TV/Movies Megathread

[frunk]

5 things I've learned about the world from the first season of Danger 5

1.  Hitler was a terrible shot.
2.  There's one sure way to differentiate between an Italian and a Romanian.
3.  You can shoot people through the phone.
4.  The Nazis were motivated by horniness more often than I thought.
5.  The Sit Down gun is a brilliant idea.

[celedhring]

Fantastic interview with Jim Abrahams and the Zucker brothers telling the story of Airplane!

http://www.avclub.com/article/surely-you-cant-be-serious-oral-history-airplane-218043

[jimmy olsen]

Bought a ticket for Avengers: Age of Ultron. Going be seeing the 8pm Thursday showing.

[Ideologue]

Watched the Harry Potter series.  It was ok, though the franchise would have been inordinately improved if Goblet of Fire was just the first of five (maybe four) movies.  It's there that the series' aesthetic comes into its own thanks to better cinematography, production design, etc., and also where the severe narrative problems are at least toned down a little bit, although they're never completely eliminated.

Those problems being: deus ex machina endings which are completely incoherent in the moment and explained later (sometimes much later), if at all; just enough cool magical duels to whet your appetite, outnumbered ten to one by scenes of combatants calling their attacks followed by light shows that are meant to evoke lightsaber duels and are not nearly as cool as the filmmakers insist they are; the series' dead-horse-beating approach to its world-building that extends every film by a solid forty-five minutes; and, of course, the foundational flaw--which is a focus on Harry, Hermione, and Ron, rather than Dumbledore, Voldemort, and Snape until it's almost too late (this is, naturally, co-extensive with the routine failure of the scripts and Radcliffe, Watson, and Grint's performances to make Harry, et al, feel like more than mere collections of notes, and sometimes I'm not sure Harry even achieves that).

Taking them as they come:

Sorceror's Stone: Two and a half hours of exposition, random bullshit, and stale Britishisms followed by a climax that has to be carefully explained in order to make sense.  You know, for the kids.  C

Chamber of Secrets: Similar, but better.  Draco Malfoy may be the lamest screen bully of all time.  But realize this: Ken Branagh makes everything better, and the image of Branagh beaming at the portrait of himself, seen painting another portrait of himself, would make my top five moments of the series.  This one has an even worse deus ex machina ending, that feels more D+D campaign or a video game than a narrative (at least stabbing the book does make sense, even if the circumstances were contrived).  Nonetheless I have some fondness for this one as a basically-functional kids' adventure starring Ken Branagh and featuring a cool ghost, but good God is it still too long.  B

Prisoner of Azkaban:  Utterly pointless and it turns out the guy named Remus Lupin or whatever is a werewolf.  I wanted to punch my DVD.  I did enjoy the map that tracks the movements of everyone at Hogwarts (pretty much all of these movies have at least one "cool idea," and this is Azkaban's).  I also enjoyed that Azkaban is where the pattern became a running gag, in regards the Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers always being traitors, cowardly, or otherwise undesirable.  Now, you may argue that I need to be told who Sirius Black is at a feature's length (and fucking change).  And I counter, "Why?" As for that deus ex machina ending... try "deus ex machina third act."  I know this is Cuaron but it did not impress me.  C

Goblet of Fire:  When I say this should have been the first film, what I mean is this is where they could have gotten all the having-fun-at-wizard-school bullshit out of the way in a reasonably entertaining package prior to transitioning to the dark, scary war story that the Potter series becomes.  They essentially do this twice already, in Stone and Secrets, but no one cares till Ralph Fiennes shows up, and you can't entirely blame them.  Another garbage deus ex machina ending, but at least it looked awesome and felt right. B

The Order of the Phoenix:  This is the one least plagued by the usual issues, and it is enormously pretty: the production design for the Ministry of Magic is top notch and Slawovir Idziak's cinematography is the best in the whole series, including the next one.  The extended fight at the end (and especially the duel) is the first magic battle in the series that feels interesting as a contest between wise and powerful wizards, and of course it ends too soon, but it is great.  This film is also a reasonable length and for the first time the series doesn't feel overburdened by all its non-essentials.  That said, I'm pretty sure there's some crap in here, but I don't remember it thanks to Dumbledore and Voldemort being genuinely bad-ass.  This one is my favorite.  B+

Half-Blood Prince:  Wintry palette by Bruno Delbonnel, and enjoyable as a sub-Empire Strikes Back "we're all doomed" penultimate chapter.  Dumbledore is in this one a lot.  Why it matters who kills Harry Potter makes no sense to me, but I probably have just gotten used to less than complete sense-making by this point.  B

