, if she can't go out because she's too fat and she's too self-absorbed to look around on her scooter, she won't see the look of utter contempt and disgust she'll sollicit in most people around her.

The brain, so powerful an organ, that it can convince you that sabotaging your health to the point of courting death and looking like a slob leads to happiness.

I just love that part, though:

Instead, I might also remind you of that study out of the Netherlands a few years ago that discovered that obese people cost the health system less, because they live a few years shorter on average. That's right. Less. Fat people cost less.

She's right, folks: Use up the fatties. The dead cost nothing. It would be so less burdensome for our health system if all those pesky sick people would just die off, don't ya think? 

[viper37]

At least she's got private healthcare.

doesn't really matter.  Insurance company never charge the full amount one person costs.  And if she got here insurance while slim, she probably still got a good rate.
The above average costs are shifted to everyone insured by that company, and other companies too, through re-insurance.

[merithyn]

I would point out that this is in the mind of a single woman. It is not how all of the super obese justify their lifestyle, but rather how this one woman does.

Coming from a family of obese people, I can assure you that this isn't how everyone thinks. To my family at least, they live their lives, and in the process become big. They recognize that they are obese, recognize the issues inherent in that, but choose to continue to live their lives happy rather than concerned about what other people think. My family is, for the most part, healthy. In fact, my foster mother is 87 this October and has been more than 150 pounds overweight her entire life. The only medical problems she has ever had stem from her Rheumatoid Arthritis, not her obesity.

For a good chunk of my life, I put obesity in my family down to a cultural thing. It's not unusual to see families of super-obese Mexicans where I grew up. The thing is, more of them are still very healthy, even if big people. My eldest brother - who's in his 60s now - still takes care of the sick and elderly as a homecare provider, though he's been 150 pounds or more overweight most of my life. He's not on high-blood pressure medicine, doesn't have diabetes, and overall, is doing just fine.

The assumption that all obese people like being catered to, are horribly ill due to their weight, and are overall just selfish people is ridiculous. Just as not all thin people are healthy, not all overweight people are unhealthy.

[mongers]

It sounds like a terrific troll.

You could well be right.

Anyone else remember the 'Not The Nine O'clock News' sketch 'Stout, proud to be fat' * ?



* Unfortunately not on youtube.

[Valmy]

The assumption that all obese people like being catered to, are horribly ill due to their weight, and are overall just selfish people is ridiculous. Just as not all thin people are healthy, not all overweight people are unhealthy.

I think people approach this on a society wide basis.  There are, of course, plenty of people who exercise and eat a reasonable amount and are overweight anyway because well this is America and our food and drink tend to get us overweight and our culture in general is a sedentary one so it is not like they are moving around much just going about their business.  I remember talking to a woman who ran marathons but STILL had to join weight watchers.  Some people are always going to be overwieght because that is just how their body is. 

But for most people they are not being responsible about their health and that is the issue.  Granted it sort of sucks we have a culture where, unless you are responsible and take concious steps to prevent it, you will probably be overweight.

But really not being concerned with what other people think is just good advice for life.  No matter who you are there are going to be people who disapprove of something you are doing.

Also Meri there is a pretty dramatic difference between being 150 lbs overweight and being 500+ pounds.