Deathly Hallows, parts I and II:  I didn't take notes, so let's just treat them as one.  I liked the sudden emergence of what seemed like actual personalities in the kids (I have a weakness for impromptu dancing scenes--I was told this wasn't in the book, and my reply was, "Big surprise").  Let's list what I did not like: I did not like the part where a hugely important event, tantamount to Voldemort's victory over everything good, happens both offscreen and in a tossed-off line of dialogue that I had forgotten about by the time I actually needed to remember it; I did not like a battle scene that forgot the Deatheaters could fucking fly and therefore obliged them to take a bridge; I did not like that Draco Malfoy still poops his pants like a little baby; I did not like the untidiness of Harry's final fate; and I definitely did not like the structural hash that Harry's final fate makes of the last thirty minutes.  As for what I did like: I liked the tone and pace of the two films; I greatly enjoyed increased presence of Voldemort; I was pleasantly shocked at the radical, mind-bending twist regarding Harry's nature; and I absolutely adored the animated fairy tale sequence about the Deathly Hallows.  The latter led me to exclaim "Why can't the whole series be this awesome and fun and interesting?"  That's something I said a lot throughout the series, because it's a lot of little good ideas encased, practically mummified at times, by slogging minutia.  Still, it was largely a fun experience and I would recommend it overall.  B+

[Ideologue]

Bought a ticket for Avengers: Age of Ultron. Going be seeing the 8pm Thursday showing.

  That is pretty soon, ain't it?

[jimmy olsen]

Bought a ticket for Avengers: Age of Ultron. Going be seeing the 8pm Thursday showing.

  That is pretty soon, ain't it?

Three days for me, ten for you!

[Martinus]

Watched the Harry Potter series.  It was ok, though the franchise would have been inordinately improved if Goblet of Fire was just the first of five (maybe four) movies.  It's there that the series' aesthetic comes into its own thanks to better cinematography, production design, etc., and also where the severe narrative problems are at least toned down a little bit, although they're never completely eliminated.

Those problems being: deus ex machina endings which are completely incoherent in the moment and explained later (sometimes much later), if at all; just enough cool magical duels to whet your appetite, outnumbered ten to one by scenes of combatants calling their attacks followed by light shows that are meant to evoke lightsaber duels and are not nearly as cool as the filmmakers insist they are; the series' dead-horse-beating approach to its world-building that extends every film by a solid forty-five minutes; and, of course, the foundational flaw--which is a focus on Harry, Hermione, and Ron, rather than Dumbledore, Voldemort, and Snape until it's almost too late (this is, naturally, co-extensive with the routine failure of the scripts and Radcliffe, Watson, and Grint's performances to make Harry, et al, feel like more than mere collections of notes, and sometimes I'm not sure Harry even achieves that).

Taking them as they come:

Sorceror's Stone: Two and a half hours of exposition, random bullshit, and stale Britishisms followed by a climax that has to be carefully explained in order to make sense.  You know, for the kids.  C

Chamber of Secrets: Similar, but better.  Draco Malfoy may be the lamest screen bully of all time.  But realize this: Ken Branagh makes everything better, and the image of Branagh beaming at the portrait of himself, seen painting another portrait of himself, would make my top five moments of the series.  This one has an even worse deus ex machina ending, that feels more D+D campaign or a video game than a narrative (at least stabbing the book does make sense, even if the circumstances were contrived).  Nonetheless I have some fondness for this one as a basically-functional kids' adventure starring Ken Branagh and featuring a cool ghost, but good God is it still too long.  B

Prisoner of Azkaban:  Utterly pointless and it turns out the guy named Remus Lupin or whatever is a werewolf.  I wanted to punch my DVD.  I did enjoy the map that tracks the movements of everyone at Hogwarts (pretty much all of these movies have at least one "cool idea," and this is Azkaban's).  I also enjoyed that Azkaban is where the pattern became a running gag, in regards the Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers always being traitors, cowardly, or otherwise undesirable.  Now, you may argue that I need to be told who Sirius Black is at a feature's length (and fucking change).  And I counter, "Why?" As for that deus ex machina ending... try "deus ex machina third act."  I know this is Cuaron but it did not impress me.  C

Goblet of Fire:  When I say this should have been the first film, what I mean is this is where they could have gotten all the having-fun-at-wizard-school bullshit out of the way in a reasonably entertaining package prior to transitioning to the dark, scary war story that the Potter series becomes.  They essentially do this twice already, in Stone and Secrets, but no one cares till Ralph Fiennes shows up, and you can't entirely blame them.  Another garbage deus ex machina ending, but at least it looked awesome and felt right. B

The Order of the Phoenix:  This is the one least plagued by the usual issues, and it is enormously pretty: the production design for the Ministry of Magic is top notch and Slawovir Idziak's cinematography is the best in the whole series, including the next one.  The extended fight at the end (and especially the duel) is the first magic battle in the series that feels interesting as a contest between wise and powerful wizards, and of course it ends too soon, but it is great.  This film is also a reasonable length and for the first time the series doesn't feel overburdened by all its non-essentials.  That said, I'm pretty sure there's some crap in here, but I don't remember it thanks to Dumbledore and Voldemort being genuinely bad-ass.  This one is my favorite.  B+

Half-Blood Prince:  Wintry palette by Bruno Delbonnel, and enjoyable as a sub-Empire Strikes Back "we're all doomed" penultimate chapter.  Dumbledore is in this one a lot.  Why it matters who kills Harry Potter makes no sense to me, but I probably have just gotten used to less than complete sense-making by this point.  B

Deathly Hallows, parts I and II:  I didn't take notes, so let's just treat them as one.  I liked the sudden emergence of what seemed like actual personalities in the kids (I have a weakness for impromptu dancing scenes--I was told this wasn't in the book, and my reply was, "Big surprise").  Let's list what I did not like: I did not like the part where a hugely important event, tantamount to Voldemort's victory over everything good, happens both offscreen and in a tossed-off line of dialogue that I had forgotten about by the time I actually needed to remember it; I did not like a battle scene that forgot the Deatheaters could fucking fly and therefore obliged them to take a bridge; I did not like that Draco Malfoy still poops his pants like a little baby; I did not like the untidiness of Harry's final fate; and I definitely did not like the structural hash that Harry's final fate makes of the last thirty minutes.  As for what I did like: I liked the tone and pace of the two films; I greatly enjoyed increased presence of Voldemort; I was pleasantly shocked at the radical, mind-bending twist regarding Harry's nature; and I absolutely adored the animated fairy tale sequence about the Deathly Hallows.  The latter led me to exclaim "Why can't the whole series be this awesome and fun and interesting?"  That's something I said a lot throughout the series, because it's a lot of little good ideas encased, practically mummified at times, by slogging minutia.  Still, it was largely a fun experience and I would recommend it overall.  B+

[Syt]

Bought a ticket for Avengers: Age of Ultron. Going be seeing the 8pm Thursday showing.

  That is pretty soon, ain't it?

Three days for me, ten for you!

First screenings here are on Wednesdays, but unless you want shitty seats in one of the three English language theaters they're pretty much sold out. I'll probably go on the weekend.

[Sheilbh]

Prisoner of Azkaban is the best film. That you failed to note Imelda Staunton's performance makes me distrust all your other opinions on the series.

Interesting that none are lower than a C (the first two definitely are).

[Duque de Bragança]

Bought a ticket for Avengers: Age of Ultron. Going be seeing the 8pm Thursday showing.

  That is pretty soon, ain't it?

Three days for me, ten for you!

First screenings here are on Wednesdays, but unless you want shitty seats in one of the three English language theaters they're pretty much sold out. I'll probably go on the weekend.

There are premieres tomorrow around midnight (between Tuesday and Wednesday) but I'll catch an IMAX 3D screening beyond the periphérique (La banlieue !) and it will probably be empty given the not-so practical hour.

[Syt]

They have an English language IMAX 3D screening at 3pm on Thursday, but I don't feel like taking half a day off for this. Normally their time slots for original versions are 5pm on Wednesday and 10:30pm on Fridays.

[celedhring]

Prisoner of Azkaban is the best film. That you failed to note Imelda Staunton's performance makes me distrust all your other opinions on the series.

Interesting that none are lower than a C (the first two definitely are).

The first two are allright harmless children films. I think their modesty actually makes them more successful than some of the ones that come after them, which often crumble under the weight of their ambitions. I agree with Ide that aesthetically and directorially they are the most uninteresting, though.

[lustindarkness]

Wow, theres that many Harry Potter movies? I now realize I have only seen the first 3, I think.

[Liep]

Just saw the new Jurassic Park trailer and it comes in well below Star Wars but still quite a bit above Terminator in How Excited I Am About A Franchise Comeback - 2015 Edition.

[Josquius]

History of Future Folk- Watched randomly but actually rather good little low budget musical (in the good sense of the word, not the every freaking scene is a song sense) low budget sci-fi comedy. Alien comes to destroy the earth, discovers music, becomes a folk singer instead.

The first two are allright harmless children films. I think their modesty actually makes them more successful than some of the ones that come after them, which often crumble under the weight of their ambitions. I agree with Ide that aesthetically and directorially they are the most uninteresting, though.

Yeah, I really liked the first one, it was a very fun little kids film. I stopped watching halfway through the 5th and never saw the ones after. They do rather get their head stuck up their arse